| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/10/2008 11:48:04 PM |
GentleCanuck, your story was wonderful! Very cool.
Thank you. It was a very beautiful part of my life.
We only parted due to practical reasons. We discussed the breakup for two weeks before making the final decision. It was a joint decision, one that neither of us wanted to make.
It took me twenty years to get over her. She was my soulmate.
I am fortunate to have found another soulmate now, over three decades later. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/11/2008 8:02:39 AM |
If you go for it, have fun, take it for what its worth, get the kid to cut your lawn while he is there too.....But dont expect love.
OMG that's priceless....I love that! 
I don't have lawn to cut, but I can find other chores. ha | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 7/11/2008 12:14:09 PM | not hard to figure that one out!...younger men love older women for a number of reasons..more experienced (wink)..more stable..know what they want..its a total fantasy for them to be with an older woman..look past the age (IF he's mature only!!) and have some fun..you might like it ; ) | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/17/2008 1:07:34 PM | Well I have dated younger men and they have told me that most older women are more mature and settled and less materialistic.
Younger men have more energy, and its refreshing to see things from their perspective.
Just be careful, be upfront about what you are looking for and expect. Enjoy!!! | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/17/2008 3:02:30 PM | | As others stated, mostly sex..There are some who prefer older women and stuff, but mainly it is sex and if anything develops it may be love.. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/17/2008 5:27:11 PM | It's not just sex. I believe once again, it's a matter of preference. Most women like a man w/ experience while there are some who aren't so concerned with that. Just like there a are alot of men who go after younger women just for sex while there are some looking for genuine love.
I've met alot of younger men (who happen to be very persistent by the way) who have the intelligence I wish I could find in men my own age! I have a "HOT little" friend who is MUCH younger than myself that I met on a cruise where we were surrounded by all kinds of beautiful younger women. He could have had his pick and still can for that matter! However after exchanging phone numbers and a feew long distance conversations...this young man felt he was "in love" with me and travelled from across the country to visit me. Maybe he was initally sexually attracted to me but, we've remained really close friends throughout the years and throughout all of his girlfriends and my dating experiences and he still sends cards, gifts, text messages etc. Trust me if he was just interested in sex, he would have been long gone!
I love a man with experience but believe me, I wouldn't be seeking an older man for the sex alone! Maybe they're great but that's not me. By the same token, I shy away from younger men due to their lack of experiences(and not speaking of sexual experiences) so that is why I feel it's a matter of preference.
Why ponder this too much? Accept and love yourself for who are, be happy somebody finds you attractive, don't do anything you're not comfortable with(I understand you have children around the same age as the guys interested in you) and live your life.
Happy fishing and take care!  | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/17/2008 5:33:20 PM | hello OP,
Ahh, young uns eh? I wouldnt puzzle too much over this one OP, we ladies of a certain age all have the same thing going on.. loads of young men emailing us.
They mail us because they are at the 'I'll hump anything stage, hormones rampant, will seek out path of least resistance' or... as a good friend of mine coined it.. 'the lampost humpers', lol.. young men willing to have a go at anything.
Now while there are a very few genuine young men out there really looking for matirity, blah blah blah, the vast majority are only looking for what they perceive to be easier to obtain old meat. a MILF fantasy... they think we are all experienced in the ways of luuuurve, will teach them.. do anything in bed with em.. etc.
At best, they're looking for short term sex..
Some older women can be quite flattered by all the attention from young beautiful things,.. and start to believe that they really are the preference of younger men.. but Ive never seen relationships with big age gaps working out long term.
Unless you want to be some kids MILF fantasy.. i suggest you just smile, shake your head, and pay them no mind.
Lovely as they are to look at... once theyve had their fill of you, they'll be off to boff a younger thing.
G. xx | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/17/2008 5:57:05 PM | Depends on the level of maturity of the young man, I would think ... of course, he is probably looking at the sexual aspect of hooking up with an older woman ... but there could very well be more depth involved.
When I was in my early twenties, I actively dated women in their late thirties and early forties ... why? Because they were so much more appealing then the women my age and far fewer hassles ... it went way beyond the sex ... I liked the level of maturity and awareness that an older woman presented and also knew that they would be good teachers in sharing with me things that women my own age hadn't yet had an opportunity to experience for themselves ... I could and can still appeciate what someone with a little age, wisdom and experience can bring into my own growth curve ... and yes, the sex was hot, too. Fewer inhibitions, far less drama, no worries about any agendas such as marriage or being used because I was making great money ... and often, they were so much more confident in themselves, which was a big turn on ... being with a more mature woman was always a delight ... I am thankful for what I learned in sharing time with an older woman.
jeffery | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/17/2008 8:08:59 PM | You should know that I am extremely sensual.
There it is.
Young men that need on the job training. Sorry to be this blunt, but if you can't see it..... 
Put a restriction on age requirements. Example: everybody above 40 only- can message you. If I was dating, I would personally change my settings to : older than 52. Young men and their inexperience have never impressed me. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 4:32:12 AM | I think it is silly to say the only thing they want is sex.
That is like saying younger girls go for old guys only because of their wallets.
Older women do have a lot to offer. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 6:23:59 AM | | Because if they date a 40 something now when they're 40 something and dating a 23 year old they'll have covered all thier bases? | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 9:05:50 AM | maybe they just like you, or liked your page and want to pursue things further; it could be they are usually too deep or mature for women their age and feel you might relate/connect to them in a better manner.
it could be sex, but that is the case in any situation; but if your not comfortable w/it, then your not open to all ages. At least give the guy a shot to see if he is where u want, need him to be emotionally, mentally, etc; right now your assuming they are missing experiences or mindsets necessary for you to work w/them | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 10:50:37 AM | A 41 year old woman talks about dating a 23 year old man and a lot of people bring up the fact that he must be a MILF hunter yet on other threads where a 41 year old man would ask about dating a 23 year old woman he's called a sicko and a freak.....I don't get the double standard  | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 2:18:21 PM | | Anytime there is a thread about older women - younger men, many people will automatically assume that the younger man is just looking for sex. Of course there are some younger men that just looking for sex, but there are plenty of men ( and some women as well ) all from ALL ages that are just looking for sex. If an older woman isn't interested in younger men, that's fine. But there is no need to make generalizations about any group of people. BTW sometimes it's the older woman who is looking for casual sex with a younger man. This works both ways. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/18/2008 11:01:46 PM | Heheh...
As one poster said: "When I turn 41, and some hot young 23 year old starts making a move on me, I'd be praising Jesus, Allah and Buddha... "
Amen to that! | |
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Mr. S.
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Joined: 12/14/2008
Msg: 43 | |
| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/19/2008 1:24:06 PM | ???
Im sure there are many different reasons.
Myself I find Im attracted to women older than I
maybe 23-41 is a little bit of a gap but........
Im 30 next month and I ideally seek A woman 5+ yrs older than I
here are my reasons for this:
older women are not so fickle and some make better judgment calls.
I also find that alot of women my age are a bit more into the bar/ club scene
something Im not really interested in.
but whatever the reasons a few years difference should not matter much
but if there are too many years in that gap the differences will probably show up
down the line :( | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/19/2008 8:27:59 PM | | Young guys all *know,* from all the MILF-porn they watch on the internet, that all women over 35 are horny and hard up, and looking for a hot young stud! | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/19/2008 8:34:36 PM | | It's just a fantasy that both want to experience in real life. I've been there myself and dated older women. I did it because I felt attracted to them. Obviously we both wanted the same thing - sex. Depending on the age difference, I just can't see why a woman in her 30's for example would have any interest in seeing a guy 10 or more years younger than herself, if not for that fantasy. I'm also sure that in 9 out of 10 cases the woman breaks it off first, leaving the poor kid sad and confused. In any case, such relationships are doomed to failure even before they start. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/19/2008 11:10:09 PM | | It's hard to relate to someone that is mainly inot text messaging. Was in highschool at the same time Lindsey Lohan and Britney Spears was or thinks highschool musical was the coolest movie ever made. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/20/2008 2:17:37 AM | HEY AGE IS JUST A NUMBER. MY BOYFRIEND AND MYSELF ARE SEPARATED BY A 10 YEAR AGE DIFFERENCE AND WE HAVE A LOT OF FUN TOGETHER. HE KEEPS ME YOUNG AND GIVE ME A WHOLE NEW OUTLOOK ON LIFE. I FELT THE SAME WAY YOU DID WHEN HE AND I MET BUT I TELL YOU WE HAVE GREAT COMMUNICATION AND HAVE A REALLY GOOD TIME TOGETHER. I GUESS THE MAIN THING IS LIKE YOU SAID IF HE IS MATURE ENOUGH TO HANDLE SOMETHING REAL. AND AS FAR AS A YOUNG GUY GOING AFTER SOMEONE OLDER YOU KNOW THE SAYING WOMEN ARE LIKE FINE WINE THEY ONLY BETTER WITH AGE. ENJOY YOURSELF ONCE IN A WHILE I'M SURE YOU HAVE ALWAYS PUT EVERYONE ELSE BEFORE YOURSELF AND A YOUNGER GUY MIGHT BE JUST WHAT YOU NEED. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/20/2008 7:56:55 AM | "HEY AGE IS JUST A NUMBER..."
Well, it's actually more than just a number. Someone who's 10 years older has lived 10 years longer. The younger has yet to go through what the older person went through years ago. Also, and this is especially true for women, that getting involved with a much younger guy means that his goal with the relationship is probably not to have kids and live an adult life within the next 10-12 years. Going out, friends all over the place, wasting money, immature and irresponsible thinking is still part of the process of growing up. I see no reason for a 20 year old to think like a 30+ year old or vice versa. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/20/2008 8:50:37 AM | I think most young men are not looking for long term relationships, but they deserve to be evaluated individually. For the reasons mentioned above, it is a popular trend for younger men to date older women. How you choose to respond depends on YOUR goals.
I usually date men about 10 years younger, because that seems to fit me best. But since I am looking for long term, I avoid younger than that. | |
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| 41 and 23??? I'm not ready for this!
Posted: 12/20/2008 9:30:59 AM | I know what you mean. I'm 43 and had not been single since 19, so one of my first dates post divorce last year was with a brit who I assumed was a lot older. Halfway through the date I found out he was 26.
Needless to say, it kind of threw me as my oldest is 19...
I don't get it either. But then I thought when you are older than 40, divorced, homeowner, have a career and teenagers you are raising on your own you were a "spinster". I have been utterly blown away by the well, apparently things have changed in that way... apparently that is not the stereotype anymore, from what I've found at least in my brief sojourn back into the land of dating. ( But speaking of the younger generation, if I get called a milf (sp)? one more time by my daughter's friends I'm going to do something bad...)
Good for you in going for it. More power to you. I just know I'm not ready for this either.. Good luck. | |
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