| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 8:48:57 PM | I hate being alone......
that statement would cause me to not engage friendship...let alone a relationship..
that statement from experience of people who hate being alone ... tells me... clingy/needy.... replaceable... anyone will do... etc.... demanding.....
once you enjoy your own company..
have likes/dislikes.... you would be more independant....
i hope that helps.....
when your header says... i like alone time and my own company..... and would love to share times with others..... = not clingy... not needy etc..
for eg i know a guy i used to see years ago.... he hated being alone..... any woman that came along he would keep .. until she dumped him.......
smiles/peace | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 8:53:14 PM | "Do you have a pic for your profile?"
She says they run after they meet. Posting a picture has nothing to do with that. I hardly think she needs to do any soul searching, she's just having a run of bad luck, she's meeting loosers. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:03:47 PM | I am not sure many people like being alone for a very, very long time. Maybe, there are some folks like that. I don't know. We are just human. Some people are afraid of commitment, and then some guys when they actually find you are interested get scared, because they are afraid of losing their freedom. Some women are like that. I've dealt with that. Hey, things can be brighter, and I hope they will be for you just like the fireworks of the 4th of July.
Peace... | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:04:16 PM | Be patient, sometimes ya gotta kiss lots of frogs before ya meet your handsome prince....or princess,lol | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:10:10 PM | "men are such strange creatures. if they meet a woman that shows 'she wants them' they suddenly think, well who else might want me? so they hightail it and run in the hope that the next 'chick' would want them too. mature??? not even close....
but that's how they are. then they get mad when a woman plays hard to get! if only they'd stop playing 'the game' first...."
sorry, but that is rubbish!  | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:37:23 PM | eastendwoman
[men are such strange creatures. if they meet a woman that shows 'she wants them' they suddenly think, well who else might want me? so they hightail it and run in the hope that the next 'chick' would want them too. mature??? not even close....
but that's how they are. then they get mad when a woman plays hard to get! if only they'd stop playing 'the game' first.... ]/quote
plz don't make this a gender thing...women have done the same to me.And don't generalize.Not all men turn and run or think as you suggest. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:49:53 PM | "men are such strange creatures" God I am sick of this garbage. You write a woman, age appropriate, similar interests, on her profile "I'm more interested in what's inside than what he looks like". Then 25 read/deletes, and the three that answer say "I don't think we're a good match". Who pays for dinner, who doesn't pay for dinner, who wants to split the check, who doesn't show up, who shows up but hides in a corner then leaves when you walk in. What do you think, I'm blind and didn't see you? "The person who asks should pay", but if you never ask your never going to pay! But after all this and the fifty more things I'm just too damn tired to type on here, what do we get to go with "strange creatures", oh yes "If only they'd stop playing the game first"
I'm a man, I want to date a intelligent woman. I'm willing to buy dinner, in fact I insist that I buy dinner. I want to hold the door open, I want to hold your chair. I don't want sex on a first date, frankly I don't want sex till I know you well enough to entertain that thought. I want to meet a woman open enough to tell me what she thinks and feels. As a man, when I have been single, I ask the women out. All of the above I learned from early on in my life, I don't stray from my core beliefs. If you are not getting straight answers from men, THEN YOUR DATING THE WRONG MEN!! This is supposed to be fun, it is supposed to add something positive in your life. I'm sorry ladies, this really is not fun, God I'm ready to buy a dog and have done with this sh*t. Bob
PS No one who is here on POF wants to be alone. We all came here to meet someone. It isn't rocket science and no one can read minds. Just remember we are ALL just as confused by what happens. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 10:05:11 PM | ^^^^ buy the dog bob..... ive had my dog 18 years.. they are higher evolved than humans on levels equalling..... loyalty..faithfulness..trust/forgiveness.
companionship.... if humans who also are capable of such traits... and desire it in others... were half as forthcoming in those traits as dogs... the world would be majestic...
my dog is deaf/blind... and 18... he knew moses...lol. in dog years.. but i will be his seeing eye person.. i will tend to him.. and be loyal/faithful etc .. b/c thats friendship.....i dont abandon b/c it gets too hard... or costs me.. other things i could be doing.. if i met a person... with the characteristics of my dog... he would be treated the same..
get the dog bob.. ....you wont be disapointed until the dog needs to pass .. then yep love/heart will hurt. but its worth it.....
smiles/peace | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/4/2008 11:32:21 PM |
men are such strange creatures. if they meet a woman that shows 'she wants them' they suddenly think, well who else might want me? so they hightail it and run in the hope that the next 'chick' would want them too. mature??? not even close....
but that's how they are. then they get mad when a woman plays hard to get! if only they'd stop playing 'the game' first....
I hope you were joking, if you seriously think that's how us men are that's a big laugh. I'm a dedicated, passionate, compassionate person. If I with a woman I don't think being with another woman. My problem is usually I usually end up the rebound guy. Not saying that for self pity but people just feel comfortable talking to me in real life.
I don't care if a woman plays hard to get. Plenty of women out there that won't so why bother.
I don't get why people always have to be so negative. Learn from your greatest pains. When you find the true one you will cherish it! | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 7:46:07 AM | | maybe you should stop going after guys that are losers and you might have a relationship that lasts a while | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 7:59:24 AM | i dont mind being alone. but, i hate never finding anyone i like. as if the world is full of people who would rather mess around instead of be kool.
if i like a girl she thinks im psycho and says i need to chill and bla bla. and they take off before i even get to know them.. so really, i never meet any girls here i like because they run before i even get to know them at all.
then, i get other girls who want to sleep with me the seccond them meet me and tell me i am psycho for not wanting to sleep with them.
so wtf.. im only wasting time here today cos i hated being in bed tired but awake and hungry but no apetite.. not wanting to come online knowing theres no one who will write to me, but figured i couldnt get any more depressed than i already was so here i am...
ok i was wrogn i hate being alone too. anyways, at least u got to date a guy for 2 months.. i wish i could talk to a girl today for even 2 minutes. or this year even, but oh well. its not my loss. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:12:23 AM | There is a difference between being alone and feeling lonely.
If you're someone who does not have a sense of identity without a guy or feels bored,then you need to start enjoying your own company and finding out about "you".
You have no picture on your profile.You say little about yourself other than you have a large family.
I don't sense humor or wit,know little of your interests.
Is it possible you become clingy and needy?
You will no doubt receive lots of broad generalizations and male bashing,they are legion on this site.
Rather,I suggest you do some hard and heartfelt work on yourself.
BE the person you are looking for.
Get to know YOU.
Start enjoying your own company.
If you are putting out there that you "hate" being alone my guess is you're coming across a bit desperate or needy.
Also,polish up that profile.Ask for help.Post a nice pic.
Improve the writing,show some humor,interests,opinions.You're like cookie dough waiting for some guy to be the cookie cutter.
YOU define who you are,not anyone else.
Good luck to you! | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:20:54 AM | When I was your age and struggling to work a lot of long hours, raise my children and keep home and hearth together, I would have sold my soul for some "alone" time. I longed to have a scented bubblebath I could soak in for an hour... a few hours to just walk 'n appreciate the beauty around me... some time with a good book in my hand and no one hollering at me... A lot of people crave what you currently have... But I'll bet that's not gonna make you feel any better is it?
There is nothing you have to "do" to meet the right guy OP... It's about being who you are and getting into activities where you will find other people who share your interests in them. But they must be activities you are interested in for the activities sake alone or you will find that people know you have an alternate agenda.
I think if you can learn to love the good things about being alone, you will find people are drawn to you because you are happy and contented with your life. If, on the other hand, you are looking rather desperate, you will likely find that the people who are drawn to you will also have issues... | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:35:37 AM | Would be great if a woman showed me she is interested ! Guess it's my little shyness & a little insecurity when it comes to that.
Hoping to meet a companion soon. So tired of being alone. Want to travel more, do things. Maybe be a snowbird, get away from Pa. winters.
Char | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:42:32 AM | Hi,
I'm new on POF, and I already like what a lot of people are saying. Silken Fire makes some excellent points here. I had a dear friend who was so hungry for companionship that she ended up dating and eventually marrying someone who I figured was brilliant but completely off the 'strange meter' and (as we all later found out) a raging alcoholic. In her desperation, she made some terrible decisions and wound up with a broken heart.
In my single life when I was in my 20's and probably was giving out desperate vibes, women wouldn't come within miles of me. When I got out more, did things for others and thought less of my own problems and relaxed, someone always came into my life. One of my favourite quotes is by the philsopher/ theologian Paul Tillich: "Language has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone, and the word solitude to express the glory of being alone." All we have to do is figure out the difference. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:43:33 AM | Let me tell you , you are not alone , I am older but find the same problem .Times have changed a lot .Good luck in finding the right person.
Rich  | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 9:56:29 AM | | having been single most of my life with a few relationships thrown in here and there let me tell you i have appreciated being alone. not lonely though. i can always find something to do and i learned to love the most important person of all-me. there are times i get lonely hence my name but for the most part i am a happy person. i would like to meet someone to round out my life but if that does not happen i still have my best freind and confidante around-me. learn to love yourself first and the rest will happen. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 10:10:35 AM | I hate being alone
It will pass slowly. You will feel something dieing inside of you and you will be just like the majority of the professional dating website junkies who are happy being alone and incapable of EVER loving anybody but themselves. BUT on the upside (if there is one) you wont hate being alone anymore, you will just feel numb, like you lost something you will never ever get back, the ability to feel love for somebody. The being alone will be just another inconvenience in your day and a potential relationship will be like buying a new piece of furniture. You will make your decision based on LOGIC and who will be a better partner in your day to day life, NOT based on emotion which is what love is, an EMOTION that defies rhyme or reason or logic. We dont choose who we love (why do we love one car and hate another) but we can choose a partner for a relationship or marrige, based entirely on a lack of love. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 1:05:26 PM |
"Language has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone, and the word solitude to express the glory of being alone."
I suspect the difference is the lonely person is longing to be with the love that they have lost or are away from wether real or an ideal person who they have never actually met yet. But who is to say there isnt a degree of loneliness in solitude, it is generally outweighed by the desire to be alone. The lonely person has NO DESIRE to be alone so maybe the difference is the the term desire. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 1:21:12 PM | | Enjoy being alone; if someone runs, don't chase after them - takes too much work. When someone runs TO you, that is worth being alone until that happens. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 1:32:35 PM | | you are perfecto to my i like your smile way not send my do you like | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 1:46:29 PM |
that statement would cause me to not engage friendship...let alone a relationship..
that statement from experience of people who hate being alone ... tells me... clingy/needy.... replaceable... anyone will do... etc.... demanding.....
I don’t think that hott_stuff34 really meant to go that extreme.
Being alone sucks, and trust me, I am about as alone as one can get without actually becoming a backwoods hermit. I am fine with my aloneness. I find most people to be too much, chaotic, are very presumptuous, and over insinuate too much.
Being alone sucks in the fact that people have an ingrained need to connect with others. I don’t think that clingy is a bad thing if it is between the proper two people and accepted on both sides. I wouldn’t mind finding a woman to intercling with, but that is me, and I don’t think that I am like most, but I don’t know that for sure. | |
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| i hate being alone
Posted: 7/5/2008 2:08:24 PM |
I hate being alone...... why is it that when 2 people meet and they like each other....the other one runs? Do guys really get scared? I'm attractive and funny, but just can't seem to meet the right guy....what do i have to do to meet him
Sometimes it seems that winning a girl over is a battle, regardless if I truly want to be with her permanently. Maybe it is some selfish need to feel validated or maybe women should not play so hard to get in the first place and make me prove myself.
Also sometimes, I just want to be held by someone who really wants to hold me. | |
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