| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 2:09:30 PM | | Sounds like you're sensitive that the 'teacher' commented on your lack of readability. You're using the written word to appeal to many people out there and it doesn't hurt to hit the enter button on occasion. Some people consider intellect and the ability to hold a conversation, written or otherwise, far above what size a person is. But there's hope for you yet, maybe one day you'll find someone who's willing to overlook that, but probably not, oh the irony! | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 2:35:28 PM | | OP-How are you defining morbidly obese? It usually means at least 2x the desired weight.I doubt that someone in this category would be training for a marathon! | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 2:56:55 PM | ^^ I think he is saying that she lied about the activities she said she was involved in.
I think it's safe to say that a profile is just that... a profile... No amount of words can describe a person fully, but only to gain a perspective of who that person is.
If you meet them, and discover they have lied on their profile, then you can pretty much chalk that meet up as a write off, and pretty much leave it at that.
NEEEEEEXT!!
lol
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 3:10:31 PM | Right on -BraZen-
OP~
I thought as a forty-one year old "business owner", you would appreciate a bit of honest feedback with regards to the way your profile may be viewed by other adults who are not necessarily teachers. In this day and age, we have everything at our fingertips; therefore many adults view improper capitalization, improper punctuation and blatant disregard of spell check - just plain lazy. First impressions make lasting impressions.
bE.st! wISheS"? | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 3:10:45 PM | | I know plenty of men AND women who are hugely active, and yes, they're still overweight. Some people have medical issues, and to call them unhealthy and morbidly obese is not only false, it's cruel and certainly speaks volumes about the OP's character. He's out of touch with reality if he thinks just because a person is overweight, they're lazy and inactive. Hell, I know women who are bigger that are more active than most of the people posting in this thread. I, however couldn't get to the gym to save my life and really don't care, I found someone that loves me for who I am. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 3:45:08 PM | I agree that many women AND men lie about either their height, their weight or both. As far as I am concerned there is no point in lying about something like that as it will become evident if the 2 should ever meet.
I agree that I have seen some female profiles where the gal states she is a few extra pounds. Being a BBW I can honestly tell you that if they are a few extra pounds I am a Barbie doll.  So in that aspect I can see the frustration.
However the point I do NOT agree with is
I feel I deserve to be with someone who takes pride in their appereance. .
So although you may be frustrated with how people present themselves, do NOT assume that because they are big they don't take pride in their appearance. That is a very narrow minded remark and as far as I am concerned definitely uncalled for. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 5:10:21 PM | I don’t see anywhere in the OP, or in the OP’s succeeding posts, that he is looking for a “barbie”. He states in the OP that he is looking for a woman who “keeps herself in shape” So why IS it, that women who do keep themselves in shape, are repeatedly referred to using this derogatory term? Is this somehow less offensive than referring to someone who does not keep themselves in shape, as a “cow”? I think not, yet it’s been my observation that this double standard thrives whenever a discussion arises about body types.
OT: Why do people lie on their profiles?
People have been exaggerating, embellishing and outright lying about their attributes to impress other people since the dawn of mankind. This is not a new concept, and writing these down in black and white on a profile just makes it much more obvious. It’s human nature to downplay those less than stellar qualities so if you keep that in mind, you’ll have a far more realistic view of potential partners.
As far as “deserving” anything, how dare you??? That “entitlement attitude” is reserved for women only! At least that’s what I’ve read over and over again in the forums! 
LH | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 5:18:30 PM |
I don’t see anywhere in the OP, or in the OP’s succeeding posts, that he is looking for a “barbie”. He states in the OP that he is looking for a woman who “keeps herself in shape” So why IS it, that women who do keep themselves in shape, are repeatedly referred to using this derogatory term? Is this somehow less offensive than referring to someone who does not keep themselves in shape, as a “cow”? I think not, yet it’s been my observation that this double standard thrives whenever a discussion arises about body types.
Exactly! It's soooo terrible for the OP to say that he doesn't want to meet overweight women who lie on their profiles, but it's A-OK for everyone else to call any woman who ISN'T overweight, a "barbie". Complete bullshi*t. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:41:44 PM | like i can honestly say im a bbw and im not afraid of it, sometimes being on the POF site i get guys who dont look like the type that arent in BBW's lol and maybe in regards to the girls on the POF site some women do consider themselves average or a few extra pounds.. nd maybe specify what you are looking for in particular in ur profile, like weight wise, looks etc.. then you would be getting replies in regard to what your looking for !!  | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 10:33:27 PM | I have one small point, which I think most resonable adults will agree with.
It sounds like you did not try and get to know these women before you "picked them up". Did you get involved in IM chat or telephone and point out your paramiters? I would say no..because if you said to any lady "you better be skinny" you would not have had very many pick-ups
I would like to add...I read your profile and it stinks of >>>>>Sugar Daddy<<<<< combined with the gramatical mistakes..dude you have to be more clear and honest if you want that back:) | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 10:47:28 PM | Like other people have said.. men, and women.. lie on their profiles. Men and women, put up fake pics.
I've met guys who on their profile said they were 5'9 and when we meet, they are shorter than me. I see guys who have athletic on their profile and wouldnt even be average on a good day. Such is life.
I would agree with others on here, and put something more specific in your profile. I've seen a few guys have something along the lines of .. I consider myself athletic and am looking for a partner who is also in good physical shape or of a smaller size.
I'm not offended by that and I dont think most would be. Also the type of physical activies one does doesnt really help determine their size. I go to the gym about 3-4 times a week for an hour and a half each time. Still aint getting no smaller in my mind, but the heart rate and breathing gets easier every day 
And girls... dont be offended by the barbie doll comment. The 'barbie' shape has been refered to as 'the ideal size' by men/women/doctors since the barbie doll came out. Plus what each considers average, is also different. Saying barbie just gives a more specific mental picture as to 'shape'. In my mind Barbie means a girl whos slim/ atheltic but still has curves in the right places (Maria Carey/ J Lo) ... as opposed to a toothpick/ twig lets say like Gwen Paltrow or Alley McBeal :)
Hope that helps calm some people down.. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 10:58:08 PM | It sounds like you did not try and get to know these women before you "picked them up".
Perhaps THEY picked HIM up.
Furthermore, he didn't say he wanted a "skinny" lady... his concern was about liars.
Lay off this guy, as this exact issue has come up many times since I've been on here and the thread is always deleted. I also have had emails from members with the same complaint, yet not so forthright in the forum.
In some other forum posts, many women make mention of a HEIGHT requirement. So my question is, what's the diff? Singling out men who are shorter than you is ok, yet picking a woman who is smaller than you is not?
It's online dating.... We get to choose who we meet, and choose whether or not we would like to meet with them again. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 11:12:47 PM | I think most of us would agree that when we meet someone for the first time and discover blatant lies, that's an immediate *full stop, run away, do not pass go, do not collect $200*. I, too, have found love with someone to whom I was not initially attracted. The 'not your type' person may be lovely and, given a chance, I generally would take the time to get to know them, however, being misled would be an indicator of personality that I could not let pass and I would take a big fat pass on that guy!
I am a little curious what the OP considers 'morbidly obese'. I don't see a lot of that when I'm out and about. Fat, yes. Obese, some. Morbidly obese? No. Not so much.
OP, I also have to agree that you should clean up your profile a little. It is really tough to read, although I give you credit for actually having something to say.  | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 11:14:43 PM |
Furthermore, he didn't say he wanted a "skinny" lady... his concern was about liars.
I still believe there are NO liars and NO one misrepresents themselves on the internet.
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 11:38:03 PM | I am a little curious what the OP considers 'morbidly obese'.
Why do you care so much?
As for Cndn Girl............. nice photo
(you liar you)...... but you are just as attractive (if not more) without the photo shop babe!!
SMOOCH! | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 11:39:11 PM | I think most of the hostility towards the OP is that his attitude was overly judgemental.
We all prefer honesty from our prospective dates, but if you get to know someone a little before you meet, they may be more inclined to be honest. We are all trying to sell ourselves and some of those sales pitches aren't always the most accurate. On the other hand, some of us are too honest in our profiles and chase away perspective dates.
As for people not liking "barbie doll" comments, well I feel like that refers to that unattainable ideal, usually "plastic" enhanced like Pamela Anderson not women who take care of themselves. I certainly never use it as a derisive comment towards women who take care of themselves.
Perhaps the OP should state his expectations more clearly on his profile rather than criticize those he has dated. Spell it out dude, say you are in great shape and take pride in being physically fit and that you look for the same in a partner. That may help weed out people without being rude about it. It is all in how you say it.
I tend to pass over profiles where the women are taller than I am. Not because I am bothered by it, but women tend to dislike a man who is shorter than them. We all discriminate in some way, it is how we choose to do it that defines whether or not what we say is offensive. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/4/2008 11:48:21 PM |
As for Cndn Girl............. nice photo
(you liar you).....
LMAO
Yeah... but I'm getting a WHOLE new type of guy looking at my profile!!!
Maybe I should go brunette? And curly???
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 12:12:32 AM | Maybe I should go brunette? And curly???
Yes, yes, YOU SHOULD 
OT:I can say, as can anyone who has met me, that I LOOK EXACTLY like my pictures.... but I'm not trying to be something I'm not either. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 12:31:50 AM | Answering the OP: Because big girls ARE now the average. Just like if were to put if I were thin. Or athletic. Come on... I'm over six feet and two hundred and fifty pounds. Am I big boned? Or a few extra pounds? Probably, but what are you comparing me to? Hey Sassy, what you you say? LOL
Humankind (or just North Americans) have gotten fat. And so has it's descrptions of "average."
Check out the phenomenon of "internet disease."
http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php/Internet_disease | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 12:37:46 AM | This thread is funny..... certainly provides proof that one doesn't need to attend pof events in order to play dodgeball with the other members
Definitely an entertaining read, and I personally give this thread 3 out of 5 giggles.
On a serious note, I think there is a lot of good advice in this thread. All be it, quite often riddled within a mess of blattent hypocrisies.
My advice to the OP. When your feeling "e" jaded, step back for a while and self reflect, then refresh your approach/attitude/etc. based upon what reflection reveals..... a wise man once said, "without a mirror, there is no reflection."
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 6:44:11 AM | [/I am getting very frustarted with POF simply because of the amount of dates I have set up and ended up picking up somebody who is morbidly obese.]
...ok so I have not looked into how to make quotes....sue me
Foxy...I dont think his real concern was liars...this was his opening staement. As a note I was only trying to help him place a better less hostile filtering in place..Cheers!
As a side note..I just read both foxy and Oilers profiles.....Dude you should..she's petite, active, intelligent and loves hockey, and sees things from your perspective....he shoots he scores..Love you all!!!
Be Open
Be Honest
Be Happy | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 7:01:22 AM | You could just state clearly if you dont have a six pack or flat abs please dont message me? Your looking for what you want.. put some effort into your profile and state exactly what you want in the looks department??
Just a thought. | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 8:44:43 AM | Totally OT here, but damn CNDN, that pic of you is just HOT!!! I love it!
Didn't even recognize you at first, had to go read your profile to make sure you weren't someone else! | |
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| why do big girls think they are average
Posted: 7/5/2008 9:08:13 AM | I feel I deserve to be with someone who takes pride in their appereance
This comment hit me a little. Just because someone is over wieght doesn't mean they don't take pride in their appearance. I'm what I consider average. Yes I am a bit over weight, but not obese. I'm almost 50, and well things just don't look the same anymore!!! I have a physical job, am strong, can ride my bike for hours....did over 40 k in less then two hours on Thurs. I am healthy. I've been told by some on here that I'm too big for them......well too bad for them!!! hahahaha
My pictures are always recent.
Myself I prefer tall men. If I am chatting to someone on here and they are not what I am attracted to, I'm just open and honest. Men too use outdated pictures on their profiles. I always ask how recent it is. I never meet someone without seeing a picture, and even better if you can see them on web cam....hard to hide on there !!
I know attraction is very physical, but sometimes great things come in packages that are not wrapped perfectly......you have to be open minded.....you miss a good thing by strictly looking at the package and not what it holds inside!!
Good luck......... | |
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