| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 7:34:16 PM | | Whatever the two of you did on your own time while you were broken up is none of his business, nor any of yours. I would recommend couples counseling & see how that goes. I understand how difficult this is for him, and I'm sure you might feel the same way, but if you really love each other, he has to let it go, because what is worse; him dwelling on it & ruining your new start together, or letting it destroy your relationship all together. The past is the past! He has to let it go and move forward & just be happy that the two of you are back together again. It not worth losing each other over if it is true love. It will take time. I am a firm believer in the benefits of a good counselor, if you find the right one that you both like. | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 7:44:26 PM | LOL what a joke.first of all i just read your profile and in the relationship category u say 'prefer not to say' and your obviously judging by your profile on here to find someone else so why the heck are u bothering asking the advice of people on your curent relationship with this guy.u obviously dont give a crap about fixing things otherwise u wouldnt be on here looking to meet someone else.plus your on here advertising about having just one night stands or just friends with benefits between the time you were off your relationship i doubt any quality guys with a brain are gonna consider dating u after hearing this.unless they only date u for one thing.
i really try not to be mean on theses things but i just couldnt resist this one sorry.your post was asking for it.lol | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 7:54:03 PM | I am much older than you and have personal experience on both ends of what you are talking about. You can take this anyway you want to or not, but I can guarantee you that it is not going to work out between him and yourself!! At least in a long term type of relationship!
Men are different than women in this area. Men are physically based and think in that realm, and emotions you were feeling that lead to F**k those guys means nothing to us and he will never get over what you did! Women as you know are more emotional and in your defense the sex isn't that big of a deal, however if he had fallen deeply and emotionally in LOVE with a woman while you two were broken up. You yourself would be having the same problem that he is!
It would just be a difference in the view point of men and women!
What I have said I KNOW to be true, but you take it or leave it... | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 8:23:46 PM | I am much older than you and have personal experience on both ends of what you are talking about. You can take this anyway you want to or not, but I can guarantee you that it is not going to work out between him and yourself!! At least in a long term type of relationship!
Men are different than women in this area. Men are physically based and think in that realm, and emotions you were feeling that lead to F**k those guys means nothing to us and he will never get over what you did! Women as you know are more emotional and in your defense the sex isn't that big of a deal, however if he had fallen deeply and emotionally in LOVE with a woman while you two were broken up. You yourself would be having the same problem that he is!
It would just be a difference in the view point of men and women!
What I have said I KNOW to be true, but you take it or leave it...
Winner , thread over | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 8:59:07 PM | First of all, let me make this clear. If a guy bragged about my current girlfriend having sex with him and them flicked me off, I hope it would take every bone in my body not to punch him as hard in the face as I possibly could
.. but I may turn out to be too nice of a guy for that kind of thing.
I pray to God I wouldn't be though!
To all the women mocking her bf, saying he's a baby - I hope you guys are put in the exact situation, except in reverse.
Then we'll see some different thoughts on this subject.
Much Love,
Chris | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 9:19:00 PM | | WELL, LETS ALL BE HONEST HERE............WHO DID HE SLEEP WITH DURING THAT TIME......it doesnt matter now does it.if you both love each other mistakes happen and we do things we cant change........its about today and the plans for tomorrow that matter...........God forgives our mistakes when we repent.......your man should as well if you assure him its all about him........from now on........if he still cant deal with it all you have to remind him is one thing..he isnt perfect either but you lve him just the same..............as far as the other guy is concerned..make him non existent to you.......sounds like a selfish ass anyway and you nor your boyfriend need him in your lives..as far as the other friends......you dont even have to look in their closets.......its got a past too........i wish you well....pat | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 9:35:36 PM | Stop thinking that you made a mistake. You and he were NOT seeing each other .
You were free to see anyone you chose, if it worked out... great ! ... the fact that it didn't is irrelevant. You were free to see as many guys as you wished.... if he cannot deal with that fact... it is most certainly HIS issue and you shouldn't see it as yours.
If he is angry because you saw guys while he and you were apart... again , his issue.
Did he expect you to join a convent when you two broke up ?
Would that have made him happy ? :)
I suggest that you tell him to grow up and stop acting like a child.
If he can't move on... it is probably better for you to move on yourself...
I'm sure it can't be too hard to find a man who won't act like a child.
Try to stop blaming yourself for something that not only wasn't wrong to do !
Good luck .. hope he can grow up a little before he loses you . | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/20/2008 9:59:44 PM | 3 men in 10 months ~ is afforded the label "village bike?" ~ and the Kicker, ~ one was a pure fling ~ Oh No! Run Forrest , Run!
It amazes me ~ how a young man and sometimes women think ~
someday ~ you'll find yourself ~ staring up at the ceiling ~ on your death bed with a body full on pain ~~
and think, "I wish ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dance | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 1:17:00 AM |
it is most certainly HIS issue and you shouldn't see it as yours.
If he is angry because you saw guys while he and you were apart... again , his issue.
Did he expect you to join a convent when you two broke up ?
Would that have made him happy ? :)
Just out of curiosity, did you read any of the other posts, or did you formulate your answer based on drugs??????
She broke up with him, he had no say in it...
They were still seeing each other...
They were talking about getting back together...
She says he' s not bashing her over it...
She says she loves him and wants to make amends....
And you say it's HIS problem and he needs to grow up...??????? What f&&king planet are you from?????
hope he can grow up a little before he loses you
Ummm I think she's worried about losing him, not the other way around. As I said above? What planet? | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 1:21:52 AM |
To all the women mocking her bf, saying he's a baby - I hope you guys are put in the exact situation, except in reverse.
Then we'll see some different thoughts on this subject.
Ohh, but then it will be 'different' you know.... hahahaha
Yes, I'd be interested in watching the posters messages over the next few months to see how consistent they are.... | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 1:29:53 AM | The woman I was involved with before I came to this country to work is now seeing a great man. We broke up because I had to come here and her situation was such she couldn't come with me. She is happy in this relationship with him and we talk often and remember the time we had together are will always be friends. Does it bother me she is now sleeping with another man? Not in the slightest, she's no longer with me and it's none of my business. Would it bother her to know I'm sleeping with other women? Not at all, she would be happy to know I would have found someone up here.
Well, that's damned magnanimous of you...
Mind you, it's apparent neither of you cared about each other enough to make it work, unlike this couple who seem to be trying really hard, so just what relevance does your tale of your EX have to this?????? You and your EX are NO LONGER TOGETHER.... Remember, she's sleeping with another guy. This couple however are in love and back together. Do you see the difference? Ahhh, now the light goes on....
Good grief....
mature enough not to be insecure and sulky because we can't handle the thought of someone we felt for sleeping with another.
Unless you didn't really care in the first place.... 'felt' really doesn't equal 'love' now does it?????????? | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 2:00:07 AM | A very wise man once told me "everything will work out", "it may not work out the way you want it but it will work out". Words from my dad.
Mistakes teach us how to handle situations better in the future. Terrible mistakes teaches us better ways to handle ourselves in the future.
Good luck. | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 2:14:34 AM |
Well, that's damned magnanimous of you...
Mind you, it's apparent neither of you cared about each other enough to make it work, unlike this couple who seem to be trying really hard, so just what relevance does your tale of your EX have to this?????? You and your EX are NO LONGER TOGETHER.... Remember, she's sleeping with another guy. This couple however are in love and back together. Do you see the difference? Ahhh, now the light goes on....
Good grief....
Not magnanimous, but grown-up mate.
You don't know enough about us to make assumptions about how much we cared about each other.
The relevance is, that if it ever came about that my ex and I did come back together, I wouldn't have a problem with any of the people she saw in the meantime.
The only difference is the opportunity and timeframe.
Unless you didn't really care in the first place.... 'felt' really doesn't equal 'love' now does it??????????
Don't be so arrogant as to presume you have the mortgage on what constitutes love. You have no idea what my ex and I felt for each other and indeed what the OP and her boyfriend feel for that matter. | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 2:18:09 AM | | Wow you have a harsh crowd here. Well I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years and have had sex other women since. Its ok I'm single and dating. If we were to get back together it would not be much of an issue as this si what she wanted it was a mutal break up. Tou were broken up for a while almost a year. how cna he not expect you to ahve sex in that time frame. what was he doing taken a vow of celibacy? He did not date or have sex with anyone? Come on.... And even if he didn't Still its ntoa big dela its expected. People have to live in the present and for the moment with only thinking breifly once in a while into the future. Thinking about the pst or what could happen or could have cuases uneccessary drama. He has to be able to let it go and think "Oh I'm dating you now and nothing else matters except that we are together." its not like you cheated on him as you were not ina relationship at the time. And told him about it. | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:48:03 AM |
The relevance is, that if it ever came about that my ex and I did come back together, I wouldn't have a problem with any of the people she saw in the meantime.
Frankly I dunno why you're even arguing the point and offering up analogies that are just not relevant and calling them so.
Just makes the arguments stubborn and frankly...foolish.
YOU poster... and your ex parted ways completely. What you guys do is up to both of you.
IF your lives cross paths again...meh...do whatever you want.
READ the fricken OP. Its not difficult...its on page ONE.
The situation with the OP was...
I was going out with this guy for a long time, but I broke up with him.
We kept talking about getting back together
Its English no?
You DONT work on reconciling a relationship and fcuk other people without causing damage. IF you (generic) think otherwise...you're a d!ckhead mate. | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:59:32 AM | | You had your cake and ate it allso so next time you might want a reasltionship with some think about it before you act as no one wants slopy seconds from an old flame. | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 4:14:17 AM | | wow 3 men in 10 months. lol thats almost as many as I have had my whole 41 yrs of living. close ur legs and find some morals. do both you and him a favor and end the relationship. if i were him i would not take u back strictly becuase of how loose you seem to be. no offense. | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 4:15:32 AM |
You DONT work on reconciling a relationship and fcuk other people without causing damage. IF you (generic) think otherwise...you're a d!ckhead mate.
Despite your generic qualification there's no need for insults.
Believe it or not I can read English luv, they broke up and they talked about getting back together. When did they talk? In the first month? In the ninth? How often or long did they talk for? None of us know.
In the meantime she has two relationships and a one-night stand. She doesn't say what he did, but I would suggest a young bloke keeping such company would not be going without for 10 months.
So maybe you should keep your insults to yourself, the OP asked for opinions and she's got them. You can make your point without name-calling. | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 4:34:46 AM | Oh boo hoo.. you broke up were single and slept with someone else.. or even other peopel. Who cares!
This man sounds possessive. You are not his possesion!
He has issues in the reguard your value to him is lower now that you have been with someone else even though he agreed on the break up and let you go. I do believe it was mutual.
He has issues in the reguard other men touched you. You are now smudged.
He is creating new problems by ruminating about you with someone else while he is with you now and the chance to rekindle your romance.
It takes two to make a relationship or reconciliation and two to break one.
right now... its heading for break up as he is holding you accountable making you feel guilty for some sort of warped loyalty and fidelity you should of had for him while you were apart. He is going to make the failure in the reconciliation your fault!!! Beware!
and what if.... HE had met someone he had been attracted to while you were apart? What do you think he would of done? Do you think he would of been as honest with you and told you the truth?
Its a two way street....
The bottom line is....
YOu were apart! You can do what you like you don't have to explain yourself or feel bad about it. That is how you handled the break up and starting dating again. End of story. | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:09:50 AM | YOu were apart! You can do what you like you don't have to explain yourself or feel bad about it. That is how you handled the break up and starting dating again. End of story.
you dont sleep with ur ex's friends. thats her big mistake. some men are just off limits. ya she could have slept with 100 men in 10 months but its WHO she chose that casues the problem. why did she choose his friends? was she trying to hurt him or what. You just dont do that if u have any decency at all. turn the tables ..what if it wree him who slept with all her firends. how would she react? just like him. there are two sides to every story. he is not in the wrong at all but since he is bothered by this mess, he needs to let her go , get new friends caues the ones he has obviously are not his friends, and find himself a good woman. | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:14:06 AM | Despite your generic qualification there's no need for insults. Oh if I wanna insult you...you'll know about it...Believe it or not I can read English luv Ya think...luv....?When did they talk? In the first month? In the ninth? How often or long did they talk for? None of us know. VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVWe kept talking about getting back together
Wanna read it again...two or three times maybe?...do it four...just to be sure.
The word is KEPT.
Here...again...English...
kept (kpt)
v.
Past tense and past participle of keep.
Ya know...continuous...
Lets try it...here's an example.
Every post arguing the point and whining on and on and on when someone is CLEARLY incorrect to perpetuate someone's grandiose ego for the matter of feeling "right" KEPT infact displaying stubborness and stupidity
Here's another way of using it...try it...easy peasy...
I unfortunately misread the OP...instead of admitting I was in error, I KEPT making an idiot of myself.the OP asked for opinions and she's got them She's got mine...and she's clearly got other peoples too...even if they KEPT getting it wrong.
Now until/if or when the OP offers up more information...speculating on what the young man has or hasnt done is also wrong.
^^^ English as well. | |
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| made a terrible mistake by f&&king these other guys ...
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:20:00 AM | sorry honey ,but once sex rears it's ugly head ,there's no going back .
you will never have the same relationship as it will always be a barrier between you .
best to let it go and find someone new ,and put this down to experiance,and dont do this sort of thing again.
once bitten.. etc.
i hope you do the right thing and get on with your life | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:25:00 AM | "A mature, confident man would have no problem with what you did AFTER YOU HAD ENDED THE RELATIONSHIP. Obviously this guy is not."
What planet does that guy live on
I doubt it will fix itself. Sorry | |
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| Will this fix itself?
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:27:21 AM | Subject:
You had your cake and ate it allso so next time you might want a reasltionship with some think about it before you act as no one wants slopy seconds from an old flame.
I remember a time ~ in a galaxy far, far away ~ I could have said that!
But as the years and years of lfe experience roll swifty pass, you come to grips with the roots of turmol, grief and confussion in such matters ~ it is a growing process,
The roots to this problem lie in ~~" young passion" and "ego"
Young passion is so intense and has no boundries ~ all things seem possible!
And "ego" ~~ comes from the pronoun ~"I". I~ being the centre of the Universe.
This events of behavior ~ are very normal occurances ~ but the insecure view this as an attack on their Universe and some how think ~ there is still a way to put the Genie back in the bottle ~ and their Universe will be complete again.
Sorry Kiddo ~~ the Genie won't go back in the bottle!
She's not "your " woman ~ she belongs to herself ~ you do not control her ~ you are only afforded the image that you do ~ this is what she offers you ~ you can only huff and puff and destroy what you might of had a once time.
I speak from an older mans point of view on this matter ~ figure out how it applies and where you are at. ~~~~~~ Dance | |
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