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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 11:51:34 AM |
I've said elsewhere, higher consciousness seems to equal lack of conscience and it's sure been proven here... How disgusting!
Quite disgusting yet such an eloquent example of how absence of conscience knows no boundaries.
In the end REALITY is a fabrication of the mind.
Wow! So the mailman doesn't really deliver bills for electricity, etc - it is only our minds telling us he/she is? Hmmm...I must be typing on a keyboard fabricated by my mind. Sure feels real when my fingers are typing...but wait! Do I even really have fingers?
It's the distortion of REALITY is the more valid "fabrication of the mind", not reality itself.
JMHO | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:07:25 PM |
Or perhaps you ARE a guy who is headed in that direction...
I've always said that being in what I call a "just because" relationship is lonelier than being single; and I learned in my early twenties how non-fulfilling it is to settle for the sake of a relationship.
One trend I definitely notice is a growing number of people in today's world who can't find what they are looking for in a mate. I'm not talking about people who are asking for the moon and the stars, but people with reasonable expectations.
IMO it's due to the effects of destructive social/societal trends over the last 50 years that have resulted in a declining moral state in the West. These trends haven't run their course yet, but in time the cycle will have repeated itself once again and things will start to change for the better.
The dating pool reflects the societal climate, leaving much to be desired for many of us. People who have wisdom and understanding will simply always find fulfillment in life with -or without- a romantic partner. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:23:20 PM | Yeah and a lot of these guys are just saying "No thanks! I want more than an occasional dinner and night in the sack so if I can't have it all then I choose to spend my time doing my own thing without you!"
So, essentially, what you're saying is if the men can't have it their way, they've decided not to have it at all! I don't know about some of you, but that sounds pretty spoiled and angry to me.
That's a child's sentiment, if you think about it, correctly!
What a child says:
"I'm not doing it (with hands crossed over their chest). It's either my way, or I'm not doing it, says the little child. I'm not going to work in school, cause it's just too hard; I'm not going to read, because it's just too hard!"
Fine, don't read. But, when you can't get to college because you can't read, and you can't get a job, because you can't get to college...or, you have to take a lower level job that pays less, because you can't get a college degree, you'll know why it's important to learn to adapt.
Fine, don't work at a relationship, because you can't figure out the difference between a lady's communication and yours. Instead of trying, as men, for centuries before you did, give it up! After all, you've already failed! Don't find that one special lady who will make you feel good inside and might even teach you something you didn't know.
No, sometimes she doesn't like some of the things you do (and vice versa, you might not like some of the things she does).
Of course, if you abandoned 'every' relationship, when you don't like what you get, you would be jobless and poor, too. You would simply say, "I don't like the way my boss talked to me today, I'm quitting!; I don't like that my boss didn't give me that raise today, so I'm quitting."
Don't get married, don't have children...go...kill off the human species! Or, even better, father a bunch of kids that will grow up just like you...uncaring, cold, calculating that the entire world is against them, and running into some school to shoot off their anger, while their absentee dad is feeling like he's on top of the world, with his make believe attitude of, "I don't care!"
After all, all these so-called younger and desperate ladies are chasing you, simply because you're nothing more than a challenge to them. Woohoo, let's take advantage of all the 'kids' in the world...right fellas? Good thought pattern, fellas...be perpetual bachelors, just like your fathers wanted you to be, right? Be all that you can be...yeah right!
Then, one day, when you're old and grey, and alone, and reaching out for someone to hold your hand in death...let's see who's there for you, shall we?
Will it be the dozens of children you've left in your wake who don't even know you, because the woman was spurned by you? Will it be your 'so-called' friends, that have long since left, since you won't be able to maintain long term relationships, eventually.
Will it be all the medals and trophies you're so proud of, that line your wall?
That's funny, in all the years I've been alive, I've never seen someone cry out at their time of death, "Someone get me my trophies or medals" and believe me, I've seen many on their deathbeds.
No, instead, they wanted people around to hold their hand, and tell them that they loved them.
Eventually, you will see a woman and stay away from her, simply because she says something you don't like. Maybe you'll start to include other men into this realm too. Pretty soon, you'll be completely alone! Yes, I can see it now...go, be on your own. Please do!
It will save the rest of the women of this world from being involved with men who CAN'T commit to something or someone, longterm. Yes, it will actually direct those women to other men who have truly learned that there isn't anyone or anything that is perfect...less GOD! | |
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shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 304 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:30:15 PM |
I'm not going to work in school, cause it's just too hard; I'm not going to read, because it's just too hard!
Pretty much my thinking these days.
I know your rant was meant in sarcasm but I find myself agreeing with most of it.
you'll be completely alone!
Still got my golf buddies and the occasional FWB!
FORE! | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:30:44 PM | Feminism anger? Mad at men because we're sick of dating psychos who want us to be their babies daddy or support them in their IRS lawsuit. I don't want to have a run in with their Russian mafia ex boyfriend, so I think I'll just take some ME time.
Oh and the next psycho who breaks a lamp over my head will put me off women FOREVER. | |
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I purr
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Joined: 6/18/2008
Msg: 306 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:33:57 PM | | I sure hope this is not true. Could it be the women you are dating? Maybe where you met the women. Man is ment to be with woman and this is in the Bible so i am very surprised by your Priest friend. It is proven the couples live longer healthier lives. I am independent modern woman but I love the traditional values and love it when I am treated like a lady. Those that get ugly, in my opinion are just not very happy women. Treat people how you like to be treated. Back to basics I guess. I am happy on my own but I do realize and see that I am a much better me in a relationship. I am definately very well educated, but I am also the product of a farmer from Michigan, transplanted to Texas. I hope we all don't get so bitter that we just turn ourselfs inward. I could be that way but choose the be a part of a couple.. So, I do hope and pray that I find the men that are happy and not bitter as well. Good Luck to all the men and women. I just bet once they are happy inwardly they will again seek companionship of the opposite sex. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:35:50 PM | Wow, Sweetthang (msg. 375), I missed that quote earlier - but no matter, I think it's fictional anyway. Some dude is looking for points with that one.
Yeah and a lot of these guys are just saying "No thanks! I want more than an occasional dinner and night in the sack so if I can't have it all then I choose to spend my time doing my own thing without you!"
On the contrary, don't most men want an occasional dinner and a night in the sack? Ok - well maybe they might want to skip the dinner. I have a hard time believing otherwise. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:37:13 PM | Maybe it's the women you've chosen to date? Just a thought. :)
That's hardly feminism anger...just reality. Will you call that golf buddy, when you're dying, to hold your hand? I doubt it! ;)
Psychos...did it ever occur to you that maybe you shouldn't date psychos? hehe There are lots of wonderful women who will support you in your irs lawsuit, and lots of women out there that would have no problem being with you if you had children from other women. The problem is...you're devoted to the 'me' factor. What's in it for me?
Love isn't about "what's in it for me?" It's about what can you give to the other party to make them happy. You have it backwards, and therein lies the problem. | |
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shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 309 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:38:31 PM |
I hope we all don't get so bitter that we just turn ourselfs inward.
I don't think it's an issue of bitterness although I can understand why so many want to cast it that way. I've met close to 400 women in the 30 months. I just finally realized that it's a huge amount of work with very little gain. Most of the women don't appeal to me for one reason or another. I don't appeal to the few that interest me. Pretty cut-n-dried, not much emotion there.
Lots of work + few positive results = find something else to do. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:45:50 PM | Pretty cut-n-dried, not much emotion there.
And this is called...desensitization. Not all women will only give you a "few positive results."
I was married for fourteen years to the same person. In those fourteen years, when my hubby would return from a trip to sea...I bought a plane that dragged a banner behind it that told him his family loved him; I sent a clown to his job on his birthday to fight with him with balloons; I met him at his ship (he was in the military) in a teddy and high heels with a trench coat over it, so only he could see his gift, and a bow around me, so he could untie it, and that's just some of the things I did for him.
The idea that women aren't receptive enough to make it worth it, is one man's way of giving up, because it takes a lot of work to maintain a relationship, with anyone. But, there are many that are worth it. If, however, you choose to be with someone who treats you like dirt...you're right, it's not worth it. If you choose to be with the woman who really loves you, because YOU are HER knight in white shining armor, so to speak...then, expect LOTS of lovely thoughts and passions.
If you expect it, though...just like anything else in life, expect to be disappointed! | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:50:26 PM | sweet thang...i doint think its just the men that feel this way ....us women too .After divource or a long term relation ship ...we get bk out there and date we have fun we are all searching for the one ...sometimes we are lucky and get to find that soulmate we are all searching for ...others find peace and happiness in our own skin ...maybe we are scared for our hearts to be broken again so our wall and guard is up ....i personaley am enjoying being me ...i am capable of loving and i do love my children and grandchildren and my friends with all my heart ...but its not my time to need at the moment i am happy being me ....i wont say never because you never ever no ...but when i find or meet my soul mate ill no that ill need and want and love him more than anything in this world ....at the moment my opinion i think we just got to need again ...hugs joolsy | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:56:27 PM | Mia your new age beliefs quite literally sicken me as well as your use of it to disparage other posters. You are indicative of the type of drama queen that inhabit these forums. You are a troll using thinly veiled references to esoteric new age mysticism to antagonize others. You are quite a pro. But a pro what?
Sweetthang, it's quite literally true that it takes work on both sides of a relationships. But when someone spouts off about men not being willing to work hard enough to maintain a relationship is quite the reason that men are tired off your BS. I am tired of being "the problem" when women of mature years are willing to give as much as they take then maybe we'll have something to pursue again. | |
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shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 313 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 12:57:23 PM |
, because YOU are HER knight in white shining armor
Work.
Lots of work.
Good chance of sucky sex.
Based on my personal experience.
I like the way things are now.
I'm having wayyyyyyy better sex, dinner and an occasional event.
No bras hanging in my shower.
I only wish I could find *two* women like this so I can manage the cross-over when one moves on. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:00:01 PM | Good luck.
I read your profile and it appears that you are actively trying to turn people off.
Well...theres' some sense in that. Better to reject someone first before they reject you. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:01:17 PM |
In the end REALITY is a fabrication of the mind. Like the animal that reaches the edge of the cage but will not go out because that is what it has been condition to believe so does we humans create the same cages and limit our selves to those constraints. Little did you know that you can invent a new reality and that when you wake up it is that new reality the one you will be living.
Reality is as it is. Its the Perception of that reality, and past experiences, that create different responses to current issues.
But I like Angels response best... "the mailman doesnt bring the electric bills?"
Yeah, I get it, and I well understand how an animal is conditioned to certian perameters... for instance, I forget the name of it, when the scientist conditioned a dog to salivate every time a bell rang... Same thing with animals and cages... But were not that basic..
So, essentially, what you're saying is if the men can't have it their way, they've decided not to have it at all! I don't know about some of you, but that sounds pretty spoiled and angry to me. ROFL.. just like women want to be Modern Women, except when it comes to paying the check.. then its the mans responsibility. Or when women want to sit back, have the guy make the first move... because women dont contact men first. They dont take to rejection very well, but expect us to take it at thier whim...
Are you flippin nuts?? Thats such a VERY NARROW scope to which you are trying to apply logic.
That's a child's sentiment, if you think about it, correctly! And its not a childs sentiment to want all the good stuff and the fun, but they dont want to chip in when it comes to the work or the money... got it.
What a child says:
"I'm not doing it (with hands crossed over their chest). It's either my way, or I'm not doing it, says the little child. I'm not going to work in school, cause it's just too hard; I'm not going to read, because it's just too hard!"
Fine, don't read. But, when you can't get to college because you can't read, and you can't get a job, because you can't get to college...or, you have to take a lower level job that pays less, because you can't get a college degree, you'll know why it's important to learn to adapt. Wow... and you could VERY EASILY substitute the word "child" for Woman. Your POINT???
** Translated the Following **
Fine, don't work at a relationship, because you can't figure out the difference between a lady's communication and yours. Our communication styles are different... You should completely understand every nuance of idiocy that comes out of my mouth. Without Question!
Instead of trying, as men, for centuries before you did, give it up!
Because they were willing to pack their spines away, and just do as we say. YOU should have figured this out already.
After all, you've already failed! I have NO idea why Im wasting my time with you. Looser!
Don't find that one special lady who will make you feel good inside and might even teach you something you didn't know. Like me! But first you need to Submit to my complete authority over you!
LOL... Wow... social science at its best!
No, sometimes she doesn't like some of the things you do (and vice versa, you might not like some of the things she does). Like between the times she wakes up, and the times she goes to bed???
Of course, if you abandoned 'every' relationship, when you don't like what you get, you would be jobless and poor, too. Ummm How would abandoning a relationship make me jobless and poor? I would think that abandoning a sinking ship, would allow me at least a chance to survive... but no, I suppose you would prefer to go down with the titantic... Got it....
You would simply say, "I don't like the way my boss talked to me today, I'm quitting!; I don't like that my boss didn't give me that raise today, so I'm quitting." LOL.... I think you've gotten way ahead of your writing.. Perfect example.. your brain works too fast for the rest to catch up!
Don't get married, don't have children...go...kill off the human species! Or, even better, father a bunch of kids that will grow up just like you...uncaring, cold, calculating that the entire world is against them, and running into some school to shoot off their anger, while their absentee dad is feeling like he's on top of the world, with his make believe attitude of, "I don't care!" LOL... too rich. Apparently there are some women in Europe who have steralized themselves all for the good of the planet.... as far as being uncaring, cold, and calculating... Women have the courts firmly in their back pockets... lets see... We as men are going to do battle with dragons, carrying a sling shot. Got it! Women have developed that "I dont care" attitude, when they started telling men we were not good enough, that by the very fact we are men, all the evils of the world fall on our door...
After all, all these so-called younger and desperate ladies are chasing you, simply because you're nothing more than a challenge to them. Woohoo, let's take advantage of all the 'kids' in the world...right fellas? Good thought pattern, fellas...be perpetual bachelors, just like your fathers wanted you to be, right? Be all that you can be...yeah right! LOL.... Dont be mad that you are old, sagging, over the hill, and cant keep up with those young hotties that are doing the chasing. You probably had your chance with a guy, blew it... and are here to vent.
Then, one day, when you're old and grey, and alone, and reaching out for someone to hold your hand in death...let's see who's there for you, shall we? Well, with what you wrote... I'll definitly be glad its NOT YOU! I'd rather die at the tiller alone, than spend a night with a harping banshee....
Will it be the dozens of children you've left in your wake who don't even know you, because the woman was spurned by you? Will it be your 'so-called' friends, that have long since left, since you won't be able to maintain long term relationships, eventually. ROFL.... how many kids do you have? Got seduced/duped by that guy, squeezed out his kids... then after all is said and done, you realized he wasnt worth much huh?? So, we get to listen to your rant/rave while secretly you want what???
Will it be all the medals and trophies you're so proud of, that line your wall? LOL... At least they wont be sagging, wrinkled and tarnished! they also dont bytch either...
That's funny, in all the years I've been alive, I've never seen someone cry out at their time of death, "Someone get me my trophies or medals" and believe me, I've seen many on their deathbeds. Yeah, so have I. And the few Ive seen, have had good women they left behind. You just seem mad because no one's going to be calling for you....
No, instead, they wanted people around to hold their hand, and tell them that they loved them. Im sure that whomever this guy was, isnt going to be looking for you in any time short... No worries.
Eventually, you will see a woman and stay away from her, simply because she says something you don't like. Maybe you'll start to include other men into this realm too. Pretty soon, you'll be completely alone! Yes, I can see it now...go, be on your own. Please do! LOL.... Yeah, being alone and being lonely are TWO DIFFERENT THINGS!! GET OVER IT!
It will save the rest of the women of this world from being involved with men who CAN'T commit to something or someone, longterm. Yes, it will actually direct those women to other men who have truly learned that there isn't anyone or anything that is perfect...less GOD! LOL... It will keep our Wallets out of play, and endentured servitude off our backs.
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:01:18 PM | i agree with what you are saying . all the woman want a life time compannion to live with them and marry them. but they all wonder where are all the good men are. well there out there but there no longer going to get in the middle of a life that has made them not happy so they are without. i have been married 4 times and it was fun while it lasted but no more. i will live with myself and enjoy my life like most men are going too. iam happy with myself and dont need a woman 24 7 to help me make a living or pay my bills. i do miss the companionship of a woman and the closeness of a woman laying next to me in bed but i have learned to live with out that now for 7 years and i think i wil be ok another 7. woman use there sexy talking sexy dressing ways to get what they want when they want it and then you are left begging to have sex with them when they get tired of your ways. good luck to all men that have a girlfreind and wife they are hard to get and harder to keep happy than anything. RL | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:12:26 PM |
Wow! So the mailman doesn't really deliver bills for electricity, etc - it is only our minds telling us he/she is? Hmmm...I must be typing on a keyboard fabricated by my mind. Sure feels real when my fingers are typing...but wait! Do I even really have fingers?
Ha. And for instance, the mailman never delivers my electricity bills, since they are paid electronically.
And even though you are not typing in a keyboard fabricated by your mind, you composed that idea in YOUR mind. Made it physical and palatable to the senses, so you could see it in a box full of light where the symbols had a preconceived meaning, then you pressed a button and that record of your mental reality was converted into electrons that then were converted into something else to go through the WIFI, or the net, to then be re-written in some programers language to then find its way into a thousand computers where some program designed by some crazy guys, reconverted into text, and viewed on another light box, and then my eyes read it, and created in my head the image of your keyboard and the reality that you indicate exist.
So what is reality? Are you or all of us real? Yet we are little images in the screen that we can click and see and even say, you know what, I could potentially meet that person, and sleep with that person and fall in love with that person. Yet they are an image on a screen. A message in a bottle. A mailman delivering bills. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:39:05 PM | So, essentially, what you're saying is if the men can't have it their way, they've decided not to have it at all! I don't know about some of you, but that sounds pretty spoiled and angry to me.
That's a child's sentiment, if you think about it, correctly!
Since when did someone acting in their own best interes equate to a childish sentiment? This new self protecting trend does not come out of nowhere and is nothing more than a response to the cards on the table.
The problem is...you're devoted to the 'me' factor. What's in it for me?
See above statement.
Love isn't about "what's in it for me?"
I think most men would agree, hence the reason why they no longer show up at the altar!!
It's about what can you give to the other party to make them happy.
Once again, when faced by the impossible, the wise man chooses to learn from the past and other men's experience. Unappreciated giving has a shelf life and men are finally coming to this understanding.
You have it backwards, and therein lies the problem.
Others would say that you fail to see the big picture. There are two side to this coin and one is in the public, the other still well hidden. But the demasking of the other side is in progress, hence the new phenomenon! | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:45:06 PM |
And even though you are not typing in a keyboard fabricated by your mind, you composed that idea in YOUR mind.
Doesn't that statement contradict this one:
In the end REALITY is a fabrication of the mind. ?
Depends really on what interpretive approach one applies to REALITY - don't you think?
An idea is a concept and in that context, of course fabricated by the mind. Conversely, it is very much a tangible reality that if one were to not bathe for a year - he/she is going to smell bad at a minimum. So wouldn't the more valid interpretive approach to reality be more clearly defined by the use of the sum of all of our senses as interpreted by the mind? Rather than only by that which is created or fabricated by the mind?
So what is reality? Are you or all of us real? Yet we are little images in the screen that we can click and see and even say, you know what, I could potentially meet that person, and sleep with that person and fall in love with that person. Yet they are an image on a screen. A message in a bottle. A mailman delivering bills.
Would it be an equitable detante to suggest that behind the little images on the screen, the words posted in a thread, etc are in fact very real people? The little images and such are glimpses of this person or that person. Possibilities in and of themselves are not reality as the potential has not been realized, so it is not a factual event or real. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 1:55:05 PM |
After all, all these so-called younger and desperate ladies are chasing you, simply because you're nothing more than a challenge to them.
LMAO! Well it appears that sex is no longer sacred and readily available. That little new development will have some dramatic effects on the power balance as men are for the first time in a situation to ask "what are you bringing to the table?", "what have you done for me lately?". It will be great fun to sit in the peanut gallery and watch this little show play out lol! | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 2:16:30 PM | To answer the original question: "Is this a new phenomenon?"
Yes, to the extent that dating itself is a new phenomenon. The idea ofl making a widespread sampling of potential mates across cultural/religious/economic/intellectual /racial boundaries would have been anathema (and counterproductive) in every culture 100 years ago. It's still only commonly sanctioned in the western (read: American/Australian influenced) world and it's effectiveness toward finding a lasting liason is largely in question. | |
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I purr
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Joined: 6/18/2008
Msg: 323 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 2:55:22 PM | I am amazed at the response this thread has gotten and it is a few people that are banter back and forth a lot. Curious! At times so far off the point. :) :) :)
It is, to me about " The Law of Attraction". Most of the time when we get happy with ourself many doors open. I do believe that man and women are ment to be togehter. Yet, if you are happier alone stay that way. We cannot depend on others to make us happy, when we do that it tends to have more severe ups and downs. I have been alone more than I have been with a man in marriage for various reasons and nothing to do with "men" but unusual circumstances. I have had the committed relationships. I do have reasons to get cynical yet that is just not my choice. Maybe, I am still looking for the fairy tale or the all American Dream we are told about all of our life esp. as little girls. I am a mature adult female with grown children and now that it truly is my time to do for me eactly what is right for me I do desire the company, the friend, compansionship, partner in all ways, a man that compliments me. And it now is just a choice for no one but me. I still believe that no matter what has happened in my life or his we will find each other and the fairy tale or All Amreican Dream is out there in some form. And this is reality not fairy tale. It may be alterd to our age, and the times, but it is out there. I do believe that when you find a way to be happy this is a natural desire to share the joy of life. Just me. 
It is hard in an email to expess what is really ment. I notice how at times what people write is attacked instead of just read and thought about. It is hard to relay true emotion in writing. Something ment to be funny is taken seriously or in anger and many read things into what is said that was never ment.
I hope that we all just find our own way to be happy in this journey of Life. This is what it truly is about. Finding our own happiness and peace. For our life to just make sense, if only to us. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 3:02:25 PM | | There is not one big cosmic meaning for all,there is only the meaning we give to our life ,an individual meaning,an individual plot,like an individual novel,a book for each person ...........we are all individuals with our own minds ....we doint need some one preaching to us about there beliefs .....moving bk on to topic ......the greatest love is to love yourself ....let people be free to live there lives as they please who are we to judge them ..... | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 3:18:26 PM | I think so,most of my friends and myself included do not have or want a full time relationship with a woman.
Although we have female friends they also feel the same way.
I think in the past people were brainwashed into thinking that unless you had a life partner you were unhappy.
Women esp were looked upon as having something wrong with them if still single and men were considered homosexual.
Pop media helped fuel this stereotype until recently. | |
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