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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/3/2008 1:17:40 PM | | You're getting bad vibes about him because he's not a particularly good person. I wouldn't over analyse it. Some people just aren't capable of thinking about anyone but themselves, just be thankful you've spotted he's one of them sooner rather than later. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/3/2008 2:38:00 PM |
No of course id wanna sit around and listen to YOU all fukin day! omg im just remembering while im single! and u know what?
I had to check for a minute to make sure I was looking at my computer screen and not my cell phone. 
Anyway, I wouldn't want a second conversation with someone who only talks about themselves, let alone date them. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/3/2008 2:58:16 PM | | Actually I had the same situation. I went to the doctor, and told the guy and he said, aw thats nothin'... everyone this time of year gets that (cold, etc) I was floored. Once he talked about fishing to me on the phone for an hour, long distance (no point to the conversation) Now looking back, all of these posts are right, he's selfish, he is not good boyfriend material, he unfortunately doesn't get it that its a two way street. He also probably has some kind of insecurity. The best thing anyone could do is leave them to themselves, maybe they will get the hint they are selfish and draining, maybe then they will change. But don't bet on it. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/3/2008 3:27:11 PM | No. It's a one way communication in any type of conversations, and none of them is satisfying in the least to engage in. The best you can do is to walk away with a ton of information that may or may not be of use to you. The bad part? Lack of *mutual* sharing.
A relationship is a two way street. Let him know about it; give him a chance. Maybe he doesn't realize that he's being self absorbed. If all else fails...bail. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/3/2008 4:26:26 PM | No!!! I had a few dates last winter with a man who was witty, intelligent, charming, very attractive....all attributes that I usually find appealing. Truth is...most of each date was spent with me listening to him blow his horn, praise himself to the skies, while I simply nodded my head or interjected the occasional "I see." When he did take the time to let me share, he was an attentive listener until something I said made him think of himself, lol!! We both love to sing, so I would sometimes break into song just to get him focussed on me!
I have had my fill of arrogant men after my experience with him. Arrogance is not an appealing attribute for this lady. Confidence is ok. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/3/2008 5:02:53 PM | | i think these guys praise the hell out of themselves because maybe they got low self esteem or need a pat on the back... quite frankly i dated a woman who always talked about herself and if i started talking when she was done she would cut me off and start talking again...so its not only men who do that.... my advice to you is ... buy him a mirror ..wrap it up and say its a present to remember me by.... give it him and say goodbye. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 1:56:25 PM | "Our IM conversation immediately steered itself to 'him'."
Well you can't accuse him of 'not opening up' to you.
I've heard many men complain about the same thing about women.
It reaffirms my belief that while there are some differences between men and women, men and women aren't *that* different when it comes down to it.
BTW: Have you tried saying to him "Hang on a second... there's something I really want to talk about..." and then go on about what you want to discuss?
I've seen many instances where one partner gets irritated with the other because their 'signals' didn't get picked up. With some people, you just need to be more direct. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 3:42:03 PM | To zeke. Re your "BTW" comment in your above reply.
I tried that tactic with the arrogant man I mention in my post^^^. Unfortunately, when I started sharing what I wanted to talk about, he said, "Oh, that reminds me.....," and began rambling on and on about a similar situation he had experienced. Boring!!!!!!! At that point I asked him to drop me off at home. | |
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her121
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Joined: 6/19/2008
Msg: 70 | |
| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 4:06:29 PM | | No - I've learned! I had a boyfriend who after constantly talking about himself, his life, his job, his friends, his family and numerous 'hints' from me about narcissim and self-centredness ... actually uttered the immortal lines .. "Oh listen, I'm sorry, babe, I've been going on and on... what about you .. {I inwardly smiled and thought 'hurrah, at last, the penny's dropped'!} ... what do you think of me?! (hopes ... dashed! :-( ) - they'll never change!! | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 5:10:29 PM | | You did the right thing. He will just find someone else and repeat his actions. That is why this dating service is so helpful, You get to know someone before getting all dolled up and going out with them. Just to learn you do not like them. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 6:06:59 PM | I was in a 2 year relationship with a guy just like that...STUPID of me, because it never got any better. I thought if I showed I was interested and that I cared it would be returned...my mistake. If I was upset about something he would say well that's not as bad as ...blah, blah, blah about him. I realized it was time to go when my eyes would glaze over whenever he opened his mouth. I would have told him I was leaving but it wouldn't have heard it anyway...... Never again. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 6:08:56 PM | | Oh boy can I relate to this topic. Don't know how some people become so flawed in their personalities these days, but there are so many that are. I would also suggest that when you do break it off be sure and point this behavior out to him. Maybe it will do him some good and he can make a point to work on this flaw. If he realizes that this behavior cost him dating someone then he would want to change otherwise he will be stuck finding someone that can deal with this egotiscal way he is.... | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 7:48:55 PM | OP,
Have you tried the direct approach, told him your observations and see what he has to say? I had a similar situation with a platonic male friend and I pointed it out. He told me that if I had something to say, I should just say it. He also said, if he turned the conversation to him, I should turn it back to me. I also mentioned he didn't ask questions and he said that he felt asking questions was too probing and nosy. After this honest discussion, he has modified his behavior a bit. He's been like this for 30+ years and he's not going to change overnight.
I don't think this type of behavior is solely a male problem, because I can think of at least a few females in my life who do the same thing, but it does seem to be more prevalent among men I've known. Good conversations requires a dialog, not serial monologs.
If a person is truly narcissistic, I wouldn't want that person in my life, male or female, if I had a choice. With family, we may not have a choice. | |
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| Would you continue dating a man who always talks about himself?
Posted: 7/4/2008 8:24:51 PM | Lololol.
I dated a guy for 1 1/2 years, granted, half of that was a long distance relationship.
BUT, he never asked (or knew) my last name (!), asked where I worked, or even my kids names.
Over time I learned he was a NPD. Not all are of course, but be careful. | |
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