WWindy
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Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 76 | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/20/2008 7:58:45 PM | Speaking as someone who has zero dating experience, I have my more social-oriented friends try to give me all these tips on what to wear, how to act, what the signs are, and honestly, none of it makes a damn bit of sense.
My big worry is that I won't find anyone who clicks with me, and that I would have to become a pathetic slave to the rules of social interaction for guys and girls, because quite frankly, I haven't seen any true success around here with anyone being themselves or with anyone following the pattern.
The only thing that keeps me from falling into the pattern as it has more...apparent success, for lack of a better term, is that I would have to sacrifice almost all of my morals to fit. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/20/2008 11:13:25 PM | I've actually read the book, unlike most people that comment on it! It
reads very much like some men's relationship manuals, only with the
roles reversed! I found that most interesting actually! There IS a lot
of good advice and some not so good advice given! I think if a person
were to follow ALL the rules, I could imagine them sitting at home, with
only the sound of crickets in the background, and them checking the phone
periodically to make sure it is still working! lol
Love, and courtship IS a friendly GAME and anyone who thinks that they
can avoid this fact, is leaving themselves wide open for disappointment!
I believe MOST women know this, and know much better then MOST men
how to play this game, that they pretend doesn't exist! | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/21/2008 3:23:54 PM | | Ah yes, the rules, a book for women with no brains that cannot think for themselves. And for men who want those women, just read the book, and work around the rules. All folks that want to manipulate their mates. They deserve each other. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/22/2008 6:41:45 AM | I had recently purchased "The Rules" which is a book of dating advice. Basically the book is pretty much telling girls to be unavailable and make the guy chase you. Has anyone really followed the rules? Was it sucessful? Just curious if it really works.
These "dating rules" are questionable at best and flat out stupid at worst. What works for one person may not work for another person. There aren't many "rules" that generally apply to all people or dating situations. Maybe unless you are mentioning something that is blatantly obvious. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/25/2008 7:16:46 PM | Frankly, I move on if a woman doesn't respond to my emails or calls. I'll initiate 1-2 times, then it's over if she doesn't show much interest.
The Rules may work on some guys, but not on ones who are confident and want a lady who won't play games. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/26/2008 10:48:03 AM | | Playing the chase? What happens after the chase is won? I would think if someone likes a chase, then afterwards, there would be no more to go after. My guess would say that perhaps this book was another way to put into words of one not looking or being too easy. I don't know, just guessing here. I think the love guru's are able to make tons of money on what they put out there, because people will always search for answers or other ways. The problem is that one author can't have all the answers, for all individuals. I personally, “Keep It Real”, and don’t make time to figure out someone else’s mind of how to win them over. If it's meant to happen, it will be a mutual thing and we both will be ourselves in doing so. I think a lot of people are not themselves out there, but all in time, no one can hide who they really are or keep up the roles they are trying on, for that long. That is where the, “Game”, playing comes into the picture, which makes dating very hard to do for everyone out there. If one chooses to read the books or any other informational guide, there is nothing wrong with that, as long as they realize that it won’t have, All, the working ways to go about the dating world. Take what one likes out of it, try it on and if it feels natural, then keep it and if it is not a natural feeling, leave it where it lies, in the pages of the book. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/29/2008 1:12:41 PM | It's probably a good book for women who essentially hate and distrust all men and want to manipulate one..
simplistic "rules" to manipulate a man's emotions..
sure, sounds like a good way to find a 'loving' relationship..NOT.
from what I heard of it and saw interviews with the authors, it is for money-hungry gold-digging women - how to be 'successful' in snaring a rich man into marriage.. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/29/2008 4:34:15 PM | | I dunno, i haven't been on a date yet lol. Haven't dated in years and now that I'm ready i guess i thought there'd be some big newsflash "hey everyone, Jen is ready to date again" lol i thought the dating process to find the perfect match was the hard part, turns out for me just finding a date is the hard part lol. but i trust God's timeline!! | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/29/2008 8:44:58 PM | | It works for a little while, at least until the chase is over, why? because people want what they think they cant have. So, once they get it, they may no longer want it, it's human nature. This goes for men as well as women. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/29/2008 9:48:40 PM | The author of "The Rules" is a frustrated old spinster who wants all womankind to suffer as she is suffering.
Well, what's the most hilarious aspect of "The Rules" is that one of the authors, Ellen Fein, got a divorce not shorty after her book came out. DOH!
My point exactly.
HER: No, it is still expected for the guy to pursue the lady, it shows that he is interested
Pursuing is one thing; but not returning calls for days/weeks or playing the games as post10 said ...
Is the man going to pursue a woman who plays mind and cell hpones games hanguing up when he calls. Or is busy for weeks on end
... then the woman is not worth the effort.
ME: good luck however. it was nice knowing you
HER: Ok high and mighty, nice knowing you and good luck in the future
She has the audacity to call you "high and mighty" when she's the bitc.h sitting on her high-horse throne??  
HER: So I have been out with 4 other guys too, what is the big deal, this is all about meeting someone until you find that right person. But in finding that right person it is important for them to know and understand you, you apparently can't, and are to closed minded to understand how I date, there is nothing wrong with the way I date, all the ladies at work date the same way
Talk about closed-minded. If her mind were closed any tighter, her brain would implode.
Oh ... she dates that way because all the "ladies" (read: future spinsters following in the footsteps of "The Rules" author) at work does the same thing. Brilliant!! Shows how much thinking she does for herself.
ME: yep and most men hate to do all the work in a relationship. Thats fine for the first few meetings/calls, but after a bit there is nothing wrong with the lady making the occasional move
Exactly ... the guy doing the initial pursuing is OK, but if she's unresponsive, the guy may simply interpret that as not interested and moves on.
For the most part I think books like that are written for people with so little backbone they can't walk upright
That would be called an invertebrate ... otherwise known as a worm. Good description for women who read and apply "The Rules" like the Ten Commandments.
A female friend of mine lent me "The Rules" and I finished it in an hour or so - it's pretty light reading
Light reading because it's geared towards small minds.  | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/29/2008 10:43:33 PM | OP,
I hate "rules" in general. Break them every chance I get.
But with that said, for those guys who love to play games and love the "chase" and get bored once the challenge is gone...well, one manipulator deserves another.
Nuff said. | |
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| Did anyone have any success with following The Rules?
Posted: 10/30/2008 2:13:28 AM | Oh yes, follow that book, but peel back the cover to find labeled just underneath it "How to become the Prey". I like hunting virtual monsters, not women that I've shown an interest in enough for them to pick up on it. You run I'll just let you, there's to many laws about sexual harassment for me to risk chasing the wrong person.
It's all hippocratic to me: women want laws that protect them from guys that they don't want to chase after them; yet they want guys to chase after them. It reminds me of a serpent biting it's own tail. | |
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