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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 8:32:12 AM | Wow... there's some pretty deep stuff going on here...
I'd add to it... but it's Monday... and I don't do deep on a Monday. 
Let me just say, that this site, and the people here (wonderful ones like Red, and oldsoul, and laughinglibra, or the not so wonderful) have all had an impact on me.
Naturally, the impact of those wonderful people are cherished and appreciated. Offers of friendship and more (*snuggles libra*) are all wonderful. And you incredible ladies have really brightened my day on many an occaision. And some of you do so daily. And I truly appreciate that.
I count you among my dearest of friends. And I cherish all the time we spend chatting together. All the wonderful advice you give. The way you help me examine myself and my actions. And I'm happy when I can be doing something to help you.
As for the not so greats... well, it's always good to have a laugh at how stupid some people can be. 
But I have made wonderful friends here. And even had some incredible relationships start because of this site.
And every one of you I talk to, every one I meet, is definitely a blessing. You've all enriched my life in ways I can't even describe.
And you ladies... well... what can I say? You're all truly incredible. Beautiful inside and out, brilliant, caring, funny, and definitely on my list for my cuddle tour. ;)
*Ahem*
Yeah, so... you know... thanks and stuff.
*Cannonballs into the water* | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:14:56 AM | Thanks to everyone who posted.
I cannot even begin to respond to each individual message... am still processing them. Just few brief comments:
Every kind gesture or word of kindness freely given to someone has an impact on that person's life.
That's precisely what I am talking about. Here's another story of mine (I am breaking my own rule of not posting personal stuff here, but the heck with it.):
Twelve years ago I moved to this country. I came to attend school. I have never even been to the US prior to that.
The flight to Los Angeles was long, exciting but also terrifying. Knowing that I won't see my family for at least nine months was saddening and I cried for a long time. Once I managed to get over that I realized that I was scared. I had no idea what awaits me, I was scared of the new place, new school, classes in English, people who were bound to be so different from the people I knew. I was overwhelmed by fear... scared sh1tless, to put it nicely.
As we finally approached LA, and flew over that vast city I thought of the abys that I will imminently fall into, all alone. I could hardly breathe at that point.
Sitting next to me was a young Mexican family; mom, dad and a little 2 year old girl. We did not talk during the flight, I was wrapped in my own emotions and they slept for the most part. They woke up and started getting ready for landing. The little girl noticed me and started talking to me... In Spanish, of course...I had no idea what she was saying. Then, she looked me and smiled, she extended her little arm to me and in her palm was a candy... a fruity kind...newer saw it before...
Suddenly, I felt at peace with myself. It seemed as though this little girl is a face of my new world, the new life that awaits me... smiling at me, reassuring me that everything will be all right.
The week after arriving to LA was probably among the top 3 most difficult times in my life. I won't go into details here. Suffice to say that several times I felt that I should just head back to the airport and return home, that this was too much for me to handle. But, each time that thought entered my mind I'd see the little girl smiling at me, I'd look at the candy she gave me and I knew that I will survive.
The ripple effect of a random act of kindness.
I still have that candy... and I can still see her smile.
And sometimes the most gentle of touches will be forever moving forward............................
You know it, bullielover62... The effect that your friend had is still with you, in each thing that you do... not only when you think of her...May she rest in peace.
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:24:22 AM | I wrote something last night for this thread, and opened it today to post it. I’m lost for words. Really. Every expression of gratitude and thanks I think of (which is bigger than the sky BTW) is sounding so woefully inadequate and possibly arrogant to my ears – that I can’t say anything at all. And that seems so wrong. So I will settle on a simple thank you – and hope that you can hear the love and gratitude and respect that is there.
I didn’t expect this when I began to dabble in the fora. I didn’t expect so many very special people would touch my life, and in the touching of it, alter me. I didn’t expect to find friends here. I didn’t expect that having someone like Red, who I respect so much, be moved by a post would affect me so deeply. And talk about freakish ripples Red, I’d lost track of that thread, couldn’t remember the title of it and it is special to me because my sweetie made one of his rare posts in it. And today, linking to it, I was jolted to realize he and I joined on the exact same day… would we have met if one of us was busy that day? Speaking of him, I surely didn’t expect to have my notions of what is possible in relating be tossed on its’ ear by Rune and crazylilting and Funny Girl.
Oh that FG, who persists in making me sit still, squirming madly, and take all of her embarrassing compliments. Dayum, I feel like Sally Fields at the Academy Awards. Thank you FG, you’re still teaching me. I’m stunned. I didn’t know the effect our conversations were having in your life but I knew the effect they were having in mine. Every time we discussed something it forced me to look at it in my own life. Seeing the woman that is FG made me sit back on my heels and think “I want that”… I want to be the woman who refused to be stopped by her stuff, who courageously went to the places that scared her, who fearlessly expressed herself and, perhaps most of all, who put things in action in her life. See, at the time I was stopped. The conversations WE had kick started me, got me out of the stands and back in the game. Who should be thanking whom here? Hmmm?
Sheesh this thread is going in the toilet. Which leads ever so nicely to the ripple I intended to post this morning…
Once upon a time, about a zillion lifetimes ago, I volunteered at a week long symposium. The deal was you’d be able to hear parts of the seminars for free in exchange for helping them out.
I was fired the first day from a volunteer job because I didn’t clean the washrooms after the breaks with the right attitude.
I fumed. I fumed over the indignity of being fired. I fumed over the indignity of being fired from a volunteer job. I fumed over the indignity of being fired over a toilet and my lack of sufficiently appropriate toilet attitude. I fumed over their expectations – I cleaned the stupid washrooms and didn’t outwardly complain so how DARE they fire ME because I wasn’t perky Miss Sunshine oh gosh, thank you for giving me the opportunity to clean the friggin toilets. I fumed over who do they think they are? I fumed over who do they think I am? I fumed about missing those dayum seminars. It made for a couple of interesting days, lol.
Then they called me to come back in. Oh?
What to do with that? Do I tell them to stick their heads in a perfectly clean toilet bowl and flush? Several times. Do I promise to do better? Do I say I’ll come back but only if I don’t do toilets?
I went back, still not sure what I was going to say and I listened to them. I heard their point about being in service to people; to their view, the seminar experience went beyond the speakers. I heard their point about it isn’t enough to just do a job, that yes, your attitude about it makes a difference. I heard their point about how attitude is a choice. I heard their point on who do you say you are?
I decided I was not a person who got stopped by a toilet bowl.
I don’t remember the content from any of those seminars but the ripples from that toilet bowl continue through my life. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:25:20 AM |
(I am breaking my own rule of not posting personal stuff here, but the heck with it.):
Yeah Red... I broke mine too.... and did it when I realized that sometimes putting your heart and soul on the line, if for nothing but to pass on something important.... WILL touch someone's life......
For me, the thought of never talking to my friend again has me thinking how important it is
to take each and every moment and cherish it.... make the most of it.
We're all gonna pass ripples of negativity on, that's the human condition, but when we're
aware and in the present, we can knowingly pass on beauty.
Thanks for bringing this post to us Red. bullie loves ya.  | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:47:07 AM |
But having children is not necessary to leave your footprint or your essence behind IMO.
So true oldsoul. I struggled with that for years because I dont have any children. I used to feel like I didn't leave my mark, and would die someday without contributing to society or having a purpose in life. I no longer feel that way now though, and know that I HAVE in fact left my mark in many other ways. Although all of them werent positive ones, I would like to think that most were.
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:23:24 AM | Red? You know the day you told me that maybe I do need to cry over what I had "lost" in that scenario I was in a couple of months ago? And you told me I might feel better? Because I told you I had not shed one tear about it, yet I felt so bad?
Well, I cried about it, a long time, and today I do feel much better. One of YOUR "Ripple Effects", thank you. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:29:42 AM | ^^^ Thank you... I am so glad to hear that you feeling better.
This thread is the ripple effect of the conversations that I had with Hearding Cats (*blows a kiss to HC*).
I recently stumbled on the video... inspirational type thing... and tho I am personally not religious I found it very calming... it reminded me of HC and helped me frame the original post...
If you want to see it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLMj6T0VNtY
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 11:48:04 AM | I don't think I've ever been a pebble, which would seem to be the ultimate source of the ripples, but just a ripple, fed by another ripple, feeding others, a link in a chain that is far more complicated that ripples on a 2 dimensional surface.
There are people whose posts here resonate with me. The one whose posts affect me the most is the man sitting 3ft away from me right now. I don't post with the intention of influencing, creating ripples, but selfishly, because expressing my thoughts in writing has been something that has always felt good and brought me clarity and relief.
Sometimes the biggest influences in our lives who help us learn positive lessons are not good and insightful people like itsMargo, on whose wavelength I often seem to be too, but people who are at odds from ourselves, people who even mean us and others harm, people with no good intention at all can lead to revelations that set people free.
When any of us expresses any thought, all we are really doing is passing something on. When something someone says seems to resonate or make things clear to us, I think it is because in our heart we already understood it, but had not put it into words or got past our own filters to recognise it clearly.
What I value about PoF is the way in which it acts as a growing repository of understanding. If you look at the posts of years ago and compare them with the posts of today, it seems to me that the collective knowledge and understanding found here has grown and matured. We all contribute to this: some by asking questions, some by outlining problems, some by sharing experiences, some by answering with personal beliefs and theories and others by questioning, challenging, rewording, affirming these theories. Regarded as an entity of which we are all part, the forums is learning according to the model of the learning cycle identified by Kolb (Concrete Experience, Reflection, Abstract Conceptualisation, Active Experimentation). We all have roles to play and contributions to make in this cycle and I wouldn't want to belittle the contribution that anyone makes to this. People, individuals will come and go and you will see that understanding does gradually become communal, so that an understanding that seemed a revelation a year ago by one person is something that others are now explaining and passing on. The experiences and 'mistakes' of many unfortunate people, shared here are as valuable to the process as the ability to spot patterns and offer insight.
Looking to the one who had the inspiration or insight and putting them on a pedestal is natural but I think it misses the fact that we had to know they were right already in order for their voice to be heard. Something crazylilting observed was that people have a strong tendency to set people up as being oracles or gurus from whom they can seek solutions or direction and this holds them back from being the expert on their own life as we all are. When we find someone on the same wavelength as us, their thoughts do add strength and clarity to ours and I value that as much as anyone, but I think it's a mistake to see them as being a great guru just because they happen to be able to say things in ways that enables your brain to understand. And it's a mistake to undervalue, as itsMargo said, the people with whom we have less pleasant encounters, in terms of what we can learn from them, even if the learning takes much longer to penetrate our defences. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:52:09 PM | Oh thank you rune3 you put in words what i was feeling and thinking but simply couldn't get out. Some times we want to make a difference so we look for that feedback to let us know that we are in some way making a difference. But as Mother Theresa said "In this life we cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love. "
It is difficult knowing that our negative impact of living will outweigh the good we will leave behind but again Mother Theresa says "We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop."
At the end of the day the forums like rune3 says are like a collective spiral of hands being held out on our journey of self discovery and how we fit into the world around us and relate. A part of a counselling course i once took there was a book we were meant to read on self actualization. Although the idea at the time was impact full what i still remember to this day is the cover of the book. It had this spiral of people that were like glowing lights each reaching up to the next person and holding out the hand to the one just inches below them.
The power of self actualization isn't in attaining some level of wisdom or being able to help a lot of people but what is important is the two hands that are held out in the journey for those are the relationships we have with the world around us. We could never understand someone who is self actualized any more then they would be able to convey what it is like unless we are inches away from them in the spiral and we can never advance up the spiral if we don't hold out our hand to those that are just inches away from us. Imagine it like a spring that is formed from the pressure below us if we let go of the and below then the whole spiral simply falls to pieces.
POF is much like this in my opinion. Everyone offering up their prospective and little insights are made along the way with little pieces here and there The pebble who knows, i am the rain drop and it is all the responsibility i can handle. Even if people don't understand everything we say, somewhere someone does understand and has an aha! moment. When i did group work I used to thrive on those. When participants eyes and hearts lit up mine would also, its a feeling i'll never forget. I met my special someone here on the forums and to me it is like our hands are clasped and we feed off each other like the spiral on the cover of that book. Some times i reach out to her and some times she reaches out to me, some times we reach out to the collective finding the little pieces here and there and we hold our hands out for any one else who finds a small piece in what we say. But we didn't invent our words nor has anyone else, we don't own our words they are everyone's words already. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/26/2008 1:23:14 PM |
Sometimes the biggest influences in our lives who help us learn positive lessons are not good and insightful people like itsMargo, on whose wavelength I often seem to be too, but people who are at odds from ourselves, people who even mean us and others harm, people with no good intention at all can lead to revelations that set people free.
Very well said rune3. I know in my case they are the ones who have taught me the most....or I should say, because of my dealings with them, I was more open to changes in myself, in order to deal with these types of people. Some of them are family, some are people at work, and some I truly loved.
Regardless of whether I have an affect on anyone remains to be seen...I know I will have an effect on my children, good or bad. I would hope that the time I take in that split second to let someone ahead of me in the grocery line, or the person I let cross the street will thing "gee that was nice", but I never do it for that reason. I do it simply because that is who I am. If it gets passed along to another person, or ripple, than all the better. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/27/2008 4:25:57 PM | clasact ~ wonder what it is about crying ~?
I rarly ever cry ~ just cloud up ~ but there is something that happens with even that, ~ an "almost" cry,
We have a beautiful National Cementry between Dallas and Ft Wo. ~ Late Memorial Day ~ myself and a friend went and looked around, just to pay respect~ This year, I chose to go alone ~ as I walked through the rows and rows of graves stones, reading the names, ~ the campains ~ accomidation and awards . ~ "solider, father and husband, ~ "till we met again" ~ " at peace" ~ loyal husband" ~ 1924-2006, 1949-2006, Korea, Viet Nam, WWII, Desert Strom ~
All of a sudden ~ something happen and I clouded up ~ I fought it back ~ I felt better from the experience.
Must be nice to really cry ~ dance | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/27/2008 4:48:18 PM | neat story dance.
My story about the Ripple Effect in my life is a little bit different it is about the choices that are made.
back at Christmas 1991 I met up with an old school chum.. he was divorced and lived in another state and we began a very tumultuous realtionship.. that is it was tumultuous around us with his famiy's drama. I was so in love with this guy thought he was my soul mate.. We were engaged for about six months then he decided to break it off.. and start dating someone who lived near him since I was a couple of states away.. Broke my heart.. I wanted him so badly.
The next year in 1992 I quit my job and moved to the same state that ex-fiance lived in but in a different location, in order to go to grad school. In 1996 I was diagnosed with a serious cancer.. and nearly lost my life. What saved me was my doctor who had only moved to the small town where I was living six months before my diagnosis. Ended up I had a medical mystery that was not easily solved.. he solved it.. because of a combination of things.. I was actually mis-diagnosed.. and this doctor was probably the only one in the world given my circumstances.. the nature of the true disease and his prior experience with this disease and the fact that he had studied with the world's authority on this disease. All things converged for me for him to be able to save my life. Every major cancer center in the U.S. mis-diagnosed me.. Sloan Kettering, Fred Huchison, MD Anderson, Mayo Clinic, St. Judes, Emery, Duke, LSU, University of Mississippi Medical Center, Baylor, Vanderbuilt, U. of Tennessee.. all of them missed what it actually was.
Bottom line is this.. if I had not moved to the state I am in now.. and gone to grad school I never would have met the doctor.. if I had married the "love of my life".. I would never have met the doctor..
It seems that I had an appointment with destiny when I moved here.. and that appointment saved my life.
So you never know what choices are going to be critical in our lives till time has passed. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/27/2008 4:50:49 PM | This is such a nice thread, thank you Red Cassandra for starting it.
When I drove to work a few days ago I stopped at a red light. I was singing away to the music cheering myself up while I sat in the traffic. As the lights changed a car pulled up beside me and I glanced over at the driver. He was watching me singing and he laughed and gave me a huge grin and a wave. I laughed back at him (sheer embarrassment - I can't sing to save my life, hope he couldn't hear me!!) and waved. Just that one huge smile really lifted me out of the doldrums and set me up for the day and suddenly I didn't mind all the traffic queues.
It's true what they say about a smile costing nothing but it can make someones day. I was probably a sunnier person to work with that day too
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/27/2008 5:21:06 PM | If we could keep the awareness in the forefront of our minds that we are all connected...we would remember that we are only lifted by lifting someone else....we learn by articulating our thoughts....we receive by giving.
I have spent much time lately thinking about this very subject. We may never know the influence we cast on those who cross our paths, but I believe it's important to become aware that everyone DOES have influence, and everyone has a part to play in life. Even the most solitary, or obscure, or weak will send forth ripples of influence for good or ill.
Each of us has the potential to make our world a better place....starting with ourselves.
Thanks, Red, for your post! | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/27/2008 7:27:00 PM | Wonderful thread, Red. It redeems a lot of the innate downsides of this site. It ripples bigtime.
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/29/2008 1:45:35 PM | ^^^ Thank you.
***
"I learned early in my life the power of what I would later realize was “The Ripple Effect”. Relative to the universe, we humans are not even a blip, but as cumulative droplets, over time, we change landscapes.
Both of my parents (and their parents and so on and so on) came from abusive homes. One parent abused me physically and both abused me verbally. It took years of my own willingness to learn WHY they did that and what I could do to make sure I didn’t turn that ripple into a devastating avalanche. Over time and many, many late night —cathartic — conversations I relearned how to love them. I learned that this brief experience we all have CAN and must be shared. I learned that no matter how old someone is, they are still learning until the day they die. And I learned how lonely it is to inhabit a human body.
To this day I wonder what my so-called grandfathers would think of this woman that would smirk and then … ? One grandfather was the head of the RCMP in the city I currently live in. Recognizing me as the daughter of the son of his England born war bride was too much for him when I called to tell him he was a great grandfather.. He died never having met me or his great granddaughter. The other grandfather was put in the ground with witnesses to make sure he was dead. ‘Nuff said.
Every single person on this planet lives, breathes and dies alone. No one knows what it is to be YOU. Daily, no one knows what it is to be you or to inhabit your skin. No matter how much we pray that we can share and be close to someone equally sentient, at the end of the “day”, we are alone. So… What do you do with that? What do you want to have contributed to this spec in the universe that may be nothing more than Horton’s “Who”?
Have a baby?
Cure cancer?
Prove you can make millions?
Drop a coin into the hat of that guy outside the liquor store?
Make sure you toss a penny in that strategically placed wishing well?
The coolest thing about ripples is that they are infinitely random. They may dislodge a rock that kills a duckling, or they may create an entire new bay that becomes a haven to flocks of migrating birds. The beauty of the randomness is that you can NOT act and know for sure what will happen. You just know something WILL. Something always happens.
Because of the abuse my parents went through, I went through a watered down version of their experiences as they attempted to temper their Ripple Effect. Forget that it was still bad, they tried to do better. Due to what I grew up with, I decided never to have children because I didn’t trust myself to have the strength of kindness and patience I felt would be required.
Oops. Having sex has it’s own ripple effect, eh?
Now I’d born a human. Now I had a direct reflection of me. Now I had the power to nullify every unkind word, every physical blow.
I had the power to be the first generation to bear a child that did not know what it was to be physically or emotionally subdued. Was I up to it?
Short answer is yes. I was the shore upon which some negative ripples fell and I, as a sentient being, chose to absorb them and learn.
It’s not just about creating a new human that is a better version of you.
It is about being a better human while you are granted the ability to live, breathe and interact.
It’s a random smile.
It’s a random touch.
It’s moving to the other side of the sidewalk when you KNOW the other person should.
It’s reminding yourself how lucky you are regardless of circumstance or what you see in the news of the world — It shouldn’t take Twin Towers or Katrina or a Chinese earthquake to wake you up.
It’s finding a way to volunteer.
It’s tilting your head to hear what most people can’t.
It’s opening your eyes to see what most people won’t.
It’s an open mind.
It’s a generous heart.
It’s learning to forgive.
It’s recognizing — HOLY CRAP!! — I’m happy.
I think it’s sad that with all of our knowledge most trees do more for our planet on a daily basis than we ever consider worthy of our time.
*Hug*
Denise "
I shared my thoughts about this topic with a very dear friend many a time... the ripple effect of our conversations was this thread... The ripple effect of her reading the thread was that she wanted to share her thoughts with you... I provided the space, knowing that what she has to say might touch another heart... And, the ripple will spread... outwards.
*blows a kiss to Denise*
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/29/2008 5:40:32 PM | May I join the crowd thanking you for this thread? So many negative things are said/posted here and elsewhere; it is wonderful to have this thread filled with positive, heartfelt stories -
Give your friend D a hug from me, too. Wonderful post! | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/30/2008 9:32:23 AM | How wonderful, Red, that D could join us through your uplifting thread, & what a beautiful post. I was just thinking the other day how much we miss her around here.
You're both extraordinary women & I'm really glad you rippled into my life. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/30/2008 11:27:39 AM | I totally disagree. These words are very sweet and nice but I dont listen to people on POF very much. I listen to those that love and know me; not strangers that I dont know on a dating site. I may read what they write but in general I take it with a grain of salt.
There are nice, smart people on sites I'm sure, but looking at the profiles there are also lots of dysfunctional people who dont know what is right and wrong. Everyones words do not affect me. I read the room, and check the source. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/30/2008 1:02:39 PM |
I totally disagree. These words are very sweet and nice but I dont listen to people on POF very much. I listen to those that love and know me; not strangers that I dont know on a dating site. I may read what they write but in general I take it with a grain of salt.
I think that you misread what this thread is all about... It's not just about PoF posters affecting one's worldview and/or accepting at face value everything we read in forums. Who the hell does that?
It's about the ways in which we all affect lives of others, and the ways they affect our lives.
The consequences might be intended, or unintended.... We react to those whose words resonate with us, as well as to those whose words/actions were meant to be harming. Rune3 put it nicely:
people who are at odds from ourselves, people who even mean us and others harm, people with no good intention at all can lead to revelations that set people free.
I posted here my experiences that were positive, but I was affected even more by some of the experiences that were difficult and painful. The worst experiences of my life taught me perhaps the most valuable lessons.
I said earlier that I have seen the face of evil and I did. I have seen the faces of people who killed others and who would not think twice before harming me... their intention was to crush my spirit, but they could have annihilated my physical existence if they wanted... they already did it to many others. They were in control of my body and of my freedom; there was nothing that I could have done to change it. If they wanted, they could have ruined not only my life, but lives of those who I love the most.
The reason that the worst did not happen was not anything I have done or said, nor was it a sudden chage of heart that they had. The events unfolded the way they did due to historical circumstances, and it was my sheer luck that what happened to me happened at that particular time and not few months earlier. If it happened earlier, or if the changes that took place did not happen, I would not be here and I would not be writing these words.
It took me a while to get over that experience... to stop having nightmares. But, I got over it, on my own... no help of drugs... no shrinks. I came out of it stronger and wiser. I also came out of it with knowledge about the horrors that humans can inflict on others. I am now able to understand better how people on receiving end feel. I can empathize with their suffering because I know that what happened to me is just a tip of the iceberg and I know how terrifying it was and how shaken I was by it. I came out even more convinced that when one sees evil, one should speak out if she wants to make a difference, no matter the consequences. I came out being more able to relate to the pain of others, and perhaps that might make some difference in their lives....
My own little footprint in this world.
Because we all leave the footprint.
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/30/2008 1:06:41 PM | One's words and actions should be in sync with one another....then the Ripple Effect is at it's best. Yet, due to our human-ness, we can have our bad days and we can have our good days.
Personally, calm waters are the best. | |
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Posted: 5/30/2008 1:09:26 PM | | Red, you have made a difference in this little pond....since I have been a member, I have seen how you have changed....your spirit has softened more. :) | |
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Posted: 5/30/2008 1:15:50 PM |
I totally disagree. These words are very sweet and nice but I dont listen to people on POF very much. I listen to those that love and know me; not strangers that I dont know on a dating site. I may read what they write but in general I take it with a grain of salt.
Not everything we see/hear in the "reality" of physical world is more poignant of substance in comparison to here simply because its within a person's comfort zone.
To accept that Real Life reality is the only Reality...is more akin to fooling oneself IMO...just because something is tangible or close...does not make it "real."
Its a matter of being able to distinguish one thing from another situationally...
...rather than simply dismissing en masse these moments/people "with a grain of salt"... and give them creedence for nothing. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/30/2008 1:33:25 PM | | It is futile to attempt to estimate our impact. I could easily imagine a train of events beginning with George Washington stepping on a hornworm by accident and in the process, inadvertantly deterring a nuclear war between the United States and the Soviet Union in 1963. Some people believe that there are an infinity of different universes where every possible scenario is played out. If you could somehow look into them, you would be able to see what happened every time you zigged instead of zagged, every time you turned left instead of right. It is a thing to think about on dark nights over a glass of brandy when the lightning flashes on distant horizons and you are haunted by the ghosts of your past. | |
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| The Ripple Effect
Posted: 5/30/2008 2:49:21 PM | I think the most satisfaction I have received by making an impact on someone else's life would have been in my work life. The sexual abuse counseling speaks for itself although I have many positive stories of going from being a victim to being a survivor that have fed my soul.
My career in optics however, brings to mind a 5 year old boy who was sent to our office by the school. The day he picked up his glasses was full of excitement and wonder for him when he put them on, but his follow up visit made all in the office cry,when I was making adjustments to his glasses, and he said MS.________ did you know that a tree has all kinds of little things on it. I looked at his mother who said, he just realized when he received his glasses that a tree has individual leaves. Needless to say the whole office was teary eyed. That one teacher, who recognized that one little boy had a problem with his sight made a significent impact on all who shared that experience with him. It made us all more mindful of how important sight or lack of it is. I for one was so affected that I offered my services to volunteer at the local Childrens Home and Nursing Homes in my area. Before you knew it I had several Optical Technicians from other offices also offering their services. It was nothing earth shattering. A slight adjustment or repair to someones glasses, but more important, giving them someone to talk to besides the staff, even if it was for 15 or 20 minutes, was meaningful not just to them, but to us also.
PEACE
DONT TAKE AWAY SOMEONES DREAM.....IT MAY BE ALL THEY HAVE......... | |
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