| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 12:20:13 PM |
Guys I talk to or have dated bragging about how this ex or that ex got off every single time with them, or got off several times, from JUST intercourse.
Exactly why do they feel the need to tell me this shxt in the first place?? See, I myself cannot "arrive" that way, but I never have and never will ever fake it. All hearing this stuff does is make me feel miserably inadequate.
Most guys; especially young ones; are extremely insecure; they brag about sex often. | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 1:50:59 PM | Well tigger a huge part of sex and orgasm happens above the neck  . Could even be these guys are not what you want in that respect. Although I still must admit that in your age group this still happening surprises me. I was still a pup when I figured out that no amount of bragging on my part would ever swing something in my favour. Now if a few ladies have something complimentary to say about you ..... well yet another reason for amicable break-ups.
^^^ Note that is mostly for the guys that still haven't bought a clue and are still doing this  | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 2:24:05 PM | Loony, you have a good point about above the neck.
It's far easier for me to experience incredible pleasure with someone if I feel accepted, cared for, attractive to them, able to be myself. | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 2:38:58 PM | Bingo that "feeling of being free and able to be completely uninhibited" just happens to be how I've found out alot more women are squirters than you'd think too . Not often for that with just intercourse though since they often take a few big O's to really let their guard down and just get completely in the moment.
And to be clear, after re-reading my own post I wasn't pointing any fingers, just sharing an observation. | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 2:41:04 PM | Lies Lies Lies..............he´s saying that cause he doesn´t know the first thing about taking care of his woman.............or he´s just a lazy **stard.........hahaha
Kick him out of bed............. | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 2:55:27 PM |
I'm not "hard to get off"...it just takes certain things, and for them to get to know what I like.
I am
so f'ing what? I haven't had any complaints..well there was one, but I kicked his ass to the curb.
Why is it such a stigma to not be trigger happy...women, for the most part, aren't built that way, and most women are a hell of a lot slower than men in this regard. No woman should have to feel ashamed, or 'less than" because she doesn't come in multiple waves at the touch of a hat. I think we were put here to SLOW men down, and enjoy all the sensual pleasures that speed and goal-oriented sex misses. Yes.. the destination is awesome, but man oh man the journey is sometimes the best part... this is where the real intimacy comes in.. this is where you really discover one another.. and where you can show your real self and give your all to another. It's a place of total vulnerability, of real trust... or it can be.
Okay, maybe I'm dating myself here, but in my experience a man who actually wants to please, and is willing to explore with you how that works for you is a gem... and the desire to reciprocate with such a man will be deep and marvelous. I don't find this very common amongst younger men... maybe it's experience, maybe it's just patience..I don't know.
A man who hangs his masculinity on how quick he can get you off is a waste of time. So is one who can't kiss and keep it to himself. THAT is a personal trust...
Ever wonder why very few porn stars (female) actually have a real orgasm on film? (yes I CAN tell the difference)
Peace, and good luck | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 3:04:30 PM | Well tiggertoes in my experience (which isn't a whole lot lately.. ) I can say that men who normally brag or talk about how good they are and what they can do for you or have done for others are the ones who couldn't please a woman if they tried and this is just a way for them to make themselves look good to you...you should know that by now. | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 3:39:37 PM | | Isn't it astounding how many men in your age group haven't discovered that sex takes practice every time you meet someone new? I'm still surprised by how many women in this group repeatedly date these guys instead of trying (for experimental purposes only, of course!) a different age group........perhaps a little older and better versed in the art! | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 4:11:53 PM | Most of the women I've slept with had a hard time achieving vaginal orgasm.
So, I just chose a position, like doggy, or from the side where she could stimulate her clitoris and that usually did the trick. When you find a decent lover, suggest that to him. And there's a small vibrating clitoral stimulator you can buy. My late wife used it sometimes.
If the guy is that concerned about you having a vaginal orgasm, he's doesn't care about your pleasure, just his ego.
If I know a woman can't orgasm that way, I'll just stimulate her orally or manually to orgasm before intercourse.
The gentleman above is quite correct about men our age being more versed in the art. We also like to go slow and sensuous because we only have one "shot" at it and want to make it last and make it good. Of course, that's not all of us. There are probably as many insensitive, selfish jerks in our age group as in yours.
Before anyone goes "ewwww" dirty old man. I only date women in my age group...but a man can fantasize can't he? :) | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 4:17:33 PM | | yanno what they say....huge ego....lil lacking in other departments.....mhm | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 4:21:29 PM | Re the Opost
1) We are all sick of hearing one thing or another. Tolerance is the way.
2) "....Also, why don't they realize that most women can't "arrive" that way?? (or at least that's what the statistics say.
I suspect either these guys are lying, or their women faked it like there was no tomorrow...."
Or (c) that their exes were the minority in those statistics!
Plus goes to prove that most men do not have enough experiences for them to be able to reach statistically valid conclusion! So they extrapolate on what experiences they have (or think they have). | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 4:41:43 PM | The funny thing is, if the man is truly driving the relationship, you're going to be peeling your panties off for him...not him trying to convince you of ways to do it.
His name must be LOO(ser)...drop him now.
Oh my!! Thought was probably the most correct way to put that...and still make me feel like I was reading an erotic novel. LOL Well said.
He's right, when man tell me how much they love oral, or how good they are in bed, before its appropriate to discuss these things.. (and guys: I mean not the first night you meet) I just figuire they need to prove something to themselves. I don't brag...but am pretty sure if he's lucky enough to have me there, I'm gonna make it worth both our whiles...LOL | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 5:01:07 PM | | Simply put..if a guy starts bragging to me about his sexual conquests with past women before we even meet or get to that point... he's never going to find out if I'd be one... Not someone I want to get involved with in that manner... As many have indicated..actions do speak louder than words. A guy I choose to be with won't have to brag...he'll just be able to enjoy the moment for what it is.... | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 5:03:58 PM | I, too, am sick of hearing it! What makes them think we want to hear that mess anyway? Our (my guy and I) experience should be new and different from any past experience, so we should just "go" there together.....and if he's worth anything, he'll be interested in "getting" us both there together!
Just a side note: I'm also not turned on by the fellas who question me at length about my experiences. I think it's tacky to share such details even if they do initiate the conversation.
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 5:15:32 PM | | The next time you here some guy saying , I used to give my ex twenty orgasm by doing bla bla blah. Here's what you should tell them: "Oh, really? Well, since were on the subject of having sex with other people, I've been with several men who were very skilled in bed and I have found that this is the only way I can get off. " "First you need to ride around the room naked, on a unicycle, wearing only women's panties and a top hat, with a clamp attached to your junk. Then you juggle three large knives above your head, while I stand on a chair and throw frozen blueberry waffles at your ass. That's pretty much the only way I can orgasm and it's amazing! So, when do you want to get started?" | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 8:20:57 PM | Yeah that's a pretty big turn off to me.
Same with guys on the forums always having to throw in the same sh*t.
Not impressive.
If it really happened, why feel the need to go on and on about it? | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 8:35:26 PM | I don't know that I would agree that "most" women can't arrive that way, unless "that" way doesn't include simultaneous clitoral stimulation. Granted, I have a relatively small sample size, but quite a significant percentage could cum without even that. Of course, there were those who couldn't even get themselves off without a vibrator. *shrugs*
Now, where exactly did you get those statistics? | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 9:12:35 PM | "Guys I talk to or have dated bragging about how this ex or that ex got off every single time with them, or got off several times, from JUST intercourse."
Its just that. Bragging. Experience shows that these are the chumps that usually have no clue about anything they're doing down there. It truly is a rare skill to learn to please women sexually, but once acquired, is probably one of the most rewarding things.
Also, its not really about the sex. A woman's orgasm is very cerebral. A lot of it has to do with what is done before/during/after the sex to stimulate the mind.
Regardless though.
Some guys will never get it. And I'm content with that, knowing that their girls will be around for the picking :-) | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 9:31:30 PM | Okay, another poster already tried to clue in a couple of you ladies.
An orgasm relies in part to your BRAIN. . .the largest sexual organ in your body.
So get with the right guy--someone like ME--who works at it a little--AND work on your state of mind/attitude/mentality (you choose the word) and yuo should no longer have problems.
I don't have problems making women cum as I often go down on them and take care of them that way before I am even inside them.
Then again, if a man makes love to you correctly it is technically possible for you to cum just from sexual intercourse.
Whether a man is making love to you with his penis or his tongue he has to hit the right spot!
As for the bragging. . .I don't know. . .I don't really volunteer that kind of information without someone cueing me. | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/3/2008 11:08:04 PM | | Yanno' another thing that seems abundant in the male population?? Telling us ladies how much they love oral sex!! I swear, I have gotten emails from guys HERE on the site..."And I REALLY love oral!" OMGawd...and my profile gives you the impression you can tell me that, because....???" | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/4/2008 6:52:34 AM | Ravenstar66 girl just taaake your time ....generally older guys finally realize sex is not a auto race ...its a long winding road ...its not about who gets there first or even about how many laps you complete ...its about enjoying the journey ...kicking back and cruising...its about you and the road ...its about feeling a inseparable part of the machine your driving /or the woman as the case might be...if you feel this she will feel it also ....thats almost certain
aside from this i have found there is one place you can touch almost any woman that will most surely get her juices flowing and make it easy to make her orgasm....and that would be HER HEART
it matters less how you enter her vagina ...if you can enter her soul you will be worshiped as a sex god | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/4/2008 7:43:23 AM | First of all, not being able to orgasm thru vaginal stimulation only is NOT a "problem" as some have said. Depending on the source, it's estimated that only about 20-30% of women can orgasm without direct clitoral stimulation.
For the guys, think about it this way...can you orgasm thru testicle stimultion only? Some can, but most need stimulation to their penis (the main sex organ, ike the clitoris in women.) I wouldn't call that a problem, would you???
To the OP: He sound like an arogant ahole! In my experiences, the ones who brag are the ones who aren't very good (kinda like the people who talk about it all the time are the ones who aren't getting it, KWIM? LOL) If he was that good, he certainly wouldn't need to tell you. IMO, the only reason he said that was to make you feel inadequate, which is being very selfish.
Also, I do not care to hear about anyone's exs in the bedroom. That's the past, I'm the present, move on...LOL!! | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/4/2008 8:36:56 AM | Deerdog
you are a sweetie
I've figured out how it works for me.. oh, the advantage of age and experience, and being comfortable with one's self!.. but you are absolutely right, it's mind, heart, body and soul that makes for the best sex.
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/4/2008 9:08:32 AM | > Now, where exactly did you get those statistics?
"Compared to men, women are incredibly varied in their sexual characteristics. Some women (2 to 4 percent) never reach orgasm; others (5 percent) have multiple orgasms, scarcely coming down from one climax before building up to the next. Ten percent never climax during intercourse; another 10 percent nearly always climax. [Some 30% in all can climax during intercourse often or always. ] Some prefer to be totally passive in their buildup to climax during intercourse; others prefer to be more active. Fifty percent masturbate regularly; 20 percent never do. Finally, 40 percent have nocturnal orgasms, whereas others cannot even imagine such an event."
- from Robin Baker's book Sperm Wars
I'd actually have to get up off my rear-end, go over to the book shelf, open up the book, search around some, etc. to tell you where he got those numbers from.
> (OP) Exactly why do they feel the need to tell me this shxt in the first place?
Perhaps because they've heard the propaganda so many times about how women like, want, need, and enjoy sex just as much as men do that they think it would be a selling point, especially compared to saying the opposite? Or perhaps because they've never heard of women throwing themselves madly at men who don't do what the OP is whining about? | |
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| So sick of hearing this
Posted: 6/4/2008 10:57:14 AM | OP, is it possible you're just overreacting? I'm wondering this because the thread started out giving the impression that this is a big issue, but later you downgraded it to: "It's not every guy saying it, just a few I've known thru my life."
Which makes me also wonder about the nature of these remarks that you're so "sick of hearing." Maybe not so much bragging and offensive and selfish, as hopeful? Another reason I'm thinking that is because it sounds like you've out and out DECIDED you can't climax that way (and are convinced most other women can't either, and are just big fat fakers).
In short, if someone's saying things on purpose to make you feel bad, that's pretty horrible. But if, in fact, he's saying it along the lines of: "Let's try again, because it's an awesome experience for both partners," I'd say cut him a break.
By the way, there really isn't a huge trick to achieving orgasm during intercourse as far as I can tell, even for those of us who require clitoral stimulation to climax. It's just a matter of positioning, in my opinion. Even a slight pelvic tilt should do it, most of the time. | |
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