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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/23/2008 4:44:50 PM | I'd want honest.
A man who gives compliments that are total bullsh** is useless. It means you can't believe a word that comes out of his mouth.
I'd much rather hear "omg, GO BACK IN THERE AND CHANGE"....or "time for tooth whiteners.." or "hm. Got this steak a little CHARRED didn't you?".........
Because then it makes "omg, you look GREAT" and "You are so strikingly beautiful" and "this is the best damn steak I've ever eaten"...actually MEAN SOMETHING. | |
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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/23/2008 5:01:08 PM | You know, being overly honest seems to be a problem for me, not in the way the OP stated, but in terms of myself. Like I will tell people too much about my past and it ends up freaking them out I think. I have totally changed from what I used to be like and I tell folks that I can prove it beyond any shadow of a doubt if they ever wanted me to. But I will not lie to someone or withhold information that I think they need to know about. First of all because I don't think it's fair to withhold said information, but secondly I want to make sure I will not ever be put in those situations again. Unfortunately, I think that I let it out too soon a lot of the time and it ends up making people judge me and decide I'm not OK to be around.
That's the price I pay though! | |
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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/23/2008 5:04:16 PM | | Yes, if you think my new jeans make my butt look wide, my chocolate cake tastes like dog feces, or my new couch is hideous I want you to tell me so. Everyone I know knows that they can say whatever they want to me. I don't lie to people to make them feel better and I don't want anyone to do that to me. | |
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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/23/2008 6:40:49 PM | There is honesty, and honesty with tact....I think most folks want the tact...for example: if I am IN THE STORE, and only trying on a dress, I need the truth- "Nope, not that one, lets try another one". If I have already purchased it, or put it on and am OUT IN PUBLIC, the tactful truth might be more along the lines of :"It looks ok, but I really like the way the other one brings out your _______(insert a positive feature here) better"...but AT NO TIME, EVER, even thought I too, value honesty, is it ever going to be ok with me for a man,especially one I am interested in, to tell me "Honey, you look flat-chested, and your rear looks like a rhino"
As far as her cooking goes...yeah brutal honesty is likely to get a person hurt, but to say something like "It was really thoughtful of you to cook for me, thank you" does not hurt you, and maybe she only runied that one recipe.
As far as the drunks go, yeah, either be brutal, they will, in their drunken stupor, forget it, or pacify them by lying, they can be brutal themselves. Its your safety at stake, so use your best judgement. | |
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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/28/2008 3:54:39 AM | My sister and I may be from the same gene pool, but we are very different in so many ways. One area in which we are almost opposites is the way we dress. I like vibrant colors, like turquoise, red, and purple, with a bit of chocolate brown thrown in the mix. She wears predominantly black or navy outfits, and sometimes chooses rust or khaki green.
When we were younger, if she asked me what I thought of an outfit, I would usually respond with something like, "Why don't you wear something with a bit more pizzazz. You have such beautiful skin and the black isn't flattering,." That sort of response would have her muttering something about why she even bothered to ask me. Now I will simply comment on the fit of the outfit rather than the color. She appreciates that sort of response much more than the one in which I tried to influence her choice. | |
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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/28/2008 4:54:10 AM | | Honesty only matters when it happens to be what the girl wants to hear. In all other situations, tell her what she wants to hear. Unless you want her to dump you, then by all means, be honest with her. | |
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| is honesty always best?
Posted: 7/28/2008 8:01:42 AM | The thing about little lies is that it makes me think "If you will lie over something so insignificant, you clearly would have no problem lying about something that matters".
About the meal? It would be best to tell me you don't like it ... otherwise I will make it again for you next week...
About my clothes? If I feel good in what I am wearing, I won't ask if it looks good or not. If I am unsure and asking, I want your honest opinion ... but be gentle.
If i was drunk and puked in my hair and honestly couldn't figure out I looked real bad, please laugh at me and say "yah, you look like sh!t"... and help me to clean myself up!
Like others have said, there are always ways to be honest ... but gentle. "Does my ass look fat in these jeans?" "Well, they really aren't that flattering..try another style." Besides, not all people make good liars. Sometimes facial expressions say it all anyway. It is not a good thing when your words don't match the look on your face...
Yes, some of us want honesty. | |
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