| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:44:35 AM | Men do not care what a womens body looks like. Lumps, bumps and all. Honestly. You are all beautiful .  Please believe us. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/3/2008 1:59:00 PM | you know i was thinking about this whole line and something hit me in the old parrothead. if i do get naked with a lady i hope that the anticipation of the moment and the feelings i have for her would be something that would show through and maker her more comfortable. if you wait to get naked and care about who you do it with then the whole insecurity thing should go down some.  | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/3/2008 3:22:14 PM | Feeling insecure naked ?? ... Well, turn the light out. Geez. How difficult can that be ?? Besides ... a few busted toes and crushed noses on door frames in the dark will soon solve the insecurity problem.
cdn guy | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/3/2008 6:32:21 PM | | My ex was a very pretty woman, but she had a very hard time believing that she was even though I would tell her everyday how beautiful she was. We spent a lot of money on beautiful lingerie and I had no problem with that cuz I got to go into the changerooms sometimes and have a show. To be honest though the lingerie didn't make her look any better. She was the one that made the lingerie look good. The moral of the story for me is that she felt better in the frilly stuff and if that's what made her feel good then that is what is important. Plus it's always a bonus to unwrap a lovely package before getting to the good stuff. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/4/2008 6:32:09 PM | Men do not care what a womens body looks like. Lumps, bumps and all. Honestly. You are all beautiful . Please believe us.
Thanks JB.. I tried to say this but you made it sound much better.. I have found this to be true.. very true.. and to add to it.. a plain woman who will respond to a man is far more appealing to him than a gorgeous woman who won't.. it is our response to them that makes us beautiful..
So gals..lets revel in our own beauty..
I recently dated a guy who made me feel so beautiful.. and feminine.. his male essence was so strong to me.. and I found myself responding to his maleness.. He was not macho at all but he was just himself and I found the woman in me enjoying being a woman around him and I cherished our times together.
What is it that Warren Beaty says in Shampoo about how he loves woman.. he said he loves how they smell,how they feel, everything about them.. well that is how we ladies feel about being with you guys. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/5/2008 6:00:14 AM | What great responses from the guys on this thread! (women too!) It is encouraging to know there are men who are interested in the whole woman and accept and love them in their bodies just as they are. Of course, let's remember this isn't true for all men. Many men (and a fair share of women) are looking for some "ideal" body, even over 45. But I'd like to think the men on this thread represent a growing majority of men who are emotionally mature and can love a woman despite her figure flaws and maybe even appreciates her soft round a*s and belly.;-)
I do think in western culture that men are taught to objectify women's bodies rather than relate to the whole person and it takes some personal growth to break out of the conditioned response. I, like most women I know, am drawn to all kinds of men in all kinds of bodies. When I am with a man who excites me mentally and spiritually, in addition to physically, then I am turned on to making love to him and his specific body. The body of a beloved partner is so special, dear, and desirous that presumed "flaws" slip away, or at least recede in importance. As a matter of fact, something seen as a flaw can be endearing when our heart is open to loving. As men here have responded, it is clear there are men who feel the same -even if it is simplified to "YIPPEE, I'm with a naked woman and she is all mine", lol.
By the way, thanks to everyone who is contributing to this thread. I've been feeling really disheartened by some extra weight and wondering if this was a good time to meet new men. While I will still work on eating and exercising for health and comfort, I am feeling encouraged by your comments here and will try to stay open to new possibilities. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:23:59 AM | ok boys and girls, let us put this in the simplest of terms......
you gotta bloom where your planted, most of us cannot change who or what we are, we are who we are, if we are fat or thin, large breasts or a big willy, thin waste or a bountifull belly, we is who we is, we need to stop looking at ourselves through the tv, or magazines or the internet, if somebody is interested in us, don't question why, just enjoy, our body, no matter what is only a container for the real person inside, the real you, and that's all that really matters, we put on clothing to hide, we put on personna's to hide, we lie to hide, we hide from others we hide from ourselves.. I guess I'm a nudist in the purest form ( or am I lieing to my self ? ) but clothes do not make the man... or manacans would be | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/5/2008 1:36:49 PM | Green Sangha, dont try to stay open to new possibilities, but stride out into the beautiful world and embrace them ( hug a few people along the way too).
I was looking through some old magazines before recycling them as unsellable for charity. I thought to myself that a lot of the 'middle aged' women who were shown in pictures looked rather old and unattractive. But crickey, I was thinking about women of my own age. What was going on? Women in their 40 s and 50 s nowadays look very attractive and still young. Then I realised, besides my momentary lapse into shallow thinking, public attitudes and perception had changed even over just 3 decades.
The average waist line has changed too, over time, and it's my belief that most men simply dont notice what women consider to be serious flaws in their appearance. We are accustomed to the curvier lady now and some of us men even select curves over slenderness.
Do women instead of been influenced by media and fashion as we suppose, actually get locked into a thought cycle based on their mother's ideals and beliefs? It wouldnt be too difficult for a woman to avoid the majority of media, unless she worked in a newsagents, and who needs tv nowadays. Would our test subject freed from media bias manage to learn self love regardless of her shape or would those ideas fixed by her mother still prevail?
Or in a manner less reminiscent of some radical 'O'level Sociolgy textbook I'll state it this way.
The majority of women now in the western world have at least a few pounds surplus to immediate nutritional needs and without changes in diet and transport habits that trend will continue. We men are erm well men. We actually rather quite love women. If they all come with extra padding - so what. We'll happily accept all of it. What we don't like so much is all the negative self image accompanying the diet and fashion industry. So ladies, love yourselves as you are and so we men will too.
love and peace
hug someone new today 
regards from 40, defender of the faith, the weak and the ridiculous. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/5/2008 9:37:19 PM | I guess the answer would be to keep your clothes on while making love until your self image improves a little.  | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/5/2008 10:27:41 PM | Well first off I'm not a insecure woman at all! I'm quite secure , I look in that mirror each day and like what I see. I work at making my self better each day and no I'm far from perfect but I have high self esteam and there is no issues with my body I am what God made me to be. I hope my mate will see the inner and not so much the outter part of me , that he will appreciate me mind , body and soul and not be shallow and love me for me! I have no problem standing naked in front of the mirror or standing bare naked before my mate letting him look at me , but I want him to know there is more to me than just my naked body and I hope he has the mind to win my body and take my heart and hold it and cherrish me the way I am and love me just for me!
Nice to know that not all men are PIGS!!! meaning shallow but there are ones with kind HEARTS too in this singles world we all live in and are apart of.
Thank you to the gentelmen for there kind remarks.
Great Post ...Thanks to the Author for creating it.
Peace and Love everyone I'm out good night 
Yours,Brenny
" A REAL PERSON WILL LOVE YOU FOR YOU NAKED OR NOT". | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/6/2008 4:04:18 PM | DC, you wondered about lingerie for the over 50 woman ...
If you just learned it in recent years, and are over 50 also, can I assume we can still wear it without looking like we are trying to be 'youngsters'? I have no idea what the guys our age want/like.....my last guy wasn't into it, but he doesn't necessarily speak for the majority....right?....or not? Just curious.
First, 'recent years' for me pretty much refers to the past 10 or 15 years.
I'm sure that, just with clothing styles, a person must be selective about lingerie style. Sure, there is beautiful lingerie for every age. I look at it as part of the grown-up play things: some days, I just want to be practical & other days are "dress-up" days. Sexy lingerie has enormous power. It can make me feel sexy even if nobody ever sees it.
And, the way that my life is going right now, thank goodness for that power or I have a whole lot of useless lacy stuff.  | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/6/2008 6:00:45 PM |
Sexy lingerie has enormous power. It can make me feel sexy even if nobody ever sees it.
And, the way that my life is going right now, thank goodness for that power or I have a whole lot of useless lacy stuff.
Ms. Vida, I am sure that with your gorgeous smile and powerfully sexy lacy stuff your life will be everything you want it to be. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/6/2008 6:20:39 PM | You are so beautiful
To me
You are so beautiful
To me
Can't you see
You're everything I hoped for
You're everything I need
You are so beautiful
To me
You are so wonderful
To me
You are so wonderful
To me
Can't you see
You're everything I hoped for
You're everything I need
You are so wonderful
To me
You are so beautiful
To me
You are so beautiful
To me
Can't you see
You're everything I hoped for
You're everything I need
You are so beautiful
To me
Joe****r - You Are So Beautiful To Me | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/6/2008 8:28:42 PM | Sexy lingerie can be extremely exciting. Age is something we get caught up in and I heard a story about age that really gets it right - Sachel Page was a black baseball pitcher who was an all star dominant pitcher in the black leagues before blacks were allowed into Major League baseball - finally he was allowed to play in the Major Leagues and at the age of 49 he was still a very dominant pitcher - the writers of the day interviewed him about his age and they said "Satchel, how can you still be such a dominant pitcher at the age of 49". He replied, "if you didn't know when you were born " how old would you be".
You are as young as you feel and act and sexy lingerie worn by someone who feels like they should wear it is fantastic.
I like the clean smell of someone, soft skin, gentle caress and lingering kisses. It doesn't have to do with age of looks or weight, it has to do with everything else.
You're getting your feet wet with your new lifestyle so good luck and go at your pace. I'm a couple of years into it and still haven't figured out my pace.
Jim | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/6/2008 8:45:53 PM | | First of all, if this is guy is doing what he supposed to do; you'd trying to catch your breath you shouldn't time to thin until you'all are done...Secondly, never take off your clothes, let him do it...maybe help him a little depending on the location or situation. Now, if he expects you to undress, invest in some candles. Obviously if you're taking off your clothes, he's doing something to get you to take them off; or do you feel that you're obligated to do so because he's gorgeous. Better check your status with this guy, he just might be passing through, because he knows big girls need love too, but have to marry you. Do you encourage to take showers showers or bubble bath together. Do you find him looking the other way when you're nude. When I'm loving my woman, I check and explore everything...I wish well | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/7/2008 8:49:58 AM | | if i was a fat bird lying on a beach i would park me bike up her crack,or get save the whale to push her back into the sea!!! | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/7/2008 4:44:46 PM | hello Green,
We all of us are affected by the beautiful people we encounter. Yes the perfect bod....is really hot. That is irrelevent in real life, it is only a fantacy, like a photo in a magazine, it has no reality in my life. On a cold winter night a picture showning a hot beach in a tropical country has no reality.
When I am with a woman, it is because there is something about her I find interresting. The perfect bod would very quickly become tiresome if there were no connection on other levels.
I'd guess this is true of most people.
I think there is some difference between the path men take to find that connection generally and the path women take but we are looking for pretty much the same thing in the end.
I really wonder why you are surprised that the men who have been responding aren't only focused on T&A. Most men I know are spending time with women who are not physically perfect, and they seem to be content with that. I think women are more uptight about trying to reach the ideal than men are about finding that ideal. Most men are realists. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/7/2008 9:32:22 PM | I had to take a job in retail so I see couples shopping together all day long. I've noticed that lots of very good-looking men have wives who have obviously let themselves go and then there are some very pretty women with husbands who are merely average. Physical perfection is obviously not what keeps people together especially when one person in the couple could easily find someone much better-looking than their spouse. Most people just want to live their lives with someone they have common interests with and they're happy to be with someone they can go home with and do whatever makes them happy whether it's feeding the birds, landscaping, cooking on the grill, or cleaning out their pool, etc. I'm sure most of the apparently happy couples I see don't both look good naked.
I think that when we're single and older we're concerned that too many men do still expect a physical perfection that just isn't possible as we get older. After all, we're not with men who have loved us for years and probably still carry around the image of how we looked when we were much younger. I've mentioned before how my dad never stopped telling my mom how pretty she was even after 50 years and he truly meant it. It was also kind of funny to hear him talk about the first time he saw her. (She was on her roller skates and the way he described her wasn't politically correct. )
A guy several years older than I am emailed me today and said he was still looking and said he guessed he should just give up and take anything he could get. What he didn't like about me when he met me was that I don't color my hair. If the one thing I get compliments about from both men and women of all ages was something he thought I should change, then I can't imagine how horrible he might think it is for a woman to have some excess fat around her mid-section since that also might give a clue to her age. I sure wouldn't want him to see me naked and find out. I know some men's words come out all wrong, but really, settle for whatever he can get? I don't know if that was directed at me or just a general recognition that he might not be able to attract the pretty young women he wants who don't need hair dye. Some of the things that some men say does nothing to reassure women that they can take their clothes off without feeling a little insecure about it. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/7/2008 10:55:32 PM | the simple fact of the matter is no one can look 20 when they are pushing 50, well not without a team of cosmetic surgeons and personal trainers.
To all the ladies out there, I say don't sweat what your body looks like. By the time you are getting around to sharing that part of you, you should be in a position that you have developed some level of affection and fondness for each other. I seriously doubt a mature man is going to expect that you have Jessica Alba's body at 50. Heck, most of you didn't have it at 25.
Madison Avenue and Cosmopolitan have made American women so darned obsessed with their body that it has inflicted a great deal of psychological damage that is left for us poor guys to deal with. Get over the guilt and learn to accept and love yourself for who you are. We don't want perfection, we don't expect it. There are many more important traits.
And honestly, true beauty comes from within, when you show yourself, your weaknesses, your vulnerabilities and your imperfections, that is what is truly endearing anyway. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/7/2008 11:54:32 PM | I'm not an avid fan of reality shows normally, but being too ill to care what came on tv, I happened to catch "Looking Good Naked" or "How To Look Good Naked" ...anyhow, the show revolved around woman with low self-esteem who were feeling insecure about themselves and their bodies. It was interesting that with the help of professionals they were able to work through their self -esteem issues and look at themselves much more positively. One thing that struck me was that things we may view as imperfections are not even noticed as such by others....
I would not have had the courage to take off all my clothes and pose nude for the camera much less my naked body be viewed on the side of building by hundreds of passerbys...no way, I don't have that much confidence haha
...maeflowers | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/8/2008 5:37:50 AM | | Miss Mae? I too have seen that show. I have to say it is wonderful! The way they get women to feel so good about what they have! Once they reach that conclusion their lives truly change. Why is that? Cuz they radiate their inside feelings of being positive on the outside.That is one reality show that I think is truly worth it's weight in gold! | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:30:42 AM |
One thing that struck me was that things we may view as imperfections are not even noticed as such by others....
... and sometimes they ARE noticed, but instead of imperfection, they can be exactly what someone else is looking for. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:20:33 AM | | Hell yes all women are beautiful fully clothed or naked. A size 2 or 22 as long as they are well kempt gorgeous. I don't know about all other men but I know the guys here in the office when we talk about women it's not about their bodies but the performance as well as their out going enthusiasm. | |
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| feeling insecure naked......
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:25:41 AM | Do men analyize and scrutinize our bodies while making love?
Yeah! What is your point? | |
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