| I think they're terrific for not succumbing to the social pressures of "I do."
Posted: 6/30/2005 9:00:56 AM | | I don't think anyone should get married before the age of thirty. I think popping out babies and saying "I do" before you know who you are and what you are made of is a huge mistake. Mind you, there are acceptions to the rule. Some people are meant to be together, but I think the majority of people who marry do so for the wrong reasons. No wonder the divorce rate is so high. It seems that in North America, people are either divorced or onto their second marriage by the time they hit the big 30. There is a reason for this. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 6/30/2005 11:26:54 AM | rusys4evergirl,
I'm sorry you feel that way.. I've actually just celebrated my 32nd birthday, and I'm single/unmarried with no children.. I certainly don't feel like a failure -far from it- and I have never encountered anyone who judges me by my marital status and/or by the fact of whether or not I have had any children.. I've always lived my life by my own standards and expectations.. Referring to the people you encounter, who hold these preconceptions, does it really matter what they think, and whether their veiws are 'right' or 'wrong?' At the end of the day, who's life is it? Yours - so you should just disregard what everyone else thinks on the matter, and keep on living your life as you choose. (and have a ball doing it!!  ) | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 6/30/2005 2:26:40 PM | If someone feels that way, then they are not people that I want in my life.
I am single, 34, and a mommy, and have no regrets. does it really matter in the grand scheme of things that I wasnt married? No, I know who I am and what I want out of life. I am a good person with a good heart and try to be nice to those around me.
If someone has a problem with me and my life, too bad, they can just stay away from me. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 6/30/2005 4:26:53 PM | I think self-satisfaction is the only meaningful measure of success or failure. Are you happy? Then you're a success!
That having been said, I find that most childless women over 30 seem to either want a husband/family but are only attracted to the type of men who aren't good partners, or else they watched too many episodes of sex and the city and are totally materialistic, just want to be wined and dined, and really shouldn't be reproducing anyway. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/1/2005 7:36:03 PM | | For those "English as a Second Language" students in the audience, when someone says they find that most of a group of people exhibit certain traits or characteristics, it implies that they are talking about the majority of people they have met, not that they have met the majority of a group of people. Understand now? Or did I use too many big words? | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/1/2005 9:47:20 PM | | Exactly! That's the point. If you've defined success in a certain way, then its up to you to find a mirror and see for yourself how your life measures up against that. Nobody else's standards should matter. I'd have to consider myself a semi-success and semi-failure. I'm very satisfied with some aspects of myself and my life, and not too happy about some others, but hey, we're all still works in progress, right? | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/2/2005 12:12:52 AM | For those "English as a Second Language" students in the audience, when someone says they find that most of a group of people exhibit certain traits or characteristics, it implies that they are talking about the majority of people they have met, not that they have met the majority of a group of people.
Well thanks OH PARAGON OF ESL (my first language IS english, by the way).
Do you know what the word most means? It's a fairly small word, but the insult was a really nice touch. Classy. Oh.. if you meant MOST WOMEN I KNOW.. why not add those last 2 words? Say what you mean and all that kind of jazz? Hmm? Perhaps because the "I KNOW" wasn't really in your condescendingly superior mind at the time??
That's got to be the ticket..
My VALID question stands.
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/2/2005 4:41:08 AM | Look dudes and dudettes women are not a failure when thay are 30+ and single and childless. I think in today standards if you are married before 30 you are considered a failure. Most women have carreers and don't have time to be with children before ther 30. The average doctorerate degree takes 10 yrs. Well that puts you at 28 getting out of school. then 5 years estabblishing your carreer. OOPS that puts a women at 33 before she is ready to get married then Ad 2 years in the relationship that puts a women at 35 before having kids. I guess this is why most responsible women aren't having kids till there mid 30's. OMG!!!!!!!!!!
So the only failure here, are the idiotic men and women for putting down responsible women to wait till she is established to get married and have her children or child | |
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ozman
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Joined: 6/13/2005
Msg: 89 | |
| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/2/2005 6:04:22 AM | Jeepers Pet lion, thats wonderful, exactly what I've been trying to say since page 2 of this thread. Seriously though, our careers ( not spelt carreers ) are never advanced enough, we are never mature enough and we never have enough money to get married and have children. We do it because we are in love and want to make it work, for better or worse. It would be interesting to look at the divorce stats of people married at 30+, I would hazard a guess that it's no different to under 30s.
As for people doing docterates, now really, how many people do you know that are doing one ? if not, most people have finished their studies by 25 years of age. I really believe that part of the whole marriage/ parenting thing is about growing and learning together, you find your boundaries and common goals and mature together, sounds kind of nice hey ? That's the way it use to work, no excuses, you just made it work, especially for the kids. Now it seems so easy to get divorced, socially acceptable, the government will assist you and you can even have a socially acceptable divorce party, very sad.
I think that there is a particular age for both men and women that is condusive for marriage, children and flexibility, we really need the flexible bit. I say this after meeting many ladies over 30 with no kids, there was no room in there lves to change or to accept some one elses way of doing things, they we too staid, too caught up in their career, I think that they missed the boat. I Know that I'm asking for trouble by what I've written so, lets do it, always open to being corrected | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/2/2005 7:07:46 AM | Ozman get over the typos. when they put spell check on this then there will be less typos.
I'm nt sur if I knw how to spll.
Lets see doctors and lawyers take 10 years to finish there education. A Masters takes 5-7 years depending ont what there taking. There is nothing wrong with having no children. The world is over populated anyway. So lets start adopting more. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 8/1/2005 2:59:40 PM | I don't see nothing wrong with a woman over 30, who has never had a child... I think they are awesome and a Godsend to many other women and men... I worship them. I don't have to have a child to be happy. If you're happy, you're happy and it doesn't have to revolve around the procreation part of it... I'm actually happier, that I don't have kids... I have more freedom and don't have to plan when to go out, go on a date, or do anything... If I want to do something, boom, I'm gone and doing it...
Jody | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 9/28/2005 8:32:27 PM | | hey - i am single (again) and with kids......i do not care how old you are or whether or not you have kids....you are only a failure, if you, and you alone, see yourself as a failure. it does not matter what others think about you - who are they to judge! just because we have different jobs, different standards of living, different styles/tastes, different goals...etc...,it does not mean that one person is successful while another person is a failure....we all have made various choices in our lives and have taken different paths, all of which have helped us try to gain personal insight and happiness.....but those choices and paths do not define success and/or failure....only we can do that! | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 9/29/2005 5:33:46 PM | rusys4evergirl:
I have met up with lots of preconceived crap about how a woman my age should be settled down with a husband and have kids!!!!
Well, i say it's all in how we want out lives to be, not all women will be mothers, not all men will be fathers! but that does not make us any less human. the times are changing and we should all be allowed to be who we are, not what others expect us to be.
KUDOS to you rusys4evergirl, You hit the nail BANG, DEAD ON the head.
I agree totally, and whole heartedly, that both woman AND men, should beable to live their lives the way they want to live them, and NEVER by what others expect us to be. It is womans and mens choices if they wish to become Mothers and Fathers or not. Therefore, times ARE changing, so society had better change with it as well.
Sincerely
GLBTH | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 9/29/2005 5:53:25 PM | AMEN rusys4evergirl! Good for you!
I have no doubt that I would make a much better mother and wife now that I would have in my 20s. I waited because it was the right thing to do and I do enudre the questions and judgements because of it. But if I had it to do over, I would do nothing differently.
Good luck to you. | |
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| WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/1/2005 1:14:34 AM | Hey good one carlyjones, good one. Talk about FREEDOM, got to LOVE IT. However, it would be interesting to see what the resonse would be from an over 30's woman, with a husband, and/or children. Hmmm, that would be a good topic of debate between a single woman with no kids, and a married woman with kids and a husband.
Sincerely
GLBTH | |
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