| Passion
Posted: 6/11/2008 9:45:21 PM | | Wayward i still say you exhibit all the finer things a gentleman could .I do suggest that you will deliver your opening line in a courteous and proper manner and should be looked upon by all women who find my post outlandish. Was that Tao. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/11/2008 9:49:37 PM |
Ageless you are both sexy and inviting, oops i hope i didn't offend, it was a natural response with no harm intended
No offense taken  | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/11/2008 9:55:06 PM | | Whew, I am glad. | |
|
~Kyn~
|
Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 79 | |
| Passion
Posted: 6/12/2008 2:29:03 AM |
How funny one equates a mans feelings and passion as sleazy. You have to feel sleazy to be sleazy. As far as crapping lady, you must have a full load.Those who have absolute no and i mean no confidence in themselves feel threatend by a mans passion.
Here's a heads up.
UNTIL you know a woman...it IS sleazy AND it is inappropriate. It is NOT passionate.
Its a lusting complete stranger on the other side of cyberspace talking crap.
Women find it OFFENSIVE.
Shyte...
Men cant still be that clueless after 45 
Sesame street...doesnt come close. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/12/2008 2:36:15 PM | Heads up.Any women who can use the word" Shyte"deserves the utmost respect .Sesame Street doesnt come close you are right Men can be clueless after 45 and after all women can be Victorian, can't they.I see you hold everyone to a higher standard except yourself. Good luck mixing with the clergy, just dont use the SH word. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:43:18 PM | | what is that word used in cyberspace describing a person who posts specifically for a reaction because of their need for attention? it slips my mind, damned old age! | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:48:36 PM | | The word is intelligent Old age never affected me, must be because of my passion | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:49:49 PM | What ever happened to adjectives like "pretty".. "attractive".. especially before you even meet the woman.
I mean sure I like for a man to think I am sexy.. but sometimes I like to hear that I am pretty or beautiful.. at first then he can tell me I am sexy..
I just think that some men just want to make sure that they are not getting involved with a woman who is frigid.. and that has become their obcession.
I don't think it is being politically correct to respect a woman and be careful the words you use to compliment her. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/12/2008 9:06:21 PM | | I am just a passionate type of guy.I already know from your pic you are pretty and beautiful, thats a given .My first reaction she is sexy and very inviting .That is not meant in a crude or vile manner, because the follow up is neither. If i get he's a nice guy, that TO ME is offensive, This is a dating site and if i find the email offensive there are ways to filter them out.Say what you feel and if to me its offensive i will act accordingly I see all kinds of women on the net doing and saying all kinds of things, do i past judgement, no. If i follow it up and the tone or pics are not to my liking i will filter them out. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/13/2008 4:09:47 AM | OP, you say this to a woman:
I see you hold everyone to a higher standard except yourself. Good luck mixing with the clergy, just dont use the SH word.  Then you come back a few posts down and say this?
I see all kinds of women on the net doing and saying all kinds of things, do i past judgement, no. Ummm, yes... you did.
On topic:
Well, you asked for opinions/thoughts... and you got them.
I agree that people shouldn't 'have to' hold their 'passion' (sic) in, if they don't want to.
But ... then... they're also going to have to handle some of the consequences!
In public, you'd probably get a pocketbook upside the head if you said to a woman you'd like to meet, "hey, you look sexy and inviting".. especially the "inviting" part.
Behind a computer screen you're right... people can just filter out what they feel is offensive or inappropriate.
The one with the 'passion' they didn't hold in... they get only the consequence of being filtered out, they're safe from that pocketbook upside the head.
They may even get a good consequence.. they successfully find another who has the same instant lust... um, I mean passion.
But, come on a forum and ask for opinions on it... you're gonna get opinions (ya think?).
How well did you handle that consequence?
You postured and grabbed for all the attention you could get.
You really did come across as an attention troll.
I think, in my opinion, your words are all a bit needy and pitiful. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/13/2008 7:08:40 AM | You bring up a very good point, Ms. Breath. The true measure of someone's communication with another person is whether that style of communicating would be done in real life, face-to-face. Otherwise, it's just empty words, said behind the protection of an anonymous ID and miles and miles of computer cable, and is thus why I've generally ignored this thread and haven't bothered discussing it seriously. I wouldn't tell a woman on meeting her face-to-face that she was sexy and inviting. So it makes little sense to me to discuss why I should do it here.
Just my opinion ...
cdn guy | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/13/2008 8:12:12 PM | | breath, incredible logic,where did you concoct that opinions ,consequences , pocketbooks on the upside of heads In my opinion your words are a bit needy and pitiful.How old did you say you where My rhetoric to you is similar to yours .If you equate sexy and inviting with lust, thats your opinion, and thats fine, but to come up with that dietrite is pitiful .By the way someone who is searching and sharing opinions is cdn guy | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/13/2008 9:07:06 PM | Message this short may not be posted.
Nuts
Amen.
Amen is all I wanted to say. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/14/2008 12:48:04 AM | I'm not going to say who it is, but one woman who responded mentioned character, personality, and the other intangibles, and has a main pic in a low cut blouse bending over and displaying enough cleavage to be on the cover of Swank!! Come on.. you cannot have it both ways!! You can't use sex to lure a man and then say "Don't treat me like a sex object!" If you want to attract a man's mind, then use your mind to attract him, not your body. If you want a man to treat you like a person and not a sex object, don't portray yourself as one. Because the bottom line is that if you use sex to attract a man, that's what he's going to expect to get. And that's only fair, whether you like it or not. You're going to attract men looking for sex. If you emphasize your personality, intelligence, and independence, you're going to attract men looking for those qualities.
Branes, I totally agree with you. If you act like a lady you will be treated as such, and if you act like a tramp, then you only have yourself to blame when you get treated like one. If what you're displaying are your physical attributes, don't be surprised if that's what men write to you regarding. You can't flaunt your breasts or legs and expect men not to comment on them. That's not being rational. What do we women think of men who are naked and sprawled out on a bed, half covered by a sheet? We think he's looking to get laid and we are right. The same applies to women. If you don't want to be treated like a piece of meat, don't display your prime cuts.
If you equate sexy and inviting with lust, thats your opinion, and thats fine, but to come up with that dietrite is pitiful .
TG - the last time I checked Diet Rite was a diet soft drink that the Coca Cola company no longer makes. I think you may mean 'diatribe'. And what else do you mean by 'inviting' if it isn't in a lustful connotation? I doubt that you mean she looks like she's going to invite you over for coffee. Why are you asking for women's opinions when you are clearly not paying attention to them? You wanted to know how the majority of women would feel about receiving an initial email from a man where he states she "looks sexy and inviting". Well, the majority of women have told you they would be offend. Now you can argue the point but it's not going to change the fact that it is offensive to most women. Or you can actually try to comprehend what we are telling you and learn from it. The choice is yours. Just don't blame us if you get quite a few 'Read/Delete's. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/14/2008 9:46:24 AM | Actually, this is an interesting discussion and there is more to it than at first meets the eye. If we were all honest in what we said, what would we be saying? Much of it might be politically incorrect. We might want to be more passionate in some circumstances. However, I guess for me the mark of a mature man is that he is passionate but his passions are 'governable'. He is in control of himself. In fact, I find the combinations of passionate but in control, strong but sensitive, etc., to be most exciting and compelling.
If you send an overly passionate or suggestive message to a woman you do not know, then you are showing that you are not actually in control. You are demonstrating impulsivity. There is a time and place for such passion, e.g. in a private place or in bed with the woman you love. We are all impulsive or inhibited to different degrees and I am sure we can all tolerate different variations in these. In my experience, people with higher impulsivity have had substance misuse problems or tendencies towards ADHD (Attentin Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). Substance misuse often results in the person becoming less inhibited and saying and doing things others would baulk at. This is embarassing and not at all endearing. I am very familiar with ADHD and would not hold it against anyone, but I like to be aware of it. If you find you cannot actually control your impulsive nature, then you might like to consider getting an assessment for ADHD. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/14/2008 12:53:30 PM | Witching I don't need an assessment, I already know I have ADD after going through the whole nine yards with each of my two boys. I would submit, however, that it has nothing to do with blurting out whatever first comes to mind in an email or chat window. If I met you, I might think, "Boy would I ever like to ..." but our first conversation would be boring if it was limited to that.
I have the thought that this whole conversation is about how men and women like to dance the dance that sometimes passes through the bedroom. The ladies like to dance and twirl around in a seemingly random pattern that just seems to end up in bed sooner or later. The men like to get down in their starting blocks and see who can sprint there the fastest. It seems to me the wise man shows the lady he knows how to dance very well and is not in any hurry for the dance to end, because she will show her sprinting prowess down the road. The wise man will be doing a lot of dancing and learns to enjoy it rather than complaining about women who don't want to sprint with strangers. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/14/2008 5:25:18 PM | Forum ,I bow down to you regarding diatribe. I guess it was my faux pas
Having said that, what i noticed is the people on this forum have a hard time with seeing cleavage, legs , men in towels.They are equating that with inappropriate behaviour.They are equating that with "they get what they deserve".These people might be fine people, but alot are rush to judge. To catch a mouse you put up some cheese.Maybe they are putting out some cheese..To say to (some women not all, the ones that make you a little warm) that they are sexy and inviting , to me is okay because thats the way i feel .Its not like WEATHER says offensive and out of control.Where was he born .Then there is WAYWARD (a fine gentleman) dancing all over trying to get something
We can look at many pics, on some there is no interest, some, well its a possibility and some "they rock you".Its their response to you, that will dictate the rest.Unless you want to dance call "wayward" or you have trouble then "weather" is your man | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 12:52:19 PM |
If you act like a lady you will be treated as such, and if you act like a tramp, then you only have yourself to blame when you get treated like one. If what you're displaying are your physical attributes, don't be surprised if that's what men write to you regarding. You can't flaunt your breasts or legs and expect men not to comment on them.
In real life, we see each other's bodies, not just each other's faces. We usually see quite a bit of each other's bodies when it's hot outside. When I had only face pics, I got plenty of mail, but some guys would write and seemed to be concerned about whether or not I was fat since I didn't have any full body pics. Maybe I shouldn't have responded at all, but if I was interested in his profile, I usually did. If you ask me, I will say I need to lose weight because I do, but guys interpret that as being obese. With just one pic, guys no longer exaggerate it in their minds when I say I need to lose weight.
A guy telling me I'm sexy or that I have great legs doesn't offend me in real life or online. If it did, I would have spent a lot of my life being offended since I started getting a ridiculous amount of attention when I was 13 and still do occassionally. (Now I'm relieved when I do ) There was nothing I could do about it because it had nothing to do with my behavior or how I was dressed. I didn't wear makeup, shorts, or miniskirts because I wasn't allowed to and I didn't sneak around behind my parents' back to put on makeup or change clothes at school. I sometimes didn't want to walk out the door because I was very shy and guys honking and hollering out their car windows while driving by was a little embarassing to me. I had to learn to ignore it as much as I could and get used to it. It takes way more than an inconsequential email to offend me and I'm sure that most other women have also learned to take it in stride without getting too upset about it. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 1:18:23 PM |
Why would a woman misunderstand. Why would a woman perceive this is a bad impression rather then an honest feeling, which is based on a truthful pic and absolute truthful profiles? She can always not answer or filter him out. The one compelling unknown is if this is feeling of all woman or the ones 45+.
Wouldn't this defeat the purpose of you emailing her in the first place?
If you had a "click" when you saw her pic and read her profile, don't mess with the odds of you meeting her by putting your foot firmly in your mouth! You could easily set up a reply like: "I think you're attractive and liked your profile.". It's honest without being off-putting and I'd bet you'd get good responses.
Good luck! | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 5:29:37 PM | As NCRosebud, message 59, has pointed out already, OP, any woman who looks at your profile can see the 5 most recent posts you have made....including the one in which you state "I am looking for a woman to f**k." Not only that, but if she wanted to see just what sort of a gentleman you truly are, she could click on your history and see the last 25 posts.
My "prediction" of your chances for a date with said woman after she reads through only a few of your posts/threads: about as likely as your getting hit by lightning more than once, or winning the biggest lottery amount in North American history. In other words, about zero chance.
While I appreciate your desire to tell a woman that you find her attractive, the first email is not the time to do that!! Quite frankly I have received a few first contact emails in a similar vein to the one you suggest, and none of these men made it to a second email. They were blocked. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 6:22:22 PM | | Not once did i write a post or message where i asked a woman i'd like to fu**k.Now i can be humble and say you are mistaken or i can be truthful and call you a big big l**r. Now i appreciate your desire to completely distort the truth but i would also appreciate you to correct this gigantic error you made. | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 6:31:49 PM | | jonibgood If a female finds my message offensive than with all due respect i dont want a reply.This would not defeat the purpose. To me and again to me if a female is that shallow and lacks confidence to explore and find out why and whom emailed her then i wish her the best of luck and return other emails. Again, to me, my email is neither vulgar or offensive | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 6:38:13 PM | I prefer when a man says exactly what it is he likes " you have a great smile " or a beautiful outfit or it is a wonderful photo.
After I get to know him - if the "youlook sexy in that photo " comes out - I will be better able to accept it as an honest comment then thinking it is a pick up line.
It's taken differently in an email then in person.... | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 6:44:00 PM | Well my suggestion to all men..not just TG is to feel your feelings......after all feelings arent right are wrong........they just are...they come to the surface whether we want them to or not.....however that being said.......your feelings and your actions are 2 separate things........if I bytch slapped every guy that I met in public that was rude and obnoxious I'd be posting this from jail.......I however, having those feelings dont act on them.............................just saying..........feelings and actions......keep them separate....
PEACE............... | |
|
| Passion
Posted: 6/15/2008 6:45:54 PM | | Lily you are right .Different strokes for different folks.I can understand your point of view. Now my point of view is if she doesnt have the confidence to explore or look further, then it someone that is not for me. | |
|
Home
login 
