| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 3:03:48 PM |
Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
That warm and wonderful feeling that you are experiencing is merely infatuation instead of love. The difference between infatuation and love is that infatuation it leaps into your blood, it is accompanied by a sense of uncertainty. However, love usually takes root slowly and grows with time. You must be friends before you can be lovers.
Good luck!!!! I hope you win her heart.  | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 3:08:10 PM | No...I believe that's lust. Love takes time to develop. Sorry OP but I agree with the others, it sounds like you've been put on the backburner. Her previous relationship ended for a reason, I guess she's forgotten why and will learn again the hard way. In the meantime, do yourself a favour and don't wait around for her. She's basically asking you to put your life on hold for her which is not fair. Life is too short!
Best Wishes,
H.A. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 3:25:20 PM | Love is a discipline where two people honor and respect each other's views and desire, it is very much like a contract.
In love is the biological phenomenon that leads to mating, when teenagers say "woah I love her like Joey Lawrence, that is in love"
Back to the question is their such a thing as "Love at first sight", yes , but most of the time when it is in question the question is really "In-Love at first sight". Love at first sight would be the lottery where two people fall in love not because they where meant for each other but because they are both loving individuals of the same variety, i.e. two christians of the same denominations believing many of the same things and holding many values would show up to the love negotiation with the same contract even before discussing it. In love at first site is alot easier because no one bothers to read the contract and they just assume that other person is that idealized person. So in other words to answer your question, in this case love at first site, was not. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 3:28:26 PM | Y e s.....there IS..!!
It seems, though .. that I need to Move...!!!
[That D*** 'Distance Factor' seems to _Always_ get in the way..!!!]
To One coast , or the Other..!!
But, then again...certain *undesirables* have already jaded me against certain western areas...
So...It's either Seattle/Portland...or N.Y./Ontario...!!! | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 3:35:16 PM | First off, she is not your girlfriend yet. So, she can date who she wants. If she is interested she will let you know. She probably was trying to be nice by going out to dinner with you. I am a woman speaking from experience so I am just giving my input on the matter. There is not a such thing as love at first sight but more like lust at first sight.  | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 3:37:52 PM | | There is such a thing as love at first sight, but, be very careful with this one, she is throwing her line out and wants you for a safety net in case HE doesn't come through as planned. You should be dating around also. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 4:03:33 PM | Ofcoares there is ~~ such a thing as love at first sight ~! ~ But that has little to do with whats afoot here !
You are in a tight spot!
You want her? ~ Go get her!
but from what you are telling us ~ she could be a Drama Queen!! We don't know these things ~ or~~ What to tell you! ~
Is she a tight fit? ~ you don't know ? ~ we don't either?
I'd state how I felt at "this moment" to her and make plans to move on ~~ .
too often we get what we want ~ only to find ~ it's not what we thought is was.
Dance | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/1/2008 4:11:09 PM | | No, but you can fall in love with the way someone look's. That's not love that's just physical attraction, and it can be very, very strong. How can you love someone you don't know anything about just going by the way they look. It take time to really get to know someone people confuse lust with love. It sound's like you where taken by how she look, and confuse it with love. If it was me I would move on. Good luck and slow down don't be in such a hurry. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/5/2008 6:01:24 PM | | WOW! She's putting you on "standby status" AKA Just in case it does not workout with the person she really wants to be with. Your an option for her, not the chosen one...my advise is to just move on and don't be a victim. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/5/2008 6:13:35 PM | I believe there is such a thing as 'like you a lot' at first sight. Love takes time to grow and it doesn't take much to knock it off the rails.
In any case, if things don't work out with the ex, and there must be a good reason he is the ex, you would be the rebound guy. She knows how to get in touch with you, but I wouldn't get my hopes up too high.
Pink | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/5/2008 6:59:55 PM | yeah. I never fell in love my whole life, though I have loved deeply, and then the love at first sight thing happened.
WTF kind of disease this is, I don't know, but it threw me at the feet of a man who needs to be adored by masses of women, and he is.
It's kinda funny how it took an instant for the love to disappear. I spent a long time wishing it away. Then suddenly, it was gone. I don't hate him, but I sure as heck don't love him anymore.
Love at first sight is real and it is crippling and unexplainable. I know in my heart that the man I loved had value, it's just that he couldn't see his own value to such a degree that he could not stop himself from destroying every relationship that proved he was worth a dam. After being crippled, healing came pretty easy for me, it's just sad that I had no power to heal him. I was pathetic. Now he is. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/5/2008 7:40:12 PM | I do believe there is such a thing as love at first sight. Then time is needed to determine if it is indeed true. People almost always are putting on their best early on in any relationship. As time wears on our defenses weaken and we start to expose our true selves. Sometimes something(s) is discovered about another person that creates doubt or further confirms love.
A former boyfriend, huh? Of how long? Is he the father of a child of hers? If he were an ex husband or a boyfriend with significant history, they might truly deserve to give each other a chance to work things out and you should bow out gracefully. If not tell how you had fallen for her suddenly, that you feel that she did the wrong thing and finally tell her goodbye and tell her to have a nice life without you in it. For heavens sake brother, do not wait on this one. She is not the one for you, since as a leopard can't change his spots, she is the type of person that uses someone like you in attempt to influence the emotions of yet another person. How would you feel a year or so from now if you were to win her over her current ex, then you become the current ex and then enter the next sap in line that she shuts down to give you another chance? Cut your losses now. You have very little emotional time invested in her, she shouldn't be that hard to get over. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/5/2008 9:34:26 PM | I'm sorry to tell you, but no there is no such thing as love at first sight. How could you possibly love someone you don't know anything about? Falling in love with someone takes time and i personally don't think it takes a week lol. Then again i've never been in love before so who knows.
I really think that you should move on. I don't think that was very nice of her to tell you that her ex boyfriend is back but not to give up on her. It sounds to me like she wants you as a rebound. If things won't work out with her boyfriend then she has you to fall back on and that isn't very nice at all and it isn't fair to you. I just think she's cruel for doing that to you so is it really worth it to hurt over someone like that? | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/5/2008 10:53:14 PM | hmmm, so she wants both of you guys.
yes, you fall too soon. but, Im a romantic person and I fell at first sight b4. Its a very beautiful thing and there is nothing wrong with it.
now I dont think falling at first sight is a problem, the problem is what you want to do when you know the current situation. I would step aside and cool down first. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/6/2008 3:27:52 PM | Where high emotions are involved you can't expect rational objective evaluation to be taking place at the same time.
The facts are, you enjoyed a brief encounter that showed you nothing whatsoever about the qualities you would want for a partner: stability, reliability, honesty, ethics, coping skills, communication skills, financial responsibility, compassion etc.
Other points are: she chose to communicate by text which is an act of cowardice , insensitivity, immaturity and plain bad manners. Then she further insults your dignity by expecting you to either chase her or wait in the corner. She sounds like a drama queen you can do better, there are simply more people to chat up at the pool. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/6/2008 4:40:34 PM | She's definitely giving the signal that she is otherwise preocupied. Let her go. Don't persue her. If it was meant to be, she will come back into your life at a later time, when she is available. She is clearly saying she is not available.
This has happened to me several times when an ex came back into my life, that I was still interested. Current love interests were dropped until issues were resolved with the ex. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/6/2008 9:23:31 PM | | Yes there can be love at first sight but usually just love of the look like when you see clothes ect that you like then you strate putting your ideas of a mate into this image you have it is not the real person.It is lust and fantsy and made more intense by the fact she is not avaible to you.Sure court her if you must but do not commit,keep busy go out with friends date and meet new people as much as people want to hope they can make someone love them you cant.Good luck on your quest for love and I hope you work it out well | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/16/2008 11:06:23 PM | I have to say, the most amazing thing has happened to me. I am a divorced mother of two older children, and have met the most amazing younger man on POF. Truly amazing. We've only known each other for just under 3 weeks, but I can honestly say I am falling hard for him. I have always dreamed of having a man treat me this way..I am professionally employed, athletic, kind, caring, intelligent, but I seemed to have attracted the unemotional men in the past. I met this man (7 years younger) and instantly - before we even met in person..we had intense chemistry, so much in common and heavy feelings for each other. When we finally met in person...we were instantly drawn towards each other..the magnetism, chemistry and appeal was overwhelming....euphoric... So much in common..both of us sharing our experiences iwth our children. I believe after meeting this man, that there is love at first sight..although I have not yet told him...I believe....this to be true. For ONCE in my 35 years of life..can I say..I believe in love at first sight. AMAZING...thanks to POF..I have found the man that I would LOVE to spend the rest of my days on this earth with.
xoxo | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/17/2008 8:53:29 AM | | I used to believe at one point but now I don't know anymore. I thought it was love at first site until that person decided to disappear on me without a trace. | |
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| Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Posted: 7/20/2008 8:53:30 PM | Love well it could be but would not know it until you get to know the person, Lust well maybe heck yea it is chemistery, the attraction to another being. Sometimes if you have a photo and chat and talk on phone and get to know a person that way without meeting for awhile, once you meet and touch and kiss it could literlly be love at first sight! It just depends on what is love to you, and of course if the other person feels it too!     | |
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