| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:56:14 PM | twice a week is bullshit. a slump, or insanely busy schedule is one thing, having a girlfriend who withholds sex because she equates it to doing the dishes, something is wrong there.
Sorry Luke...thats the figures...thats life.
Witholding sex? thats not the reasoning behind it.
Fact is...there's only sooooo much you can do without it becoming so fricken boring you start bringing other people into it, getting into swinging clubs or lets throw in the odd animal.
Cos if you dont...its gonna be the same thing 365 days per year for the rest of your life.
See if you'd be happy finding something you like to do...say for example...skydiving (gives an adrenalin rush)...and do the exact same thing every single day for years and years on end. You can flip around all you want in the air to make it look different...but the "rush" wears off. Taking a break and anticipating it...builds that rush again.
The more often people have sex...often "extra" stimulus people introduce into the bedroom to try to maintain the same feeling...and the less they are capable of being satisfied with a "normal" one on one interaction.
Like junkies needing to up their dosage.
You wanna keep a woman satisfied...then let her "want" you a little.
And add other stuff into the equation because you both "want" it as opposed to "needing" it to get each other off.
Mind you...my ex and I...had a better sex life than the "average american" and 7 yrs later were still winning that race ;-)
Quality wins every time. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:59:10 PM | I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt here. You appear to be working on the basis that if your girlfriend doesn't want to have sex with you every day, she is being unreasonable or it is a personal rejection of you. In actual fact, most women don't feel like sex consistently every day. Women's sex drive varies from woman to woman and day to day. It is nothing personal and you would do well to be understanding.
Of course, if your girlfriend went off sex for days and weeks and she wasn't ill, working too hard or looking after demanding children, then it would be reasonable to assume something is wrong. She may be stressed, unhappy with you or there may be other reasons not connected with you, like hormonal variations reducing her drive.
On a day-to-day basis, you can assume that there will be a fair bit of variation. Don't panic about it or feel that you should be complaining just because your mates appear to be 'getting more'. Just accept that there will be some days when your sex drive doesn't match hers and it's perfectly normal. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:00:46 PM | ^ kyn, I dont mind the occassional day off, or lazy **** here and there, just if what you say is true over time...then for sake of my relationshps I am willing to sacrifice and invite other women into the bedroom to spruce things up. Or add visual aides, or freaky roleplay.
I'm kind of old fashioned, but if I must endure such horrors to keep my woman interested so be it. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:04:40 PM |
I'm kind of old fashioned, but if I must endure such horrors to keep my woman interested so be it.
and he is still single, why??!!! | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:06:01 PM | perhaps it's been my past lack of willingness to experiment with threesomes and puppets, and whatever else kyn was suggesting.
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:07:37 PM | I'm kind of old fashioned, but if I must endure such horrors to keep my woman interested so be it
Very noble of you 
then for sake of my relationshps I am willing to sacrifice and invite other women into the bedroom to spruce things up. Or add visual aides, or freaky roleplay
Excellent...nothing wrong with that...but frankly most people dont have time to be setting a fricken scene for a 3 hour performance every night of the week amongst real life things like full time jobs & families. Crazy eh?
And one more thing...introduce too much...seems to me...the only thing your lady wont be needing in the bedroom...will be you.  | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:12:36 PM | i don't think always need 3 hours to have a good time, an hour or so should be fine normally for a worknight, and you throw in the earling morning nookie, and the occasional **** binge on the weekend, you should be having sex more than 2 times a week in a relationship.
maybe when you're old or too busy that's not realistic but for me, twice a week i might as well start seeing someone else if i can. that would just enhance my appetite... | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:21:56 PM | How about inviting another man? Why is it men only thing threesomes involve other women. I'm not into women, so my threesome would involve me with another guy. But most guys don't want to see their women with another man.
as for SCorpio dude, I don't know where you got that research, but the longer I go without sex, the more easily I do get worked up and hit the goal. If I have it everyday some days I can tell you that it's just not going to happen. All women are different.
I know about the younger man's sex drive. I also know that doesn't pertain to all younger men. I almost exclusively date younger men, and very few men have been able to keep up with my sex drive. So it's wonderful to find one who does. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:24:26 PM | How about inviting another man? Why is it men only thing threesomes involve other women. I'm not into women, so my threesome would involve me with another guy. But most guys don't want to see their women with another man.
there are some guys who would really like that, but you're right generally.
I would never tolerate that. It's not like i would really put pressure on a girlfriend to allow in another woman either but if I caught the hint she might find other women attractive I'd go for it sure. it's way more common for women to be ok with that within the confines or a relationship I think. I've ex's admit they'd sleep with certain other women, but pointed out they'd get really jealous to see me with them...so i didn't push it in that case. maybe i should have as the relationships ended anyway eventually | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 6:58:22 AM | srcain.....Your 28 yet all your kids are over 18? (according to your profile).....Me thinks that perhaps you are either getting too much sex or not getting enough sex.
Is it wrong for a guy to expect sex . Yes it IS wrong for a guy to expect sex. What if she has a headache? | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 7:13:10 AM | What's this every DAY crap......??
I want it on the hour, every HOUR..............
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 7:25:39 AM | | instaed of expecting it from her, make it so she wants to do it everyday, or as much as she wants. show her what she means to you, because otherwise you'll make her feel like a piece of meat. instead of us guys getting our rocks off everytime we're slippin into the sheets, try giving her a "treat" with no obligation to return the favor. you'll find out it goes a long way. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:26:34 AM | | there we go strawbs now were talking, my type of women. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:32:44 AM | | the topic isnt about who is getting pleasured or who is controling the sex in the relationship( in which case the person who controls the sex ussually controls the realtionship) it is on having sex daily, i really belive if somthing feels good why not do it. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:38:03 AM | "Only once per day? "
^^^ I love your posts Red, always give me a good chuckle! thanks | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 9:01:33 AM | | OP, the only thing that would be wrong with a guy's expecting it is if he didn't make me want it. In general, though - expectations often lead to disappointment. Nothing turns me off faster than a partner that believes he is entitled to sex whenever he wants it. Just as I would be boorish for expecting that of him. Make sure you do everything possible to ensure she's always in the mood for you, and I don't anticipate a problem. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 9:16:39 AM | | sex would get boring if it was everyday....its better to have gaps in between cause then it feels better due to the wait | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/24/2008 9:18:17 AM | I'll pencil you into my busy calendar. How about 4:55 a.m. daily with Sundays off for good behavior. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/26/2008 12:16:58 PM | 'Expecting' is a bit to formal a term, here....it kind of implies
'..I'm gonna get some....whether I Want some or Not..!!'
How about 'Inspiring'...??
..which leaves room for being Turned-Down'...for a decent Reason..!!
* ..By the Numbers..'..?? *
Why has noone brought up ...* Six and Nine *...!!!
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/26/2008 1:16:30 PM | OP, the part I find most troubling about your post, is this: "then i at least know if she is over sexed the she aint looking for it in other places."
Red picked up on it a little, but this seems to be where your mind is at. Seems (to me) to be a whole lot of control going on here in this statement. If you're worried about her looking for it in other places, just invest in a chastity belt. Because if you're that worried, then you don't trust her. Why would you want to be with someone....whether in a committed relationship....or in a physically intimate manner....every day, for the rest of your life....and you don't even trust her?!
And seriously, do you honestly think by screwing her into submission, she's going to just adore you? Only want to be with you? Won't seek out that initimate bond and connection elsewhere....behind your back? You have a lot to learn, my friend.
*chin down...shakes head yet again...exits Lady Land*
~ds~ | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/26/2008 1:47:35 PM | I could definitely have sex with the right guy almost every day, and certainly several times a day. I love when you think all the little things they do are just so sexy you can't resist.
That being said, I would hope if he didn't get sex one day, or maybe even for a couple days, that he wouldn't guilt me for it. We can only do it when we're inspired, and it's not enjoyable for anyone when it is orchestrated.
You can't expect it and you can't demand it, but if the chemistry is there, i'm pretty likely to want you badly enough that it won't matter really.
To address the bringing another woman into the bedroom, rather than another man...
I kind of get what Luke is saying. It's more acceptable for a straight woman to find another woman attractive, then for a straight man to find another man attractive. I don't know why...that's just the way it is. I guess women are more comfortable in their sexuality, than some men. | |
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| Sex by the numbers?
Posted: 6/26/2008 1:55:34 PM | Wow are you training for the Sexual Olympics.
I like xes as much as anyone but sometimes it's nice to let a little tension build before the next session. | |
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