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 Author Thread: I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
 utrinque558

Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 401
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/13/2008 12:54:15 PM
go to australia then !
 weird_revolutions

Joined: 12/28/2006
Msg: 402
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Posted: 7/13/2008 1:08:36 PM
I've been bashed for this same thing myself. I don't have kids but people have told me that I'm not fit to be around their child because I smoke pot. HOW RETARDED!!!!!

This person just needed something to bash you with and that was the first thing to come to mind. Pardon my language but F*** HIM!
 VVendy

Joined: 6/7/2008
Msg: 403
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/13/2008 8:02:34 PM
Water can kill you if you are not careful of how you drink it. Rotted juice dried leaves that you get either over the counter or under the table NONE OF IT MATTERS. Are you happy giving your power over to some plant? I would not be, how ever I'm not you and have no hell to send you to. All I know is that anything you use to help you deal with life is not always going to work try Jesus or sing Dance a chick flick that makes you do not harm your body or think so much about this person that did not approve of you.
 peacefultigress

Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 404
I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/19/2008 8:54:04 AM
There is a difference between nicotine, alcohol and illegal drugs, and that is the chemical reaction within the brain. So a comparison is not real valid without the chemical composition and the reaction within the brain noted. I don't think that smoking pot here and there is bad just like I don't think a drink here and there is bad but if it's against the law and my house could be disrupted because of it...well then it won't be around and it won't be a priority I need to defend in a public forum, such as this.
Nicotine is now in fact illegal in many different places and illegal in most restaurants and bars because of the ill effects. I don't think it's healthy to smoke ciggs around kids, and I think someone is selfish if they do...they can always take it outside.
Hopefully if this mother smokes enough she has a back up incase of an emergency so someone can handle it, same as if someone drinks to much. If someone is to high they aren't going to think well enough to make a call to an ambulance (in most cases).

peace
 Mindsmirror

Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 405
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/19/2008 12:00:10 PM
Oh please, the difference with all drugs, alcohol and nicotine included is in which receptors they activate in your brain. Prescription drugs, caffeine, etc fall into this category as well.

Another fun fact, I hope everyone in here knows that even Methamphetamine is legally prescribed to children. It's called Desoxyn, you can look it up yourselves. The government puts out insane propaganda, but they don't tell you the facts behind the scenes. There used to be a commercial on TV about what was "in" meth. In reality they were referring to what is commonly used to manufacture it, although these things aren't actually in the end product. If they were, Desoxyn would have all of those things in it as well! If you've ever heard of Adderall, that is a mixture of a number of different Amphetamines (Speed for those of you who are unaware). These drugs are given to children! They are far more harmful and dangerous than marijuana, a drug that is literally impossible to overdose on and cannot cause brain damage or physical addiction. Adderall and Desoxyn, on the other hand, are both capable of causing extreme addiction.

Heroin, Diacetylmorphine, is simply a derivative of morphine. It is an opioid, no different in effect from any other opiate/opioid. The only difference is a massive stigma associated with it, it's the only opioid that I know of that is classified as having no medical value, even though that is false. Heroin used to be sold OTC in the US. Oxycodone (Percocet, oxycontin), hydrocodone (Vicodin), hydromorphone (Dilaudid) as well as Codeine and Morphine all have similar effects and are still used regularly today. People claim they're less addictive, but so many people become addicted to any one of those drugs every year it's insane. They all affect the same receptors in your brain, they are all addictive mentally and physically. These drugs are FAR more dangerous than marijuana. When combined with alcohol or benzodiazepines (Anti-anxiety meds, such as Xanax, Valium, Klonopin, Ativan), even in small quantities, these drugs can easily kill you via respiratory or cardiac arrest.

Anyway, marijuana has been shown to have nowhere near the negative effects of alcohol. It is not physically addictive (Alcohol is very physically addictive and withdrawal can actually be fatal in some cases) and doesn't cause the poor judgment that alcohol does. It is 100% propoganda and has to do with taxes and money, that's it. It's all about money you guys, nothing more. I will also submit that anyone claiming that marijuana is at fault for someone moving on to "harder drugs" should take a hard look at what they're claiming. If marijuana hadn't been there, most people that are capable of being addicts would have become addicted to something else, probably alcohol or prescription drugs whenever they first got introduced to them. They have an addictive personality, it's not marijuana IMO, it's them. Lots of people use alcohol and never become addicted or move on to other drugs. Lots of people do the same thing with marijuana. In fact, a lot of people that I knew that smoked it refused to ever drink even one drop of alcohol because it is a dangerous drug. I've never once seen a marijuana fueled brawl btw.

I bet that 90% of the people in here speaking poorly about this woman's choice to occasionally use marijuana drink alcohol. If you drink a couple beers every now and then, that's no different than smoking a joint in terms of the physical and mental effects. It amazes me how incredibly ignorant people are to the effects of Delta-9-THC, and how caught up in the ridiculous propaganda many of these people are. When you smoke a normal amount of marijuana, it doesn't have the effects that being trashed drunk does, period. It doesn't destroy your motor skills, it doesn't impair judgment, etc. I also think people don't have the concept that there are different degrees of intoxication with ANY substance that are dose dependent and potency dependent. As in, two drinks is stronger than one, four drinks is stronger than two. It is the same with marijuana, so just because someone smokes it doesn't mean they are getting totally trashed. I've never understood why people cannot get this through their heads, it is possible to get as "high" off of marijuana as you would be from a single alcoholic beverage. I also don't care if you saw somebody get high once and they did x, y, or z. That's like me saying, "I saw someone drink alcohol once and they beat the crap out of their wife. That must mean you do that too."

As for the people talking about it being "extremely illegal," I beg to differ. At least in my area, anything under 1/2 of an ounce results in a ticket. Not jail time or an arrest, but a TICKET, like for speeding. I have no wish to get a ticket for anything, therefore I don't use marijuana, but it's like half of you can't see a difference in the legality of marijuana vs. crack cocaine.

For all of the people saying, "how can you raise a child and teach them the values of obeying the law when you don't obey it," I have a couple of questions for you. Do you ever speed in your car? If you do, you need to seriously consider what you're teaching your children everytime they look over at that speedometer and see that you're speeding. You can't tell me that you don't break any laws, EVER. You do, but I bet you justify the ones you break as not being a big deal. Well, when that extra 5mph prevents you from stopping in time and you get in a wreck that kills your friends or family, maybe you'll see it a little differently. Smoking marijuana in a safe environment isn't any more irresponsible than having a few drinks. Yes, it is slightly illegal, however, the reason for it's illegality is highly questionable. It is apparent that there are actually racist roots behind the original enactment of anti-marijuana laws by the way.

For the folks asking if she allows her 6 year old kid to smoke marijuana; are you guys insane? When you drink two beers do you give your kids the beer? Why would a responsible adult who smoked a joint do any different? Especially when alcohol is the drug that destroys judgment, not delta-9-THC.

For the people claiming that "drugs are in the air all over the house." Again, you've fallen into this propaganda machine IMO. You've got to realize how irrational you're being. The smoke from one joint, smoked in a separate area (We don't even know that she ever smokes it at home from what I've read) is NOT going to fill a house with so much smoke that anyone in it is going to get high or even have a measurable amount of THC in their system. In fact, it's been scientifically proven through peer reviewed studies that it's nearly impossible to fail a drug test from second hand marijuana smoke. Studies have been done on this because so many people try to claim that when they fail drug tests. It's been show that it is just not possible unless you do something like lock yourself in a phone booth with someone smoking 10 joints in a row and then stay in there for an hour or two.

That's enough for now, but I hope some of you see how ridiculous you sound. You think that your drugs are OK because they're legal, but you actually have no understanding of the real effects of those drugs or others, nor do you have an understanding of the reasoning behind many drug laws. I don't use mind altering drugs besides caffeine, and that includes alcohol, nicotine and illegal drugs, but many of the statements in here are incredibly hypocritical and demonstrate clear ignorance to the topic.
 KissingMan

Joined: 6/1/2008
Msg: 406
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/19/2008 3:41:11 PM
First, I'm brand spanking new to this. The Moderator said to answer the question from the OP or move on. I don't know what an OP is so I'm answering it here.

No ! I don't believe they do as is indicated by most of the replies in here. Some people like to use certain topics as there weapon to verbally and emotionally beat other people up. If you know in your heart that your daughter is not exposed to "adult orient" activities no matter what they are and involve, then no harm no foul.
As an example....if I have a get together and there are going to be children even around the gathering . My rule is no intoxicants whatsoever...period ! Not open for negotiation. The reasoning, should an emergency arise with a child all adults must be absolutely and completely coherent. "Adult orient" activities with children being cared for away from the "adult orient" activity by a responsible completely coherent adult allows us to let our hair down, as it were.
From your post it appears, that is you mode of operation. That being the case, ignore anybody that would ever indicate to the contrary and if I may be so bold as to make a suggestion? Never divulge to a stranger your personal habits if that habit is a habit in controversy, as Cannabis is at this time in our history. If this was anytime before 1942 where you could buy it over the counter in a Pharmacy/Drug Store. It would not be an issue whatsoever.
 traxx1

Joined: 9/22/2007
Msg: 407
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Posted: 7/19/2008 3:58:54 PM
I work the legal field and if Child Protective Services ( CPS ) should get wind of this you may have a hell of a time trying to get your little girl back. Face it, do you love the weed more than your little girl ?? are you willing to risk the fact that someday who ever you buy it from won't tell who his/her buyers are if they are arrested ?? Believe me, if this ever happens you will know what real hurt is like. You sound like a responsible mother but I think you have decisions to make at this time, this must be bothering you or you wouldn't have posted on here.
 1gr8wildflower

Joined: 7/15/2008
Msg: 408
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/22/2008 7:16:53 PM
Hi marijuana mother. I think that other people should just mind their own business. I don't smoke marijuana, but I don't find myself over concerned with the choices of other people. There are many reasons for the things that people do, and I'm not going to assume that they are for the worst reasons. Most people that I have met have done something to deal with stress, and what they've done depends on the severity of the stress. The key element is whether or not they are doing something that is hurting themselves or others around them. The answer to that question is relative to the individual asked. There is no such thing as one right answer in this world. Maybe the gentleman who judged you believes that he is going to represent you on judgement day.
It sounds to me like his comments were more about him feeling rejected than you as a mother. Hope this helps..........The Philosopher
 flyonthewall!

Joined: 3/31/2008
Msg: 409
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 3:48:34 PM

The Moderator said to answer the question from the OP or move on. I don't know what an OP is so I'm answering it here.


OP=Original poster

Regarding the rest of your post, pot is illegal. In a divorce case a parent could lose custody for illegal drug use. If the child was in an accident, being taken care of by a "responsible adult" while mom was out partying, the mother's drug use would be held against her if it came to light (i.e., she couldn't make it to the ER because she was stoned).

People can do what they want, but IMO illegal drug use = bad parent.
 ChocolateNutt

Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 410
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 7:54:42 PM
Yes, I do agree with him.

I know that some people have the attitude that it's no different from alcohol. The difference is that the drugs are ILLEGAL. lol Also, drugs stay in your system for much longer than alcohol does--meaning that your judgment is impaired for longer.

Nutt
 63Blues

Joined: 10/16/2007
Msg: 411
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 8:43:43 PM
Have any of you folks ever smoked marijuana? Ever? So many posters on this thread sound like disciplinarians of the most anal-retentive order. My God people, smoke a joint and put on some Allman Brothers for christ sake! Relax and stop judging. Many people who have never smoked pot are lousy parents. Marijuana is NOT the deciding factor in determining a person's parenting skills.

Personally, I don't smoke weed anymore. But I have plenty of experience with it. Any drug affects different people differently. I'm not defending this woman's smoking habits at all, but I think it's ridiculous to take a morally superior stance on this issue.

And the fact that it's illegal? BIG DEAL! Who Cares? Hanging a person used to be legal. Laws are only symbols for what is ethical. I mean, if tomorrow it was suddenly legal to commit murder, would you do it? I wouldn't do it because I feel that it's unfair and hurtful to the victim..........but not because there's a law against it.

Let's try and combine morals with brains, people..........the two make a terrific match!
 ChocolateNutt

Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 412
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 9:21:09 PM
Hi 63blues,

I just have to respond to your comments.

It's true that many people who do not use marijuana are bad parents for a variety of reasons. No one was stating that everyone who avoids drugs are stellar people--we are dealing with the particular issue of marijuana in this thread.

The reason that it being illegal makes a difference (I beg your pardon, ONE of the reasons) isn't just ethics or morality--oops using my brain here, it's about consequences! This woman isn't a single woman with no responsibilities having a toke--she's a MOTHER having a toke--her actions and choices affect her family, not just herself.

You could sit on your sofa and have a beer and a cigarette with no legal consequences. But smoking a joint, even in the privacy of your own home can have serious legal consequences. These consequences could/would affect her child as well as herself.

The child could be removed from the home, the OP could be sent to jail and the child removed from the home.

This woman has a child she's responsible for, so smoking pot when she knows that it could have disastrous effects on her child's welfare and future IS unfair and unethical!

Also, just because people's opinions don't coincide with yours or people feel strongly on a subject that you feel is mediocre or semi-important doesn't make them brainless.

Nutt
 GreeneyedOCguy

Joined: 9/22/2006
Msg: 413
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 9:35:38 PM
Take it from another Full or almost Full custody single parent, I do not see a problem with it as long as it does not effect the way you take care of your daughter and that you do not nor does anybody else you know do it near her...

I have full cusody of my 10 year old girl since her mom passed away 4 years ago. I do all those things you do and praise you for all you do. It can be so tough being both Mom and Dad as I am. I do get help from her huge family on her moms side. She has 19 cousins on that side. I am not close or friends with any of them but they are good to my daughter.

It sounds like you are doing such a great job with her and giving all the love you can to her. I wish you the best and say hi if you get the chance and wish too.

Scott
 DallasFlier

Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 414
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 9:37:22 PM

And the fact that it's illegal? BIG DEAL! Who Cares?

Who cares, you ask? Duh! Since you seem to not have a clue - the Child Protective Services folks and the courts, who could easily take her child from her, if they discover she's an illegal drug user while being a custodial parent.

Let's try and combine morals with brains, people..........the two make a terrific match!

GREAT idea - you might try practicing what you're preaching first!
By the way, since you (and others) remain clueless, the OP has deleted her profile and disappeared - possibly because it was pointed out that she had her picture posted, town listed and written confessions in this thread of being an illegal drug user while caring for her child! Duh!
 Ferruginous

Joined: 5/12/2008
Msg: 415
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 10:17:28 PM
Marijuana is NOT the deciding factor in determining a person's parenting skills.
It may not be the single deciding factor.
But, it certainly is a major deciding factor.


And the fact that it's illegal? BIG DEAL! Who Cares?
Because there can be a lot of consequences resulting from an illegal action.
Perhaps she could lose custody of her child?
Perhaps she could get a criminal record which would limit her chances of maintaining employment, and providing for her child.


As well as it being illegal, there's also the matter of what this woman's priorities are.
I realise the OP is now gone, but I recall, when she first started this thread, (and I commented on it then) that her profile indicated she used drugs often.
Whether a person is abusing a legal substance such as alcohol, or an illegal one such as pot, I'm a little disturbed to see anyone place a higher priority on their substance abuse, than they do on raising the young child in their care.


If a single, childless person, wanted to wander through life stoned, I probably wouldn't care.
But a custodial parent's top priority should be the responsibilities of parenting. Not getting stoned most of the time.
 Dave011763

Joined: 10/19/2007
Msg: 416
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/23/2008 10:19:38 PM
[Who cares, you ask? Duh! Since you seem to not have a clue - the Child Protective Services folks and the courts, who could easily take her child from her, if they discover she's an illegal drug user while being a custodial parent.]

Dude talk about who doesn’t have a clue. I would say it’s you. I have worked with troubled kids for 18 years and we can’t even get parental rights taken away if they beat and neglect their child. It’s probably because people like you are on the computer making threats and ridiculous judgments of people instead of getting out there and doing something useful with your life. When was the last time you volunteered to help by becoming a big brother or mentoring a kid that needs some guidance? Hey I have an idea go smoke some pot and work on your pickup truck.
 flyonthewall!

Joined: 3/31/2008
Msg: 417
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:12:40 AM

You think she can have her child taken away for smoking pot in her home?


Yep, it happens. In fact, here's a little snippet from NORML's "Report on Sixty Years of Marijuana Prohibition in the US":


Because of harsh federal and state penalties, marijuana offenders today may be sentenced to lengthy jail terms. Even those who avoid incarceration are subject to an array of additional punishments, including loss of driver's license (even where the offense is not driving related), loss of occupational license, loss of child custody, loss of federal benefits, and removal from public housing. Under state and federal forfeiture laws, many suspected marijuana offenders lose their cars, cash, boats, land, business equipment, and houses. Eighty percent of the individuals whose assets are seized are never charged with a crime.


I don't think they'd include this in the report if there weren't MANY cases of parents losing child custody due to marijuana use.


"More and more state authorities nationwide are moving forward to place young children in foster care when they suspect a parent smokes marijuana," NORML Foundation Litigation Director Tanya Kangas, Esq. said. "The theory they are advancing is that marijuana smoking per se, without any allegations of abuse or neglect, is grounds to remove the child from the parents."


In this case a mother was given custody of her child after giving birth, but testing positive to marijuana, but she had to go through a lot of trouble.

http://norml.org/index.cfm?Group_ID=3970

Would you like me to cite more cases for you?
 Vannili

Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 418
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 7:19:19 AM
I don't think that you are a bad mother, don't be bother about this guy comment just move on.
 shieldvulf

Joined: 10/30/2006
Msg: 419
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 7:38:03 AM
I'm mystified by all the posters claiming expertise in child protection and custody matters who apparently lack experience in this area. Or maybe they're too stoned to remember the reality. Talk to professionals in child protection, and you'll soon learn that they routinely do a kind of triage on the many, many reports of neglect and abuse they receive in every jurisdiction. Because their payrolls and budgets are so small and so slowly and meagerly increased, they are forced to focus on the most egregious cases of child endangerment, to rescue those children in most severe and acute danger.

This means that, routinely, parents who spank too hard and too frequently, or who impose odd diets, or keep their kids away from other kids, or don't always use their car seat, or do some other stupid parenting thing, get an advisory letter at most. Child protection workers have their hands full to overflowing with the kids who are starved by their parents, beaten by their parents, raped by their parents, subjected to guard dogs or electric shock or locked in sheds and basements for hours, days at a time. While these folks would like to be able to work with parents like OPie whose judgment is arguable, they simply can't. If they did, other children would die, or worse.

On top of that, I would have thought everyone understands that law enforcement puts no particular priority on finding and charging low level users of controlled substances, especially pot smokers. It's true, as we see on Cops and Dashcam Video, that somebody detained for assault or drunken driving who is also holding will be charged on all available counts, including the ganja. That simply increases their control of a dangerous individual. But cops don't waste their time arresting some kid smoking a joint in the park, let alone in his own home. Cops also have to have priorities, and a cop who hauls in one fuzzytop herbsman after another will hear about it from his sergeant.

I understand that standards of evidence are lower in civil court, where divorce and custody are litigated. So a little hearsay about a lid of muggles might make it into deliberations. Nevertheless, civil judges deciding a child's best interests are not going to pull their robes over their heads and squeal in terror at a bong and a stack of jam band CDs. Seeing to a child's future is serious business, and distorting the process to demonize a tiny cloud of joy would be irresponsible in the extreme. Is the kid healthy, happy, loved, and safe? Case closed. At most, a judge might order substance abuse counseling, but s/he isn't going to freak out like Mr. Mackie. ("Drugs 'r bad, um kay? Because they're bad, um kay? Don't do drugs, um kay? Because they're bad, um kay?")

Look back at all these doomsayers for a second, and you'll see they all say OPie could get in trouble, might get in trouble. I don't think even one of them says s/he knows someone who lost the kid over a dime bag. That's because they don't. They just wish it worked that way. I don't know why. Maybe they need to take a chill pill.

Cheers!

Vulf
 4sumfun_

Joined: 6/7/2006
Msg: 420
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 8:00:44 AM
If you do it in your spare time away from your daughter it's your choice. No child should have to be exposed to any mind altering substance, including alcohol. When a child sees someone they look up to altering themselves with drugs or alcohol, it affects how they view you. "Why is mommy acting so different?" In todays society kids are growing up thinking it is okay to alter your mind when in fact it is just silly. Our children need to be taught that it is okay to be yourself and you don't need to change or act any other way to "fit in", and unfortunately kids today are brought up thinking otherwise. They see enough of it on television and don't need to see it in the home.
I myself, at one time, was a pro-legalization of mj until I realized that I couldn't go a day without it. Today I am clean and sober and my child will have a better chance at a healthy future because of that.
So, in short, do what you will but don't expose your childs inoccent mind to it. If you feel the need to alter your mind, keep it to yourself, and it doesn't make you a bad mother. Do it in front of your child and I believe it makes you not as good of a parent as you could be.
 flyonthewall!

Joined: 3/31/2008
Msg: 421
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 8:03:28 AM
Shieldvulf --

I don't disagree with what you say, however, the mother in question was divorced. If the father at some point has issues with custody or support, the mother's marijuana use will come back to haunt her (provided that the father isn't also a pot head).

No one suggests, least of all me, that her use of illegal drugs is a guarantee that she will lose custody of her child. But in the right circumstances, where her use is found out by local or state officials she could lose custody, or at the very least get ground up in the legal system spending lots of money on lawyers in the effort to retain custody.

In an age where the use of LEGAL substances can get you into trouble, it makes no sense to be using pot. Smoke in front of your child, and you could also lose custody in some jurisdictions (and smoking is also used as a weapon in child custody cases).

If she wants to take that risk, it's entirely up to her -- but that does not make her a good mother IMO.
 Lario

Joined: 5/2/2005
Msg: 422
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 8:08:24 AM
The only problem I see with you partaking as a single mother is that Marijuana is currently illegal. I don't know what state you live in, but if you were arrested for possesion, what would happen to your daughter? Would she be taken in by child services? Is that something you would be willing to risk for weed????

You have a child depending upon you! I'd say your actions are somewhat irresponsible.
 DallasFlier

Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 423
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 8:14:30 AM
I'm mystified by all the posters claiming expertise in child protection and custody matters who apparently lack experience in this area.

Says the "non-profit manager" who then goes on to regale us with FIVE PARAGRAPHS of his own "expertise" on the subject.
Pot, meet kettle...

Did you read the posted excerpts from NORML above? Do you think the "NORML Foundation Litigation Director" above would be worried about it if it never happened, as you claim? I'm thinking she has just a *bit* more experience with it than you do.
 shieldvulf

Joined: 10/30/2006
Msg: 424
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 8:35:35 AM
I assume you're responding to me, fly. It's important to respond to another poster directly and by name, to avoid confusion. If you are, you're only proving my point. "Could," "might," "maybe." Her babysitter might be a space alien, but that's not any reason to fire the kid. A possibility is not a probability, and, despite the likelihood that opposing counsel will throw every book in his trick bag, cops and judges are neither naive nor bound to narrow technicalities, especially when the best interests of the child are the only standard they decide on. That's serious business, and won't be decided on this question alone, not no how.

And Dallas? What? Do you know something I don't? Or have the 'roids flared up? I'd be delighted to read any information you have on the subject. Fly's quotes from NORML only cite one case, in which the pothead got custody. The rest of it is "might," "could," "maybe." I never said, "never," either, now did I? R.I.F., Baby!

As for myself, I've served on a child protection task force, on the boards of a couple of agencies who work with abused and neglected children, and, in my early career with a state agency, worked for years alongside child protection workers, knee-deep in the grisly details. I've talked at length with social workers, doctors, therapists, cops, judges, and researchers in the field. I've read their reports and written a couple myself. While substance abuse is certainly a prominent problem in this area, pot rarely comes up. These days, young parents seem to most frequently get in trouble with meth and crack, which absolutely destroy homes and families. Reefer, not so much at all.

I'm sorry I didn't claim expertise - which I still don't. I would only claim to be active and informed, and to take the question too seriously to guess about it at haphazard. I was pointing out that people who upthread claimed knowledge betrayed a lack of it, according to my years of practical experience in these matters. I'm happy to be corrected on any matters of fact, if you know something. If, otoh, your pouch is all snark, why not put it in your pipe and smoke it?

Cheers!

Vulf
 ritawayward

Joined: 4/17/2007
Msg: 425
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I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 7/24/2008 8:41:18 AM
HAHA I have a crush on Mr Mackie!
Vulf....did you purposely hold off posting till your message was 420?
The Op is long gone and the sentiments pro and con just keep on coming!

I already commented pages ago but I have to agree with Mr Kettle(sheildvulf) I don't dare call him
Mr Pot!lol I ended up dating a child protection worker who was called to my home by a relative regarding
me and a false accusation (about pot smoking while being a single mum).

One look at my home, my child and our rapport with each other and he was disgusted to have his time wasted
by my axe grinding relative.
He then proceeded to tell me about all the cases where he could not apprehend but lay awake wishing he could.
His hands were tied by time, resource and legislative restraints.
What he described is identical to the circumstances Vulf has described. I was glad to have made a new
and lasting friend but sickened by his situation and that of the children he described,
He like, most of his collegues, burns out quickly and has no choice but to take maximum sick leave and
govt provided counselling or he would be out of that work entirely just to stay alive.
This "hands tied"situation makes recruitment for adequate numbers of skilled ,compassionate protection workers impossible!

It is similar in the States, even more so due to budgetary cuts in all areas of Social Services.
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