| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/2/2009 7:58:06 AM | Great topic, sorry didn't read all 18 pages, I know some of my family couldn't understand how I could be happy and have a fulfilled life without marriage, man and kids! I've also often been mistaken for a lesbian as I've been single for a while!
I have never felt a failure but rather decided I wasn't ready for the responsibility of children, and being single up until now I have loved just feeling ready to dip my toe in the dating scene now!!! | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/3/2009 1:33:25 AM | "WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?"
Is this a real question? I think I would see Santa Claus before I bumped into a 30 year old single female out here that did not have kids.
Your question should be, WHY ARE WOMEN UNDER 30 WHO ARE SINGLE OR DIVORCED WITH THREE KIDS FROM THREE DIFFERENT DADDY"S CONSIDERED A FAILURE? | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/3/2009 10:32:50 AM | EXACTLY!!!!!!!!!!!! im a guy and never wanted kids. I never wanted a woman that did. so I have searched for the right woman for a long time. sometimes settling on women that can no longer have kids. I made a choice, hasent she? ( my future)
why lie about what I want? nor should you.... | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/3/2009 11:12:26 AM | There's preconceived crap out there that women who have settled down with a husband & kids have 'settled' and sold themselves short, and don't have 'real' jobs!
So take your pick...whatever topic, whatever conclusion, there's someone who will second guess/ disagree/criticize.
The real question, OP, is...why do you care what 'they' think...and why are you surprised at all that others hold different opinions?!? | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/3/2009 3:24:49 PM | | That is only what the married and unhappy people say, they just want you to join in their misery. I was unhappily married twice and raised my 2 children alone, now I am free! My married friends live through the fun and adventure I have in my single life! And the last time I checked, it wasn't 1955 anymore. | |
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| No! Rare FINDS is what they are...
Posted: 2/5/2009 10:47:45 PM | OP: actually, women over 30 who are single and childless are quite rare in many parts of the US. Let alone single, childless women in their 30s and 40s who have active, healthy lifestyles...those are ungodly rare!!! (sob, sob!)
I find that this particular demographic is much more readily found in more cosmopolitan urban areas (NYC, LA, Seattle, SF, etc.) or in somewhat artsy college towns (Austin, Berkeley, Ann Arbor) than in most places.
If PoF is any indicator, Canada seems particularly blessed in this respect. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/6/2009 7:35:25 AM | Hi OP,i could not agree with you more,as in most things in life it takes a lot of courage to go against the flow and not bow to peer pressure.I wont ever be a father but its my choice and something i dont regret.Life is hard enough without extra pressure to do something you dont want to do,so i applaud all women who have stood up for themselves under incredible pressure to get married and have children and had the courage not to do so,whatever their reasons may be they have the right to what they want and should never be labelled a failure for doing that.
TI | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/7/2009 6:00:43 PM | [OP: actually, women over 30 who are single and childless are quite rare in many parts of the US. Let alone single, childless women in their 30s and 40s who have active, healthy lifestyles...those are ungodly rare!!! (sob, sob!)]
[I think I would see Santa Claus before I bumped into a 30 year old single female out here that did not have kids.]
RARE female here!!!!! No kids, never married, healthy as wild rat! Heeheehee! And even single! Damn, I knew I was a catch! Well except, where the hell are all they guys with enough gumption to spark up a conversation? Seems like I do all the work and I'm still waiting for it to pay off. Where's my handsome young Buck!!!
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/7/2009 6:12:40 PM | I think you're using the wrong word. It isn't the word failure I hear as much as the constant questions of living outside the box. "Why aren't you married?" "You don't want children?" "Are you a lesbian?"
The way I look at it, I was one of the smart ones who knew children weren't for me instead of having them to avoid the stigmatism society puts on us like there's something wrong. Too many people have children because they feel it's the next step in life without knowing what is involved with having children. I've known since I was in high school that I never wanted children. It takes strength to stand strong for what will make you happy, and my decision grew stronger every year.
At the same time though, you have to respect those wo/men who want children. If you're looking to date, long-term relationship, all parties must want the same thing. It seems many married couples never bothered to discuss children before marriage amongst other things.
As I've told so many, it doesn't matter whether you're married or single, you have to be happy with yourself before you can accept anyone else in your life. Too many people are looking for someone to complete them when they should already feel completed. I'd rather be alone and lonely then with someone and lonely. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/7/2009 8:59:34 PM | So so true. I would give about ANYTHING to find a woman who had no kids & wants no kids. I meet women & when they learn that I don't want any, boom, they are gone. I don't have a problem with those who want kids of course, but I don't get the fascination with women who think they "have" to have them to feel like a real woman, get a puppy, at least they are a smaller obligation. Show me the women with no kids, I'd pay good for 1 of them! | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/8/2009 5:35:05 AM | | The men who seek women who are over 30 without children need to look for a teacher to date. Maybe the young, single ones want to have children, but for me it was never a goal. Guess that I meet my maternal instinct teaching so many of them. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/8/2009 8:12:25 AM | ~well, i say it's all in how we want out lives to be~
Sure. No one's stopping you going that route but don' t blame the world for a pre-conceived notion. It is what it is and that's why women over 30 with no kids and/or single are a pure failure. It is very true. Don't try and change that.
Now, instead of taking a vote in a public room and gaining sympathy from others like you, make the effort and change your own life. Single women over 30 don't have to be smart and goal oriented at all. They should concentrate on making babies, cooking, cleaning and sorting out bills. That's the way it is and that's the way it will be. Don't fight it, join it - you and the rest of them out there! | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/8/2009 10:23:18 AM | | To be more clear on my last post, I mean to point out that single women with no kids & over 30 are NOT failure! They are rare gems. I think they are awesome. I was commenting on a note from the person who said how great the women are when I said "so true". They have been my prime search for years. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/10/2009 10:32:44 AM | I have seen how badly some men have treated women, and vise versa, more though with the way the men treat the women.. I'd rather stay single if that is how people are..
Alot of people, or some stay in abusive or disfunctional relationships, when they are better off alone, you may be lonely, but you would have more well being, and self worth, and be better off alone in your life in the long term! | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/24/2009 4:02:37 PM | i think its great to meet awoman who does not have kids it makes things alot easier ...i would not class them as anything other than its their life if they did not haveor could not have or did not want kids its all good ...i have nothing against single mums ......but would rather date a woman without kids anyday....its merely choice they are definetely not failures ...in anyway | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/24/2009 5:03:46 PM | | Wow, I am in awe of the ingonrance and complete disrespect for women this "fun tall" individual has. Notice he has been on this site since 2005....hmmmmmm. **scratches head** LOL. I am a single women with no children and I am single by CHOICE. I refuse to settle and actually LOVE my single life. I chose my career over a man and it has worked out very well for me thus far. My singleness in no way takes away how beautiful I am and what a wonderful "catch" I am. The man who ends up with me will truly be blessed. We all make choices in life that lead us to our current circumstances. I for once am very pleased with my choices. I think that regardless of whatever state we find ourselves in we should be happy and content. I just pray that each and every woman that is over 30, 40, 50, etc. learns to celebrate their life and does not allow a person that obviously knows nothing life influence their self image. Peace out sistas!!! | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/24/2009 5:29:13 PM | *shrug*
I actually have people telling me how they wish they could be single and without children when they find out how often I get to travel from state to state for my job... and from country to country for leisure.
Nowadays I hear more and more people whining about their spouse and kids and wishing they could be over 30 without the spouse and kids...
Ah.........yes..... they see freedom, not failure.
But of course there are those who fanatically have their views of how and when a woman should have family.........they remind me of people in those compounds..lol
I've said enough...
Ciao!
L
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/25/2009 6:38:40 AM | thats just an old fashioned stereotype, i'm not sure where it is coming from. Some people believe that it is a woman duty to have children and contribute to the next generation. Then again i've seen many women go into a state of self doubt, regret, resentment and even depression over not having conceived. In my opinion there are 3 major reason why women have children
1- personal desire
2- unsafe sexual practice
3- societal or peer pressure
of course there maybe others but these are the primary reasons and or excuses.
Over All, having children is a personal choice not an obligation or fullfillment of someone elses beliefs, ambitions or ignorance.
If you took a look at the world today do you honestly belive that the human race would cease to exist if even half the population of women stopped having children?
Life was given to you to enjoy, how you chose to is up to you and you alone.
In conclusion, my question to you is how do you personally feel about not having children...
- incomplete - content
- unfulfilled - no regrets
or just happy to be who you are and live your life the way you chose. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 2/26/2009 12:02:07 AM | Uh...I don't feel like a failure. I don't want kids yet. If I meet a man that makes me laugh like my sister does, makes me feel at home just by being there and can look at me and know what I'm thinking, then I'll marry him. If I never meet that man, then my toilet seat stays down and I get to watch any damn thing I want on TV.
If they start to give you hard time, tell them you thought about getting married, but decided that you still liked sex. | |
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