| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:45:44 PM | | Hey ak music,thanks for the words,it is a real ****,but I am tying to put my trust and situation in God's hands.I know this may be a mean thing tosay and think,but I dohope that something happens w/that relationship | |
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| made mistake of lifetime,ADVICE
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:50:00 PM | | Dude, women are very giving but even they reach a point where enough is ENOUGH! you learned a hard lesson so just move on she has, my ex said to me I'll never say never did i care hell no, that is a loaded statement and carries no weight except to get a reaction out of you! if the relationship was meant to be you would be together now, stop feeling sorry for youself and get back out there! FOR THE LOVE OF BOB! I now know why there are very few REAL MEN LEFT!,LOL | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:52:04 PM | | I"ve seen you say two hurtful things on here to people trying to help you. Why do u feel the need to be cruel to these people? You brought your personal problems to us for help so if you don't like what's being said then fix your own messed up life. There's just no reason to be mean when we're all just trying to help and be truthful. Usually, nothing's ever sugar coated here in the forums and I wouldn't want it to be. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:56:28 PM | The best thing that you could have done for yourself if you ever gave a damn about your family, would be not date. Why did you have to run out and get your****wet
because your slutty wife was a whore? MY GOD!!!!!! Can't you keep your pants on boy?? Next, what about giving time, "time". You were married.
That is not disposable...but hey.................... maybe to you your wife.....her lover..............your lover.............your lover's lover................her lover's lover, your wife's lover's other lover......................maybe it is 
If you treat your life and relationship with no respect and like crap
This is what you get.
Think twice
Grow up | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:06:55 PM | I'm sorry, but it's beginning to become very clear why you're having so many issues here. You came to this forum asking for advice....when you do that, you need to be prepared for what may come. Basically all I've seen you do is put people down,eg.janet4ever, by implying that because she has a picture of her and her pet that thats why shes single and doesn't have a man. Seriously, you dont seem like a nice person at all, which could be why your chick bailed.
Don't come on here asking for advice if you're gonna be a complete ***hole.
To all the nice people who took the time out to give advice to this guy, move on, he's obviously too bitter to realise that people aren't having a go at him and he will continue to take things you say the wrong way.
Very clear to me why he can't get her back. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:14:02 PM | There is one last thing I would like to say before I get off,It is feeling that I have in deep in my heart.I strongly feel that this is something worth fighting for,if I didn't feel this way,I wouldn't be trying to do everythigh to try and get her back.I wouldn't of talked with her and let her know how I felt,I would've just let things be and do my best to move on.
I know a little about waiting for something so long,I am an emt,it took me 12 years to acomplish getting my certification.Waiting for more years and wanting the best of things really isn't a bad thing | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:22:41 PM | It is true that I came to this forum for advice and/or help,but I really didn't expect to hear the wrong things,that's why I said what I said,I apoligized to one for the misunderstanding already.
Here is the other thing,I treated both my ex-wife and my ex-girlfriend like they were gold statues.I never cheated on either of them,Yes there were misunderstandings in both relationships,and we had our problems,but I never did anything to really hurt them.
I am now paying for my mistakes that have been made in these relationships,and I don't want to hurt anymore,I just want someone to love and someone to be with.I found that someone,and due to my own ignorance I let her go.I plan to do what I have to to show her that I'm not the person I was in our relationship,that I can try and be even better than I say I can be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:30:03 PM | | Wow, "Im sorry"...You need to move on...You let someone go due to your own ignorance?...Havent we all!...Your last thread sounds a bit desperate...Whats the opposite hurt and pain?...Joy and happiness!...Good luck | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:49:06 PM | Right now you are going thru rebound period again. It's easy to love or think you are in love when you are lonely. As for the young lady, she should have asked to see the papers divorced or otherwise. I kinda fault her a little for not taking precaution. Getting a divorce after 20years is not the same as getting a divorce after 2years. She should have been the wiser.
Before you can even start a relationship with ANY woman, you need to get your house in order. That means financial and emotional.Until that you are setting yourself up for more heartache. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:53:11 PM | Sooo~o ~~~~~ whats the problem with being a fool? You bleeding out? feel like you are going to die? ~ or just feel ugly, unwanted and lonely?
You played the game ~ and foolishly
"think" ~ that you have lost?
In my eyes ~ you have won!
You are 2 and 0
"this" you can't see ~ can you?
Thats only because you are injured and blind.
Go fishing! ~ leave town ~ subject yourself to the unknown ~ grow and learn new things. You life has yet to begin! ~ you describe yourself as someone just bumping around in the dark.
Live large ~~ room for many more mistakes yet to be made. ~~think about it! dance | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:57:16 PM | | Sorry about the pain you must feel. You lost a wife, best friend turned traitor, and what you think may have been your soul mate. As far as meeting with her and telling her your feelings, your not a fool. You have some closer. If you didn’t try, it would have haunted you for the rest of your life. At least with time, you will heal. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:06:04 PM | | For your own sanity and peace of mind, you need to move on...she already has. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:12:19 PM | It was then that she told me of how she started dating someone else and how it must hurt me to know how happy she is.
Dude...there it is............. SHE IS HAPPY NOW. If you really cared for her you would leave her alone and let her be happy.
A real man.... a real gentleman....upon hearing from his ex that she is happily involved with another man, would congratulate her and wish her the very best with her new relationship.......and he would move on and let her be happy.
A punk, a wuss, a weak man, a selfish man, a clingy man, a shallow man, a needy man would continue to hound her and try to convince her to leave her happiness and to come back to him........
Which man are you going to be .................
Peace | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:28:55 PM | We had our issues and in the end I broke it off with her
I'm curious about the reason for the breakup....
Since you are the one who did the breaking off, I'm sure you know it is her perogative as to whether the relationship should resume - or not. I don't fault you for telling her how you feel, and giving a reconciliation an honest shot. But you have to accept what she told you and let the matter rest. To disregard her feelings in the matter is to show egotism and disrespect.
How you handle this now may have an impact as to whether she will want to reunite with you in the future, so my advice is to respect her wishes, let her know you will be there if she should change her mind, and wish her the best. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:35:25 PM | I agree that until the divorce is FINAL you should not be fooling around ... I was so crushed to find out that a guy I was so close to was still married and not actualy divorced for about 3 more months ... You made a mistake and Im sorry to say that I dont know if everything could be ok again ... It was a huge lie to say you were already divorced and it was so wrong to fool around while still married ... Maybe if you think of not just her but what she would need to get passed this you might be able to make it work ...
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 3:20:17 AM |
a dog instead of a man,no wonder your still looking
looking at your pic I can see why he left you
Judging from making comments like that towards people who are just trying to share their experience and trying to help you look at yourself, I can guess why *both* of these women want nothing to do with you anymore. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 3:37:02 AM | Are you a fool for how you should feel?
Yes
Should you stay and wait? Absolutely not!! I'm sorry you are in such pain after this break up - just realize that life is short and precious in our lives. It's best to move on and enjoy your life. We have all had break ups in marriages and dating, but if you love someone, let them go - move on and realize you can still love them from a place in your heart! Get out there ... have fun and enjoy your life! | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 6:18:51 AM | I would like to say, if I can in my own defense here.Both women didn't leave me because of my attitude,one left me becuase that we married early in our reltaionship and we fought majority of the time and now that the divorce was finalized a few months ago,we are still fighting over stupid things.As far as the other woman is concerned,I broke that relationship up,because of a few personal reasons within myself.I became afraid at a point,because I knew that I wanted to spend eternity with her,but really couldn't offer anything.I thought that the breakup was best.There were other personal issues between us I would not like to discuss right now,after talking with her this last time she told me all she needed was companionship and someone to love her,my profile may have something different on it,but is what I'm looking for.
I've done the dating scene with and without this website,and actually a few others to boot,but I realized that with the women I've dated no matter how well things were between us it ended,and I never fought for what I felt was the right thing.Even though my ex is seeing someone else,her friends don't like me,my family and friends tell me to move on,I feel that this is a fight worth fighting.
Ladies and Gentleman,those who have responded to this,I do apreciate the responses and I do apologize for anything and everything said.It's just a few of the responses I've gotten back are from people whether male or female that I've seen them as being scorned by someone that they've loved,and I am soory for there feelings and there sadness,but has anyonesat ther to themselves and said maybe with some very hard work this can work?I know it may sound that I'm living in a fairy tail world,but It's what I believe.I strongly,strongly believe that anything can be accomplished with alot of hard work.I feel that I deserve a little bit of something to try and show things right.I don't expect 75% nor do I expect 50%,I want to try with 10%.I know that there is a fine line to be walking here,but I wouldn't have it any other way | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 6:25:58 AM | | One other thought,It's not like I'm going to be stalking her,bothering her,or whatever the case maybe.I don't plan on saying anything to her as far as a relationship maybe concerned.I am going to live my life,work my job,and so on and so on.If per chance she is to say something to me,and yes I know that there is snowballs chance in haedes,then I would elaborate more about things.All I'm going to be doing is waiting on the sideline,if per chance I don't get my chance back,well I know it's going to hurt even more than now,but I will have to deal with it. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:23:24 AM | | Here is somehting taken from a news story about lying to someon."The good news is that much of our dishonesty doesn't come from a bad place.We're not always tryng to be deceptive;often we're trying to please the other people,even at our own expense" | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:36:14 AM | Hooray for your ability to share your heart with her! Boo on these hard nosed posters. But like so many have said. You laid your cards on the table and she's not where you want her to be in the game. She's moved on and so should you. It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all......
It's just gonna take time. Good luck. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:46:15 AM | OP. i wish you (guys) when you write would of get to the point...
instead of writting a whole book..
i lost concentration easily..
needless to say..
i couldnt pass read paragraph 4.
what ever going on with you . Gooood luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:49:23 AM | You say you treated your women like gold..................perhaps you are needy and clingy and no one can live with someone being around all the time. Just from your obsessiveness with this woman I can feel the walls closing in...............
And by the way when you start a post....dont always expect to hear what you want to hear.......be prepared for some truth................... | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:58:57 AM | ejems
As much as it hurts, you are going to have to go on with your life -- she was a rebound no matter if you want to deny this. This was the first person that you dated after your breakup with your wife as well as the aftermath of Katrina. I believe that you mentioned to her about your marital status, but I believe that it was a comment in passing that she didn't completely catch. I have always made it a practice to never date someone in the same company that I work for or a client. If your company restructures then you could find yourself working for her or she for you.
Cut your losses. Today is the first day of the rest of your life -- treat it that way. I lost my husband to death and I still wonder "what if". Time does heal. Good luck. Best wishes. My prayers are with you. | |
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| made mistake of lifetime
Posted: 6/2/2008 8:10:02 AM | | OP, perhaps when next you fall in love (and you will, if you allow yourself time to be alone and heal before going off half-cocked), try treating your partner like a flesh and blood, imperfect and still learning person and equal partner with you on a journey of teamwork and discovery and shared pleasure. Gold statues are heavy and sort of cold, and if I've made someone I'm with into one it's my duty to release them from their bondage. | |
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