| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:24:59 AM | Had a lot of the previous in my time, this is the latest.......
 wtf ! | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:22:50 PM | Not sure about lame but how about this for a chat up email.....
Well I'm within the age limit you ask.But Barnet been there many times my lovely cousin Shirley is sadly now in your cemetary we were like brother and sister hence my visits and an old Navy mate of mine used to live there.Sorry to sound morbid which I'm not but just thought I would add the Barnet factor.If you fancy writing I would like that.
I can hardly contain my excitement at the prospect of a first date in Barnet Cemetry looking for his cousin  | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:43:05 PM | ^^^^^^^^^
You can go in my place if you want ............. lol | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:43:32 PM | Opened another can of poffy worms OP 
To the potential Barnet cemetary date.. you lucky girl you.
Lame messages?
' u r 1ft gul how bt it'
'I nice man. you writ me'
'u r a milf' - and then some more nonsense.
Nice messages? Same must go for both the lasses and the lads of any age.
'Hi, I liked your profile' (then maybe add whether you liked their photo/smile/whatever).
A brief couple of lines about yourself. Keep it friendly, keep it honest, keep it polite and light and you will get messages back. Don't sue me if you don't though! But those are the nicest kind of messages to receive.
Lame messages deserve no response. | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:44:31 PM | | Oh my God Anngeldelight nearly peed myself there do you think he thought that sounded deep and caring in his head. When in reality he should stop conversing with the voices in his head. | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:12:45 PM | 1.........Wot size are your boobies...
2 ****!!! wtf
3 go and play on the main road!! wtf
4 my****is hard do you want to rub it ...........mmmmmmmmmmmm!!
and others to weird and weirder to mention!!
i think they get mixed up a bit .................after id read 1 ,2 and 3 the sender identified himself as someone id never met........then blocked me!!!! weird!!!  | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:15:27 PM | nearly peed myself at this one
bet your good in bed i can tell by your eyes.
what the hell do you reply to that? | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:17:10 PM | | lots of women want spontaneity and surprises on a date, what is wrong with Barnet cemetary? Ive never been, it would be a first! | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:23:24 PM | lots of women want spontaneity and surprises on a date, what is wrong with Barnet cemetary? Ive never been, it would be a first!
And a chuffing last! how do you know he is not some weirdo that wants to strip naked and dance around graves chanting?.
he may be a disciple of beelzebub and have a rams skull, not to mention a goblet of lambs blood at the ready but life is full of surprises and opportunites, dare we overlook them in a risk averse culture? is this not to our detriment ?
Thats funny but at the same time oh so disturbing!.Some freaky dude at a cemetry at midnight with a bunch of flowers in one hand and a sacrafiial goat in the other..yikes!!. | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:28:24 PM | there is that possibility kath, he may be a disciple of beelzebub and have a rams skull, not to mention a goblet of lambs blood at the ready but life is full of surprises and opportunites, dare we overlook them in a risk averse culture? is this not to our detriment ?
admittedley its a hell of a first date but at the same time original! | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:29:04 PM |
And a chuffing last! how do you know he is not some weirdo that wants to strip naked and dance around graves chanting?.
So now she has a date and potentially someone who wants to strip her naked too. That's doing better than I am
Mind you I should stress I'm looking for a lady so if a guy emailed me and said that I'd run a mile | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:38:20 PM | Spoilsport! I was about to fill your box!
I am at the moment defending any messages that I may send - while the beer fairy is driving me!
Infact I think for a week, I am going to purposely send out 2 first contact messages everyday and make them as bad as I possibly can!
Worse then i normally do - I think "ya don't sweat much f a fat bint!" should cover all the bases - I will report back! | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:41:04 PM | | ^^^^I would love to see the results. | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:45:38 PM | | I got one saying "nice tits" , basstards Im not that fat , | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:24:32 PM | I can hardly contain my excitement at the prospect of a first date in Barnet Cemetry looking for his cousin
If their not trying to show you one kind of stiff their trying to show you another !!
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:37:18 PM | My latest one boring, but very concise
"Hi"
Delete! | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:50:00 PM | I dont know what you ladies are moaning about, if you got a 'hi' or a 'nice hat' type of message from me then you should count yourselves very lucky indeed!!!! And then proceed to fall at my feet obviously  | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:56:43 PM | My messages, like my omelettes, are always plentiful, delicious, and full of surprises, positivity and mushrooms.
Now, at times, I'm sure some lovely people have had help with (or simply pinched) their profiles, as they are definitely NOT the witty, erudite, carefree liar they advertise themselves as.
Also, as a previous incumbent commented, I have realised that many times, my skilfully crafted, considerate and completely personable mini-novellas are all but wasted on some squirt who is, in truth, more a 'chillin wid me matez' type than the feminine goddess/golden chalice once proffered.
So, to brevify or not to brevify, that is the question.
Is brevify a word? Of that, there is no question.
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 5:13:28 PM |
'Hi, I liked your profile'
Love those ones - 99.9% messages with this title show that they did not even read my profile at all as they clearly do nto match even 1 of my hmmm "criteria".
Olso love those ones from 20 yo with "I like older women".
Excuse me if I do not feel like an "older woman" and fail to be impressed/grateful/flattered by some kiddy trying to get laid.
"You want to know about me - call me on 98469858" - yeah, rite.
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 5:23:36 PM |
A female fellow poffer I know recently recieved a message from a bloke simply saying " Hi, nice hair, have a great evening " !!
WTF Is that all about ? Is that a chat up line? A compliment ? What ????
just take it as a compliment and open the next one! | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/29/2008 5:34:14 PM |
IF U HAD ME ALONE... L0CKED UP
IN Y0UR R00M F0R TWENTY-F0UR H0URS
& WE COULD DO WHATEVER YOU WANTED
WHAT W0ULD Y0U D0 WITH ME? TELL ME IN
A MESSAGE... CUZ ITS A SECRET... THEN
REPOST THIS IN YOUR PROFILE... YOU MIGHT
BE SUPRISED WITH THE RESPONSES YOU GET
In an email or in a profile - always makes me want to reply :
"I would leave you paint, some brushes, hammers, shelves, window cleaner etc and letting you out in the morning I would make sure all decorating/cleaning has been done in those 24 hours."
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/30/2008 1:22:51 AM | | I recently had by way of 1st contact...."You look prim and proper lets put the cams on and have some fun" | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/30/2008 1:26:05 AM | | So far I'm with you every step of the way G.O.W. , especially the kiddies. | |
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| Lame Messages !!
Posted: 6/30/2008 1:50:51 AM |
IF U HAD ME ALONE... L0CKED UP
IN Y0UR R00M F0R TWENTY-F0UR H0URS
& WE COULD DO WHATEVER YOU WANTED
WHAT W0ULD Y0U D0 WITH ME? TELL ME IN
A MESSAGE... CUZ ITS A SECRET... THEN
REPOST THIS IN YOUR PROFILE... YOU MIGHT
BE SUPRISED WITH THE RESPONSES YOU GET
ive had this as a message a few times....
i always reply..
id start off by leading you to my dimly lit bedroom..slowly and sensually stripping you naked.. then take my nice furry handcuffs and gently tie you to the bed... wen your nice and comfy then the fun can begin....
i can rifle through your pockets, take your car keys, credit card and wallet and go off shoppping...... THANKS... | |
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