| Do You Believe It is Possible to Find Your Future Husband/Wife via Online Dating?
Posted: 6/9/2008 5:20:47 PM | | Times have changed since the old days of meeting people through family and friends. I think it's more common that allot of people are trying online dating because there has been allot of successful stories. Society is more willing to accept online dating because so many people do it. Back many years ago, you mention online dating and people start thinking freaks, losers, people with no friends. Just have to be optimistic about the chances! | |
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| Do You Believe It is Possible to Find Your Future Husband/Wife via Online Dating?
Posted: 6/21/2008 11:28:01 AM | After I got out of a short marriage (married a year and a half, together for five years total), I knew I needed a new start, and I signed up on this and several other dating sites, some free and some pay.
I was on this site and match for six months. I met 14 guys total. The ONLY criteria my dates had to meet was: 1) Be under thirty (I'm 24, was 23 then) and 2) Don't scare me in any way. I wanted to be open-minded and also wanted to get over my shyness and I figured that going out with as many different people as possible would help me to be successful, both in my search for a relationship and in my personal life. I suffer from horrible anxiety, social and general. Being single brought all my fears to the front of my life, and I decided to fight through them and force myself to meet new people and go on dates.
To put me and my experience into perspective, I'm young and look younger, often described as the chubby but cute variety. Never been the belle of the ball, but usually never went without a boyfriend for too long--just had to try harder to find one than a supermodel would.
So I ended up meeting 14 men over the course of six months. Out of those men:
*3 wanted sex only
*2 felt no sparks
*3 wanted very, very casual relationships with weekly or monthly dates
*6 wanted committed, serious relationships with some future potential
So, overall, if you're an average girl in your 20s who lives in a populated area (I live right outside NYC), seems like your odds should be good at meeting guys your age who do want relationships and are genuine.
I liked some of the men and didn't like others. I met a disproportionate amount of short computer geeks, for some reason. Short, I've never minded much, but I'm not interested in computers.
I fell for one of the guys who only wanted a casual relationship. We saw each other maybe seven or eight times before we realized that we wanted different things and started breaking away from each other.
One guy I met was perfect for me. If I'd had to write out the kind of man I'd pick for myself, it would be him. He was a snide, chubby Jewish athiest with wild hair and a good Barenaked Ladies collection, and I liked him a lot. He was brilliant, funny and kind and loved me on sight. Right after we met, he went on vacation to Puerto Rico with plans to see each other when he got back. I felt like crying when he left even though it was only for a week.
While he was gone, another guy I'd been casually emailing with but wasn't that interested in asked me out. As I wasn't seeing anyone exclusively, I agreed. I didn't think it would go anywhere--I found his emails boring and was pretty excited over the other guy--but I didn't think it would hurt to at least meet, have a few drinks. So, he picked me up in a blizzard and we went to a bar.
We stayed at that bar for five hours. His "boring" emails had been the result of shyness and awkwardness--but he wasn't boring at all in person. And he liked me, and I liked him. From then on, we were inseperable. I felt bad about hurting the first guy's feelings but I couldn't help it. I really fell in love.
Now, I'm engaged to the "boring" guy who I didn't even really want to meet, and I'm pregnant. We're getting married in September, and our baby is going to be born in January. You CAN meet someone online and marry them. You really can. I would just say to be very openminded, don't be too superficial, and maybe venture a little outside your comfort zone sometimes and try out new things that you might not ordinarily do. | |
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