shimbo
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Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 26 | |
| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/2/2008 5:19:03 PM |
I just have a better perspective...
Maybe what I have more of now is balance
So are you balanced enough for casual sex now?
I.
don't.
think.
so. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/2/2008 5:46:36 PM | So are you balanced enough for casual sex now?
I.
don't.
think.
so.
define "casual" sex?
for some, if you don't have a ring & picked out the china pattern, any sex with another is considered "casual" and NOT in their vocabulary.
no harm, no foul
for some, it's usually the end result of an evening out with a really good friend (fwb, f0k-buddy, call it what you want).
no harm, no foul.
so, if one is to be considered 'balanced' they automatically need to be open for "casual" sex?
just asking............ | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/2/2008 6:09:36 PM | | The only thing that's hardened is my arteries. My heart still breaks at times. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/2/2008 6:56:58 PM | At my age nothing hardens....
especially that sponge like tissue...
my I can't wait 'til I get old.
...errrr... 'got a sponge' ~ Sienfield | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/2/2008 10:10:39 PM | | I can say at one time my heart was so hard that nothing would or could break it. I was bound and determined that noone would ever have the opportunity to do this again. I lived in a world of despair and sadness. The key word here is "I". When the time came that I finally saw that "I" made the choice to harden my heart. I saw that I was very unhappy this way too. But when in love....sure it hurt at times and it did die in the end. But I am still alive!! I have way to much passion and way to much desire to stay in a world full of despair and sadness. When I found out that I was in love I found that I was happier. The person I fell in love with was beautiful and fun to be around. They laugh at me and with me. They had the desire to explore the world like it was their last day on earth, they appreciated the small things just as much as the bigger things. This person had the desire to be happy and they made it happen for me. This person is ME. Now I know that I can and do love as much today as I did way back when. When I am in a relationship I don't hold back. I give every bit of my passion and love to it. I don't know if it will be my soulmate, I don't care really. Each relationship gives to me what I want and desire and I like to thing that I give it right back. Should it end....ok, but I can take with me some beatuiful and exciting memories and grow just alittle bit more. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/2/2008 10:59:15 PM | | No, mine hasn't. It is still soft. The only thing that is different is I have a wall around it now. hopefully someone will knock that wall down and get into my heart without hurting me | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 2:25:51 AM | Young love is easily confused with infatuation & lust.
Ive loved before & hopefully will again, but I've also come to realise that love isnt enough & to have longevity in a loving relationship, in my opinion, we must also have friendship, compatibility on most levels, respect & to be a soulmate, a hard ask, but I for one am comfortable enough in my own skin to be selfish enough to want the complete package & until that comes along I'll just carry on with life & enjoy the great friendships I have now & hopefully make some new ones along the way.
If it doesnt, then its just not meant to be
Hardened with age. Never, & rest assured if it comes along I'll jump in boots & all | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 5:31:58 AM | Love After Love
The time will come
when, with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror,
and each will smile at the other's welcome,
And say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you
all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.
Derek Walcott | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:13:58 AM | | I think its just becoming jaded due to all the losers running around in this world. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:14:56 AM | I tend to agree with "TroubleAhoy"... While I wouldn't think that "mistakes" is the term for it, I would think that we make our attempts and enter into relationships with our eyes wide open.
Perhaps we are all scarred a bit from having our hearts broken, but at this stage, that isn't going to stop me from putting it out there again,....
After all - it's my heart... and besides me, I know that at some point, someone out there is going to care for it as much as I do. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:42:09 AM | well ms wildflower on average you are right. the older we get the more we tend to become cynical. we get hurt more often and tend to expect the worse. its amazing most folks will believe in huhappily ever after a lot easier than happily, but for most of us thats been our experience. now does one have to become cynical? no. its a choice. people have been falling in love and living happily since the dawn of creation (at least i dont recall adam and eve going to marriage counseling  ) there is no reason to believe that any one of us is so "special" that the rules of love dont apply to us. it is easier to keep up a cynical front and keep people at arms length. it is easier to keep things on a safe level, but its also easier to fall into a pit than get out of it, which does not make falling in a pit better for you. guess what the old parrothead is trying to say, for me, i still believe in the happily ever after leading to a long and happy relationship. do you have to kiss a lot of toads first, most likely. hey there are more gars in the plenty of fish fishing hole than one can shake a fishing pole at. but kissing a toad never killed me (or anyone that i know of) yet. you just gotta have some faith in the positive and look for positive in people. be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves, jesus said, and you just might find your silver lining on the dark cloud of your romantic life. in fact that person may be just a key click away. the optomistic old parrothead | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:44:14 AM | | engel mutter, ever hear the old steppinwolf song "your walls to high"? might want to check it out. good philosophy in classic rock. the fruedian parrothead | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:48:18 AM | | well lookinatit i have to agree with you on the fact there are more losers in the world. however there are also more winners, happens with population getting out of control. however one thing the old dead greek dudes hit on a long time ago, the foundation for our literature from comic books to soap operas, is that people enjoy watching others fail. we prefer to read about losers and broken stuff and nasty stuff for whatever reason. or as tolkien said in the hobbit: "days that are good to spend dont make much of a story".. the whole iconoclast thing comes into play. most folks want to believe the bad and not the good in most folks. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 10:25:31 AM | | Blind squirrels starve and die if they don't get eaten first. Animal Kingdom knowledge: Use it for dating. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 1:13:37 PM | Nope...I just think we become better at handling the pain of a broken heart.
At my age nothing hardens....
Now that was funny! | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/3/2008 5:06:06 PM | actually, I thought mine hadn't but it has -
didn't want it to, but I think it's protection | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:07:25 AM | "Even a blind squirrel gets lucky once in awhile"!!!!!!!!LOVED it...sooo there is hope
for me!
I feel my heart has hardened a little but it has the capacity to love again,when the right lucky guy comes along!!God makes our hearts flexible and open for LOVE.. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/5/2008 9:43:41 AM | After a break up, as a kid, we thought it was the 'end of the world'...we now know that no one DIES of a broken heart, and we've learned ways to deal with it better. We learn from experience.
I'm not saying that it doesn't still HURT...only that we know that this, too, will pass.....in time.
~DC~ | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/5/2008 9:56:36 AM | | my heart is so hard, you'd need a jack hammer to get through to it! If ya can find it first!! | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/5/2008 10:24:09 AM | I'm not so sure that hearts harden with age - only if we allow them too. Anyone that tells us to "suck it up" at any age, can take that advice and put it where the sun doesn't shine. If one does not feel sadness, joy, despair, heartbreak, love, that in itself is the worst. Human beings were given the ability to have emotions of all types, that's what makes us human.
I think older people at times, let life's experience beat them down, but that in itself doesn't cause a heart to harden. | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/5/2008 12:16:43 PM | | well put sue cat. us folks over the (hill) of 45 really do need to watch our self pity. yeah we got our hearts broke and we can choose to build a moat and wall and traps around our hearts so it wont happen again. but like the quote in home alone two says about the old piegon lady (cant remember exactly) but kevin told her if she hides herself away what difference does it make if your heart is borken or not? yeah you hide away for a while after getting hurt, kind of like keeping your foot elevated if you sprain an ankle, but living in a shell? come on now, thats not living. or like rush said" is it living or just existence? yeah you it takes a little more persistence to get up and go the distance" (the enemy within) the old parrothead | |
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| Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 7/5/2008 3:48:49 PM | No, I don't think our hearts harden with age.
The young ones are just now learning how to cope with all of it and some get so confused and it takes time for them to understand that this is life and there's no guarantees. But they don't understand this at first really. You remember how you were in your teen's and 20's.........bullet-proof, never gonna die, indestructible, devil may care attitude. And then, the first serious thing hits them and some aren't prepared for how they feel.
As we age we have a better understanding of this process and most of us deal with it better. And we know, that somehow we will make it through because of life experience not only in dealing with broken hearts but all aspects of life.
When we get to our 40's+ we've lived a lot of life and the young ones in their 20's posting on the other forums have only just begun. | |
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