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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 3:30:18 PM |
So, essentially, what you're saying is if the men can't have it their way, they've decided not to have it at all! I don't know about some of you, but that sounds pretty spoiled and angry to me.
Nice rant.
What I find particularly humourous about it is that if a woman had started this thread with a similar view, you'd be in there like Flynn sayin', " You go girl! " .... and, if not you specifically, many of your sistas would.
Why are you so upset about men's choices along these lines? You sound very angry.
I for one, and I THINK I can speak for most of the men who've contributed here, didn't 'give up' in any relationship. I tried in the best ways I knew how to get into and maintain relationships. I WORKED at them to the best that I knew at those times. I dated at least a hundred women in the first few years after my ex left. It was very expensive and there was very little substantive pay-off. It was exhausting and discouraging.
Now, I just can't be bothered. I have my sons, I have my sailboat, I have friends and family.
See, you seem to espouse the typical late 20th, early 21st century female attitude that no matter what happens in life in general and in relationships specifically, it's invariably a MAN'S FAULT. The man is FLAWED.
But, we don't live in a vacuum. OUR attitudes and POV are relfections and reactions to what we have experienced in our interactions with women.
Good, bad, new? Yes, no, maybe. Who knows? But, there are more and more men who are really asking if marrying, living with or having kids with women is such a great idea.
And, believe it or not, many of us ARE NOT bitter or angry. We are simply exercising our right to self-determination, nothing more.
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 3:51:11 PM |
So, essentially, what you're saying is if the men can't have it their way, they've decided not to have it at all! I don't know about some of you, but that sounds pretty spoiled and angry to me.
Spoiled and angry? I may be a social oddity here, so let me tell about my situation and what I think that this thread is about.
I am single, I have not been on a date in three years, I do not do friends with benefits, I do not do one night stands, and it has even been a long time since I have encountered ,,,,myself. Ha hahaha. Am I an ass? No. Am I childish? No. Do I want my way? Absofriggin lutely. Do I want a woman in my life? Absofriggin lutely.
But, I am not willing to settle for a woman that is weak minded. I do not want a woman that moves from man to man. I do not want a woman that has sex outside of love. I see men that are pieces of shit because they don’t really care who they have sex with as long as she is cute and not too much of a pain in the ass. Well, I see plenty of women with that exact same approach, which in turn, to me, makes them pieces of shit.
Man, was that ruthless or what.
Further, women, often, will have sex with a man as long as it is an under the carpet deal. No strings, no stories, as long as no one else knows about it and they don’t have to feel guilty. Yep, common ‘good girls’ that are closet tramps.
Am I prude? Sure, why not. Because I don’t want a woman like that; I am disgusted by that behavior.
I am not spoiled, I am not angry, I am scared. I am scared to fall in love with a woman and one day find out that she is/was a tramp. I want a woman that I can respect, and I would lose that instantly. Could you imagine falling in love with a woman, being in love with her, and not wanting her at the same time? That would be inhumane torture, and I don’t want that.
I would rather be single and have bouts of sexual frustration from time to time than have my heart ripped apart like that.
I may be an oddity, even a prude, but I know what I want. And yes, If I cant have it, I would rather go without. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 4:10:00 PM |
Captain Blaugh
Check out David Deida he may have some answers for you, and maybe not... I dunno...
Thanks, but I've lived/read/experienced more of the para/quasi-spiritual teachings in the past 30 years than many encounter in a lifetime. I'm familiar with your beliefs and I'm just too much of a balls-to-the-wall sorta guy to buy it as the panacea you believe it is.
Earlier, I had compared you with a skipping needle on a vinyl disk. Now, I'm thinking more like a kid who told his/her first joke, finding that adults think it's funny.... and tells it again, and again, and again, and again, and again,and again... ad nauseum....
I'm happy you have a belief system that works for you, but please, stop preaching. It really does diminish you and your message.
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 4:17:20 PM | The first few responses sums up this entire thread. The guy wrote out an eloquent essay on what he sees as a new phenomenon among MEN, in which they find many women have become inconsiderate and unfulfilling partners. Instead of lambasting women, he specifically outlines a specific behavioral change he's noticed among MEN and queries, presumably, other MEN about whether they've noticed the same. Almost as if planned, the first two responses are essentially two women saying, "Well women too!"
Priceless. | |
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shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 330 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 5:11:43 PM |
I dated at least a hundred women in the first few years after my ex left. It was very expensive and there was very little substantive pay-off. It was exhausting and discouraging
It can't be fun.
That's what I find annoying.
It's so damn "goal-oriented" with these women.
"MUST... .FIND.... THE..... ONE"
We can't just have fun and no worry about "find the THE ONE".
Nope, it's not like our lives are half-over, noooooooooo......
Nope, we've got to find THE ONE, the ONLY ONE, the perfect mate, even though we're not looking to build a household or have children anymore.
We can't just have fun with what's left.
It's annoying.
Screw 'em. | |
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shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 331 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 5:15:37 PM |
I see men that are pieces of shit because they don’t really care who they have sex with as long as she is cute and not too much of a pain in the ass
"Cute" is not absolute with me! 
women, often, will have sex with a man as long as it is an under the carpet deal. No strings, no stories
Tastes great, less filling.
Where can I find one more like this? | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 7:26:12 PM | So, essentially, what you're saying is if the men can't have it their way, they've decided not to have it at all! I don't know about some of you, but that sounds pretty spoiled and angry to me.
Spoiled and angry? I may be a social oddity here, so let me tell about my situation and what I think that this thread is about.
I am single, I have not been on a date in three years, I do not do friends with benefits, I do not do one night stands, and it has even been a long time since I have encountered ,,,,myself. Ha hahaha. Am I an ass? No. Am I childish? No. Do I want my way? Absofriggin lutely. Do I want a woman in my life? Absofriggin lutely.
But, I am not willing to settle for a woman that is weak minded. I do not want a woman that moves from man to man. I do not want a woman that has sex outside of love. I see men that are pieces of shit because they don’t really care who they have sex with as long as she is cute and not too much of a pain in the ass. Well, I see plenty of women with that exact same approach, which in turn, to me, makes them pieces of shit.
Man, was that ruthless or what.
Further, women, often, will have sex with a man as long as it is an under the carpet deal. No strings, no stories, as long as no one else knows about it and they don’t have to feel guilty. Yep, common ‘good girls’ that are closet tramps.
Am I prude? Sure, why not. Because I don’t want a woman like that; I am disgusted by that behavior.
I am not spoiled, I am not angry, I am scared. I am scared to fall in love with a woman and one day find out that she is/was a tramp. I want a woman that I can respect, and I would lose that instantly. Could you imagine falling in love with a woman, being in love with her, and not wanting her at the same time? That would be inhumane torture, and I don’t want that.
I would rather be single and have bouts of sexual frustration from time to time than have my heart ripped apart like that.
I may be an oddity, even a prude, but I know what I want. And yes, If I cant have it, I would rather go without.
No, you're not a social oddity, you just want what many want...a woman that doesn't sleep around. There is nothing wrong with that, at all. Don't worry...I think that message is getting across to 'some' women, finally, thankfully. I'll tell you something now, I'm one that agrees with you. I don't go along with 'the friends with benefits program', nor do I believe in sleeping around.
But I do like being with someone, longterm. However, not in a fantasy type situation that has no chance of growing into something, and eventually hurts others. Personally, I want to be married to someone before I take that all important step, because you can have lots of time to get to know the person, deep inside, rather than just jumping into something or someone you can't understand.
By the way, I'm not old or pruny, as some have said in this thread, but thanks for the comments, hehe. In fact, I'm considered, generally (by most who meet me), to be quite attractive. But hey, if you want kids, feel free. Personally, I'm ok with that, because I'm into men, not little boys. ;)
Honestly, I would have to say that I wouldn't even contemplate going out with many of the guys in this thread, simply because of the way "they think". They appear to have severe anger issues with women as a whole.
It's all about controlville, and to me, that's childish. It's also about protecting one's self against some woman that might want to be your mate. So, essentially, many of you kill off any possibility of being with ANY woman, intimately, long before the relationship ever has a possibility of anything happening.
So, essentially, if you're just after sex...why not just say that in your profiles? Why not just pay for it? Or, if you're JUST AFTER FRIENDS, why not just say THAT in your profile? Please make sure to include the fact that you aren't interested in anything other than that, no matter what! I'm sure you will get some responses from KIDS, and 'a few women' that think they can change your mind, hehe. I'd suspect, though, not that many.
Yes, you're right, they don't ****, gripe, and THEY open their legs for anything, including you. Pass the aids, will ya? ;) Yes, they're very fearful of what you think of them, because they 'THINK' they can change your mind, after you've been with them, hehe. Don't worry, when they wake up from their wild fantasies, they will leave you and you can find yet another poor woman's brain to f-u-c over, while you have your way with them. Then, when they take revenge on some poor guy's heart that you know, you can say, um...sorry dude! And transfer your work over to some other poor woman, because you're ticked off at women as a whole.
So, essentially, you've lowered yourselves to treating another human being like SHIT and just USING THEM, because they're not bright enough to know that they're being used. You're feeding on someone's insecurities. Sad, eh? Congrats, that makes you a REAL MAN, doesn't it? Ahem...hehe. ;)
Ok, if you want to believe that, feel free. Personally, I think it makes you look more like a m-iserable a-ss l-icking e-nema, and a p-etty, i-gnorant, p-iece of s-hit..or more commonly known as MALE PIGS! :)
You know I knew of someone who did some of these things in his marriage, and he too, had to learn the hard way. He thought his wife was going to cheat on him. So, one day, he decided to get her back. Mind you, this wasn't the type of lady to cheat on anyone, but he had it happen so many times, previously, that he just 'assumed' she would join the pack of wolves that pre-dated her.
That made me wonder...what really happened to him in the past? Maybe, just maybe, what he assumed would happen and assumed did, because of all the others...never really occurred? Hmm...maybe?
Regardless, he protected his feelings by cheating on his wife. She and I were close friends, and she came to me to talk about it, one day. She was devastated that he would do this to her. She knew for a fact, because she found out from the gal herself. Then, she confronted him, and he admitted it. Thus, he killed the relationship all because he THOUGHT his wife already did the same to him, as his other gf's. He got her back for something that never occurred. Amazing eh? He was so busy protecting himself from his wife, that he never even considered that she hadn't done anything wrong to be protected against. She never did do anything, though, ever! From that point forward, their relationship was not the same. Here was a loving attentive woman that was gorgeous, and he cheated on her, all because he was afraid that she might do it to him. Sad, eh?
Moral of the story...not everyone is the same. If you punish the rest of the world on a 'maybe they're like that too', you end your life, as you know it...long before it ever started. There are always bad apples in the basket, but there are always good ones too. Sometimes, you have to stop being fearful and take a leap of hope, before you can find them. Of course, if you keep doing the same thing over and over, the response will always be the same.
What if you applied this in a business sense? If you keep typing the same advertisement, but it wasn't getting you the business you wanted...why would you keep typing it over and over again? No, instead, you would try different things. Would you just give up? If you did, you wouldn't eat! That's the problem! You go after the same type of women, you get the same type of woman and you get treated the same way. You go after one who wants to treat you kind, you get one that treats you kind.
But, if you don't put the same effort into the relationship...it will burn out quickly! Why should she keep being nice, if you don't know how? | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 7:45:43 PM |
So, essentially, you've lowered yourselves to treating another human being like SHIT and just USING THEM, because they're not bright enough to know that they're being used. You're feeding on someone's insecurities. Sad, eh? Congrats, that makes you a REAL MAN, doesn't it? Ahem...hehe. ;)
Ok, if you want to believe that, feel free. Personally, I think it makes you look more like a m-iserable a-ss l-icking e-nema, and a p-etty, i-gnorant, p-iece of s-hit..or more commonly known as MALE PIGS! :)
^^^^ Why so angry? Why so offended by opinions that are shared by many men and women? | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 7:53:04 PM | I'm not offended at all. Personally, I think the men are choosing it for a different reason...lack of control and fear. I'm not angry, trust me. ;) I find it kind of comedic, to be honest.
Women are doing it for a different reason than men, in case you're not aware of it. They're doing it because they're tired of being controlled.
You pull out one sentence and specify it as anger? You have to read it, in its entirety, to make sense out of the entire thing. :) Otherwise, you're right...it can be read as anger. However, that's not the way it's meant.
You see...I'm a woman, so I have lots to choose from, remember? Isn't that what the book many of you get this from, teaches you?
How about you fellas? hehe ;) Are the ladies crawling all over you, yet? | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 8:05:29 PM |
You pull out one sentence and specify it as anger? You have to read it, in its entirety, to make sense out of the entire thing. :) Otherwise, you're right...it can be read as anger. However, I don't think I have a problem with anger at all.
Touche.
Just as much of what men say in this thread and others are taken by women as whining and 'childish', which is a term I think you used in an earlier post.
Personally, I think the men are choosing it for a different reason...lack of control and fear.
Well, you can personally think anything you want, that is your right. Beautiful.
But, your belief just MAY NOT be accurate no matter how hard you overlay what men say with what you believe.
And, believe it or not, it's not just one sentence that comes across as angry and bitter. The TONE of your posts from the past couple of pages come across as angry, if not angry AND bitter.
... but, of course, I am JUST a man, right? And, therefore (if memory serves), incapable of communication or working at ANY relationship....
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/2/2008 8:29:54 PM | i think the more well-educated and better career, the more choices one has. certainly, no need for a 2-career couple. in addition, i know my ex (and he fits into the category of which you speak) is definitely having a difficult time finding women who are both attractive and professional peers. (they don't seem to exist lol) add to that, he doesn't particularly have an interest in women with children. well, it makes for 'slim pickens' - yet, he's also lonely and would like to find someone. at times, he gives up. he eventually looks again only to be disappointed yet again. it may well be an unwitting trend.
in my case, i'm very particular combined with enjoying my freedom, so i really don't plan to marry again, although i wouldn't mind having a pt-time bf (not under my roof, but available 3 or 4 nights/week) i enjoy the excitement & titillation of a new relationship, but i have no desire for the day-to-day nitty gritty aspects
my ex and i are both fairly well-adjusted and we seem (independent of one another) to be living the very lifestyle you describe; albeit, for slightly differing reasons | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 4:15:30 AM |
Touche. Just as much of what men say in this thread and others are taken by women as whining and 'childish', which is a term I think you used in an earlier post.
I don't consider it whining. However, what I consider childish is the fact that men use women...especially kids who are susceptible to their shenanigans, and they break their hearts simply because they can. That's childish! Another thing that is childish is to fold one's arms in front of themselves and claim that they're not dating anyone, just because they can't have it their way. Of course, this is in MY humble opinion, naturally...to which I'm entitled to. Of course, make no bones about it, though...I read their entire posts, though, and did not take out just one aspect of their conversation, so that it didn't make sense, based on the emotions they showed here.
Personally, I think the men are choosing it for a different reason...lack of control and fear.
Well, you can personally think anything you want, that is your right. Beautiful.
But, your belief just MAY NOT be accurate no matter how hard you overlay what men say with what you believe.
Thank you for the compliment. Maybe not...but, then again, maybe so. The fact is that we see this trend more and more. Unfortunately, way too many are following the trend and losing out because of it, sadly. So, maybe, just maybe, I'm not that far off from the reality of the situation.
And, believe it or not, it's not just one sentence that comes across as angry and bitter. The TONE of your posts from the past couple of pages come across as angry, if not angry AND bitter.
Well, I just say things matter of factly, and sometimes that can be 'read' in a forum such as this, as anger. But trust me, you will know if I am angry. I actually say it outright. ;)
... but, of course, I am JUST a man, right? And, therefore (if memory serves), incapable of communication or working at ANY relationship....
No, not "incapable", just undesirous of it, according to many who have said so, in this forum. The problem is the same with many of these things. If you avoid things, outright, eventually you can lose the ability. Thus, if you don't use your socialization skills with the opposite sex, you might find out that they don't exist anymore, one day. Same thing applies to sex. There might be a bunch of impotent people running around, just because they haven't in a very long time. ;) Just something to think about. Yes, if you don't exercise many of your abilities...you might NOT have them one day. hehe | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 7:26:42 AM | Mia and Sweetthang are making it perfectly obvious why men are choosing the single life. Mia with her flakiness, an absolute fruitcake nuttiness would be a perfect horror show for anybody crazy enough to go for a ride. The creepiness factor would keep you awake at night and there are so many just like her out there riding their energy sucking religion.
And Sweetthang with her bitterness at being dumped by her knight in shining armour. She'd be the bitter control freak who had been cheated on in the past and would make life miserable for any male crazy enough to try to make a connection.
There are just so many angry, bitter, lazy and nutty women that there isn't much hope for an average joe to meet a decent women and settle down.
POF should have a fruitcake meter so we can rate the nutjobs like Mia and a fearfactor to rate Sweety. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 8:09:18 AM | dc chick..sayS isent that what MOST, guys want a night in the sack..and they want to skip the dinner...
Oh, sorry - men don't like to eat and/or have sex? My bad. Someone sold me some propaganda...lol
in another one of her stupid blogs she states...
No one here reads my blogs, nor did I ever post a blog about anything here. I may have "posted" a response tho...is that what you meant?
that she still has sex weather shes dating OR not.......
so what does she have against guys doing this???
I don't have anything against guys who do that, where do you think I learned not to forego sex when not involved? I learned that from men - who taught me that I don't have to get all my stuff in one place - because most of them don't. Men are sometimes the best teachers for that stuff, but I digress...where are you getting your double standard theory from? I believe that anyone who's not in a relationship is free to do whatever the hell they want. Did you read what I posted correctly? I didn't say it was wrong or that I had a problem with it, I said I don't believe MEN would honestly have a problem with dinner and a night in the sack, based on a quote from somewhere else. Please read stuff I write correctly before you post and respond to it. Alrighty then? Kthanksbye. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 8:28:48 AM | thymekiller did make me giggle about your fruitcake meter ....we are not all angry bitter ,lazy nutters you no ...there are some goodies out there ....thank u for making me smile though .......a ickle nutty joolsy :  | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 8:47:10 AM |
Mia and Sweetthang are making it perfectly obvious why men are choosing the single life.
Sorry guys, I am not following your train of thought. These two women seem to actually have their shit together. I meet very few women who actually understand that there are levels of consciousness. They mention that younger women are not very self aware, and no, that is not the same as selfish. I see that they use logic with their emotions. I would love to find a woman that is on an even playing field, mind wise.
There are just so many angry, bitter, lazy and nutty women that there isn't much hope for an average joe to meet a decent women and settle down.
Yes, that is true. But you have to think as to why they are that way. You have to admit that men, by and large, are not very understanding and write off women’s behaviors as infantile. Well, women do the same thing to men, just in the opposite direction.
There are many angry, bitter, and nutty women; I can’t help with the lazy bit. But, as a man, have you ever tried to connect with them? I don’t think that most men can, not that it can’t be done, I just think that most men will not allow themselves to delve that deep into the mind of another. I did once. It was with a woman that men would say ‘had issues’. But honestly, it was the most beautiful thing that I have ever experienced.
Most people have safeguards in place to protect themselves from others. These safeguards are what keep us single, and many times, they also keep us from connecting with the one that we love, and they keep us on the superficial level.
I think that I am fairly high up on the consciousness ladder, so to speak, and I recognize those that are where I have been, or are not where they should be, and I try to help them overcome their obstacles. That is not by doing it for them, but usually by pointing out where they are. How do you know where to go if you do not know where you are?
Imagine if you had a sister that was an angry, bitter, and nutty woman. Would you blow her off and ignore her? Or, would you want to understand where she was coming from? | |
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shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 342 | |
| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 8:53:22 AM |
Imagine if you had a sister that was an angry, bitter, and nutty woman. Would you blow her off and ignore her?
Yes.
Believing you can fix others is usually a mistake.
Even if your belief is "right" and theirs is "wrong" (which is not a given), they're often resentful. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:09:33 AM |
There are many angry, bitter, and nutty women; I can’t help with the lazy bit. But, as a man, have you ever tried to connect with them?
Yes been there and I got the scars to prove it. Not mental scars, physical scar tissue.
I've had enough. You can have all the damaged goods from now on. It's yours I let you have the choice of all the bitter women. I'm going to go fishing.
Join me when your weird-shit-o-meter breaks trying to understand some new age crap in order for you to get laid. I'll be the happy bachelor on the lake with my dog and a few friends. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:21:07 AM |
Yes.
Believing you can fix others is usually a mistake.
Even if your belief is "right" and theirs is "wrong" (which is not a given), they're often resentful.
Both statements are absolutely true. But, I did not say anything about fixing anyone. There is no fixing. In most cases there is nothing really wrong with them, besides, the ‘issues’ that they have are what make them who they are, it would be a mistake to take that away. I was talking about connecting with them. Meaning, for the most part, that you understand their issues and where they are coming from, and, a big AND, you are ok with those issues.
It is hard to explain an experience that doesn’t really have words to it, but I am doing my best.
Resentfulness. Hmm, as far as I can understand, that is when a woman lets you into her mind, her issues, and you are not ok with them, because you tried to fix them when there was nothing to fix. Those issues are there, they are not going anywhere, they are not bad, they cannot be fixed, they just are. So, trying to fix them would be an insult on her character.
If you are not ok with her issues, or try to fix them, or, worse, the worst that one can do, of you use those issues against her and her person, then you are not in the position, or have the capability yet, to experience that connection with another person. So you pull back, and she becomes resentful, because if she let you in, then she did trust you, and then you turned away. That would hurt anyone. | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:25:32 AM |
I don't consider it whining. However, what I consider childish is the fact that men use women...especially kids who are susceptible to their shenanigans, and they break their hearts simply because they can.
The circle speach is never ending. So you don't think there is an equal amount of women who use men? What do you think this thread is all about?
That's childish! Another thing that is childish is to fold one's arms in front of themselves and claim that they're not dating anyone, just because they can't have it their way.
If that was the case, then this thread and phenomenon would not exist. It's not about men having their way, or partially their way...it's about them having no way which after some maturing makes them realize there is only one path left. Namely deferral all together.
I can honestly say after spending some time on the forums that my conviction that I hit the freaken jackpot is solidified beyond any doubt! | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:55:13 AM |
(Miashakti) (a droopy penis will sometimes do that to a person)
Boy, didn't take much to get YOUR claws out, did it?
Arlo  | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 10:10:41 AM | almost feel like i shouldn't post because OP was looking for male opinions, but i just was compelled to say that unlike some who have posted, i am not SADDENED by this turn of things; instead i find it refreshing and it gives me hope for the future
i think its great that these gentlemen enjoy life so much that they feel complete without a woman; i feel the same way of my life without a man. i do think there are more people coming to this conclusion, male AND female, and I don't think its sad;
i think most marriages and relationships would stay solid if the people in them were more self-fulfilled and self-realized BEFORE they took on a partner......people look for a partner to complete them, and when that doesn't happen, the relationship is over, and you have two incomplete people who just look for the next missing piece instead of realizing that the missing piece is inside themselves
jmho | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 11:46:22 AM | +1 beadonna very nice.
I can't believe people are actually fighting over this. You were "meant" to co-exist with every
person on the planet. It's far better to focus on building a complete life as best you can and
then if a woman comes into the picture you assess if she'd be a good fit and vice versa.
Thus your life that you have created provides the majority of your stimulus and unburdends
your relationship from carrying the load.
O | |
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| Is this a new social phenomenon???
Posted: 7/3/2008 12:20:51 PM | I third that - lovely post from beadonna
^^^^And also from Obsidian
I suppose it is something of a new-ish phenomenon, though I don't think there's any gender bias. I've read articles about this being a new phenomenon for women too - the rise of the 'freemale'.
We now have the luxury of not NEEDING a partner in a pure survival sense. Additionally, our environment is so stimulating, given an enquiring mind, that life 'alone' can be very fulfilling. I know mine is. As a man, I feel I have had to conquer my desires for sex and companionship, so these things don't own me and drive me, just as I am in control of other pleasures in my life. If the desire for something drives you, then you are its victim and open to being victimized (just like casinos victimize gambling addicts)
However I do feel for myself that there is a possiblility of this being a two-edged sword; the more comfortable and content I become alone, the less open I am of someone in my life and the compromises that will entail. | |
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