| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 8:57:24 PM | Aero....... it happens all the time to both sexes. There are a zillion posts on here about it.
Now... the only advice I would suggest is....... When you meet and want to see a woman again, CALL her. Don't email, don't IM... those are cheesy once you have met.
I agree with Thomahawk.... too many people rely on the computer to communicate. Once you meet in person, it should go to real life from there. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:00:12 PM | Well, I would give her a bit more time to connect with you again. There could be a number of reasons why she isn't responding.
Don't rush and keep things in perspective for yourself right now. Best of luck to you! | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:18:16 PM |
Someone gave me some really good advice that I will share with you..." try not to take things seriously, until you are sure that person is serious about you."
And what if that person is also not taking things seriously until they are sure that you are serious about them? | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:26:34 PM | | Just a shot in the dark, OP, if you wrote down your contact info with as many typos as your post, she may have been fruitlessly trying to reach you for days. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:30:08 PM |
so i would like to hear what u think espically from the ladies out there, you wonder why guys get frustarted on stuff like this.
I give people a chance to reply - phone and email. If they don't, then I let go of my hopes or expectations or anticipations. It's not a good start, cause it isn't the way I like to be treated. So, at least 1 lesson is that this is how this person treats people.
I understand the temptation to apply this to all women, but not all women are like this. Just have to meet a lot to find the ones who aren't.
Just keep looking - as frustrating as it certainly is.
Gandi. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:31:47 PM | OP....it has nothing to do with being a woman. Men do the same thing.
I do believe in honesty. If the chemistry isn't there or if you just don't have enough in common... why not say so? We're adults and should be able to voice what we're feeling. But, some people are cowards... regardless of gender.
I've had the same thing happen. I've had men tell me they never had such a good time on a first date, then I won't hear from them again. Makes you wonder what happened. I would like to know.... it can help you make better decisions the next time. But, in a "virtual" world, people can talk to and make dates with multiple people, so they've lost the ability to be respectful or forget there is such a thing as common courtesy.
I don't question that kind of behavior anymore. If someone is that rude, I wouldn't want them in my life anyway.
Sharzi | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:33:24 PM |
i dont understand women sometimes
Thats ok, my love, Im a woman and Ill never understand women as long as I live. A lot of them have made it their lifes work to dork things up for the rest of us. Its falls to you intrepid guys to sort through all the chaff to get to the wheat, which I know can be pretty thankless most times. What this woman did was wrong and unless you told her you have a stack of human female hides you tanned yourself stored in your basement or have a budding interest in roadkill cuisine, she should have had the manners to tell you if she didnt feel you two were going to work out. Frustrating, of course, but unfortunately youre going to come across some substandard examples of our species [which goes both ways, it should go without saying]. Keep sorting, shes there somewhere!
Sister | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:49:32 PM | | lol its not just women that do this but men too. Some people just find its too hard to say "Your nice but your just not for me sorry, good luck with your search" | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:10:39 AM | | trust me..it IS a brush-off..women make up their minds within 26 seconds of meeting you.For some reason, i have yet to understand...they are 'chicken' to tell us the real truth. She probably gave you some subliminal hints during your lunch date, that you did not pick up on.When a woman is interested in a guy, she'll do all kinds of things to make sure he knows she's interested..touch him on the arm..sit and face him directly..ask him alot of questions..look into his eyes..etc..In my opinion, let them chase you, if its meant to be..it will be. In this 26 seconds, chemistry has to happen, otherwise you'll lose her.Sad to say, but all your hard work & time & effort has gone to waste.This is a lost cause. I know its not easy but move on asap. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 4:20:07 AM | i read your post and thought, ahhh, she's not into you after meeting in person and it's sounds like she did a runner instead of telling you truthfully she's not attracted to you. (she's a coward to not just tell you either in person or by email when she got home, if you ask me, but some people are like that.)
and then i read this you posted a little later -
she was being all naughty with me on the computer last night. i didnt go to far with it cause im trying to be a gentleman and do the right thing. but what do when she made the first move. and suddenly it's all even clearer - now we have the combination of embarrassement from being sexually flirting the night before, but not attracted in person - so she's definitely done a runner. sorry.
personally, i don't IM at all because it so often does turn sexual and i don't think you really meet someone until you really meet them (: (in person) and i don't want to be sexually flirting with someone i'm never going to be sexual with....or even know if i'm attracted to them like that - it just sort of seems like a waste (and a wind-up:).
so, perhaps to prevent this from happening in the future - i know some have asked me on that first meeting (usually coffee) whether i think i'd like to meet again? it's so simple and so easy to say yes or no to - i find. and it keeps everyone knowing what's gonna happen when we part. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 4:46:36 AM | Aeroforce, don't feel like you're the only one out here who goes through this sort of thing.
I have many stories I could share with you from personal experiences. Being the women have so many options on these sites and outside of these sites maybe she decided to go with someone else. Maybe she felt like you 2 weren't good for each other or compatible. I'm using logic here to explain why she probably blew you off. It sounds that way to me buddy, but keep reading.
I can't give you real logic when it comes to women and why they do what they do when it comes to us and dating. It's usually how the woman wants it in my opinion because we don't really get to decide what happens. I am used to a woman telling me she is interested in me but not really act like she is even after we go out together. It's as if I'm made to be the bad guy if I get annoyed about being ignored (After we've already started dating and have been talking on the phone and online for more than a week). I guess you can say it's impossible to explain this type of behavior on the lady you are talking about. I say move on and find someone else to meet, no point in wasting mind space on this one!
Enjoy your day   | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 4:55:54 AM | hi all.i have this expensive ebook (David DeAngelo -double your dating)which i have finished with.if anyone would like to buy it off me,for cheap,then message me (its more useful to men). | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 5:02:26 AM | Think this one is a no boner - she didnt like what she saw when she met you, was trying to let you down gently.
Edit: oh god yes, if you have already met, to go back to messages is all wrong, it gives out the message you are still looking for something better. Once on the phone never go back. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 5:37:53 AM | Try not to sweat it..I know that's hard when you like someone. But she's entitled to take her time, entitled to be busy, even entitled to change her mind! Now, if she's being intentionally rude, that's another thing but I don't think you know enough to say that.
What this tells me about you though is that you're way too eager and anxious for this stage of the "game" - just relax and see where it goes. Even in the worst case you haven't invested that much so you should be able to move on easily...if not, you're too thin skinned to be dating online. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 5:46:16 AM | you also have to remember, women think a different way and they look at much more than what a man sees or is focus on.
And we're all different. I think the worrst thing to do ever, is to try and figure everyone out. But as you get to know someone, often, the more you can understand them. But you can never know fully whats going on inside someone. That is unless they share it with you. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 5:50:54 AM | | I'm going to echo the others here and tell you that it certainly happens to both genders. I also agree with sticking to the phone once you've met in person. I'd much rather talk in real time. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 5:58:50 AM | Sam well its like this :- when men stop playing games, life tends to settle down you can throw away the directory and talk to one another, see its easy when you know how. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 6:23:05 AM | | I have had the same experience from the woman's point of view and for me the chemistry just wasn't there. We had really clicked on the phone and emails but when we met it just wasn't meant to be. Who knows, maybe she had a fantastic date with someone right before she met you and that person was on her mind that day. Hard to compete with uh. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 7:26:52 AM | Bad breath, shabby clothes, or crappy car. That's why she's not into you anymore. I am only partly kidding about that. Some people are extremely shallow and materialistic.
I really think people should send a note to those they have been getting to know, to let them know WHY they're not interested. It's simple courtesy (which seems to be badly lacking in this process, from my experience). If you are SO afraid of a nasty reply, then block them after sending the explanation.
I have been trying this online dating thing for several months now, and what has struck me the most is the bad manners people have. People have feelings, so treat them with some respect. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 7:35:01 AM | Internet dating works best if compartmentalized. Meaning each conversation, each e-mail exchange, each IM, each meeting is an entity in itself.
If you enjoy each thing for what it is and never expect to see and/or talk to that person again after it, you'll be way less frustrated. Wondering what's happening next (even if that person's telling you about it) will kill you.
Express your interest if there is any, move on and don't expect anything, and keep talking to/dating others until something materializes that goes beyond the usual crap. Look at each meeting as a means of meeting someone new and learning about them and a chance to enjoy that time ONLY.
That's how I do it. | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 7:38:17 AM | | is it so difficult to figure out she did not like something about how you looked, behaved, spoken, walked, sounded etc? | |
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| i dont understand women sometimes
Posted: 5/26/2008 7:48:11 AM | | i usually flush 'em out..for personal reasons i wanna know the 'why' part. For hints here's what i do and it works 95% of the time. Call block your number , if she accepts it, you're in..however she will probably say 'i have to unload groceries..or i just stepped outta the shower..etc..'can i call u back'?? DON"T let her off the hook..say this will only take a minute..'Why did you sooo disrespect me and just blow me off'?? They will prolly give some lame-azz excuse..but at least you got thru..(u may also use a number she's not familar with...(a friends' cell..your fax line...etc.) Trust me it works.I leave her with the thoughts that she was pretty shitty for doin' what she did and how she did it but women are wuzzies..when it comes to saying..'hey i'm just not into u'..etc..deal with it..and move on.As i stated before, believe it or not..it just takes 26 seconds to make up her mind..and she might just wanna 'play the field' at this time in her life..give her the room and kick her to the curb.For the future, find out when her last serious relationship was and how long it lasted..this will tell you where her head is at..past relationships are a good info for the future. | |
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