| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:26:27 PM |
If gettin more than a half dozen (new mails) a year is a lot...then I really get a lot, cause I get a heck of a lot more than that! But, I still don't feel like I get a great deal.
Whoever said a few per year has to be crazy. On average, if you're active and reasonably normal, then you'll get a lot of e-mail I would think. I mean, just one chat with a girl is like 10 e-mails lol. Even getting e-mails from 2 new people per month shouldn't be that hard.
A more interesting statistic, that will control for your level of activity and location, is one's rate of return. I'd say an average guy will get 3 positive responses out of 20 e-mails sent out. And 1 of those will probably result in a phone call or date. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:32:04 PM | | I don't get a lot of messages, and I don't prefer to. I used to get them and want them for one reason: dating. But that's gone kinda obsolete by now and I prefer to look at the forums and see what everyone's discussing. Of course, if people wanna message me, it's ok, but I don't expect to see anything new anymore and that's fine. | |
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dpd22
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Joined: 11/9/2006
Msg: 303 | |
| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:45:47 PM | A lot will have to do with your geographical challenges. If you are in a area that has few POF members then you just won't recieve as much mail. That was my situation when I was actively searching. Now that I am just here for the forums it doesn't matter.
The ratio is also a factor. In my area, the men/women ratio is about 3 to 1.
Even getting e-mails from 2 new people per month shouldn't be that hard.
The first 2-3 months I was on POF, I received some initial contacts. The past couple months I have received only a few initial contacts. Probably because I'm no longer the new person that people want to check out.
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/3/2007 7:53:36 PM | I get plenty of messages but it seems to come in spurts. The one thing I do hear a lot is that
women like a profile with some substance to it. So punch it up and tell them about yourself.
Good Luck. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/3/2007 9:34:29 PM | | I've been on here over 4 years and can count on one hand with 3 fingers left over how times a woman has wrote to me and one of those was just a woman commenting on a reply I made in a post. I'm lucky if they even write back to say "no thank you". What ever happened to that women lib stuff where the women were asking out us men? (lol) | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/4/2007 6:27:48 AM |
What ever happened to that women lib stuff where the women were asking out us men? (lol)
Well to start with now days women think that they get to pick and choose when they wish to be equal.
It doesn't work that way in my book but as long as others put up with it then they will continue to do it.
One thing that people need to remember is that according to POF women initiate contact less then 20 percent of the time. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/4/2007 5:33:56 PM | I agree with the poster that said you have to put yourself out there. I've been on here for a while and I put out feelers to the women. One thing I've noticed and it's quite funny as well is the "Viewed Me" page. Most of the women I sent messages to I see later check out my profile and after a week, you can see that they've checked it out a few times but they never respond to your message. Are these ladies afraid or are they just insecure? It just seems common sense to me that if you check out someone's profile after or before they sent you a message, there's at least a curiosity there.  | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 7/4/2007 9:16:06 PM | I do put myself out there and write to women that catch my interest, to no avail mostly. And yes, I see they checked out my profile but choose not to respond, and do the delete thing. Most of the responses I've gotten are from women I'm not interested in at all, although I do write back to at least say no thanks.
I've come to the realization that POF is good at what its primary purpose is, which is the forums and the advertising, than it is about actually meeting someone. Its much better now that I accept it on those terms. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/18/2008 10:48:49 PM | | I have been getting one message (when I have a pic and profile) per year for the last 3 years before that maybe one message every 2 years. I'm not talking about people replying to me rather the people who initiate contact. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 9:42:34 AM | I'm here for the forums, primarily, and perhaps to make some new friends. Most weeks I'll get an email from someone new, but of course not about dating.
When I was dating and using a different site, it was not unusual to get 10 or more new contacts in a week. Very few went beyond one or two exchanges, though, and fewer than 1 in 10 contacts resulted in dates, eventually. Someone made a point that having a well-written profile results in more contacts - I agree completely. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 9:44:04 AM | Yes I get loads of messages, some people wanting advice, cause they read my forum posts. Lots of messages lead to dates and friendship.
I've noticed the picture has a lot to do with how many people write me. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 2:01:01 PM | Yes I get first contacts, and then they write more later to tell me they noticed I`m with someone and ask if I`m still with her.
They dont read the profile first, they`re pic surfing and writing.
Just like the guys do. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 2:52:17 PM | This is a strange forum. The OP guy is gone and the thread is 4 years old. Who are we talking too?
I've sent out 25 messages so far in my first four days. 21 rejections and 4 maybes. So I know at least 25 pof guys have gotten a message. I wanted to respond to every message I got because I think most guys deserve a response (except jerks). That's what I wanted to but I can't. When I checked my mail after being here 2 days I almost canceled my account because there were so many message. I feel rude if I don't reply but I can't reply to a 100 messages a day.
Oh sorry I didn't mean to make this about me but what I am trying to say to the guys is that there seems to be way more guys on this place than there are girls. Your messages are getting lost in the mix. Most of you seem really nice but we girls are getting over whelmed with mail and we can't see you unless you write something super special.
I wish I knew what to tell you so you could get more replies. I think forum posting helps. On the other dating site I am on I almost always reply to forum regulars, after I get to know them.
Good luck and just keep reading the forums, learning, and trying. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 3:02:57 PM | | I would bet a lot of men dont due to some of the things they say in the forum. Its the best way to find out about that person. Forget the fake profile and read read read. lol. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 3:21:29 PM | | When I was on another dating site, I received some "winks" and initial emails. But I never actually met many of these women. In fact, I would stop hearing from many of them after exchanging a few emails. I guess some people have the "grass is greener on the other side" mentality. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 4:42:13 PM |
Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Yup! Sure do.
Well............what do you consider "a lot"??
I have messages on here daily!
Some days, or nights, I play email tag with a person or two.
I even get quite a few "first contacts".
Well, more-so than I send out!
But, I AM an attention whore and have a way of standing out!
Do I meet many of the people that contact me or that I contact? No.
In fact, the vast majority of "first contacts" that I receive, I'm not interested in.
Picky? nah.
But, everyone has their preferences! | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 4:54:05 PM | | This is my first time on forums. I havnt viewed your profile ,but if your not getting messages you should probably change your profile . Im not the best looking guy or really successfull, but I recieve alot of messages probably around 2 to 5 a day. Just post current accurate pictures be honest and sincere and Funny say something cute and clever and if you send a message read the womans whole profile before you send it! Refer to something you read, be clever. Women get sooooo many messages thats probably why they dont send as many as us, but they will get tired of recieving rude crude messages and ones that look they have been written by a 5 year old. lol and when they do go to look make sure your profile is ready lol I hope this helps | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 5:13:19 PM | what's considered alot? wow @ some people getting 3 in an entire year...that's...harsh. But yeah it's beating a dead horse, you gotta take the initiative and message them, they will rarely first contact msg you even if they are interested. such is life!
I get a pretty good percentage of replies on my first contact message, way more then what people on here are saying, but I dont just blast messages to tons of people and pray. just be selective, back it up with a decent profile, and only message people you're actually interested in getting to know, not just cause you like their pics. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 8:01:26 PM | You guys who are claiming you've only received a few messages in a year must be joking or have a really bad profile. (which you can always correct)
I think the key is just to have something in it that will compel them to contact you, whether it's something poignant or something completely off the wall bizarre and humorous. Better yet, all of the above. Anything that makes you stand out, really.
My first two months here, I was averaging 10-20 messages a day. Lately, it's about 5-10. 90% of the time they mention something about my profile in the initial message. So, I don't think it's always completely about looks. | |
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| Do any guys actually get a lot of messages on here?
Posted: 11/19/2008 8:27:05 PM |
What ever happened to that women lib stuff where the women were asking out us men? (lol)
I don't subscribe to those beliefs, I like being pursued it's just my dating style. Some women like taking charge and being the aggressor. I don't. I like getting messages, and I don't dole out very many. I have, but it hasn't worked out. It works out best when I let the guy pursue me, so that's what i'll keep doing. :) | |
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