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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > Why Must You talk about Sex.      Mod Threads Home login  
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 Author Thread: Why Must You talk about Sex.
 ULO

Joined: 6/24/2006
Msg: 26
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 6:32:07 PM
If you don't like the way men are behaving, change your definition of men. Wether it is body type, income, or something else, you might be limiting yourself to these types of men. Prince charming doesn't exsist, you can't have your cake and eat it too, everyone needs to reevaluate how much importance they place on various traits. I'm not saying go overboard and date people you are very unnatracted to, just try pushing the boundries on some of your current limitations.
 pokerjimmy

Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 27
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:02:28 PM
when they ask...say, "why do you want to know"?

It's very inappropriate to discuss with someone you hardly know. It's a red flag for sure if guys are doing that on a meet and greet.
 Phoenix1217

Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 28
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:27:03 PM
I think it's just because most guys don't understand women. They talk to women the same way they talk to other guys. And women do the same thing. They don't get why men don't undestand them the way other women do. Everyone should read the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus books , especially Mars and Venus on a Date, by John Gray (they also have a great website, marsvenus.com, with forums).
 abelian

Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 29
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 8:09:01 PM

I have a question why the hell do men think its attractive to talk about sex immediately ....Just cause I have a Vagina does not automatically make me a candidate for you sexual fantasy's.


I beg to differ. Not to put too fine a point on it, but if you aren't a candidate for a sexual fantasy, it wouldn't matter if you had a vagina. Have you ever considered the possibility that the only difference between any friend and a date is sex?
 _Red_

Joined: 12/14/2006
Msg: 30
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 8:45:13 PM
You're 18, I'm guessing most of it is coming from guys close to your own age?

Try some older ones out while you wait for these guys to grow up and realize they need to keep some thoughts to themselves until a girl gets comfortable with them.

Good luck...
 rivereye

Joined: 2/19/2008
Msg: 31
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 8:59:16 PM
We have to talk about sex because it's the topic of the month, silly. Next month we'll all be talking about used radial truck tires.
 ClassyfiedAlly

Joined: 4/3/2008
Msg: 32
Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 9:07:30 PM

Because.... we're guys?

>Ahem< Having a penis does not give you license to act like a pig. Only men with no class would speak to a lady this way. Next!!
 life_of_leisure

Joined: 1/4/2007
Msg: 33
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 9:16:20 PM
^^^^ Uhm... I thought it was a Man's World, and therefore we could do anything we wanted.

Are you sayin' that ain't so?
_____________________________________________________________________________________

There's a Dilbert cartoon where he's evidently on a date with some gal; they're sitting at a table together, both looking rather uncomfortable and at a loss for words...

Her: I like men who know how to communicate...

Her: ...But not a man who only talks about sports, or computers, or his job, or TV, or sex, or jokes, or his accomplishments...

Dilbert: That would leave... Greek mythology... and... you.

Her: No Greek stuff.
 ULO

Joined: 6/24/2006
Msg: 34
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 9:30:26 PM
Since it's a man's world, and I'm a man, I'm saying you can't do anythign you want.
 ice_cream_dream2

Joined: 6/17/2008
Msg: 35
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 10:23:00 PM
Because.... we're guys?


>Ahem< Having a penis does not give you license to act like a pig. Only men with no class would speak to a lady this way. Next!!


anit that the truth..

s hit i got 3 penises 1 small 1 medium 1 large..

an i still would never address a woman like that..
 UniqueManinSoCal

Joined: 8/26/2007
Msg: 36
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/7/2008 10:30:23 PM


There's a simple solution.

Don't date morons.

You're welcome.

Probably the most to the point useful information on this thread.
 Montreal_Guy

Joined: 3/8/2004
Msg: 37
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:01:04 AM

Where I live, Quebec, it's simply another topic of discussion. By that I don't mean the type of conversations that are raunchy, but mean one can talk about sex as a subject far more easily than you can probably in Texas - without crossing any lines.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The hypocrisy in this statement never ceases to amaze me as I hear this same garbage all the time.

You don't have one clue as to what you are talking about here. You're just making some blanket statement based on some stereotype, yet you probably think you are an open minded person.

Simply amazing.


You are right, it IS amazing.

Time to illustrate what I mean, because you obviously haven't visited Quebec. I can show you exactly what the differences are between the two places quite easily. Let's take Texas vs Quebec - as I stated. It could apply to many other places in the USA as well.

First, remember that Janet Jackson nipple slip ? The one that caused so much fury and outrage there ? In English Canada, like America, that clip was shown censored.

HERE ?

It was shown uncensored , even on early morning talk shows on French channels, as the hosts laughed about how silly it all was. It was a female breast, something quite natural and normal - but somehow so shocking there.

On Saturday nights, at 11:30 PM, we used to have (not sure if we still do though) a main French network show a porn movie each week, called "Blue Nuit". That showed a lot of nudity and sexual acts, partially cut for the most graphic content. There were a few shows like that, and movies here are typically not censored for nudity anyway. These are mainstream network shows, not cable, and such movies appear in the early evening.

Now show me one place in the US that can say they can equal either of those things.

When I was an young teen, in Quebec City, the local small network used to feature rotating cast of live strippers from a local club, doing a half hour show - at 11:30 PM on Saturdays. They'd end that show totally nude.

Again, not cable.

Not directly related to sex, but indirectly, is the issue of common law marriage.


Average age for first marriage:

The average age for first marriages is rising steadily for both brides and grooms. In 2000, first-time brides were 31.7 years old, while grooms proclaimed their first marriage vows at an average age of 34.3.

Only two decades earlier, women and men were 25.9 and 28.5 years old, respectively, when they got married. Statistics Canada attributes the change to greater economic opportunities for women and the growing popularity of common-law unions.

Common-law relationships:

The number of couples forgoing marriage has more than doubled since 1981, the first time the statistic was tallied. At the time, there were 357,000 common-law relationships – about six per cent of all couples. By the 2001 Census, roughly 14 per cent of all couples were common law. Common-law unions are most prevalent among young people and couples living in Quebec, where more than 30 per cent of all families are common law.

Common-law unions tend to be temporary and transitory, though they often transform into marriage. However, those marriages break up far more frequently than marriages not born out of common-law relationships.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/marriage/


Roughly one third of Quebecer's (like myself) have been in this type of a marriage.


Private swingers clubs ? Totally legal here now, with freedom from prosecution.


Sexy 'swingers clubs' okay, Supreme Court rules

Updated Wed. Dec. 21 2005 11:32 PM ET

CTV.ca News Staff

Canada's top court says clubs that feature group sex and partner-swapping are perfectly legal.

In its 7-2 decision released Wednesday, the Supreme Court of Canada said, because consensual sexual activity in a private club poses no threat to society, it shouldn't be considered criminal.

The ruling sets a single standard, after lower courts went in opposite directions on two similar cases involving a pair of so-called 'swinger clubs' in Montreal.

In one case, the owner of a singles club was convicted on two counts of keeping a common bawdy house and fined a total of $7,500.

James Kouri's "Coeur a Corps" featured a dance floor around which a black curtain would swing every half hour. People hidden behind the drapery could then take part in or watch sex acts.

In the other case, Jean-Paul Labaye, the owner of the members-only "liberated couples" club L'Orage was also convicted of keeping a bawdy house and fined $2,500.

Members of Labaye's club could enter a locked room where they could participate in or watch any kind of sex act.

"It's a commercial establishment where people reconvene and practice swapping or swinging, even orgy gang-bangs," said Labaye's lawyer, Robert La Haye.

"It does not contaminate society. It does not hurt, it does not do any harm to society and to the public in general."

While Kouri's conviction was overturned by the Quebec court of appeal, Labaye's was upheld. Because a judge dissented in each of those decisions, they both wound up in front of the Supreme Court.

Under the Criminal Code, a "bawdy house" is defined as a place used or frequented for prostitution or "for the purpose of acts of indecency."

Because there was no money paid for the sex acts at the heart of the two cases, the prostitution issue was moot -- leaving the case to be decided in terms of indecency.

The definition of indecency is typically measured against what ordinary Canadians will tolerate.

But in their ruling Wednesday, the Supreme Court judges said the test for indecency should not simply be whether an activity violates a "social consensus" of community standards, but the actual harm it causes.

"Consensual conduct behind code-locked doors can hardly be supposed to jeopardize a society as vigorous and tolerant as Canadian society," Chief Justice Beverley McLachlin wrote in the majority decision.

http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/
20051221/SCC_swingersruling_20051221/20051221/


In Texas, until recently, sex shops could be prosecuted for doing business.


Feeling lonely in the Lone Star State this Valentine's Day? You'll be glad to know that the 5th Circuit Court of Appeals has just overturned a statute outlawing sex toy sales in Texas.

According to a law on the books since the 1970s, the sale, promotion, donation or lending of "obscene devices" was punishable by up to two years in jail.

http://blog.washingtonpost.com/offbeat/2008/02/
selling_sex_toys_now_legal_in.html


In Montreal, there's quite a few of them, and they've been around a long time.



Montreal has a nude beach, at Oka. There are also several other places around where sunbathers can go au natural, or topless, without problems. This isn't considered some "sexual" thing - it's a very European model of conduct. It's the human body, and nothing to be ashamed about.


Our federal government decided in the Sixties not to get involved in the bedrooms of the nation, and started us on a path where sexuality was no longer repressed by archaic laws.

Montreal's quite legendary for it's strip clubs and massage parlors. The former are , in many cases , quite classy places to go to, and one can often see couples there. There are others which feature "contact" dancing , in private booths, where one can touch the women (except for their genitals) quite legally.

Sex education is quite open and available, and so are things like contraceptives. There's almost no "religious" interference in any of these things I've mentioned, believe it or not.

All these things are are openly advertised, and free from police activity.

I've talked with many women about sexual matters, quite openly and unashamedly, without resorting to crude language. There's nothing shocking there, and there shouldn't be. Sex is a major part of life, and it's how we all arrive on this planet in the first place.


The hypocrisy in this statement....


There's none there, and I invite you to Montreal anytime to see these cultural differences in action.
 upstate-gal

Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 38
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:12:36 AM
The men who do this are NOT looking for a quality woman or a long term committed relationship. They are looking for that 100th woman who won't slap them for being so disrespectful.

They do not care if they offend you... cause... they are looking for some cyber-sex and/or a booty call.

The most direct way for them to find the female that will do this is to talk sex right away...after all... they are not interested in anything else, so why should they waste their time with small talk?

Just block them and move on.
 happyrebel

Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 39
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:24:13 AM
As someone pointed out OP, you're only 18. I'm betting that there's lots of pervs out there that send that email to every 18-19 yr old just hoping that she's lying about her age and is only 15 or 16 because they're attracted to very young girls.

Just block the creeps and move on.

HR
 hardcandylick

Joined: 11/19/2007
Msg: 40
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 8:35:09 AM
No one has mentioned this at all, but I guess that everyone wanted to state an opinion first. So time to make an analogy here: You ever go fishing, OP? You know there's a difference between the type of bait and hook that you use to catch trout than say from swordfish, right? If not, that's cool, but take my word for it, there is a difference. So what does all the sh!t mean and how is it relevant?

Simple: Your profile doesn't give anyone that much to go on. I'm not trying to be harsh, but your interests read like a school schedule and the "about you" section doesn't leave much to discuss. So you want to get a guy interested in you for more than just the sex talk, right? Well then, you got to put some more effort into the profile.

The guys that are contacting you see nothing of substance in your profile and smell "fresh meat," especially since you're young and attractive. If you put more of your thoughts and desires about who and what you are looking for, you'd scare away most of these guys. That's not to say that they will leave you alone, it's just to say that maybe you would attract more of what you are looking for.

Like I said, I'm not trying to be rude. I'm just pointing out the obvious, from one Texan to another. Try the profile review section for more help, if you're stuck.
 whitefether

Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 41
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:36:33 AM
I think talking about sex immediately shows a definite lack of intelligence, I mean, there is the world, politics, sports, todays news, etc. etc. If you are so ruled by your genitals that the only thing you can think of to talk about is sex, you definitely are lacking in imagination and social skills.

Sherry
 hazelcat89

Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 42
Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 11:25:57 AM

Like I said, I'm not trying to be rude. I'm just pointing out the obvious, from one Texan to another. Try the profile review section for more help, if you're stuck.


It's fine I didn't take it as rude lol
 ca-soldier

Joined: 7/3/2008
Msg: 43
Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:43:51 PM
[Because.... we're guys?]
Speak for yourself! Some of us actually respect women and wouldnt treat them any more rudely than our own mother or daughter!!
 ca-soldier

Joined: 7/3/2008
Msg: 44
Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:45:02 PM
ULO: [If you don't like the way men are behaving, change your definition of men. Wether it is body type, income, or something else, you might be limiting yourself to these types of men. Prince charming doesn't exsist, you can't have your cake and eat it too, everyone needs to reevaluate how much importance they place on various traits. I'm not saying go overboard and date people you are very unnatracted to, just try pushing the boundries on some of your current limitations.]

BINGO!!! You have to remember, every woman winds up with the type of man that SHE CHOSE!
 trekker013

Joined: 3/24/2007
Msg: 45
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:27:37 PM
OP.......

As mentioned earlier, your profile doesn't say much so how is anyone going to know what you want to talk about?

Plus your profile title is, "Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained"

Well.....they're venturing........
 ca-soldier

Joined: 7/3/2008
Msg: 46
Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:47:24 PM
[You're 18, I'm guessing most of it is coming from guys close to your own age?

Try some older ones out while you wait for these guys to grow up and realize they need to keep some thoughts to themselves until a girl gets comfortable with them.]
I think the OP chooses to ignore the obvious!
 Freedom1981

Joined: 1/24/2007
Msg: 47
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:50:30 PM
I'd have to say several things contribute to this. Firstly, some a lot of dudes have no idea how to talk with women. Theres a time and a place for everything, and first contact isn't it. But hey, theres always that guy at the bar who walks around to every woman and say 'hey wanna $%^&?', and sadly eventually someone says 'Sure!'. Men are horny, and many of us have no idea how to channel that energy. I'd appologize, but thankfully I'm not one of these men.
 kcdn

Joined: 7/17/2007
Msg: 48
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 1:54:16 PM
ia with you sister .. i fell the same way.... sex isnt all that...............
 BaldyisBeautiful

Joined: 3/28/2008
Msg: 49
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 2:24:19 PM
Probably because they think that you PERSONALLY wouldn't be able to understand anything else they would like to talk about such as physics or what Hemingway was thinking about when he wrote the old man in the sea (hehe, yeah right...more like cars and which beer they think will go with their BBQ chicken the best ... which would be Guinness by the way).
 tenino

Joined: 6/2/2008
Msg: 50
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Why Must You talk about Sex.
Posted: 7/8/2008 3:07:51 PM
Woo Hoo Baldy is BACK! Hiya guy

OP they talk about sex because they are boys or maybe young men. They are bundled hormones walking around in sneakers. They may lack upbringing or manners, but basically they're going to try anything that they think you will let them get away with. If you don't like it don't let them. You do know about Delete/Block, right?
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