| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/30/2008 7:32:14 AM | I agree with Funny Girl.
she valued her romp with him more than she did our friendship My conclusion would be that she wasn't the friend I thought she was and that the friendship meant little enough to her that she'd not feel the loss of it. She was basically deceitful and didn't show consideration or respect for your feelings. I'd not call someone who behaved like that 'friend'. | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/30/2008 7:59:12 AM | OP yes you have a right to be angry at your frined. You trusted her and she misused that trust by lying to you and doing something she knew would hurt you. If she didn't think it would hurt you, then she wouldn't have lied about it in the first place.
Been there done that as well and I felt the best thing I could have done in my situation was end the friendship. Because no matter what type of relationship it is, if there isn't trust then it's no good. And the fact that she would be bothered if you did the same to her, yet didn't think twice to do it to you, says alot for her character.
Good reddens to bad rubbish, I say!!! | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/30/2008 9:57:04 AM | | I agree that an ex can do what he/she wants but a friend is supposed to have your back and I think that a friend who goes out with your ex isn't a friend at all. It's just something that true friends wouldn't do to each other. | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/30/2008 3:21:27 PM | RSwindol it is not about self esteem its about knowing you can trust a friend . The fact her friend lied to her , of course is going to knock the trust factor down
Actually, according to what I gathered from the OP, it happened in this order...
1. The OP found out that her friend was messing with her ex.
2. The OP then got pissed off.
3. She then confronted her friend about the situation.
4. Her friend then lied about it.
5. She broke up the friendship.
Yes, she has a right to be angry about her friend lying. But had her friend not lied about it, I am pretty sure the OP would still be pissed. And that just doesn't make any sense unless she has a low self esteem.
Besides, if someone lies to you, it is perfectly natural to not trust that person again. But why would they have a hard time trusting other women because of the actions of one person? This is indicative of a low self esteem. And the only point that I am trying to make is that if the OP would work on her self esteem, then little things like this would not bother her as much as it obviously is. | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/30/2008 11:02:41 PM | I clicked to view your profile, i thought i was going to find an 18 or 19 yr old. I was surprised to see a 33 yr. I read your post and thought you were in high school.
So....because I was angry that a "friend" I use that term lightly lied and broke the trust between us makes me seem to be 18 or 19.....I don't think so. Now if I had shit a squiggly worm and kicked her ass, yes then maybe I could have sounded that young but I didn't. I did the mature thing and asked her about it and she still lied until she realized I knew what I was talking about. So....knowing I don't need someone like that in my life I cut all ties.
^^^ Dr phil you are not dude ..............................................................................
Christi66, you are awesome!!!! This comment made me smile. He just doesn't seem to get it and I have no need to get in a pissing contest with him. But thank you and everyone else for your opinions. | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/31/2008 11:12:29 AM | | This wouldnt sit right with me either..nothing you can do now except walk away from them both , the trust is broken and it will never be the same and you wont forget it..so its just gonna give you head noise in life..ask yourself if these are the type of people you want in your life ...then let them be and move on...trust to me is like a window , once broken ,you can tape it up all ya want..but it will never give you the same view again... | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 5/31/2008 12:05:41 PM |
I clicked to view your profile, i thought i was going to find an 18 or 19 yr old. I was surprised to see a 33 yr. I read your post and thought you were in high school.
Feeling a little wise and superior, are we?
Happened to me when I was 57, and it hurt just as much then, perhaps more, than it would have when I was 18 or 19. Took me a full year of my life to work through the betrayal and pain. Mind, you, I'm glad I took the time to do it -- I learned things I could have learned no other way, and my spiritual life made a light-years leap. Still, if you'd asked me ahead of time if I'd wanted to do it, I would have said: Hell, no! That was the year I learned that an enemy is perhaps more useful to your growth than a friend.
God bless our enemies. . . .
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:56:45 AM | OP I get you. It's not about the ex, but about the double standard and betrayal of your "friend" People are just not always what we expect them to be, and at times it can be disappointing. This is one of the reasons I NEVER confided in anyone things about my realtionships.
Move on.........your anger and hurt are affecting no one but you....................... | |
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| Ok, ya'll I need some feedback; Am I in the right or wrong?
Posted: 6/2/2008 10:48:25 AM | Your Ex is your Ex for a reason right? I know it's a little hurtful when a so called best friend goes out with your Ex, however, you broke up for a reason I'm asuming so if your friend wants to go down the same road with him then let her. Obviously if you were close with your friend you probably told her all about the problems you were having so she knows exactly what she's getting into with him. I say let her go through it and when she comes crying to you because he did the same things to her that he did to you, don't give her any sympathy.
I've had lots of friends date my ex's however they were all good enough friends to ask if I would mind first. To be honnest, if you end your relationship on good terms it shouldn't matter who dates the ex, even if they are your close friend, and if it's on bad terms... well just don't hang around them when they are together. It's pretty simple.
If any of my friends were to date one of my ex's and lie to me about it I would be angry about the lie, not the fact that they are dating my ex. but to each their own I guess. | |
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