| |
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 1:50:48 PM | | I hear ya..I also stuck around too long. I was busy building up my life again, so the fact that he didn't quite cut the mustard relationship wise, was, at the time, inconsequencial.He ended up doing something really disgusting, which made it easy for me to bolt.... | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 2:11:48 PM | I have to admit I should have ended it a hell of a lot sooner. My own fault for putting up with his crap when the red flags couldn't get any closer in my face. I also found myself believing his lame excuses for not showing up last minute, but when I gave him enough rope, he eventually hung himself with his lies....lol
p.s. This guy was stringing 2 women on at the same time! | |
|
| |
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 3:43:49 PM | Why is it necessary to use the word wrong to indicate or imply that the perspective you are holding onto regarding that person is that they are wrong, which means the opposite of right which then is you elevating yourself above that individual in the mindset you are holding in regards to that person. Feel better about yourself now at the expense of another? | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 3:52:49 PM | Last relationship! .........Pretty much all my relationships.
My part......I was selfish, dishonest, inconsiderate, narcisistic and did not do intimacy, actually did not know what intimacy was!
Above it all......... i did not know how to love........me for a start....before I could start loving someone else.
My head was well and truely up my arse. ......and I could never see that!
Today I can see it. | |
|
| |
| |
| |
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 5:12:59 PM | "I should have ended it sooner"  The question is more about introspection rather than blaming the other half. I don't think that's what you did wrong. The "wrong" could be something that resulted in your relationship failing e.g. you cheated, drank too much etc. In fact, "not ending it sooner" might be one of the right things that you did, at least you gave it a chance! | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 5:19:55 PM | Realizing that some of those little things that I made an issue are really nothing.
Go with real deal breakers, embrace the differences and know the difference between them. We rarly break up over the obivious or the last thing that happened.
We do often focus on things that really are no big deal. None of us are perfect. And the grass is NOT greener anywhere else. With exceptions naturally. | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 6:39:36 PM | very good post OP ,
one thats had me thinking real hard about mistakes made in previous relationships and making me think about the varoius senarios of my current one. Thank you all , for your honesty with mistakes made, and reminding me of some i've made. Hopefully i can learn from them , and yours, to create a better stronger and lasting realtionship
I gotta say , being totally honest with my self, I think the biggest mistake i ever made in a relationship is taking the Ex for granted , and taking my eye off the ball. Not that i was playing away or bring unfaithful, but that i concentrated more on work than for the woman i used to love. I say used to love because that was nearly 8 years ago. lesson to learn, remember why you go to work.
i gave up our time together, and stopped being a partner in our relationship, for trying to make a buck.
sky dragon, your honesty is amazing, so too is everyone else's ( those who decicded to answer the OP's question. Guys and girls , the question was about you, not your EX | |
|
| |
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 9:03:48 PM | Got extremely comfortable; let myself go (in appearance). Afraid to talk about my feelings. Seventeen years together should really only have been about 10 yrs. We were 'roommates' at the end.
I'm more open about my feelings now; in other words, I am honest about things now. | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/22/2008 9:24:10 PM | I didn't see enough of the little girl in her. I mean, I saw the little girl in her, but wasn't consistent enough in maintaining viewing her in the little girl way so as to better respond to her needs. Although, I'm not speaking of the "last" relationship, I still see this pertinent here.
Clearly I was receptive to her as a whole, which is to say I strove to understand her life and history as best I could. I think this is really the only way to truly understand someone. So, there I am, in retrospect having missed some great opportunities to provide inspiration by communicating to her child. She did have some rough times when young, and like John Mayer sings, "Fathers be good to your daughters"...well, I hope to exercise better parent to child dialogue.
 | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/23/2008 12:16:03 AM | ^^^ Wow, *in*spired, that is profound. I am always so *in*spired by your posts.
I already posted on here in a very polite manner where I assumed my part of the responsibility, but then I saw the thread .. "Anyone ever dated a TRUE narcissist"? I really hadn't read that thread, but when I did, all of the excuses I ever made for someone else's behavior made total sense.
That is what I did wrong in my last relationship .. .denial .. and thank God I only made that mistake once. I still don't know how I allowed it to happen, and I can honestly say that I will never go down that path again to make concessions for someone who's only ever interested in making you an option while you make them your priority. I look around me and once again recognize the many men that are so far from fitting this description in terms of being narcissistic and are such a breath of fresh air. Funny how this seems to be like such a novelty when one is ready to once again go back their old lives of sharing a true sense of friendship and respect with people who really have a true sense of self. It is a feeling like no other; like an awakening, really. To all the men who aren't narcissists; peace. | |
|
| |
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/23/2008 6:01:32 AM | | I haven't read them all, but I see a lot of regrets in here. My last two attempts at a LTR both ended quickly, my choice, simply because I've learned to read those red flags. Don't beat yourself up because you find that your SO isn't who he said he/she is. Just get out. One of my warning signals is guys who profess to be in love with me early on in the relationship. Granted, I AM lovable, but if it's happening too soon, there's usually an agenda. In my case, they both wanted something from me. One wanted me to testify in court that I was his counselor and the other one thought I would let him move in and live off me. Not gonna happen! Even though I want to be loved (who doesn't?) I'm not going to get suckered in by those words. So, what I did wrong is let my needs blind me, albeit briefly. | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/23/2008 12:39:57 PM | | I was just a dumbass. I didn't recognize her on Mothers day because 'she wasn't my mother' and didn't recognize her on Valentines because it's just a fabricated holiday to extort money from consumers. Regardless, it was important to her and I should have seen that. Shaking my head as type this...dumbass. | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/23/2008 6:19:56 PM |
Sorry, who was the jerk, exactly? Him because he was cheating on his girlfriend? Yet, you were cheating on your boyfriend with this jerk?
That's fuuuuuunnny stuff... thanks. I needed a good chuckle this aft.
Nope they were two completely different events.. the guy i cheated on was a while before the fling happened... The guy i cheated on i just didnt give a shit about lol heartless as it may be it is the truth .. but the guy who used me to cheat on his gf i didnt even know about the gf.. i ended it way before the girl sent me a text .. so its definitely a karma thing it just didnt bother me all that much.... i was pretty mean then lol hahah idk but they were silly little mistakes all made out of my immaturity.. i have learned from them and hope i've matured a bit but hey why lie about stuff thats alllll in the past,... w/e its over lol | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/23/2008 10:37:34 PM |
Sorry, who was the jerk, exactly? Him because he was cheating on his girlfriend? Yet, you were cheating on your boyfriend with this jerk?
That's fuuuuuunnny stuff... thanks. I needed a good chuckle this aft.
Nope they were two completely different events.. the guy i cheated on was a while before the fling happened... The guy i cheated on i just didnt give a shit about lol heartless as it may be it is the truth .. but the guy who used me to cheat on his gf i didnt even know about the gf.. i ended it way before the girl sent me a text .. so its definitely a karma thing it just didnt bother me all that much.... i was pretty mean then lol hahah idk but they were silly little mistakes all made out of my immaturity.. i have learned from them and hope i've matured a bit but hey why lie about stuff thats alllll in the past,... w/e its over lol
Wow.... I hope you have matured too. So do all your potential dates. If there's any left! | |
|
| What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship?
Posted: 7/25/2008 3:42:32 PM | ^^^ *****they were silly little mistakes all made out of my immaturity.. i have learned from them and hope i've matured a bit but hey why lie about stuff thats alllll in the past,... w/e its over lol ******
Well .. all I have to say is that there is a 21 yr old girl, less than half my age, two posts above me who has just admitted to sleeping around, admitted that it was done out of her own immaturity, and that she hopefully has matured a bit. Her profile isn't trashy .. it's positive ... and demonstrates as much or more maturity as anyone else's. Wow, isn't this assuming responsibility and accountability?
Sorry ... but she has just admitted things that the holier than thou people twice+ her age refuse to even acknowledge. Not to mention the fact that she said it is all in the past ... so, even if she didn't make the right decisions, she is way ahead of most in terms of living up to her mistakes, learning from them, and the KEY word she used??? ... 'past'. And .. she didn't slander anyone else's post ... imagine that?? Add to her personality the tiniest bit of class, microscopic as it may be at this point, that she is probably not quite aware she is just starting to develop along with her other attributes .. simply because she has kept her mouth shut since she posted instead of beaking off to insults that she very well could have addressed with a 21 year old mindset .....
I could have said, in reference to her age and thought process, 'I am not so young where I know everything'.
But ... she doesn't fit the adage, I struck out !!...... so more power to her for having the maturity at 21 years old to recognize and acknowledge that she isn't perfect like everyone else.
Wow, wish I was 21 years old again so that I could recognize and move on at her age what it took me 40 years to even acknowledge.
| |
|
| |
| |
| |
Home
login 
