| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 7:12:18 AM | Older men usually have better taste in clothes. They usually know how to treat a woman like a lady and don't mind being old-fashioned in the least. They are beyond the stage of having to 'prove' themselves as men with silly courageous, yet useless, acts. They usually grow up at around 45. Beware of the non and never-been marrieds after the age of 50 (40 if they still live with mummy) .  | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:20:44 AM | My first question would be...how old is older? Your 23, so do you mean older as in 28, 35, 40,45?
Not all men are the same. That is like a man saying all women under 25 are idiots & airheads. It's just not true!
If your attracted to the looks of an older man then you will find one you click with. If your looking at older men to fix some kind of dating problem then it will never happen.
Age is a number. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:38:42 AM | | After a person reaches their late 20s or early 30s, age has nothing to do with maturity. There are some 30 yr old men who are more mature than some 45 yr old men. It is perfectly fine to prefer a certain age group, but don't make generalizations from a few bad experiences. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:55:11 AM | | Apparently you didn't read my post clearly because never did I say that ALL older men are like my last date, I clearly said that it changed my perspective and I no longer thought dating an older man would make a difference. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:57:48 AM |
Can you expalin this comment?
Could it be that he wouldn't get in a fight over you at the local pub?
Maybe he's not a coward, just smart enough to walk away.
That was a really stupid thing to say about the whole pub thing, but anyways, he lied about being married. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:00:29 AM |
Yet another post of someone projecting their limited experience into a generalization of everyone and everything. A few things.... you dated one older guy and he wasn't for you, so you have now sworn off all older guys. Makes sense. So, since you have had that one bad experience, you are now announcing it on a public forum as a way of what? Warning other women to never date an older guy because of your extensive research and experience with 1 man? Makes sense again.
I love these generalizations, they are awesome. Keep them coming, we would all like to keep learning from your extensive experience.
How about just accepting your experience as, at most, an experience that just isn't for you and move on? Or better yet, perhaps it was an isolated incident that basically says that one person was not for you and perhaps there are a number of other potential men, younger, the same or older than you that are possible mates? Who knows? But you're probably right, swear off all older men and never give them a chance. Makes sense.
This forum is specifically to discuss dating experiences, or didn't you read? I used this forum for that specific person and like others who replied, you clearly didn't read my post because never once did I mention never dating an older man again or mention all older men being the same. I simply explained that I realized that I was about older men all having it together like I had thought. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:03:19 AM | Just are there are good and bad in all parts of society, age isn't any difference.
Like all human behaviour in life, it really depends on the individual.
I don't think it helps making any type of judgement on one from a group age
or gender.
Good luck with whoever you date and of whatever age. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:03:21 AM |
Why was he a coward? Because he decided he didn't want to deal with the fact you are a pregnant woman who is not yet divorced from her husband maybe? That wouldn't make him a coward...it would make him very sensible!
I make it clear to everyone about my situation, I have nothing to hide. He decided I was worth persuing anyhow, but failed to mention that he had a family already, that is what made him a coward honey. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:04:13 AM | Yikes chicky...first off, you cannot generalize a group just because you had one "bad" experience....that is shallow and really quite ignorant of you to do so, but at least you are not gong to let age get in your way.
wow...you are 5 months pregnant..... good luck. | |
|
| |
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:10:14 AM | I am 28,
good job, house and a dog
very stable life....
All my friends are the same,
we all act or at least try to act very mature...
but i'll tell you what...we still feel like 19
and sometimes act like 19...
So, I'd imagine, we will feel like 30 when we hit 40...
there's about a 10 year gap, between our real and mental age....
FYI.... | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:11:08 AM | | GEEZUS, why are you bringing up the fact of my being pregnant? That has nothing to do with my posting about my dating experience. Unlike a lot of you on here, I have no shame and I make it clear about my situation in my profile for all to see that I don't suprise anybody. If they persue me anyhow, I assume they are willing to accept me in my situation. And I don't think being pregnant should limit me either, but I do realize that dating will be scarce as oppose to not being pregnant. Smitten, doll, you didn't read my post clearly otherwise you would have noticed that I never mentioned anything about all older men being the same or that I will never date older men again. I simply posted on a forum for "dating experiences" about my "dating experience." Think about it, it makes sense if you do. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:28:36 AM | OP, you were hurt by his dishonesty about being married, that's understandable.
I've found that some twenty-somethings aren't where it's at for me simply because I have kids and our life experiences are different because of them and the age difference.
That doesn't mean I'd write off someone in that age group, everyone deserves a chance, older, younger, kids, not, whatever. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 11:43:43 AM | no I didn't...but your title says: Dating older man is NOT going to solve you dating issues.
you only had ONE experience with an older man. Younger men can lie as well...I am saying don't generalize a whole age group because of one bad experience. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:15:52 PM | I don't think the title is an unfair generalisation - it does not say "older men are immature", she's just pointing out that women out there who deliberately seek older men and/or refuse to date younger ones purely on the basis that an older man is going to be more mature, are following a flawed belief because there are plenty of mature younger guys and plenty of immature older ones.
The correlation between age and maturity just isn't that strong... | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:37:39 PM | Age has little to do with maturity or chemistry.
Love is hard enough to find without placing additional arbitrary restrictions.
Perhaps being beauiful allows you to limit your options. I jsut want to find that one person who gets me, likes me for who I am and vice versa. . . I guess I just thought that was the most important part of life? | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:38:41 PM | As a younger man I was very tolerant - you'd think as you get older you get more 'patient' but I haven't - I put up with less and less BS these days mainly because I realise life is too short and problem people are problems until you leave them.
For example if you're with someone who regards you as a loser you can spend a decade trying to make yourself a winner in their eyes, and fail, and then discover the real trick is to just leave the person who makes you feel like a loser. I've learned to do this faster and faster and now I'm surrounded only by people who hold me in high regard and ask me my opinion on all kinds of things (and find my advice works every time).
I've spent years trying to deal with nightmare scenarios in a 'brave' way whilst being put down by the people I've been trying to 'help'. I made a great punchbag.
OP dating anyone is not going to solve any issues. Dating isn't supposed to be about that. As soon as you regard anothe person as a 'problem solver' you're actually looking for someone to use. Once such a person has fulfilled their 'use' it's game-over and if they refuse to be 'useful' and you're frustrated about it it's you who hasn't quite got your head on right.
I have a lot of ladies ask 'do you have a car?' as their first question when I go speed dating and I watch their faces drop as I say 'no'. Well, I don't want to get together with a woman like that anyway. So whatever purpose you had in mind for said older man maybe he just didn't want that kind of relationship? No doubt I'm not 'good enough' in the eyes of those ladies because I can't scoot them about the country quickly.
I have a friend in his 40's who got it together with a colleague in her mid-30's, both professionals. When they first got together he thought she was single and after falling for her she reveals she's got an ex-b/f who won't leave her alone and she wants him to go sort the guy out for her. She's had this nutter threatening her b/f's and threatening to kill them for years and she wants him to sort him out. End of relationship, and a very confusing and messy end too because the friend really loves her.
Maybe us oldies realise we need to get out when that light at the end of the tunnel turns out to be an oncoming train. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:48:51 PM | He turned out to be the biggest coward I'd ever met and he was certainly not anymore of a man than the men I dated who were my age.
Someone got burned. Perhaps your expectations of him was different than who he really was.
Good post, solar, btw. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 1:03:10 PM | | I agree 100% with the OP. Dating older men is not going to solve dating issues. This is yet another "issue" that any man could have told a woman had she just asked. A man is a man is man. 63 or 23, so what? Some people have pointed out that she's only had one encounter with an old man. But I think that's precisely her point. Not all older men are "it". There are a lot of women who have this illusion of the older (or younger) man. Glad to see this testimony. | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 1:11:09 PM | | what are you looking for?you are 5 months pregnant,its a fact and it will be brought up,and dating on this site.and please,i am not trying to be mean,just would like to know a little more.what happened to the daddy?are you dating,looking to make a family,or trying to find a friend?most men young and old would be scared off by a pregnant women.thats just they way it is.maybe you should wait until the baby is born,and then after things settle,date.we all want to be happy,and you may even be a littler afraid doing this on your own.but,don't you want to know a guy and see how he is with your child before you hook up?and what are you doing smoking? | |
|
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 1:13:49 PM | You need to date someone that is on the same maturity level as you are. This might mean an older man or a younger man.
I am 49....I have found that most the womenI prefer to be with are my age or older. However, that doesn't mean that I wouldn't be happy with someone younger. The key is to find someone on your level. | |
|
| |
| |
| |
| Dating older men is NOT going to solve your dating issues
Posted: 5/26/2008 6:38:48 PM | ~ Cndn Girl ~ Said
OE - Ok... I just read the comment before mine. If this guy got out JUST in the nick of time and if dating a preg woman who is separated is SO bad then why was he in there in the first place? Seems OP is very upfront and forward about her situation... if a guy thinks this is going to be a bad thing maybe he shouldn't have pursued her or if she initiated it, then they should have declined her in the FIRST place!!!!
Cndn Girl. You will not get any argument out of me about this one. Your right. He was stupid for even trying to get something started with a woman who is four months pregnant (by her husband i hope) and just separated. That is one situation that any man with a brain in his head will stay out of until he knows for sure that every thing is settled. The OP didn't make her post clear in the beginning. If she had she might not have gotten the responses that she got. More than likely the guy saw a pregnant woman that he thought would be a easy lay. But, He got caught first. Easy. But, That doesn't mean we all are pond scum. | |
|
Home
login 
