| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:29:13 AM | i never heard a woman blame a man for weight gain...where did this come from?
To answer this question asked by sapphire, I was reading old posts on here and some woman was very determined to blame her weight gain on her ex. It cracked me up because it's his fault he taught her how to open the fridge door? It's his fault she's eating because she's nervous? Take it to counseling!
I have personally gained weight for the past 2-3 years. MY FAULT. I just never thought to get in a huff and blame someone else. It's not a man's fault I have affairs with Ben and Jerry, Mr. Taco Bell, Senor Cuervo, Vladimir Smirnoff, and I hang out in the Olive Garden in my spare time.  Yes, I have heard of the blame casting because of a pregnancy - that's all good humored. It's the people that are seriously blaming somebody else. I just never thought to blame others - instead it's my problem, up to me to find the cause and fix it, up to me to use the treadmill as something than a place to hang my ironing. I just figured for kicks and grins, I'd request input. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:32:12 AM | i never heard a woman blame a man for weight gain...where did this come from?
Me either it almost seems like an attention seeking post..I won't say what else I think because I'm working on being a nicer person.
Beavenhouse, you can be as rude and nasty as you want. I don't care. The question was general, not pity seeking, not aimed at anyone and if you are too dense to realize that, then get help. No wonder you're on this site and still single - too busy looking for fault and reasons to hate people. You seriously lack a decent sense of humor. Lighten up, life is too short to walk around with a rod up your anus. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:36:23 AM | | My ex boyfriend blamed me for his weight gain quite easily...it had nothing to do with the fact that he drank too much and ate horribly. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:55:50 AM | | My ex loved my cooking. I guess she could blame me :P | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 9:56:39 AM | One thing I find extremely funny on TV these days are those lap-band people. "I've lost so much weight" - BUT THEY LOOK THE SAME!!!!! I mean if they really wish to sell the product, wouldn't it look better to transpose images and cover that 300-pound chunk of glory with a perfect 10, 105 pound body? I can tell you there is no way I would allow anyone to go inside my bod if the surgery doesn't work better than what the commercials on TV.
Oh...and for those of you who think I am self-pitying - nope...When I started gaining weight due to my fine diet - FAULT OF MY OWN - NO PITY REQUIRED - I bought a Bow-Flex, starting walking every day, aerobics 1/2 hour every day. There's no reason for pity since pity doesn't burn calories. It's called GET OFF DA BOOTY AND EXERCISE - DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
Casting blame - nobody has seen me sue McDonalds for my secretary spread, so I am obviously not that upset. Instead it seems folks are jealous or insecure themselves so they have to spew negative remarks not necessary - and gentlemen, note - they were both women, which is why I clearly stated in the post - ONE CANNOT POST THIS KIND OF THING ON THE ASK-A-GIRL FORUM. Now you see why. Strikes a nerve in some - obviously. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 10:25:25 AM | As someone who several years ago lost a large amount of weigh (76 lbs), I am going to be very blunt.
The only person to blame for your weight gain is the person raising the fork to their mouth. That's it. Yes, there are some people who gain weight because of illness, but there are far more people who gain weight due to eating too much and lack of exercise. When I did weigh a lot it was due to emotional eating, not an excuse but a reason and my own fault.
I work very hard to maintain my weight, I do indulge and I love to cook, but I also work out five days a week and keep a good balance. I know the struggles of weight loss very well and the pain that is associated with being overweight, but you have to remember how you got there and why you got there, but most important you have to remember it is you who got you there not anyone else. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 12:06:10 PM |
Beavenhouse, you can be as rude and nasty as you want. I don't care. The question was general, not pity seeking, not aimed at anyone and if you are too dense to realize that, then get help. No wonder you're on this site and still single - too busy looking for fault and reasons to hate people. You seriously lack a decent sense of humor. Lighten up, life is too short to walk around with a rod up your anus.
Did I hit a nerve? I said it seemed attention seeking and considering your reaction, I must be on the right track. I don't hate anyone nor do I find it necessary to post threads elevating myself on the back of other people.
Nice shaming language "dense" "lack decent sense of humor" "you're on this site and still single" you must be a joy to spend an evening with.
Actually most women blame themselves for being overweight and loath themselves for it. To take an a few isolated cases where people have attempted to hold a fast food chain liable to uphold a generalized theory is weak. Bigoted gender bias threads do little to improve the relationship between men and women, which goes against the purpose of a dating forum. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 12:41:37 PM | Hey Beave -
You must be completely illiterate in that my profile clearly states I am not on this site to date - I like the forums.
Fat women should blame themselves, in large part, no pun intended. If one doesn't wish to list all fast food joints and/or every fattening recipe in a cookbook, that's one prerogative - oh that's right, you're illiterate and obviously cannot read a profile - Ask your neighbor for help with that big-bad-word....Yes, honey, it's spelled correctly.
I don't know if fat women, thin women, smart ones or dumb ones...list goes on....hate themselves - that's the individual's problem. I happen to like me and I am quite comfy in my own skin. Those like yourself casting stones at my glass house is usually guilty of that which they themselves hate within their own makeup - - so you hating yourself is your problem and you are trying to throw your own personal issue onto me. Get help for yourself before you hit the fridge again. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 12:50:41 PM | ^^^ Holy crap you're insane.
I never said you were here to date, nor read your profile. My statements are isolated to this thread. What is awesome is you're making yourself look worse with each dumbass insult. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 1:12:30 PM | I see the OP really wanted to start a fat-bashing thread...sorry OP, but I know 6 people who've had lap-band surgery...all look GREAT! Yes, there tends to be a bit of sagging, but all I know who've had it have changed that by exercising and one had some surgery to fix it.
You're doing a lot of generalizing. Lots of women will blame someone else for their weight gain, lots of men will blame someone else and lots of people who have lap band surgery do well with it.
You're also jumping on Ms. Beavenhouse accusing her of some perceived insult towards you...you were on her like stink on a skunk after her first short post. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 1:45:25 PM | The media has been blaming men for women's problems since feminism started. While it's true that SOME things are because of male chauvinism, it's got so out of control that pretty much everything has been blamed on men, including the fact that girls used to get worse grades than boys. On the other hand, women are NEVER blamed for men's problems. So it's always the man's fault, ever since the sixties.
Woman too fat = man's fault.
Woman too thin = man's fault.
Man too fat = man's fault.
Man too thin = man's fault.
Woman unhappy because she's dieting = man's fault.
Man spends too much in the gym = man's fault.
Man is too attractive to other women = man's fault.
There is no end to this.
At some point, women need to stand up and say: This ISN'T a man's fault!
Thank you very much for this thread, OP. More women need to read this and take note. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 1:49:40 PM | What I said was I would not have the surgery looking at the people on the commercial. I don't meet people and ask them - HEY HAVE LAP BAND? HOW'S IT WORKIN' FOR YA? If it works, great...this the first time I have heard anything positive about it outside the TV commercials.
Oh...and she wasn't jumping on me with her short little post being hateful towards me with accusations about self-pity? She's having issues - thinkin' she's fat, hatin' life over it. Buy a Bowflex, work out, join Jenny Craig or get the lap band and get online and say how wonderful it is since that is quite rare. No one hears that success story like we did regarding stomach stapling years ago, which I know that works and I know people who had that. However, no thanks - it sounds painful and I don't like hospitals - so again, I prefer to join a gym, eat what I want and exercise more - MY FREEDOM OF CHOICE - MY FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHT.
Rhett, you can start your own thread and hate thin people. I don't care what you do. You don't like fat people blaming others post, then don't read it. Peruse over the category. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 2:17:30 PM | OP, take it down a notch will you. I think your original thought was more of an exception than a rule. It is true that most women who are overweight blame themselves and not anyone else.
And how is Rhett hating thing people? You need to calm down. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 3:11:49 PM | My ex had some bearing on my weight gain but was by no means responsible for it. Forst, let me just say I've never been exactly thin so that wasn't it but his idea of dinner was 3 triple cheese burgers, 2 large fries, and a large shake. That was perfectly acceptable to him and, when he was younger, his metabolism let him get away with it. Unfortunatly, he would bring home similar things for me. He thought it was perfectly normal to eat multiple burgers in a sitting. When I didn't eat what he had brought home, he would tell me I needed to eat more than that because I couldn't possibly be full.
Now, all that said, I'm the only one that took the next bite. Nobody forced it on me. My metabolism is slower than normal and I need less to fuel my body than he did. Additionally, I was on meds that made me gain and I was depressed. I didn't take care of myself well enough and there is only me to blame for that. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:40:27 PM | A woman living alone can live mostly on salad, fruit and low-fat treats like air-popped popcorn. Most men would not be at all impressed with this, they would be HUNGRY!! Most men actively dislike salad or tolerate it every so often rather than considering it a dietary staple. So salads get exchanged for cooked meals of substance... there is someone to bake for again and once the baking is there, yes you are going to eat some yourself too -- it would be weird not to... the house suddenly contains stuff you'd never buy or bake as a single woman and the temptation of a well-stocked cupboard full of treats is so much harder to resist. Then they introduce you to new foodstuffs too -- my special someone introduced me to tortilla chips... (not buying any more now!).
That's an interesting idea. I eat like a pig, and consists of a lot of meat, cheese, sugar and grease.
And I'm still hungry!
Low calorie meals make me feel tired and sick.
Have you gotten the gift of Ranch Dressing on your side of the world yet? You can dip a perfectly normal vegetable in it, like a carrot, broccoli, or whatever, and add a delicious 75 calories per tablespoon!
I prefer to join a gym, eat what I want and exercise more - MY FREEDOM OF CHOICE - MY FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHT.
ONE CANNOT POST THIS KIND OF THING ON THE ASK-A-GIRL FORUM. Now you see why. Strikes a nerve in some - obviously.
Welcome to my hell.
I like you, we can rage together. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:53:00 PM | As a rule, I've been known to get thin from the newness, fun, etc., in a new relationship and then when comfortable, eat more, and I also love to cook and if a man does too then.... and fireworks. I went from thin to curvy around my 40th birthday. The factors were turning 40 and that metabolism thing, and my beau at the time and I were both passionate cooks. Our weekends were frequently filled with making fabulous meals, drinking wine, and hanging out watching Foodtv. We both gained and although broken up, we are still friends and we have lost most of our weight...although he more than me  as his work is more physical than mine. I do not blame him in the least and we had fun.  | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 7:31:44 AM | Jm...I'll give you credit, you have a vivid imagination.
Where on earth did I say I hate thin people?
What I "dislike" is people who make generalized comments based on their own perception of a few cases they've seen or heard about.
What I "dislike" is people who get pissy because they want to freely bash others but can't take it when someone calls them on it.
And no, I don't like fat people blaming others...it's called being responsible for your OWN crap.
I prefer to join a gym, eat what I want and exercise more Well, I guess that just makes you so much better than others...good for you. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:46:22 AM | | Women are delusional and like to blame men for all their problems. Men are smart enough to shut up about it or risk not getting sex. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 11:48:51 AM |
Women are delusional and like to blame men for all their problems. That's the quote of the year.
I guess that's why there are so many threads started about women being so mean and some men blaming women because they can't get a date. Sure.
How about:
"Some women are delusional and blame men for some of their problems and some men are delusional and blame women for some of their problems. Yet, some people are smart enough to realize that they might need to look inside themselves to see where their problems began." That makes a LOT more sense. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 12:10:15 PM | Rhett, you shouldn't bother correcting/editing someone's post so it suits your preference:
How about:
"Some women are delusional and blame men for some of their problems and some men are delusional and blame women for some of their problems. Yet, some people are smart enough to realize that they might need to look inside themselves to see where their problems began." That makes a LOT more sense.
^^^ That is not what the poster claimed.... in my opinion, it doesn't make sense to edit someone else's thoughts - whio gets to edit your thoughts? Freedom of speech makes for a more entertaining environment. Doing as you did makes things mundane, boring and uninteresting to comment on.
Besides, I like cat fights - lol.
On topic:
In many cases I find spouses who gained weight in their marriage only to lose it all, once divorced, are the frauds. History repeats itself often. Chances are those spouses who blamed an ex for their weight gain usually regain that weight in their following long term relationship(s).
It begs to ask: Is it still the ex's fault you got fat again? | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 1:36:50 PM | My I: Seeing as you're promoting freedom of speech, I guess you only think that covers speech that meets with your approval?
I didn't "edit" his thoughts...I simply made a point that there is no such thing as "all women do this" or "all men do that".
Doing as you did makes things mundane, boring and uninteresting to comment on. I'm not so sure...it got your back up, didn't it?
Thanks, though. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 2:03:19 PM | There is only ONE person to blame for weight gain. To find out who that person is, simply go and stand in front of a mirror.......
Peace | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 2:16:07 PM |
My I: Seeing as you're promoting freedom of speech, I guess you only think that covers speech that meets with your approval?
I didn't "edit" his thoughts...I simply made a point that there is no such thing as "all women do this" or "all men do that".
About freedom of speech.... you suggest that his thoughts should be realigned to appease you... not me.
The important thing is Rhett, you are assuming that all women he has known/met don't meet his criteria. How can you prove him wrong?
I'm not so sure...it got your back up, didn't it?
Don't pat yourself on the back. Predictable behaviour from such people don't get to me.
On topic:
A person's eating habits exposes where fault lies in regards to many, if not most, weight problems. I've dined with BBW's who claim to be on diets or "I'm gonna start a diet.....soon." . But.... their entree order is reflective of a false claim.
Some of them blamed the price of healthy foods as the reason for not improving their diet possibly because they never had an ex to blame. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 5:53:37 PM |
The important thing is Rhett, you are assuming that all women he has known/met don't meet his criteria. How can you prove him wrong? Hmmm, let's see...he didn't say "women I've met"...did he? He said nothing about his criteria, he made a blanket statement about "women"...not "women I've met". Just another person blaming the opposite sex for their own issues.
About freedom of speech.... you suggest that his thoughts should be realigned to appease you... not me Oh, but you're telling me to do the same thing that you have a problem with...nice try, though.
Don't pat yourself on the back. Predictable behaviour from such people don't get to me. And I'm still getting to you...keep 'em coming, you're not really proving anything. You're getting a little predictable yourself, and only after 2 posts...come on, at least make it challenging. | |
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| Weight Gain Blame
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:49:14 PM |
Women are delusional and like to blame men for all their problems. Men are smart enough to shut up about it or risk not getting sex.
Whipped is the only word that comes to mind.
Tonight I ate a sunday from DQ and I'm going to blame this thread for making me insecure.  | |
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