| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 7:20:20 AM | And you KNOW he's ate up with "p*ssy on the brain" because YOU were exactly the same at his age! You know he hasn't got a clue about love or life or the consequences of his actions...
Sorry, we weren't all like that at that age. Hypothetically speaking, if my 15 year old daughter had a steady boyfriend I'd certainly want to sit down and have a chat with him rather than instantly dismiss him as a "snot nosed, slimey little punk with p*ssy on the brain". 
How about stepping up your role as a parent and ensuring she is not given the opportunity or time to have sex at 15?
Erm... How exactly do you propose that would be done without severely alienating the daughter?  | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 7:52:52 AM |
Sorry, we weren't all like that at that age.
Who are you trying to kid and impress with talk like that! Of course we were all like that. Teenage boys have 2 things on their mind -- sex, and how to get sex!
Into sports? It's because they want to impress girls with their athletic ability!
Into cars? That's because they want to have a hot ride to impress girls with!
Into religion? That's where all the hottest chicks are at!
Into making money? Gotta have money to spend on the hotties!
Everything a teenage boy does is because in the end he wants to get sex! | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 7:57:41 AM |
Teenage boys have 2 things on their mind -- sex, and how to get sex!
Wow! Thanks for telling me what I'm thinking! I'm not actually able to process my own thoughts.
/sarcasm | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:07:43 AM | Actually, the smartest possible reaction might be to ask her what she uses them for or what she believes the use to be. If she answers that she doesn't want to get pregnant or catch a STD then that would be the greatest opportunity to point out the failings of condoms to 'guarantee' protection from either of these problems. A great opportunity to cement the bond between you and your daughter and open the door to an in-depth discussion on the whole subject.
Paul | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:10:07 AM | Actually, the smartest possible reaction might be to ask her what she uses them for or what she believes the use to be. If she answers that she doesn't want to get pregnant or catch an STD then that would be the greatest opportunity to point out the failings of condoms to 'guarantee' protection from either of these problems. A great opportunity to cement the bond between you and your daughter and open the door to an in-depth discussion on the whole subject.
Paul | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:16:50 AM |
Wow! Thanks for telling me what I'm thinking! I'm not actually able to process my own thoughts.
And I've had some advice on the forums that I should put in my profile that I'm a virgin. Supposedly there are people out there who'd be willing to change that for me.
I believe that second quote is directly from your profile. Sounds like someone is thinking about sex to me! | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:25:50 AM | Anyone notice that it tends to be the men that are joking about shotguns and reacting badly?
joking????were not joking ...there are two people in this world that i would ....die for /go to prison for/and yes kill for.... they are my kids ..i just told my daughters dates that "prison wasent that bad...i really dont have a problem going back" they never let me know it if they disrespected my little girl....joking me not think so | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 9:06:24 AM | | People don't seem to accept the reality that a 15 year old is physically ready to have sex. In past times, they would have been married and raising babies by that age. Mentally and emotionally they may not be ready for it but physically they are. The body is screaming to reproduce at that age. Not the brain, but the body. That physical drive is strong my friends. You can try and justify and say they aren't ready but that hormonal drive is primitive and instinctual. You don't have to like it, but denying it would be crazy. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 9:50:03 AM | How about stepping up your role as a parent and ensuring she is not given the opportunity or time to have sex at 15? How about educating her and encouraging other activities to increase her self-esteem so that she has a good foundation to say f off to the first little snot nosed punk who tries to get in her pants?? Where have the mothers gone who are to be there to protect their children and instill a sound moral base???? This thread is ridiculous and you should all be ashamed of yourselves for such low base thinking.
WOW, and exactly how do you suggest we 'not give the opportunity or time to have sex at 15'? Chain her up in the basement? But, i do totally agree with you about educating her and teaching her good self-esteem! But does this guarantee that she won't CHOOSE to have sex? Not likely. But at least she'll understand what she's doing, and maybe even enjoy it 
A 15 year old isn't mature enough to deal with the emotional consequences that sex can have...... at least explain why she should wait until she's at least 18. She could get hurt easily by a guy just wanting to use her for sex.
LOL I'm 38 and I'm not sure that i'm always ready for the emotional consequences that sex can have  It's not really an age thing, it's more of a circumstance thing IMO
Anyway, I'm not sure what i'd do in this situation. But i'd probably do exactly what my mother did when she was though LOL...............i'd put a note in her drawer telling her not to be stupid and to get on the pill! (mind you i was 18, not 15)...........but i'd also be proud of her for being safe.
**geez i'm not usually this winded, must be all the coffee lol, my apologies** | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 10:06:45 AM | over reaction is the wORST thing you could do!
Get her butt on the PILL, supply the condoms, give her books, talks etc...on STDS .. HERPES , HIV/ AIDS , all that stuff. Knowledge is power. The more you tell her it's bad, blagh blagh, your too young blagh blagh, the more she is going to do it!
Take her to an AIDS hospital/ housing...let her see what 5 minutes of pleasure w/o those condoms can do to you. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 11:57:56 AM |
WOW, and exactly how do you suggest we 'not give the opportunity or time to have sex at 15'? Chain her up in the basement? But, i do totally agree with you about educating her and teaching her good self-esteem! But does this guarantee that she won't CHOOSE to have sex? Not likely. But at least she'll understand what she's doing, and maybe even enjoy it
well though there are no guarantees...there are some things a parent /parents can do shy of imprisonment....you can keep her busy ...involved in activities ..talk to her ...listen to her ..do things together ...get to know her friends and her boyfriends....most young girls have sex to some degree from being bored ...to get the boys to hang out with them ...to have something to do... give them some of your time ...give them something to do ....and as for her boyfriends ...encourage interaction with boys to a limit ...they crave interaction with the oposite sex and are going to have it with or without your consent ...encourage it and you can structure it ...plus if the boy knows you and has to face you regularly he will more than likely respect you and your daughter more...they may still have sex but you will stand a better chance of making sure that when she does it she is more ready for it....no you cant physically watch them 24/7 but if you get in their head in a good way it will be harder for them to do the things that you want them to refrain from | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:28:57 PM |
People don't seem to accept the reality that a 15 year old is physically ready to have sex. In past times, they would have been married and raising babies by that age. Mentally and emotionally they may not be ready for it but physically they are. The body is screaming to reproduce at that age. Not the brain, but the body. That physical drive is strong my friends. You can try and justify and say they aren't ready but that hormonal drive is primitive and instinctual. You don't have to like it, but denying it would be crazy.
That's true... I wasn't argueing with what all the enlightened folk are saying about educating their kids... I was pointing out that the emotional bonds between a father and his daughter are at odds with her hormones. Has nothing to do with intellectual choices.
And referencing your earlier post (I think it was yours)... Yes, remembering what I was doing with her mother in the back of my van when she was 16 didn't help my frame of mind at all...
over reaction is the wORST thing you could do!
Get her butt on the PILL, supply the condoms, give her books, talks etc...on STDS .. HERPES , HIV/ AIDS , all that stuff. Knowledge is power. The more you tell her it's bad, blagh blagh, your too young blagh blagh, the more she is going to do it!
Take her to an AIDS hospital/ housing...let her see what 5 minutes of pleasure w/o those condoms can do to you.
Also true! But... 5 minutes? What a rip off that would be...
deerdog1.... excellent plan! | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 12:38:23 PM | | I would be happy that she is taking precautions against diseases and pregnancy, but disappointed that she is having sex so young. I would also have a talk with her about having sex so young and take her to the doctor to get on birth control pills. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 4:06:16 PM | | Everything is normal, no reason to panic. Teenagers are experiencing sex at a very young age these days in higher numbers. It is completely normal. If condoms were found it is clear they understand safer practices and a talk may not even be necessary although it might be useful just as a precaution. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 4:28:57 PM | Having ushered two teenage girls through this pahse of their lives. I can only say what I know about our circumstances and how we handled it.
The youngest was dating a guy for the better part of a year, and well, we knew it was going to happen sooner or later. Luckily the youngest had an excellent realtionship with mom, so we knew when it was time to have the talk. And we did, and we made it clear that we did love and care for her and her happiness, what she's going through is natural and whatever she chose to do, we'd support her. We also made it clear that if we thought she was making a bad call - we were going to let her know as well. We went over the good aspects, and the bad aspects of sex, made sure she knew that condoms aren't 100% and that there's things they can't prevent. Then we cracked open the "educational" locker and gave her a few choice books on sex and sexuality and told her that she's free to root around in there and explore as she wants, as well as ask us questions. We aslo made it clear that there's certain questions mom was better suited to talk to about, and there's stuff I was better to talk to about. hehe
As far as the shotgun thing goes, that's typical male protective behavior. Most of the boys the girls brought home we good kids, there were one or two whom I thought were just unsuitable and everyone involved knew it, for the most part as long as they respected me and my house rules, they got a fair shake.
I still remember the time the oldest brought a guy over and he introduced himself by saying "Hey dude". I made it very clear that he didn't know me from Adam, I'm not one of his "buddies", and until such time as I told him otherwise, my name was "Sir" or "Mr (lastname)". | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 4:34:30 PM |
At least she is being safe.
Could be worse, she could get pregnant or an STI.
At least she is being safe.
Could be worse, she could get pregnant or an STI.
At least she is being safe.
Could be worse, she could get pregnant or an STI.
At least she is being safe.
Could be worse, she could get pregnant or an STI.
At least she is being safe.
Could be worse, she could get pregnant or an STI.
Is there a reason you are doing this on all the forums? Do you think it makes you look "cooler" and more "knowledgeable" because you can repeat yourself? | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 4:40:05 PM |
Is there a reason you are doing this on all the forums? Do you think it makes you look "cooler" and more "knowledgeable" because you can repeat yourself?
Actually I think he's posting like that because he's singing along as he types...Not a very catchy tune though...Somebody take that guys guitar and keyboard away! | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 4:52:24 PM | | I would hope my daughter would feel open enough to talk to me when she was planning on having sex. Condoms are good, I would talk to her make sure she knows about double protections...but I wouldn't force any hormonal birth control on her as I don't believe in them for myself. I would also explain, should she have an "accident" she better be responsible for the consquences as I wont be raising it/supporting it, period. Condoms aren't 100% but certainly better then nothing. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 5:31:09 PM |
Actually I think he's posting like that because he's singing along as he types...Not a very catchy tune though...Somebody take that guys guitar and keyboard away!
Any suggestions on where to put them? | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 5:37:04 PM |
Any suggestions on where to put them?
I have a few, but they don't have anything to do with daughter's and condoms! | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 7:40:49 PM | | serenityCW i was forced into by my then boyfriend...i wanted it but wanted to wait and finally i gave into it...its kinda force but kinda not i do not regret giving up my virginity when i did even though it wasnt the choice i wanted to make at that age. i ended up with a disease called H Pylori which morning sickness is a common sign of it but people overlook that and think pregnancy. i was given 5 pregnancy tests in 4 days and had all my blood work done and all that. he got scared and ran. i learned from that experience that guys will not stand by you no matter what..thats why i do not have a child of my own but i do help my boyfriend raise his from a previous relationship. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/18/2008 10:54:52 PM | For an answer to this one look to your parents generation.
Age 16 the boys were considered mature enough to join the army in full blown combat units. They were considered mature enough to hold the scales of life and death in the tirggers of their guns.
Think about it. | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/19/2008 5:09:54 AM | i learned from that experience that guys will not stand by you no matter what.
some guys will stand by you....I never ran from anything i have done ...if im with you when we do the dance i will be with you when its time to pay the fiddler and there are many others like me ...but the ones that run or dont face their decisions ...get the press
i never got any girl in trouble but there were times when there were several close calls...but never was there any thought of running ...and I always let her know from the start that it was us in trouble not just her ...and i would be honored to stand by her whatever happened......when us boys got into trouble /mischief if a friend got caught i would stand with him and take the consequences ....it was a code i lived by that was given to me by my father ..which i never questioned or regretted it...it is one i gave to my son ...and know he has excepted ..yea i have had to get him out of jail when the others have ran and denied involvement..it was possession of alcohol nothing criminal...but still he stood and faced the consequences of his actions ..and made his father proud...even while i was punishing him ...and it is this attitude he presents with his girlfriends...we all are in need of more codes to live by ...very few have codes anymore | |
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| 15 year old daughter and condoms.
Posted: 6/19/2008 5:40:59 AM | OMG.......my daughter turns 6 july 2 is this what i have to look forward to in the future
***saying this as im cleaning an oiling my shotgun***
NO!!! 15 is to young for any girl to be having sex
***saying this as im installing new door locks, window alarms an booby traps*** | |
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