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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:11:38 AM |
You know a woman would NEVER invite a man out on as many vacations as he would or even one. That rule wouldn't work.
EXACTLY | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:13:49 AM |
I don't know what type of women you have dated, but I have paid for vacations, meals, and whatnot for my men. I sent an ex-boyfriend on a $3,000 golf weekend with his buddies for one of his birthdays. I HATE golf, but he loved it so I booked and arrainged everything for him. I took another boyfriend snorkeling in Florida, when I had the urge to go. I paid for that vacation even though my boyfriend at the time wanted to pay for it. There is quite of long list, but I did not keep track of everything
come one now..we all know that the majority of women dont do stuff like that..sure some do..but most dont..its simple..your argument wont prove anything.. | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:54:49 AM | seagull, your argument illustrates something awfully unpleasant, which is that, when you invite a woman out, you want your money back! It's no invitation at all!
A date is a social engagement, not an investment. If you want to invite out only women who will take pains to reimburse you, you're free to limit your choices like that. After all, just as you don't deserve reimbursement for duties you take on when you invite someone somewhere, women don't deserve your invitations. They'll be fine without them.
Personally, I hope you and other fellas keep on whining about what a pain it is to pay for a woman's entertainment. You make it quite clear that you expect another payoff altogether, that her amusement is supposed to make a chattel of her, a backup for your good right hand. I guess no one has told you that a gentleman gets his money's worth in his guest's enjoyment and company, that a gentleman never burdens his guest with obligations. If he did, he would no longer be her host, she would no longer be his guest, and it would no longer be a social engagement, but merely a financial transaction for services.
In comparison, I look so good standing here picking my nose!
Thank you!
Vulf  | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:04:25 AM |
come one now..we all know that the majority of women dont do stuff like that..sure some do..but most dont..its simple..your argument wont prove anything..
Of course we do. In relationships we pay for activites just like our men do.
I've paid for vacations to Europe, and even entire houses. I always apply each to his or her means in a relationship or marriage. I was wealthier than my deceased husbands, so I paid more (a LOT more). My boyfriend is wealthier than I am, and so he winds up paying more. It just sort of flows, and no one asks the other to pay for things. We are both generous and have manners.
That's a whole lot different than being asked out on a first date. If someone asks me to an activity I don't expect that they will also ask me to pay for it. If we got to the end of the dinner, movie, or show and he asked me for money, there's not going to be a second date.
It's not the money, it's the intent.
I'd rather have a man invite me to a walk in the park, then to a fancy dinner and then get his calculator out at the end of the evening. That shows a kind of character that I'm not interested in cultivating in ANY kind of relationship, much less a romantic one. | |
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| Who Pays for the Vacation?
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:09:30 AM | Like other posters have said, this is more of a serious lack of communication issue than a breach of some mythical dating code of ethics.
The OP mentions that she's been seeing the guy for a couple of months, and that they are EXCLUSIVE...
If you've been seeing the guy that damn long, are you still going to try and hide behind the "whoever asks, pays" double-standard? If you're in an exclusive relationship, the days of first impressions and trying to show you appreciate someone's initial company have passed; you two should be on pseudo-equal footing as far as interest and relationship efforts are concerned, or you're just wasting each other's time... 
Granted he asked you to go away with him on vacation, but if you're so financially-deprived, then a LOGICAL, MATURE, grown person would have established the financial particulars in ADVANCE before any tickets were bought. You don't book a $2400 expense on a whim without ironing out the facts first, and if you're the type that does, no wonder you're "tight on money at the moment"... 
Please note though that I believe the guy is at fault as well for not iterating his intentions towards the financial aspect. As far as my opinion is concerned, you're both silly and thus deserve one another...  | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:30:54 AM | "seagull, your argument illustrates something awfully unpleasant, which is that, when you invite a woman out, you want your money back! It's no invitation at all!"
These people are scorekeepers and that is why they date the people they do. Why would a generous and decent person waste time on a scorekeeper? I say just hire yourself a professional and you know EXACTLY what you are getting from your date since you paid for it up front.  | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:43:45 AM | ok...
1. you are tight on money and you still spent $500 on just your tourist activities. thats a waste of money.
2. surely you realized if half of the other bill was $700 then he spent $1400 and along the way, you didnt even think to ask him, why he is spending $1400 and not expecting you to pay? you shouldnt assume you will get a free ride like this.
i mean come on, if you need money that bad, he should loan you a few hundred to help you out financially, and if you thought he was paying all of it, why would you let him do that, and make you feel bad that he is paying your way, to make you feel like you owe him.
and why didnt you ask in advance if he wanted you to share the costs?
he should have gotten the money up front if he wanted you to pay half the whole time.
also, you shouldnt be going to a hotel if you arent married, you should know that sin gets you into a lot of trouble.
even if you didnt do any sin , you should avoid even the appearance of evil.
and who's airmiles covered it? | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:45:25 AM | hey whoever this woman is, i wana date her.
if she will pay my way, thats great.
but she should understand something, she says, this boyfriend, and that boyfriend and the list goes on and on... seems like doing that didnt get you anywhere huh? | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:46:03 PM | | No, he should have told her all possible costs before the flight happened. | |
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| Who Pays????
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:19:35 PM | *-This thread is Closed and Done To Death. Don't Start another. Instead, if you are wondering about the answer, peruse the dozen or so closed threads and look for one in there. Don't bother anyone else. Here's an answer. You pay. Now go. Sheesh! -TheMadFiddler-* | |
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