| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/3/2008 11:54:35 PM | | I say be thankful you got off easy and are rid of the bum. It sounds to me like you take care of your business responsibly and enjoy relaxing in your down time, responsibly. You are an adult of free will and have the right to make the bed you sleep in. | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/4/2008 12:08:22 AM | While I am not disputing that you may be a good mother, the fact remains that you are doing something illegal.
You may be sending your daughter mixed messages. Is it ok to break the law because you feel it shouldn't be one? How do you explain it if you get caught buying/using and get put in jail?
My personal opinion is that when you become a parent, your life gets put on hold somewhat and that your child takes precedence against your own wants. It's against the law to smoke marijuana. If you insist on breaking the law, do it once she turns 18. Why risk having her taken away by either jail time or Child Protective Services?
(I know OP is no longer here. Just a peeve of mine when people justify their illegal actions by saying things along the lines of "it doesn't hurt anyone", or "it shouldn't be illegal in the first place". And that goes for much more than just smoking pot.) | |
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| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/4/2008 7:47:24 AM | I applaud you for being honest! He sounds bitter that you would not date him. I too partake and I am a mother. You are not alone and you do NOT need to defend yourself as long as you are being the best mom that you can be. Like you said, there is a time and a place for everything. Don't beat yourself up over others' judgements. It is not worth the energy.  | |
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| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/4/2008 9:10:18 PM | | It's plain and simple to me. It's bad parenting. My ex let my step kid drink at 16 and that was the beginning of the end of our marriage. To many young people think it's okay because one or the other parent says it is. To many people get hurt or killed because of poor judgement. And it goes beyond the victim. It envoles family, friends and sometimes strangers. You can't think of just yourself. | |
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| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/4/2008 9:36:48 PM | | I wouldn't want to label you as a bad mother per se, but what kind of example are you setting? Pot is illegal - PERIOD. It is not healthy, it dulls your brain, and although you have free choice that does not mean you are making a good one. You could be arrested or worse for this habit. I have a hard time relating to anyone who chooses to do drugs of any kind. It makes me sad whenever I think of friends from high school who are still smoking pot in their 30's & 40's - and knowing they are living the same lifestyle they did then. It seems apparent their pot use has dulled their lives. I have heard the argument that it's better than drinking (and I confess I have never seen an angry or abusive pot smoker) But it seems a poor comparison. It's one thing to fight for the legalization of something you believe in but as a parent I think it is highly irresponsible to break the law. If you want to be the best parent you can be you should refrain unless it is legalized. Just my opinion. | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/10/2008 6:04:19 PM |
all these people telling you it is illegal have no doubt never speeded in their car for example, an act far more dangerous to themselves and others than smoking a bit of weed. just chill you judgemental retards.
God save the Queen........he's got it right.
Lots of angry judgemental people out there........saying it's ILLEGAL.......your BAD
Look in the mirror...........and say you never in your life broke one law..........never told one lie...........so does that make you bad, too? | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/10/2008 11:18:27 PM | Be like any normal marijuana smoking parent and don't do it in front of your 6 year old child or when they need you standing by them sober.
Not like you'd ever harm a child when your baked, maybe you just shouldn't be visibly so in front of her at least.
It's your ****ing business.
If you are getting high all day or every day I would consider quitting for a while. Embrace yourself in the beauty of your own flesh and blood child for a few years. Then maybe come back to it if it hasn't been wiped off the face of the earth by then.
Jackster, congrats on getting sober, any addiction can become a huge issue for some people, but did these "doctors" show you any pictures of this "tar like substance" around your brain? | |
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| I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/11/2008 6:30:18 PM | Realizing that the OP is long gone:
When you have children, you have to be able to differentiate right from wrong, and instill these values in your children. "Partaking" in these illegal substances, your feeble justification notwithstanding, is detrimental to the physical and mental health of your child. You aren't a kid anymore; the time to be reckless and immature is long gone. Remain sober for the sake of your child, or forefeit her to someone who can properly care for her, and not spend hours a day mentally unavailable and physically incapacitated. Same goes for alcohol use... an altered mind is an altered mind.
In this country, marijuana is illegal. Alcohol is not. If you get caught speeding, you get a ticket. Likewise, there are legal ramifications if you get caught merely in possession of marijuana. It's a mind-altering drug; that's why people use it. Same reason why they drink alcohol. Not only are there drug tests for jobs, there are also blood and breath tests for alcohol usage.
That's the law. Accept the consequences of the law, or stop use. Or, leave the country. | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/11/2008 6:41:24 PM | nah not a bad mom... but could be a bad example?
don't know but if i was ever into drugs i would NEVER bring it up infront of my kids or EVER encourage them to do it... my brother did weed for fun and now he is probably close to death thanks to his meth addiction... don't really care, to me weed is a gateway drug and anyone telling kids and youngsters that it is not a bad things and that they should try it is just not thinking hard enough. | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/11/2008 6:43:42 PM | i am afraid i do see the issue as the guy does. i mean, i wouldn't be that mean about it, but i certainly would NEVER date a man that a) smoked pot to begin with (to me, this is what you do when you are very young and in college.), b) had a kid AND was an open pot smoker. this is just my opinion, and i am not trying to be uncivil here... but to me it's just very white trash. very.
why you ask? is it because i am a born again right wing abolitionist nut that wants to deprive other of their good time? nope. it's because it's agaisnt the law. whether you or i disagree with that law is irrelevent. it's agasint the law and when you have a kid THAT can have serious consequences that can jeopardize the life and well being of a child.
what that means is the following:
you could lose your child if you were caught with enough marijuana on you, or in your house/apartment. you could be just driving along in your car and not know that you ahve a tail light out... have a cop pull you over and find some pot...BOOM! you are no longer under the raidar... even if it isn't much they'll be watching you... and you could end up with social services involved in your life...
the bottom line is this: it's just low class. i am sorry to say this to you. again, i am not trying to be disrespectful...i really think you need to grwo up, and start taking your life seriously... you aren't a kid anymore... and doing this is kid stuff!
you can do it! get off the pot and join the grown ups! do it for your daughter and do it for yourself...
lar | |
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Deni31
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Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 463 | |
| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/11/2008 7:26:51 PM | In the moment you chose to do something illegal that could potentially jeopardize your well being or the stability of your child's life (via consequence) you are a bad mother in my opinion. It doesn't mean that the rest of the time you aren't a terrific mother.
Now IF it were legal AND you only smoked on days she was with her father- I see no problem with it as it would not interfere with your parenting. | |
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Gawjuz
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Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 464 | |
| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/12/2008 1:34:06 AM | Hi Dustie... I dont agree with you spoking weed, but i dont think your a bad mother...
To be honest what defines you as a good or bad person.... as long as you love your daughter, which i can see you do, give her the best you can, and you're always there for her.. i would seriosuly not worry bout some guy you have never met and what he said to you.. I think he was probably just angry at you because he wanted to get his end wet..
Keep smiling, as long as you know your a good mother no-one else's opinion matters | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/12/2008 11:14:45 AM | gawjuz~
is jeopardizing your child's welfare by engaging in illegal activity being a good mother? isn't it putting ones petty desires before the best intersts of the child?
keep in mind that pot is illegal. you can go to jail for that stuff. you can lose custody of your children over stuff like this. that is how SERIOUS it is.
i think the OP needs to grow up. and as i stated before, i don't mean to attack her, i just think she is most likely young and has never really thought through the possible consequences of her actions.
if you really love your child you wouldn't take a risk like that. and smoking pot even in your own home IS taking a huge risk...it's a great way to lose you kid...
lar | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/12/2008 11:19:13 AM | So what?
I have been called many things! Only some of which were true! The only things that ever bothered me where the things I knew to be true. Even if they only hit part of the nail on the head! | |
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| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/12/2008 12:08:01 PM | I dated a single mother who was in almost the same predicament, but with cigarettes.
I didn't really like her smoking because of the smell and that (I don't care how much money you have) it takes away from being able to support your child in favour of something that could be damaging. But we weren't married and her daughter wasn't mine so I could overlook the aforementioned.
What I couldn't get past was the 2 of them living in a basement apartment and her smoking cigarettes with no open windows while her daughter had no choice but to breathe in the second hand smoke.
The second that your lifestyle starts to directly affect your kids, you are a bad mother, nothing less. | |
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| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/12/2008 2:23:37 PM | Minor usage of alcohol doesn't carry those potentials.
Fortuneately, you have never worked in a facility that requires "Drug" testing, be it legal or illegal,You get caught with alcohol in your "test" resulis, "YOUR OUTTA HERE"
Enough, said on that.As long as she does "use" around her daughter, as far as I am concerned, its fine with me.And as far as Marijuana,being "illegal€" that was a concoluted law instituted in the 30's by "moralistic idiots.Anyone ever see "Reefer Madness"??????
OK, a couple of questions for the masses.
#1 you know people who drink alcohol? How many have started a fight or gotten belligerent?????
#2 You know pwoplw who smoke "pot"?? How many ya ever see get belligerent or start a fight ???
Yes, I thought soo
LAstly ,I have been smoking pot for over 40 years, never affected my work, or home life.Never smoked it around my children, and they grew up to happy and healthy adults.Mattter of fact, how many of our "politicians" been busted for "hard drugs or worse" ????????? | |
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| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/12/2008 5:25:20 PM | seekingjoy~
personally, i don't think pot is such a big deal. I think it should be legalized to some extent. however, what i think, and what you think does not change the fact that it is illegal. period. because it is illegal i chose not to hang around with people who smoke pot. why? i have had freinds brought up on charges of possision just because someone that was in thier car happend to have pot or some other drug on them when they were pulled over for a routine traffic stop, and they got charged too. i even had one friend LOSE his car. so, that is why i chose not to hang out with people who smoke pot. besides, it's pretty white trash to break the law, get arrested for stupid crap like this. it's right up there with getting in a bar fight, or getting a DUI. it says : WHITE TRASH... period. it says i can't control myself.
this woman is a mother. she has a daughter. believe me, i've seen cases where people have lost custody of thier children over stuff like this. if you have a kid it is completely irresponsible to use any illegal drugs whatsoever. period. again, this has nothing to do with your personal feelings on the topic or mine. it has to do with what the de facto situation is:
pot is illegal.
period.
and if you don't like that law? then go out and work to change public opinion because the majority of americans do not favor the legalization of drugs. until you change public opinion and change the law you are breaking it and the possibility of being brought up on some stupid possesion charge is very real. if you have kids, i hope you don't, have fun explaining why daddy had to go to jail. nothing spells white trash like jail.
lar | |
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| Alternative lifestyles
Posted: 10/12/2008 6:56:43 PM | | I notice a lot of you saying "as long as you don't do it in front of the kid". There still can be consequences to deal with if she gets busted smoking weed while her child is not around that will have some effect on her child. The best thing to do is not do it. | |
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Gawjuz
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Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 475 | |
| I was told I am a bad mother because I smoke marijuana.
Posted: 10/13/2008 6:22:27 AM | Larissan04~
Point taken.. I do not condone people who take drugs, and i myself do not take drugs.. BUT Please give her a break.. Dustie was mereley asking a questions.. she was not asking for every-one to give her the third degree!!!.. age does not come into this... people at the age at 50 are raping young children.. have we mentioned this? | |
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