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| So you met on the internet and you hit it off, what do you tell people about where you met?
Posted: 5/30/2008 1:29:52 PM | thatswhat, Dated a woman from another site for nine months ...and noticed that she'd never admit to our meeting via the Internet. It was as though she was ashamed for doing so ...when in fact, it was how she moved on IRL that she should be. Truly a hypocrite she is.
My feeling is that the Internet is a most viable venue for getting to know someone before you might agree to meet in-person, and I met my current SO and LOL last Fall ...via these forums after communicating freely for several weeks. No regrets for our not meeting in-person first. That old-fashioned way doesn't allow for learning how they might treat others in a ubiquitous environment. Cyber does. | |
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| So you met on the internet and you hit it off, what do you tell people about where you met?
Posted: 5/30/2008 5:27:12 PM | I have to use a little situational judgement, because I have a lot of friends and family who have a permanent word -association thing going on; if someone says "internet" the next word that flashes in their brain is "predator". I wouldn't care if they mentally painted a big "L" on MY forehead, but I don't want them worrying about me or looking down on the guy!
When my Mom was alive (and cognizant), I was VERY careful about avoiding anything but the most generic references to the internet when discussingmy social life with her. Had I ever revealed to her that I participated in online dating sites or general chat rooms, there would have immediately ensued a huge family "uproar" and she,as well as other family, would have been at the courthouse the next day trying to get me declared mentally ill/incompetent and put under her control...( no I'm not kidding, after my husband's death, she was always on the lookout for "leverage" to get me to move in with her)
Somewhere back along this thread the very good point was brought up that we don't actually "meet" people on the internet, we simply gain an awareness of them. "Meeting" doesn't actually occur until the 2 interested parties enter each other's physical presence.
I have found "we met through a mutual acquaintance" or "through an interest group" are good generic non answers LOL. For myself, I can often truthfully say I met someone at an auction or flea market or bookstore.
One semi-serious involvement I had,who was NOT met online, I used to explain that " I picked him up at the fleamarket". Almost literally...I towed his truck from where it broke down, 5 miles to the market site. No I am not making this up! Don't everybody get nervous,I was somewhat acquainted with him from previous market days.( I'll pull any fool out of a snowbank, ditch or mud, but I only TOW people I already know)
I think you handle "how/where did you meet him" based on not causing undue alarm to someone, or an unfair negative perception of the person in question, so I try to consider the inquirer's perception of/attitude about the internet when framing a reply.
Cindy O | |
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| So you met on the internet and you hit it off, what do you tell people about where you met?
Posted: 6/21/2008 4:56:14 AM | ^^^^ Good answer!!!!
I have had the odd person be uneasy about telling exactly where we met. For different reasons....
I think what may be important here is if you are dating...
taking note of what your partner is uncomfortable with and finding a common answer that you are both comfortable with.
So perhaps you could skip mentioning the initial "connection" to a dating sight and get right to the first meet and use that place which technically is the first place you "met" . | |
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| So you met on the internet and you hit it off, what do you tell people about where you met?
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:53:17 AM | You should ALWAYS make up a fresh new and totally untrue story whenever anyone asks (like that running gag that James Garner played out on the "Rockford Files" about how he injured his knee.... { actually it was during the Korean Conflict})
So you say -- "How did we meet -- oh well now -- seems we both served time in the same Turkish prison..." to the first one who asks. Next one you say: "Well, it was like this the elevator made this funny chattering sound and then it just stopped between the 13th and the 14th floors...." ....Or maybe "I was out sky-diving one day and -- and I was having a right devil of a time with my elastics and wouldn't you know -- there on the chute packing platform...." or how about: "Just on a whim -- I was taking the free tour that they offer down at City Hall after paying parking ticket as a favour for my limo driver and there was a Turkish prison guard I knew from an interrogation back when I was working for the CIA out of the Istanbul station -- that was back during in the dirty war of course...." Well -- anyway I am sure you get the idea...... But always remember: A GOOD LIE HAS LOTS AND LOTS OF DETAILS | |
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| So you met on the internet and you hit it off, what do you tell people about where you met?
Posted: 6/21/2008 11:34:21 AM | My first inclination would be to make up some totally ridiculous lie for fun...
But the thing is, if you're too embarrassed to say that it was online, all that does is perpetuate the very idea that is making you feel embarrassed. If everyone was honest and simply said exactly how they began communicating, perhaps that stigma would be erased for others in the future.
In fact, I think that the fact that it has led to so many successes in general is why it's become as acceptable as it is now. If someone else doesn't like it, who cares? | |
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Nothign to be embarassed about my cousin is marrying a guy she met off of match.
