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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/24/2008 10:10:01 PM |
I can not see a valid reason why this gate should be opened.
This gate has been opened a long time ago. Do we not have a "special" board for those over 45 years of age?
And a "special" board for single parents?
This is at least as unique of a situation as any of those circumstances in my book.
OFCB | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/24/2008 10:18:55 PM | ^^^^^
oh give me a break
seriously...
can you not see what kind of door this would open
keep in mind, in all REALITY the target demographic you are suggesting is rather small.
call me silly but i think a lot of users are over 45 years old, or single parents
there is a big difference from having a forum that applies to a large number of users than a forum targetted to a very small demographic
using your "logic" perhaps we should have a vegetarians forums or a gamers forum, bbw forum, cougar forum, big busted babes forum, etc etc. (just example i've actually seen people make before)
heck .....
i think you'd have more users that would respond to a
i love football special forum
than a Special Needs/Disabilities Forum
either way, admin and moderators have always responded the same to each and every small interest group trying to demand their own forum with a "not gonna happen".
This would also give people with special needs a chance to mingle and get in touch with each other
dare i even mention how this would be a huge violation of the rules
forums are not meant for mingling chat
in fact, chat threads are grounds for being banned | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/24/2008 10:39:44 PM |
using your "logic" perhaps we should have a vegetarians forums or a gamers forum, bbw forum, cougar forum, big busted babes forum, etc etc. (just example i've actually seen people make before)
There is one major problem with your theory OP, ALL of the "things" that you have listed above DO NOT hinder them from communicating "normally". Therefore, you are taking your apples, and trying to compare them to the orange that we have here.
OFCB | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/24/2008 10:49:45 PM | This is just my opinion from a forum perspective. I would tend to disagree with the idea of a such a specialized sub forum and I'll go on to explain my reasoning. I, however, would endorse a profile item to lessen the degree of rejection or at best, make the search more accommodating to people with disabilities.
Having a specific forum devoted to such pursuits (as well as any special interest groups) is fundamentally against the purpose of their being in existence. Although the fostering of relationships is a byproduct of forum participation, it is not their prime function. Their prime function is simply an exchange of information through discussions on a wide variety of topics. They are not meant to be a venue for promoting one's physical self, but rather one's intellect (or in a lot of cases, lack of it, but I digress on that point).
If the prime function of the forums were to directly form relationships, they would need to be heavily moderated to keep out, for a lack of better word, the lurking and trolling idiots that inhabit every walk of life. A free site simply does not have the "human" resources needed to be dedicated to such monitoring, unfortunate as that is. As pointed out, the discussion of disabilities within the forum construct is still viable, as long as there is no direct promotion of one's self. Such allowances would simply lead to what was disposed of ages ago - a chat house.
Bottom line - the forum proposal doesn't meet with forum design or intent.
-Discuss the matters of special needs within the construct of a viable thread.
-Advertise yourself through your profile and e-mail.
If anything a more useful profile item would be the allowance to disclose such items and search on them -a hell of a lot more useful than car and smarts.
This however, would not be an easy implementation, and again, in my honest opinion from past site feature experiences, would be botched from the get go, if the right people experienced with such matters are not consulted with. Disclosure and the right to privacy are paramount with such a profile item and the "feds" would be all over the site to ensure it would be up to "code". Apart from whether the self identification is even visible or not (like income level was), to what level of granularity do you disclose? and then, if you add a mail/contact restriction, it too has to go hand in hand with the granularity of the disclosure (e.g.. what types of disabilities are you willing to accept, mental, physical, both, what would they be). You then run the risk of the race/ethnicity debacle, the body type nonsense etc. - This is not an overnight thought process. Make it too high level and it accomplishes nothing but perhaps to block all special needs individuals. Make it too granular and it too would accomplish nothing. Be aware that only 16% of Canadians deemed themselves to have some form of disability, and that figure included reading glasses!
Bottom line - the ROI of a fractional percentage is not going to garner a lot of resources thrown at it.
One key statement from all the posts was that "dating sites", even for people with no form of disability are tough to crack, let alone for people with disabilities. The site tries to limit the "I can't get through to anyone because of restrictions" syndrome and something like this would make it that much worse for some. It might be easier to find a site that exclusively caters to such needs.
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 12:47:06 AM |
keep in mind, in all REALITY the target demographic you are suggesting is rather small[/unquote]
Try 10-20% of the ENTIRE population. Likely a bit higher here as many people with disabilities have more difficulty reading social clues than the average population. It may not be the majority but it is not a small number either. Many people's disabilities are not instantly apparent. That does not mean they are not there. People with disabilities often are able to lead 'normal' lives but that does not mean they are not affected by their disabilities.
I think the idea of a forum is fantastic but I would not want to see any sort of filter on the profile. Not only would it cause a dilemma for many people but I don't think the admin would want to get into the nightmare that is classification! | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 3:17:01 AM | He's having a really hard time, obviously, garnering any sort of attention from the female persuasion.
Welcome to the real world.
There is no space on a profile to select a special need.
The Interests section is perfect for this and many of the other requests for new categories if only people would use Interests to its full potential. Some already put Interests to good use, such as these adventurous folks:
http://www.plentyoffish.com/interests/swinging.aspx | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 7:36:16 AM | I don't mean to discourage anyone from using this website, but if a person feels a strong need or desire to mingle with others that may have, or share, a special trait: maybe they'd be better off using webstes that were designed for the specific group of people, rather than using a large website designed for the general population.
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 8:40:50 AM | Lots of good points and a few bad ones. First, people with disabilities tend to minimize their issues often because they feel it segregates them from society so that figure of 16% with corrective lens is obviously dead in the water because I'd pin the figure for those who wear contacts or glasses at higher than that alone. Someone else mentioned 10-20% of the population and I think even the low end of that spectrum may be a little high but if you included people who considered themselves socially inept, having social phobias or severe anxiety, and so on this number rises exponentially. We've been trying to sell the idea of a special needs site to this individual because I do feel that is the best bet here but a) they are pay sites and people with special needs don't generally have a wealthy flow of income to toss around liberally, and b) the best site I researched claimed to have just hit a thousand members. A thousand! In the world! If you do the math you are highly unlikely to meet anyone even close to you of the opposite sex and then you have to try and make a connection with that person if there is one available! The numbers on this site are much larger and the purpose of this forum is less about uniting those with special needs but more to give them a platform to help them deal with issues relating specifically to their plight.
Can you imagine what would happen if I posted a thread in sex and dating asking how I get women to give me a blow job, because I have muscular dystrophy and am confined to a chair, thus get no real looks from women? A man in his 30s asked for a profile review about two months ago who was in a chair and he wanted to make his profile attractive so that he could attract women for sex. That's all he wanted. It turned into a spectacle and there aren't that many idiots in the profile review forums! Plop that sucker into the other forums and they'd eat him for lunch! He'd likely want to hang himself after because his self-esteem would have taken such a hit. I posted a thread in Dating Experiences asking for information, stories, or advice from anyone who's either autistic or who has dated someone with autism and already a half day into it there are two boys poking fun at the topic, and I'm not even special needs nor did I ask a strange question!
This type of a lateral forum would be completely different than a race, religion, culture, or special interest forum as people in any of those sub-categories have the mental capacity and mindset to deal with life's issues. Those with physical disabilities do as well but I rarely lump someone with a physical disability into a special needs category. They are able to get around and function generally. | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 8:54:50 AM | I don't think the OP is aware of the Forum Rules and the Requirement to address Topics for Discussion, and I wonder what a "Special Needs" Forum Category is going to achieve along that line.
Further, Special Needs is not a Topic, but a Public, and would likely end being nothing more than People talking about themselves. Secondly, its very likely should such a Category be created, its not going to be long before other Interests come knocking on the Door also requesting basing Forum Categories on themselves.
Thirdly, this Item is not big enough for its own Category, and that can be evidenced by the existing Threads on the same or similar Subjects. I believe there are far more Threads on the Weather alone.
 | Just make a Thread in the Off-Topic Forum Category along with a Topic to discuss the Special Needs of your Choice. |
This gate has been opened a long time ago. Do we not have a "special" board for those over 45 years of age?
And we have been trying to get rid of them for Years because they contribute little more than Chat and Off-Topic Posting. This is a Forum, so if you are looking for a Place to chat, you are in the wrong Place.
This would also give people with special needs a chance to mingle and get in touch with each other
This is not the Point of Forums. Use your E-Mail and Instant Messenger to contact People. The entire Rationale for this Request is completely baseless, as nothing has even been proposed how and what Type of Discussions ought to take place.
Sorry, but all I see here are those with a particular Interest in their Obliviousness as to what constitutes a Forum trying to create a Chat Medium.
There is one major problem with your theory OP, ALL of the "things" that you have listed above DO NOT hinder them from communicating "normally". Therefore, you are taking your apples, and trying to compare them to the orange that we have here.
That is nevertheless not a Criteria for creating a Forum Category. Again, wrong and immaterial Reasons for one. We don't create Categories on the Basis of ---> "Hindered from communicating "normally". If they cannot type E-Mails, they certainly cannot post on the Forums. Nonsense.
Can you imagine what would happen if I posted a thread in sex and dating asking how I get women to give me a blow job, because I have muscular dystrophy and am confined to a chair, thus get no real looks from women?
Whether you have muscular dystrophy or not is irrelevant, you can't use the Forums for Contact Broadcasting. And that's the Picture you are not getting. This is Discussion Board, not any Medium that centers its attention on a particular Interest Group.
Further, a Paraplegic looking for a Blow Job has nothing to do with Dating. Expect this Site to be run over by Hookers looking for them.
A man in his 30s asked for a profile review about two months ago who was in a chair and he wanted to make his profile attractive so that he could attract women for sex. That's all he wanted. It turned into a spectacle and there aren't that many idiots in the profile review forums!
That has nothing to do with Forum Categories, but the usual handful of Trolls being banned from Site daily. But then we can't comment on it since many Disabled blame the World for the Condition they are in often attacking other people too.
I posted a thread in Dating Experiences asking for information, stories, or advice from anyone who's either autistic or who has dated someone with autism and already a half day into it there are two boys poking fun at the topic, and I'm not even special needs nor did I ask a strange question!
You will pretty well find that in most Forums, if not far more in many others. Further, you seem to be asking for special Exemptions, kinda like polarizing Threads where possibly some Opinions that may irritate or upset a Disabled Person can be used to accuse other People of Trolling. In other Words, watch what you say around the Disabled, because they are so frail. Sorry good Padre, this ain't no Model for no Forum. |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 9:43:58 AM | Deuce, you're all over the map on what you're asking for, and it's not helping things.
You started with:
We feel a forum specifically for people of special needs, be it physically, mentally, emotionally, or what have you, would be beneficial to all in question because it would give them a place to feel accepted and to talk about issues relating directly to their problems, without having some people ridicule them as they are ignorant to the issues that present people with special needs.
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This group of people is different than ethnic people, per se, because they aren't at the mental capacities that lay folk are generally, or they have to deal with specific physical issues that we just can't understand.
Right off the bat, I'm leery of the phrase 'emotional special needs'. Many (most?) can be worked through if the person is willing to put in the effort -- phobias, as one facile example. Yes, in the extreme form they can be crippling, but they are quite literally 'all in your head'. Trauma of any sort (stress disorder, rape trauma, etc.) are equally debilitating while they are present, but (and this is my personal key point) they can be healed. For that reason alone, I put them into a separate category from things like physical or mental conditions -- things that it is not possible to 'work your way out of' and must simply be tolerated, lived with, endured.
But that's okay because you never mention 'emotional special needs' again. In fact, your next posts make it clear that you are talking about 'special needs' as it is used in the common vernacular - e.g. mental/developmental disorders.
I've also had this situation likened to race, religion, and culture and that if we had a space for Special Needs folk then we'd need one for them too. That is NOT the case because while they have unique plights and issues they deal with that we don't have to sometimes they are able-bodied or -minded and understand the logistics of life. Those with special needs often don't.
People with special needs need to be fully informed and constantly reminded sometimes of the dangers and perils of life, and they should be taught to protect themselves.
Then after dropping 'emotional special needs' you seem to even be excluding physical special needs:
The difference here is that a wheelchair does not render someone mentally deficient or socially inept. It makes things logistically difficult sometimes but otherwise they function as you and I would and often in much greater capacities. People with mental disabilities do not have this weapon at their disposal...
And putting the nail in that coffin:
This type of a lateral forum would be completely different than a race, religion, culture, or special interest forum as people in any of those sub-categories have the mental capacity and mindset to deal with life's issues. Those with physical disabilities do as well but I rarely lump someone with a physical disability into a special needs category. They are able to get around and function generally.
So it would seem that request -- originally all-inclusive and open to those with any type of 'special need' -- is now specifically narrowing on those with intellectual or developmental needs. It has moved from one end of the spectrum to the other. As the moderator said... how do you play it? If you bust it wide open down to the level of 'physical disabilities' such as astigmatism, then you run the risk of trivializing the issue and making it so broad as to be useless. On the other hand, if you make it specifically for those with serious disabilities of one form or another, do you really have a viable target group?
Also, unlike many of the other forums, 'special needs' is such a grey area that it might be impossible to regulate. 'Being 45' or 'Being a single parent' is a boolean choice: you are over 45, or you're not. You're either single with kids, or you're not. Despite the fact that I am functionally crippled without corrective lenses, I would not participate in a 'special needs' forum because I do not consider myself challenged in any way by this physical disability. (This is why there can be ~35% of the population needing specs, but only 16% calling themselves 'disabled', btw.)
Lastly, people lumped together in a single forum should be able to talk to one another and discuss the issues... but unless you slice the audience thin then there's no commonality of experience to share. Other than the fact that they both have handicaps, what does an 18 year-old quadruplegic male have in common with a 48 year-old woman with Asperger's Syndrome? What advice could either one of them offer a 28 year-old woman with OCD, or a 30 year-old with crippling agoraphobia? They can offer support and encouragement... but that's not what the forums on this site are designed for, so that sort of interaction is completely out-of-scope.
In the abstract, I like the idea being presented here; who wouldn't? After all, it seems like there's no cost to throw up another forum right? And if it can potentially help them, then aren't I a bad person if I oppose it? I spent a long time working with the USENET newsgroup creation process in the 1990s (boy I'm dating myself), and I have seen all these arguments play out again and again when this group or that group wanted to 'divide the namespace' further. I have examined these issues from all sides, and there are a lot more complications in the practical execution of a proper newsgroup (or in this case, forum) than most people ever think of. Right now, as much as I like Timothy as a person and wish him the best of personal luck, this does not seem like a viable way to split into sub-forums; TrappedOnBaySt seems to have a good handle on why.
EDIT: Dang, spend an hour writing a complete and thoughtful post, and get beaten in both timing and relevance by a site moderator. Well, I'm leaving it up anyway. | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 10:16:53 AM | The fact remains: There is a Need
The only persons qualified to determine that are the ones affected. It’s that simple. Tim, is there a need? | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 10:27:27 AM | Clearskies, ask the homeless person on the corner if he has a need. He will tell you that he does. So do you personally clothe, house, and feed him? Why not? He has a need, and you have the resources... why shouldn't he be able to demand them from you?
Just because one person/side/faction/group says that something is needed does not make it the responsibility of someone else to provide it. | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 10:30:27 AM | The fact remains: There is a Need
There may be a "need" but does that mean it NEEDS to be on plentyoffish.com?
I think not.
Does it mean pof must provide it?
I think not.
I highly doubt if some guy called Tim or Bob or Marysue comes in and says "yeah I need it" that POF is gonna say okie dokie then. POF doesn't work like that. Funny how free and wild some users are with someone elses resources (message boards, mod hours, bandwith, etc)
As for someone saying it doesn't cost anything to throw up another forum, for that I will have to respectfully disagree, especially given this thread where some people clearly misunderstand the purpose of POF. Its not here for chat threads or about me threads. A forum that would be prone to that would require more man power to moderate. Frankly, I don't think any of us have the right to demand that of the moderating team as they have enough to deal with as it is.
The question has been beaten to death previously with other "special interest" groups and the answer always remains NO. POF has said no to alternative lifestyle messages boards, no to gay/lesbian message boards, no to bbw message boards and so on and so on. You can say its not the same thing as much as you want but clearly the mods disagree with you. Frankly I trust the mods to be more knowledgable about this site than some member(s) with an agenda.
The moderators have already addressed this in this thread and once again the answer is NO and it was explained quite clearly. My only confusion is why people don't seem to understand what the moderators have said. Call me silly but I don't think this topic is up for debate and by getting Tim or Bob or Marysue to come in and plead their case is not going to do anything to change the FUNDAMENTAL GOALS AND PURPOSE OF POF. | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:20:01 AM | I ask why we have humour threads and cooking threads. What about this laundry list of threads that add not a single snippet of benefit to dating:
-Science/Philosophy
-Sports
-Art/Music
-Religion/Supernatural
-Politics
-Health & Fitness
-Technology and Computers
-Travel
-Stories/Creative Writing
Somebody please tell me how any of those threads there benefit the users of plentoffish in terms of dating, romance, and the pursuit of love and happiness? They don’t. They are generic chat forums. Questions about the rise and fall of communism have nothing to do with dating, and in fact politics, religion, science, science fiction, and history are five of the top ten worst conversation topics among women. I believe that is printed at the bottom of every message you send on POF.
I don’t intend to push this issue much. I just figured I’d put this out there and let people discuss it. Like everything there is going to be opposition and cynics will find reason to poke holes in even the best laid plans.
The moderators have already addressed this in this thread and once again the answer is NO and it was explained quite clearly. My only confusion is why people don't seem to understand what the moderators have said. Call me silly but I don't think this topic is up for debate and by getting Tim or Bob or Marysue to come in and plead their case is not going to do anything to change the FUNDAMENTAL GOALS AND PURPOSE OF POF. Since when does anyone tell a free public when a conversation is over or not? The point of forums are to discuss issues, questions, concerns. This conversation can go on as long as people choose to speak out on this issue, in support of either side. Personally I'm not much interested in discussing it at great lengths any longer as beating a dead horse really has no enjoyment for this cowboy. | |
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~Rox~
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Joined: 1/2/2008
Msg: 41 | |
| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:27:21 AM |
Somebody please tell me how any of those threads there benefit the users of plentoffish in terms of dating, romance, and the pursuit of love and happiness? As long as the peeps are honest in their posts, it gives you an insight to what they are like.
This is probably as good as it gets...cheers
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/search.aspx | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:36:02 AM | Somebody please tell me how any of those threads there benefit the users of plentoffish in terms of dating, romance, and the pursuit of love and happiness? They don’t. They are generic chat forums.
They are General Topic Categories, meaning any Discussion in respect to a Subject falls into one or more Threads in that Category.
You seem not to have the faintest Clue between the Difference of what Chat and what a Topic is.
Like everything there is going to be opposition and cynics will find reason to poke holes in even the best laid plans.
| Its simply not a well-laid Plan, as illustrated in my Post above. |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:40:16 AM |
-Science/Philosophy
-Sports
-Art/Music
-Religion/Supernatural
-Politics
-Health & Fitness
-Technology and Computers
-Travel
-Stories/Creative Writing
Somebody please tell me how any of those threads there benefit the users of plentoffish in terms of dating, romance, and the pursuit of love and happiness? They don’t. They are generic chat forums.
... which is why they are either in the "General Discussion" or "Fun Stuff" sections of the forums. My understanding of your proposal was that you were looking for something in the "Love Stuff" part of the forum... something like 'Dating with Disabilities' or somesuch, right? | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:42:21 AM | I'm lobbying to have a Special Needs Forum created in the GENERAL DISCUSSION PLENTYOFFISH Forum. This would also give people with special needs a chance to mingle and get in touch with each other
you are lobbying for a chat house is what it will boil down to - we've already noted several times as to how discussion of special needs can be accomplished.
-Science/Philosophy
-Sports
-Art/Music
-Religion/Supernatural
-Politics
-Health & Fitness
-Technology and Computers
-Travel
-Stories/Creative Writing
... are not chat houses, but forum topics.
Somebody please tell me how any of those threads there benefit the users of plentoffish in terms of dating, romance, and the pursuit of love and happiness?
No where is it stated that the intent of the forums is to "benefit the users of plentoffish in terms of dating, romance, and the pursuit of love and happiness"
This conversation can go on as long as people choose to speak out on this issue, in support of either side
When an issue has been beaten to death and spoken to as to why it isn't viable - we can certainly close the circular discussion.
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:48:52 AM | Would a special needs forum not be general topic discussion as well?
| No, not in the Context of a Forum Category. |
Feel free to make a Thread on it in the Off Topic Forum Category.
Already been answered above, very first part of my Post, as well as numerous Reasons cited.
It won't function as one, since its based on a Public, not a Topic.
I am not going to recycle what has already been posted because you didn't read or understand it.
This would be a common Reason why Mods close off Threads because the same Points of Discussions circle around like a broken Record. |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:51:20 AM |
... which is why they are either in the "General Discussion" or "Fun Stuff" sections of the forums. My understanding of your proposal was that you were looking for something in the "Love Stuff" part of the forum... something like 'Dating with Disabilities' or somesuch, right? Honestly I couldn't care where this type of forum got placed if it was approved. The point was that it would give them a place where they know they could go and get information or ask questions or discuss topics of circumstance similar to that of their own. If you want to know how to make a GOOD loaf of bread you wouldn't post in Off Topic or Dating Advice... you'd go to the Cooking section, and the same with help with your wireless network. Frankly with the prevalence of gamers on this site I'm surprised there's no gaming quadrant on the forums! LOL In my eyes this idea was for general discussion thread and not specific to dating, although that is the main problem I feel that those with special needs encounter here. But it seems to be a moot point anyhow.
^^^I did read and fully understand your points, as well as TOBS'. I've long moved beyond those as other holes have opened up in the argument here. | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 12:13:07 PM |
The point was that it would give them a place where they know they could go and get information or ask questions or discuss topics of circumstance similar to that of their own.
- and couldnt that exact same logic justify having a forum for every special interest group - what again makes this different?
Since when does anyone tell a free public when a conversation is over or not? The point of forums are to discuss issues, questions, concerns. This conversation can go on as long as people choose to speak out on this issue, in support of either side. First of all, because this is a free forum does not make it a free for all. Secondly, POF makes it pretty clear that they control how long a discussion will go on. I'll answer your question directly though - since when, well since its a privately run site the people running can do what they see fit - thats since when. It would be like someone coming into your home and saying, well I'm here now and I'm gonna do and say whatever I please. Uh uh - your place, your rules and you dictate what you see fit. Ditto with POF - their rules their decisions. Bottom line, just cause YOU feel it should go on forever doesn't make it so.
In fact, I bet by midnight today, you'll see this thread locked.
I am not going to recycle what has already been posted because you didn't read or understand it.
This would be a common Reason why Mods close off Threads because the same Points of Discussions circle around like a broken Record.
AMEN BROTHER TICKETORIDE | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 1:21:59 PM | I don't understand why people are speaking out against a disabilities forum. If it's not something that would interest you, DON'T LOOK AT THE FORUM. It's as easy as that. I agree with the poster (Deuce?) who said we have forums for things like cooking, politics, etc. How much interest do the cooking forums generate? I think a disabilities forum might generate more, and I've been around these boards for about a year and have seen many, many disabled people trying in vain to find others with commonalities. It seems daily that I see someone in the profile reviews section asking why women/men don't respond to their profile and is it just because of their disability? Or people trying to talk about dating in a wheelchair in the Dating section and having others just not get it or say careless and often hurtful things in response.
The only argument against a disabilities board would be what one lady who said she was a mother of two disabled kids said about it making it easier for people to pray on the disabled--I had thought of that myself as the only argument against the forum being made.
This individual in question whom Deuce and several others mentioned was all over the boards asking for help. He is disabled. Many people did not realize that and were taunting, cruel and unkind to him. They were frusterated that he asked the same questions over and over again, and virtually told him to go away while harshly reminding him of the "rules". He posts in the wrong boards. He doesn't take advice. He repeats his boards and his questions. If there had been a board for him to post in, I don't think people would have been as unkind to him.
Shame on some of you people, who are forty, fifty and sixty, for making fun of an autistic man on a message board. An eight year old should know not to do that, much less somone my dear old granny's age, like some of you whom I saw laughing at this individual. Mocking his typing patterns. Reporting him and his threads over and over so that his cries for help ended up deleted.
It bothers me that people are objecting to this board's creation, and it bothers me that I've seen good posts deleted, but if you look up some of these individuals threads, you'll find rude, cruel remarks that were not deleted.
I expect this thread may well be deleted too, but I wanted to put my cents in anyway. This guy is a loving person and we want to help him. And he isn't alone; I've been contacted by at least three disabled men, and seen many more on the forums. | |
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| Special Needs/Disabilities Forum needed!
Posted: 6/25/2008 4:33:56 PM | I don't understand why people are speaking out against a disabilities forum.
... and sadly given all the reponses as to why not, you probably will continue
The first step is to actually "read all moderator responses with respect to how forums function and what they are for, and NOT for, and what was asked for.
The forums are not for the congregation of a single set of users, they are for discussion purposes of a topic - that's it, not to chat, flirt, hook up and spam what a great catch you are. Read these Acceptable Use & Posting Rules.
I think a disabilities forum might generate more, and I've been around these boards for about a year and have seen many, many disabled people trying in vain to find others with commonalities.
Many?, and that would be what percentage? - as irrelevant as that is - the forums are not about the expose of a set of users - again.
This individual in question whom Deuce and several others mentioned was all over the boards asking for help. He is disabled. Many people did not realize that and were taunting, cruel and unkind to him.
There are reporting avenues for that - did you make use of them? Here is one ADMIN: Forum Rule Violations Report Thread.
It bothers me that people are objecting to this board's creation
Again, it's not about the objection to people with disabilities, lock in on that thought, but how the forum would be used - it makes no difference what special interest group it would be. There are avenues to discuss issues related to that topic matter.
If you want to know how to make a GOOD loaf of bread you wouldn't post in Off Topic or Dating Advice... you'd go to the Cooking section, and the same with help with your wireless network
As no one said that issues or topics relating to disabilities are forbidden, it makes no difference where they are (other than being blatantly posted in a wrong forum) , they are searchable by thread subject and can be found incorporated in many Specific Forums. if you Learn to use the FORUM Thread Search Tool
To re-iterate, it's Not about the discrimination of a group of people, but more of a site manageability, usability and numbers viability. The forum would more than likely turn into a chat house, a forum for pity and attention seekers, and would attract the bashers and trolls - case in point, look at the Single Parent Issues Forum, countless pity threads and bashers galore that we have to continually clean up.
Incorporate any topics into the regular forums and if the topics are geared around a health issue rather than dating/relationship issue, you have the Health and Wellness Forum, or simply the Off Topic Forum. Key to any thread success is to give the subject a proper title.
We don't make the decisions, but with every special interest group or subject matter request that comes along, we give you the reasons as to why they may or may not work. Eventually it is up to Admin. In this case, the intended ask of a place to hangout for people with disabilities is not within the current construct of how the forums are intended to operate - even if it's strictly Issues based, the numbers won't sustain it. This is no different than asking for a special forum for a particular culture or race due to specific issues they may or may not face, and those numbers would far supersede the numbers for People with Disabilities.
I expect this thread may well be deleted too
it may close very soon, but it will not be deleted ...
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