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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/5/2008 10:35:20 PM |
OK, I went cycling... barely made it up a long, steep hill and sat down on the ridge to catch some breath. There comes a gorgeous looking guy biking fast up that hill, effortlessly... I am sitting there, panting, thinking that, in an ideal world, he'll strike a conversation. Sure enough, he stops, asks me if I am OK, I say yes, compliment him for his biking skills, and we chat for a while. Problem is, I've just biked 8 miles and I am all sweaty, so I am giving him mixed signals. He is sensitive to the signals like a barometer, I can see he is dying to get my phone number, but eventually I get totally embarrassed by the whole situation, touch the bike's handle bar to pull away, and immediately he wishes me a good day and disappears, and I can see he does so with regret.
Were the signals that he was so sensitive to your heavy panting and you sweating profuciously?  Maybe he just wasn't into you. | |
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Durken
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Joined: 5/8/2008
Msg: 151 | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/5/2008 11:07:54 PM | | Interesting thread. abc6587, read the posts by the women, then read the posts by the men. Can you see why so many of us are on here now? You're expected not to be forward, and let's face it, most women don't want to be forward. Sounds like you would have gave him the number if he would've asked. It's too bad he didn't. | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/5/2008 11:38:34 PM | Ladies, if we could read your minds...trust me...not a single man would be on this site.
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Oh thats it! And I'd be a millionaire, president of shocko, about 5" bigger and 3" more around. Anyone else here into psychic mindreading, ghost hunting, hollow earth theories. Then I could meet a woman.
Yeah ladies, don't you know we aren't psychic, that explains why we are all here. you guys will be single for a long time. I don't think our bicycling gal will be though.
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(((Google up "sexual harassment and you" it should pop up.))) Hey, for all you pissed off guys waiting for ladies to poke a hole in their wet panties when they meet you, try watching Saturday Nite live if your dating style isn't working. And google "stalking" and see what pop up. I dare ya
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 12:02:01 AM | 
One man's 'Answer' to "Where are all the "Good Men"?
That I found on a "Love Thread", someplace..?
Note, I did NOT write this.
Although I share a lot of his views !!
~~Some Women Ask---"Where are all the good guys?"
I'll tell ya. A " lot " of us good men, are sitting back, with what "dignity" we have "left", comtemplating "why", a " lot " of women, "say" that they "want" a "good man", when in "reality", all those
( 'good men'= seeking women ) are going to do once they "get" us, is cheat on us with the "bad men !". Women say they want a "good man", but yet, they can't seem to "handle" being treated "good"... DUH------ I guess you're so use to being treated bad, that you can't accept someone who will be good to you, and "that" is so very, very "S A D" !!!
You "want" us, but when you "have" us, you screw us over, time and time again. It's almost like you would rather "be with" someone who is going to treat you like Shit, use you as a damn "punching-bag", talk bad about you to all of their friends, hide things from you, etc.etc.,blah, blah, blah......
I "personally", just can't fathom "Why" a lot of "women", want men to be so bad to them. "Some" of you "MUST LIKE" men to beat the crap out of you, or cheat on you....
Now I know most of you will say,,"that's b/s, but really now, sit down and think " REAL DEEP" about it;
Have you ever "had" a "good man" ? If you answered "yes", then WHY= aren't you still with him? 
If you have a "truly good man", then "he" will "not" cheat on you, because "true" good men , actually "C A R E" about "YOUR FEELINGS", so ( for the "most" part ) you can't use "cheating" as an answer. "Good men", treat people with "respect", "kindness", and "appreciation", so It would be somewhat "hard" for me to believe that- "
" well, he didn't treat me right, or good", "he CHEATED on me", he called me names, he hides his feelings( or information,etc.etc.)
"He wasn't a good man=in the first place!!
Because I know a lot about how "good men", treat "people". I'm one of them; but we get tired of falling for someone who "says" they "want" us, but "act" in a different fashon, and insult our feelings, pride, and intelligence. So, in Fact, If you "had" a "good man", and "lost" him, then 9 times out of 10, you were NOT a "good woman", and you deserved losing him. And he "surely" is better off "without" someone who is "FAKE and FLAKE".
It's no wonder "some" of you can't seem to find us... You can't open you eyes, mind, OR HEART.
Most of the time, we are right here under you nose, but in order to "see" us, you will have to take your "head out of the CLOUDS." Good Luck, God Bless.
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The strength of a man
The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
It's in the width of his arms that encircle you.
The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
It's in the gentle words he whispers.
The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
It's how good a buddy he is with his children.
The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work.
It's in how respected he is at home.
The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
It's in how tender he touches.
The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest.
It's in his heart, that lies within his chest.
The strength of a man isn't how many women he's loved.
It's in being true to one woman.
The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
It's in the burdens he can carry.
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 11:54:39 AM |
pyscho or freako .....really, you'd unzip and do all that, then meet me cycling in Lou Ky
??????? I have no idea what you meant by that. | |
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Durken
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Joined: 5/8/2008
Msg: 156 | |
| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 3:39:20 PM | ^^^^^Yeah, I just saw that....I didn't type that though.
Oh crap. I apologize to POF cause I had some friends over last night and showed them this site cause they've had a few dating problems too. We went back into the pool or so I thought as obviously one of them stayed and typed that. Hope you understand. Gotta find out what the heck is wrong with he/she???? | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 3:58:14 PM | | ^^^^^^No biggie. Was just confused because it didn't make any sense. I did live in Louisville for 8 years though. Thought it may have been somone who recognized me and was having a little fun with me. LOL | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 4:22:41 PM | I can see he is dying to get my phone number. > abc6587
I think he's got your number.
Best wishes - Soul Union. | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 4:30:40 PM | | MSTRKRFT - I am with you on this one. If she was "all that" and he was a hunk (of course in her story he would be like a prince charming). then sweat or no sweat (which I am sure he was also) things would of worked out differently but then there wouldn't be any kind of complaining would there | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 6:22:47 PM | | OP....don't worry...the guy was guy...if he'd had any real interest...sweaty or not....he would have been more accommodating, and at least asked for your number....I would have. | |
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Durken
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Joined: 5/8/2008
Msg: 161 | |
| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 6:38:24 PM | We're respectful because we were brought up by respectful parents. Players want dogs cause they have nothing else better to offer us. Our respectful kids will always make the money and have the good honeys      | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/6/2008 7:16:39 PM | | That goes to show you, you snooze you lose. I'm sure he wanted your phone number just as much as you actually wanted to give it to him, but why don't you try being more receptive next time with your demeanor because the opportunity won't present itself again. Sounds like something I would do. If she was really interested, I'd be thinking, then the opportunity to follow through with at least a number close would present itself. Otherwise, adios chickita. | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 6/8/2008 9:55:19 AM | OK, I went cycling... barely made it up a long, steep hill and sat down on the ridge to catch some breath. There comes a gorgeous looking guy biking fast up that hill, effortlessly... I am sitting there, panting, thinking that, in an ideal world, he'll strike a conversation. Sure enough, he stops, asks me if I am OK, I say yes, compliment him for his biking skills, and we chat for a while. Problem is, I've just biked 8 miles and I am all sweaty, so I am giving him mixed signals. He is sensitive to the signals like a barometer, I can see he is dying to get my phone number, but eventually I get totally embarrassed by the whole situation, touch the bike's handle bar to pull away, and immediately he wishes me a good day and disappears, and I can see he does so with regret. Within seconds, I turn around and chase him downhill so fast that I don't know how I did not break my neck, and he is nowhere to be found. So now I am going to bike this trail every day like an idiot I am.
Question... why? I've been to countries where you can't get rid of a guy for the life of yours; OF COURSE I am giving mixed signals, I am a woman for heaven's sake... why did he go away?
REPLY: You shouldnt have gave him mixed signals. If you really liked him you should have make it very clear. Guys get tired of getting rejected so many in doubt wont make a move unless the woman smiles a lot and shows she is interested. Next time discard the things that were going through your head that gave him the mixed signals and flirt!
On the other hand if he was a really good looking guy. He probably already had a hot babe that he was commited to so he didnt want to cheat. You have to repect him for that. Either way sometimes we just miss. So forgive yourself and move on. And know exactly what to do next time. | |
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| Why are men so darn... respectful?
Posted: 7/21/2008 9:25:19 PM | I have read a lot of posts, in response to this OP, from men who have had horrible experiences with our culture. It’s true, that the threat of “sexual harassment” hangs over many modern mens’ heads like a horrible ghost, haunting every interaction they have.
American society went crazy at some point in the last few decades. A bizarre (and unintentional) off-shoot of the feminist movement is that men aren’t sure what they are and aren’t allowed to do when it comes to women. Many men are convinced they’re only a breath away from getting a drink thrown in their face being perceived as the villain from an episode of “Law and Order: Special Victims Unit.” Nearly every TV show and movie in our culture tries to paint every sexual advance as immoral, unwanted and criminal.
Most men do not want to be immoral or criminal, so we grow up focusing on NOT being evil, lecherous losers, like the characters on TV, the trouble is we don’t know what we ARE supposed to do. So men often freeze up and run away when they meet a pretty girl, especially if they get mixed signals.
Well men, I feel your pain. I suffered from this problem worse than most. I was so lonely and confused in high school that I tried to kill myself (I really did). I really could not understand how I could ever get a girlfriend or make friends, and I was so afraid of being labeled “creepy” by our culture that I was too scared to hit on any girls.
To the men who’ve grown up in this situation, I say to you: it’s not your fault, you are victims, society has played a cruel joke on you and you have a right to be angry.
… But having said that, I have an important question to ask you:
Do you want to stay a victim all your life?
While it’s true that our culture has screwed you up, and that it’s not your fault, it’s also true that you have the power to save yourself. Furthermore you are only one who has the power to save you. No one else can do it for you.
It is possible to LEARN, by trail and error, what you are and aren’t allowed to do socially. It is possible to learn how to make more friends and to successfully pick-up women. I believe there was a lot of frustration in the posts by many men on this forum, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You can be the guy who gets laid all the time, if you want to. You can be the guy who understands women.
Instead of complaining about how women “always send mixed signals” on an internet discussion group, go out and meet some women! Accept that nearly everything TV has taught you about what women want is a lie. Try new things, experiment! Accept that not everything you try will work, but everything can be learned from.
To the people who told the OP that she should have just given him her number I have some sad news for you: women like it when a guy makes the first move. Confidence is sexy. If a woman actually does give him her number... bravo! Good for her! But most women are just too shy to do that, if we spend our lives waiting for the girls to spontaneously throw numbers at us, we will have a long and lonely wait.
To all those guys who posted things blaming the OP, I have a question: How many girls numbers have you asked for in the last month? If the answer is zero then you have no right to complain.
And when you do talk to a woman, remind yourself that she is not the one making all the problems in society and on TV. It’s true our culture has messed up the way men and women relate, it’s true men have been taught to fear sexual harassment charges or merely being judged as “creepy,” but that is not the fault of the individual woman you are talking to. Do not blame her.
There are TONS of books on the subject of how men can interact with women in a respectful, successful way. It is pretty easy to respect a girl and also have sex with her once you know how. I won’t post any titles here, because I’m not a commercial, but just do a google search.
In short, to the dozens (if not hundreds) of men who posted complaints about women sending mixed signals, and paranoia about sexual harassment laws, you are absolutely right. My heart bleeds for. But, now that you’ve complained, did complaining really help anything? Ask yourself if you want to just keep complaining all your life or if you want to step up, man up, and make your life better. You do have the power to escape this cycle. | |
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