| Too Picky
Posted: 8/29/2009 11:49:44 PM | I will be completely Blunt and Honest with you, because that's just the way I am...
YOU SOUND LIKE A REAL SNOB. If your criteria for a man that you can fall in love with, someone that will treat you right and make you happy is based on His Level of Education.. And He Must Have A PHD? Then Good Luck to you. It Sounds like you have No Concept of Romance or Chemistry. You don't have to settle for a High School Drop Out, but what if your best candidate for a Soul-Mate is a college drop out and you pass him by like he's some kind of a loser? Maybe he is so intelligent that he was bored to death in college because it was just too easy and he had to restrain himself from correcting his professors when they made mistakes in their lectures. Or got into debates with these PHD snobs who were trying to teach him but were so narrow minded and stuck on out dated information that it pissed him off and he had to embarrass his own professors in the middle of class. Feeling like you are smarter than your own teachers makes school really annoying. I may not have a PHD, but I can discuss everything from physics, quantum mechanics and string theory to cosmology, history, chemistry, pharmacology, biology, literature or the latest technology in live streaming interactive Flash Media that is about to revolutionize business, the medical field, and the Internet. I am going to jump on this opportunity with my partner who already has a computer business installing software and setting up networks, we will be making millions within two years as a hosting service and setting up the hardware and software for 15 grand a job minimum. So you can take that PHD And Shove It!! If You think you are too damn good for the average Joe or the entrepreneur. That is just sad. Do you believe in God? What about Fate? Love at first site? Do you even know what True Love is? It is unconditional.  | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/30/2009 12:03:00 AM | | ABSOLUTELY!! Without Chemistry, Love has no chance. If you are so picky that you give up on someone because they don't meet one of the criteria on you "List" then you will never find true love. There is no such thing as "Mr. or Ms. Perfect" none of us are perfect. If there is Chemistry right away then throw all of your rules out the window and Go For It! Life is too short to pass up any opportunity for Love. Sometimes you may get hurt, but you have to get back out there and try again. Whenever there are sparks, turn it into a blazing fire of passion! | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/30/2009 6:46:35 AM | | Most women I know who are my age who are single and looking to date and/or dating are not half as picky about things as many men seem to be. I am attracted to so many different appearances as far as men are concerned, and my mind just cannot grasp the fact that a 50 year old average looking man seems to think most women his age are unattractive, as they look their age and do not have the tall, thin body and long blonde hair of a younger woman. When I was younger I was never told that I was too short, my face was not pretty enough, my body shape was wrong, and I was too educated for men who were my age or older. What's with the middle aged men and their requirements? | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/30/2009 5:59:44 PM | | I agree, there is no such thing as a "perfect" man, just as there is no "perfect" woman. Call me naive, but relationships/friendships need time to mature . I have yet to be hit by "chemistry", I prefer a long simmering slow burn.... Or is that "chemistry" just another word for horny and want to get laid that night??? | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/30/2009 6:03:49 PM | | Works the same for men...one guy had a specific size she had to be....what kind of woman would respond to that???? | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/30/2009 6:44:21 PM | | They must be way, way picky with me here in Michigan, I cannot get one response to an email I send, and I actually read profiles and send good emails, not lame sex ones or generic one line emails....... | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/30/2009 10:55:16 PM |  I don't think anyone truly knows themselves that well, to say I'm looking for all these certain qaulities in a potential mate. With most men, you probably will struggle to find mutual satisfaction without some form of intimacy first. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/31/2009 12:29:37 PM |
Women have to accept that REAL LIFE men aren't like the ones in romance novels and on TV/Movies. They won't come riding in on a white horse with their armour shining... more often than not, they will be driving a honda, in a polo shirt and jeans.
I agree 100%. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/31/2009 2:41:55 PM | | We accept that men are not wearing shining armor and riding on white horses.When are men going to accept that real life women are not model gorgeous, needy women who do not have opinions or ambition? | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 8/31/2009 5:30:43 PM | what is chemistry?looks, lust and body
i personally believe the character of the person is 80%...looks and body...i tell you why
the body and looks will fade
not the personality and the values and morals...if somebody is overweight...you can help them lose weight
if they are mean and have no personaltiy
you can not change them | |
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DanM76
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Joined: 6/25/2009
Msg: 286 | |
| Too Picky
Posted: 9/1/2009 7:27:14 AM | | I think the key word is "too" picky. It is ok to be picky, but to be too picky means you'll lose out on a quality person. So don't complain when you're still single looking for perfection at a later age. Everyone has flaws. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 9/1/2009 7:40:37 AM | "the body and looks will fade"
Sorry, People ONLY say that when they want somebody else to compromise... | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 9/5/2009 1:58:29 PM | the guy was talking about how he thinks people are too picky about what they want in someone.
Translated: I want to bed you down tonight - please lower your standards. If you have to get drunk I will pay for it. Etc. Etc.
Tip: If you ever feel like you are being manipulated, you are being manipulated.
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| Too Picky
Posted: 9/6/2009 2:46:10 PM | The real problem with being picky is that it ruins potentially successful relationships from ever taking place. How many people find themselves surrounded by others they have nothing in common with when there real match is stuck with a partner who only wanted them for there looks.
Many will except a partner on the basis of one super desire than work at changing the person to suit their other needs. People who care more about looks, money or an education are shallow and don’t deserve what they want. The person who uses these qualities to attract someone are just as bad. It’s like they know there’s nothing more to them.
It’s one big vicious circle and it shows more than ever. And for that matter, what exactly is a perfect match anyway. I see it as the more you try to change someone, the farther apart you become. Happiness dissolves rather quick when you see yourself being transformed into someone you’re not. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/19/2009 11:33:27 AM | Picky is as picky does.
I dont even fish here anymore. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/20/2009 1:45:06 PM | It is possible to be too picky. There is no settling down without some settling for. If you're waiting for "the one," forget. No such person exists. Every relationship involves compromises.
That said, be leary if guys who you happen to be dating tell you you're "too picky." What they mean is, "have sex with me." If you don't want to, don't. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/20/2009 5:27:15 PM | | Everyone should be as "picky" as they want to be...i hear all the time about all the great people one"misses out " on by being "picky" or "too picky"..I hate Liver...always have and always will...if someone says hey you're missing out some realy great Liver over here i will thank them for warning me..you cannot miss out on anything or anyone you never wanted in the first place.I will live my life hating and avoiding Liver and will gladly accept,pay and live with any consequences that it may bring. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/21/2009 12:51:23 PM |
So my question is, is holding out for chemistry the wrong thing to do?
If you mean chemistry as in fireworks - yes it’s a mistake. If you mean chemistry as in compatibility - no, that’s a requisite. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/21/2009 1:58:33 PM | I was given some advice that I will pass along. Not sure if it directly answers the question but here it is:
Make a list of all the things you want in a mate. Give it some real thought. Not just superficial things (although those things should be included), but real character qualities also. Make the list. Add to it. Delete from it, until you're sure you have a good complete comprehensive list of all the things you want.
Then ask yourself: "Do I have all of these attributes?" I didn't.
Throw that list away. It's worthless when it comes to finding a mate. Keep it if you'd like to use it as a self improvement tool.
Then make another list. This is the list of deal-breakers. These are things that you just simply cannot tolerate. I'm not talking about leaving the toilet seat up or snoring. I'm talking about things like racism, drug abuse, intolerance, apathy etc....
The second list is the one that matters. You see, we all want way more than we can give. In the end, we must compromise on what we want or we'll die alone. Unless you're Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie. The rest of us must compromise. Now that you have the second list, you must be honest. When you're dating a new person and they ding the deal-breaker list, you must be true to yourself and quit seeing them no matter how cute/beautiful he/she is. It's tough and I'd be lying if I said I was able to follow the advice perfectly. But it's a good way to make sure I'm not fooling myself about who I'm with.
Just my two cents. Use it or don't. Good luck to you. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/21/2009 2:42:25 PM | | I think you can be to picky, since being on this site I have been chating to guys that to be honest with you had I been in a club/pub etc I probably wouldnt of looked twice at harsh I know but thats the way it is. What Im saying is I found myself really liking them because Ive actually taken the time to chat so next time Im out I won't discount anyone. You may or may not agree with me but opened my eyes a bit. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/22/2009 5:41:13 AM | To start with women in general get 5 to 10 times the email that men do on here. In my opinion any woman on here for over 1 year who is looking for long term, and is STILL on here is too picky. I feel sure any guy on here a year that has received 100's of emails would be in a relationship by now.
Typically, the majority of women that email me are just not my type in the attraction department. I'm assuming that's generally true for most on here, and of course only about 1 out of 9 or so that i am attracted to return my emails. Then again i may only get 3 or 4 emails a week, unlike most women on here. Maybe all of our standards are too high, but if i was getting 20+ emails a week i'm sure i could find someone i like | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/22/2009 11:24:10 AM | Yeah I think I was on this site like 3 weeks and I was not being picky, just wanted friendship first, so off the line now, got caught. So a year> oh heck yeah, you aren't being realistic with yourself and with your choices. Stop taking life so serious, and instead of reading off a checklist go out and have FUN! | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/22/2009 11:27:35 AM | And on that same note, I have a 27 year old PICKY prissy sister who has not dated much in over 7 years, she still recycles her ex bfs, because she refuses to online date, speed date, etc.. She thinks she will bump into prince charming who has been searching for her all along. I got tired of trying to set her up with someone because she always can shoot them down before the first date. Shes upset I already married, divorced, had kids and date. Helloooo things wont happen unless you make them happen. They dont just fall into your lap, thats a fallacy the media puts into your head. Wake up already.  | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/22/2009 11:49:47 AM | | Alot of women on here want their arm candy.. I don't consider myself bad looking, but I do have an interior and alot of women won't give that a chance... If you think you're so hot and deserve a guy just as hot.. Then why are you looking for a guy here. | |
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| Too Picky
Posted: 10/22/2009 12:19:44 PM | My best friend told me the other day that the man I am with is definitely a keeper as he brings me coffee in bed. I however believe he is a keeper for so many other reasons including the chemistry 
I am very thankful that I was picky and didn't settle for someone who didn't thrill me but waded my way through to the one that I enjoy so thoroughly. | |
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