| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/1/2004 7:53:15 PM | Hmmm...let's see. He sounds like a tool...I'll fiddle a bit and get right back here with it. You can time me if you want...
Ready? Okay...go!! | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/1/2004 8:00:39 PM | My Neighbour is a Tard
My neighbour is as dumb as a doorknob
No
He's dirt-stupid
Dehydrated rock-hard stupid
The black-hole of stupidity
From which
Even light and good sense
Cannot escape
It takes him a week
To cook Minute Rice
He screwed up Jello
Once so badly
The HazMat team had to come in
And remove it
He stared at a can of orange juice
Because the directions said "concentrate"
He spends his time in Wal-Mark
Looking for the elusive maggots
And is directed to a nearby bait shop
He thinks the world is stupid
For not stocking
Dear pork chops
================
Okay...time!
How'd I do? | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/1/2004 8:14:35 PM | Nope. From the sound of it I don't think he could find his arse with both hands in a well-lit room.
Duh.
Ah, well... | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 7:07:54 AM | hi there Goat....
just dropping by before my next flight.. nice to read your thread once again....i have so much of a busy days....hope to post here soon... | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 6:03:36 PM | Hello X_Angel...good to know you're still alive. Remember to breathe once in a while in between running from catastrophe to disaster. I also look forward to your post. Be good.
So...how would you like to know how I spent my day? Yes you do:
====================
How I Spent My Day
I spent the day with
My head up my ass
It was very quiet
But
The smell was
Not the best
And sitting at a desk
Became awkward
But the peace
Was well worth it
====================
Give it a try when you're busy. Sure, walking anywhere becomes difficult...but, man, that sound of blood rushing in your ears is so therapeutic.
Well...I may be back later on. Greets to all who brave this barn. Even you lurkers...hi lurkers!!
Kiss kiss. | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 6:06:17 PM | *blinks*
er um ... waves to a goat on the way to the moat
where a princess once dwelled
as she turned and smelled
her own ass she did
but could not get rid
of the smell
LOL
hearts and hugzzzz to yah goaty me lass | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 6:18:44 PM | Aye and to ye, me lass.
Actually, I've never been called a lass before....should I sit with my knees together when I wear me kilt? I can't remember...
Hi Zee...good to see ya in here.
The smell ain't so bad
In fact it could be a fad
Some say it's kinda rad
You'll be too sick to be sad
Er...something like that.
Hugs to ye too... | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 6:36:07 PM | lol, not sure, its either that way or "infectuous" no.. that dun look right either..
*shrugs
my day was chaotic as usual goat, buttttt an end is in sight..
I have decided after much thought to step back from one of the titles i had career wise, and focus on the one (was a dept manager and account manager, dumped the dept mgr position)..
feels good, breathing a little easier i think
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 6:42:30 PM | Yeah...oddly enough I was given my new job description today. Apparently I'm an administrator -- but what I administrate is a mystery. Today I spent the day administering my stapler around the desk and administered a chain of paperclips. Then I orchestrated a nap.
Not a real bad day, really.
Never been a manager, but I know people who are. They don't like it one bit.
Glad to know the drop was worth it. Everyone needs time to sniff the roses -- once their heads are gently extricated from their colonic orifices. Even me. | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 7:01:22 PM | ooooo i like that...
"extricated from their colonic orifices"
mind if i use that?? i do work with someone who has her head so far up her ass it would require a crane to remove it.
*goes back to looking for a proctologist to perform the very delicate "removemybossfrommyassectomy" | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 8:22:08 PM | Hey, it's all yours if you want Holly. I think I may have borrowed it from someone myself.
And, really, why use a crane when a gentle kick will get the process rolling? I prefer the gonch-pull technique myself but that's just me.
Good luck. | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 9:05:04 PM | well thanggggg kyaaaaaaaa darlin
I'm workin on a "to goat with lerveee" poem.. will see if its worthy enough to post.. may take a bit..lol
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/2/2004 9:11:49 PM | I know it'll be great. And don't worry too much about quality. I mean, look at the stuff I dole out.
"To goat with lervee"? Sounds kinda Irish...like Mull of Kintyre, or Mule of Carcinogens, or Man of Lowgrowthpotential...
...
Hmm....you may have inspired me...careful... | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/3/2004 8:15:26 PM | I slept well, Holly...you?
Well, this one ain't worth waiting for. If you were waiting for this, I pity you. I took an idea and I may have carried it too far. I just came from a buffet dinner and I've had too much to eat. Actually, I have trouble breathing. I guess three pounds of shrimp was too much in amongst everything else, huh?
Gasp..
Well, since I'm in a full mood...here we go. Hold your noses:
=======================
Goat of LaCarcinogenas
A ruminant, alone
Plods through the parched land
Where tire fires burn
The air is tinged with defoliant
And layered with McDonald’s
Wrappers and bags
The birds don’t sing and
The katydids just katydon’t
Anymore
It was the three-bean salad
And the Mini-Wheat apertif
That made me volitile
But it was the three
Quarter pounders with cheese
That provided the fuel
For that long, silent burn
That makes the earth stand still
That made the land of LaCarcinogenas
What it is
Should I have said
“Excuse me”
Or “Whups”
Or dared the children to pull my finger
No
It is better to have eaten and farted
Than to have not eaten at all
===========================
No, I didn't go to McDonald's, but I remember the intenstinal discomfort of it well. It haunts me when I pass a Mickey D's to this day...brr...
Well, I shall go. Hugs and manly hanshakes to all...who gets what is up to ya'll. | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/3/2004 8:23:40 PM | Enjoyed it ain't half of it, Holly. It ain't enjoying me now...urp...
Better get some candles lit here...hmm...does Garden Spice mix well with Fecal Breeze? We're gonna find out.
Good to see you too. Don't get too close. Your hair might fall out. | |
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| Re: GoatSmell's Own Poetry Thread
Posted: 9/3/2004 8:35:30 PM | I think I'm considering nut, corn and chiten crunch about now.
Ocean mist...? Hmm...I think I had that when I was in Skagway. It smelled of crude oil and arse. Bleah.
Well, anything's better than Colonic Blast.
I'm -uh- not disgusting anyone? Ah, good. | |
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