| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/14/2008 9:21:26 PM | Vroom Vroom
Beep Beep
the sound of four cylinders
is sweet to the ear
and by the way
can you hear the gears
automatically shifting?
No?
well lets go
round the block again
listen carefully
or I'll do it again
and again
and again
and again
and again
and again
  | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/15/2008 7:56:24 PM | Howdy all. Still here and still running with Breathing.
The car is here! Many thanks for the congrats. The thing is smarter than we are, as it refused to start one Sunday morning. A quick tow and a fiddle with the gear shift brought it back to life.
The techs said it was some "safety feature" due to it being "somehow between gears".
It hasn't happened again, so I guess we won't be taking it back. After all, we have yet to make a payment on it.
The poetry has stalled, though. I think it's all the running, or maybe I'm in storage mode now and building up an inventory of stuff to write about? Dunno. I lost the writing bug lately and I hope to get it back soon.
Hello to Om and Pickles...youse good peoples. Vroom, vroom, beep, beep...on three cylinders. Can that thing haul ass when you tell it to.
Alright to the showers and then to bed. We run at six in the morning now...ick.
G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/20/2008 6:00:53 PM | There's no business like Show business
Spent the whole weekend
nary a Pinot Grigio in sight
rehearsing to make sure
first night was just right.
Will fill ya in laters eh
howdy to K & S...... | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/23/2008 7:37:33 PM | Howdy Pickles!
Please...fill us in on the details. We gots ta know.
Been a while since I had a haiku...let's lift the lid and see what's there...
=================================
It is all gravy
At the Thunder Thigh Buffet
Where the big'uns graze
==================================
And they make 'em big in Saskabush. Lordy, lordy are they big.
Okay...to sleep! See yer later, eh? | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/23/2008 7:38:35 PM | vroom vroom...meep-meep...;-)
Management and their will-knots
Have me over a barrel
Insisting I can’t
blow myself off
For fear of
an embolism
up my ferrule
grrrr, Institutions...:-/ | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/23/2008 7:42:11 PM | Institutions
with their rule pollutions
create mass non-solutions
with word dilutions. | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:00:29 PM | Oh my...this barn fell to page 6. I have been a neglectful host, haven't I?
Good to see Om and Ravincause here in the barn. I hope you guys are doing well and I sure hope Om has concluded his battle with the raging institutional machine. If not, I wish you the best of luck.
Well, I think I stayed away from poetry for pretty much a month. I think the poetry well is re-filling.
Funny, ennit? You work the days away and try to physically and mentally better yourself in the scant off-hours and yet you still forget to balance it all. What am I saying "you" when I really mean "I". I forgot my balance point. I forgot my center.
I forgot about poetry.
It took a board meeting and a doodle pad to bring me back to life. Bless those dry-as-a-popcorn-fart meetings. Here's something from the well:
===================================
Doodle Pad, Doodle Pad...Hear My Scribbles
O dear -- what the hey?
It turned out to be a cross-threaded day
We strained ourselves into a bind
It took us five hours to start to unwind
When the shouting was over and done
Guiltily we realized that it was fun
=======================================
It ain't much, but its all I have for now. I think May is the month for restarting the poetry. Seems like a good time to do it.
Lets get some air into this old barn, eh?
See yer tomorrow. G'night. | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/1/2008 7:51:38 PM | Evenin'.
Poem? I have something that tried to be a poem, but it ended up being some kind of blather semi-structured into a Hallmark question.
For better or worse...here it is:
=================================
Better Than A Nose Picking
What can one think
When one sees a
Payroll clerk
Rubbing his nipple
Like a worry stone?
Is this a habit
Developed in
Cubicle isolation?
Or is does it
Comfort him as
The fiscal year
Closes
C-L-O-S-E-S
Like a stubborn zipper
Concealing the
Dangling, rangling
Hairy genitalia
Of taxes gone by?
=======================================
There we be. Everything zips up and turns like the seasons...turns, turns (rub, rub) turns.
See yer tomorrow, eh?
G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/1/2008 9:58:03 PM | omsnot visitin' in the barn
spin us another yarn
come tell us a story, write us a poem
I'm sleepless and oh, so far from home
so I came for a visit in the barnyard tonight
looks like someone had left on a light
Spring has it's promise, and it's May now I know
but damned if I didn't drive through more snow
It's cold up here in the farther Northland
and I do, well, I sort of do, understand
I must be patient for spring to come
as I warm my hands here, a little numb
nice fire here, goatsmell has going
silly old sermons we've all been enjoying
would like just one more story alright
then I'll pack it in and wish all a goodnight. | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/2/2008 8:21:44 PM | Howdy ya'll. Just comin' on back tonight to see how yer doing.
Good to see Om here today. The humus is on the table next to the stout. It feels about proper to be in the barn again and it's good to be back.
Hello to Ravincause. Lovely little ditty you gave us here. I think there's a little goatshit in that fire, so I apologize for the smell. Best to not breathe too deeply near it. Black lung, you see.
Tomorrow Breathing and I continue to train for the marathon and our longest training run of 33 km is tomorrow. My mind boggles when I think of it. 33 km. I thought that was a really good bike ride before now...running that distance will be something to experience.
That experience will begin at 8:00 am tomorrow.
So, before an early bedtime, a haiku will suffice:
============================================
One foot then one more
Slapping on the asphalt trail
I left breakfast there
=============================================
Yep, that's all I have. I'll see yer tomorrow for a bit. We'll see how the mind works after all that running and (of course) the beer afterwards.
G'night, eh? | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/3/2008 7:30:48 PM | Tired. I reckon running 33 km and guzzling a few beers will do that.
Howzabout a haiku today?
================================
Footsore and weary
We did clock in a good pace
By, my, do we ache
================================
Bed soon. See yer tomorrow, eh? G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/4/2008 4:47:24 PM | Been a while since the last Sunday Sermon from the Book of Goat, huh?
Better get to it, then....
=========================================
Psalm 491 – The Book of Goat
Evenin’
Thy Lard sayeth
After a long absence
The church was just resting
As winter tried to pass on
Relenting to spring
(Reluctantly)
With the birth of warm weather
And the rejuvenation of summer bugs
Thy Lard cometh again
For He is in a Better Mood
Because He was tired
Of running in the snow and ice
But that’s a minor gripe
Hello all
What can be the sermon today?
Thy Lard asketh as He places his
Beer down on the table
Imbalance, He thinketh
There’s a good topic
Running is about states of
Controlled imbalance
As the center of gravity is placed
Over
The feet, causing them
To move forward to compensate
Simple, eh?
It is, though it gets hard to think of it that way
When thee art placing those feet down
Ninety times a minute
But, Thy Lard thinketh
Life is a bit like that
To journey, to move “forward”
(whichever direction that may be)
Or “backward”
(don’t get Thy Lard started on that, either)
You must put yourself in a state of imbalance
So you can rebalance at a different perspective
In that lies Growth
Enlightenment
Wisdom
Understanding
Compassion
If the process contained fibre
Then this would be recommended
By the Canada Food Guide
As an excellent source
Of the stuff of life
Amen
====================================
Okay...there we are. The beer waits for me. Breathing and I are still recovering from 33km of madness yesterday. We're healing with the help of beer. Precious, precious beer.
Later, eh? | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:13:09 PM | Hope feet are recovering well
You can keep that brown stinky stuff though
Now THATS the stuff of imbalance! 
=============
uncomfortable
comfort zones
can also be addictive
=============
I'm getting old
Running days are long gone
But good onya!  | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/5/2008 8:50:14 PM | Howdy all.
Howdy to Salty! The feet are doing well tonight and they healed up with beer and rest. Breathing and I are ready to run again this Wednesday. Gotta keep up that training...the marathon is only a few weeks away.
Your running days aren't past you. Heck, there are 80 year olds out there out running us. As long as you have a heartbeat and a pair of functioning legs, you can run.
Go ahead and argue it.
Say...while we're waiting for the inevitable arguments, let's have a poem:
====================================
Tag It, Bag It, Gag It
I often wonder what a co-worker
Wants to say
When, during his morning shower
He said he gagged the time away
I’m not sure if it’s a simple thing
A quirk, a reflex
From living over 40 years
Without having sex
He lathered himself, dry heaved
Fended away formless wraiths
He has the comfort of his religion
Though he’s bereft of faith
=========================================
The human mind is a mystery to me. That and the capacity that some people have for self-abuse. Stunning.
Heh...he says as he cleans his running shoes...
Self abuse and self improvement are two sides of the same coin, ah reckon. But I'll stick with running instead of what the co-workers are doing.
Well, see yer tomorrow. G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/5/2008 9:37:54 PM | Well........... dang me dang me dang me
da Goat is back and so am I...LA on a budget...$270 return from Buffalo...
Hell it costs me more in beer money to stay home....
LA's fine at times
appears to be quite normal
except Hollywood
Hallooooooo Barnacles | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/5/2008 11:03:54 PM |
Your running days aren't past you. Heck, there are 80 year olds out there out running us. As long as you have a heartbeat and a pair of functioning legs, you can run.
Go ahead and argue it.
Has been said I dont have a heart ;)
Who am I to argue...
[on a more serious note...major heart attack 8 years ago slowed me up by about 30%]
well it was 99.5% at the time, but I can do 'normal' stuff now
that run aint in the normal range for me :)
==============
beer in Buffalo
creates imbalanced stampedes
LA rogue rages?
==============
[glad you had a good time Pickles] | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/6/2008 7:07:12 PM | Botox rules
red carppet rictus
expressionless smiles
that don't reach the eyes
female fools who think
time can be thwarted
features distorted
by a few ccs
of liquid poison
death by Botox....
not as quick as Botulism
but just as deadly
 | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/6/2008 7:20:55 PM | ^^ pretty much goes for any artifical cr@p we shove into our bodies
===============
botox barn beckons
benefitting brow beaten
beleauguered beauties
===============
How the h*ll do you spell beleauguered? | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/6/2008 8:00:41 PM | Evenin' all.
Hello to Salty and Pickles....good to see you both in the barn tonight.
Salty -- I've seen/heard/read about a lot of people nearly felled by heart attacks, strokes and cancer coming back to run marathons. Even I am coming back from a physical setback that's eight years in the past now. Nothing is beyond human achievement -- heartbeats are not the same as hearts. Beleaguered? Is that how you spell it? I could run it through the spell checker, but nar...
Pickles -- when I hear "botox" I think of Elvis' daughter and her plasti-face. Man, whoever said botox makes a face beautiful was straight-up lying.
Alrighty...time fer a crappy poem-like thing:
=======================================
Rite of Summer
Summer students have arrived
So keen to do the dirty jobs
No one else wants to do
The storage trailers wait in silence
For their yearly visitors
To rearrange the stale paper
Sweep the mouse turds away
They work so cheaply, these good kids
They smile a lot and seem to be pleased
Probably
Because they don’t have to work
With fast food royalty
Burger King
And Dairy Queen
Some experiences are more preferable
Than others
They will take the well-earned
Scant dollars they saved
Back to school
Blow it all on beer
Study hard
Stay in school
Some day, all this can be yours
==============================================
Alrighty...to sleep. See yer tomorrow, eh?
G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/7/2008 6:59:40 PM | Hey, hey. Let's have a poem....or whatever the hell it is:
=========================================
Lunch? I like Lunch!!
Words flopped and gasped
We struggled for the interesting bits
In vain
Until someone brought up a tale of
The Baconator
They said they could never be hungry enough
To eat one of those
How can one stare six strips of bacon
Square in the crispy fat
And not feel De Honger?
Not just hunger
But in the best fake-Spanish voice
Like the best of the worst Zorro movies
Scream it out like your tights are binding
In the crotch
Your leather boots pinching your toes
Into angry points
Holler from the hollow of the belly
Half standing in desperation
The other half in the anger that comes
From losing your wallet when you just had
The $#^%& thing
Slap those two halves together
And feel
DE HONGER!!!
Because, dammit
You are soooo hongry
And smoked pork on a burger
Of ventricle-bursting proportions
Awaits you
Feed the beast
Feed De Honger
===========================================
Wendy's is open late for those that can't wait until the daylight hours. Feed your Honger.
Slurp.
G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/7/2008 8:05:04 PM | ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I just forwarded the above to the Heart and Stroke Foundation so they can use it in a promo.........'K?
Flub Dub
Lard in a tub
plaque formation
vessel occlusion
bypass brings temporary
coronary perfusion
stroke brings days
filled with confusion
streptokinase
a temporary solution | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/8/2008 8:13:34 PM | Hello all.
Another fine evening in Toon Town. And another fine evening in the barn. It's airing out quite nicely now.
Hello Pickles! Oh, that Baconator...they are tasty, but I certainly wouldn't make a habit out of eating those. They aren't what you call "running fuel". I think I'd hurling that up after 3 km went by. I'd pity the poor soul's car that would be covered in half-digested beef n' bacon.
Say...that could be a new Campbell's soup. Creamy Beef n' Bacon. Urp. Bleah.
Okay...to the nightly poem. Inspired by true events and conflicting egos:
==========================================
Hold Fast Till I Come, If You Know What I Mean
Corporate Jesus strode into the office
Understanding so much
In so little time
He didn’t walk on water
He floated over policy
Like it didn’t matter
As if only the will of His attention
Could bring things into being
When done
They were gone
Corporate Jesus did not wear sandals
He wore comfortable Italian shoes
Well-worn, but with a well-maintained sense
Of foot-borne presence
With good arch-support for high stepping
That pesky policy stuff
Corporate Jesus leased a Mustang
For only one week
Dallied with a Ford F-350
Then settled on an Acura
It’s
Jet black with tinted windows
He sits in there during His scant time off
Feels the leather seats
Savours the A/C
Considers His shoes
===============================================
Again, structureless and not really a poem. I love and I'll keep it just the same.
And there we have it. Back to the evening's events. Which is a big ol' fat sleep for this lardy arse.
G'night! | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/8/2008 9:30:53 PM | Jaysus! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jesus had a pick up??????????????
DJa think he wants ta sell it???? Am in the market...
I don wanna Porshe or a Beemer
an Audi or a Jag
I wanna pickup truck
that kin do the job
I wanna F 150
or a GMC
that'll take me to the dump...
to dump..carefree
I wanna pickup truck
and a red bandana
I wanna be a redneck...
I wanna wanna wanna
yup.....got a load an I need to unload...... | |
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| A Barn By Any Other Name...
Posted: 5/9/2008 3:12:14 AM | It's May already,
Long have I waited to see
if love finds a way
Distant, howling wolf
A lonely soul seeking love
The trail grows cold
 | |
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