| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 11:45:28 AM | | I am truely sorry if I got anyone upset I was just trying to make a point of men just not responding which is very rude and disrespectful. I shouldn't have said I was leaving the site because I probably won't. I am looking for some new ideas and suggestions for improving my chances. I am glad that some have met people on here to chat with i would love to meet new friends also but getting them to respond is the problem. I want to thank everyone who gave me some tips and I will do changing and see where it leads me. I don't think that the world is so cruel I enjoy my life and have alot ot be thankful for but would like someone to share it with. I don't dislike anything about life I have alot of good friends and family I was just trying to get apoint across but went about it in the wrong way sorry. I enjoyed all the feed back I got Thank you | |
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| POF should screen better?????
Posted: 9/5/2008 11:55:51 AM | Karl: I let my politeness come through in my writing and my daily actions, its in my profile because so many mention how rude and anti-social the men are, and I'm saying from the start I don't have that issue.
I put that picture up because that is how I look on an average day, because I don't put up a front. And I am sort of anti-military, so the marine cut is not going to happen. I will shave for a fresh picture in a sport shirt, or some other of the few nice pieces I have.
As for my profile: honest, to the point, not negative. Really it is my favorite one so far, but if you have a suggestion, I might get something from the input. | |
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| POF should screen better?????
Posted: 9/5/2008 12:14:13 PM | I KNOW you are a nice guy. But you have to seperate real life from internet profiles a little bit. I don't think you should lie, but you should give the ladies what they want.
Saying you are a nice guy directly seems to have the opposite effect on the reader. I think it is something women would rather read "between the lines". Say it without saying it.
The picture to you is the average you. TO YOU! To a woman, it is a portal into a fantasy. Because of that, it should be the BEST you. Thats why I recommended a hair cut and a sport coat (this is NOT what I would recommend for everyone, but would be a long post on its own on how to choose your picture "look"). I stick by the original suggestion. Its a haircut, not a lifestyle or a political statement. For the coat, go to a thrift store like u said u go to. My favorite spoartcoat came from a Goodwill for $4. Western cut and stitched, fits like it was tailored for me and appeared brand new!
Last, NEVER EVER again say out here u are anti-military. Right there you just lost tons of potential dates. If it comes up privately with a woman, rephrase to something like "I am disappointed in the current administration's policy regarding the military". | |
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/5/2008 1:15:14 PM | absolute waste, not just for you im not old, ugly, fat or else yes i have faults, but one of the biggest is to waste my time on here, just aint happenin good luck  | |
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/5/2008 1:16:14 PM | absolute waste, not just for you im not old, ugly, fat or else yes i have faults, but one of the biggest is to waste my time on here, just aint happenin good luck  | |
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/5/2008 1:36:21 PM | Marine cut? I just can't. I can find a blazer, I suppose, tweed with arm patches, glasses and a pipe; that's the real me.
I'm sorry, I'm not exactly anti-military, more like anti-war and anti-Bush/Republicans.
If that loses me dates, I don't think we would have got along to well anyway. | |
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/5/2008 1:57:30 PM | | I can see the advantages and usefulness of sites like this one, when people live in big cities where they can literally have 100's of potential dates to choose from within say 20 mins of where they live.Obviously in "real life" they wouldn't get a chance to discover all these people but here they can potentially chat with someone one night and then agree to meet up for a quick coffee the next and then if theres no attraction, then they can move on to the next one.BUT this site (and others) are a complete waste of time if you live in the middle of nowhere and there are literally just a handful of people who live within say 25 miles who even meet you very basic requirements i.e. age, non-smoker.Once you've looked a bit deeper and ruled out those who aren't a match for one reason or another, you're left with about 3 potential matches, and once you've messaged them and had the normal "no response", then what do you do?!!! (i've tried distance and ultimately, that didn't work purely because of the 340 mile round trip involved).It really annoys me those people who go on about not being able to find a match even though they go on new "first dates" every week!!!...I've had 2 first dates on the last 2 1/2 years...so what hope do I have?!!!...the best thing about this site is the forums and I've had some fun on them..but ultimately, thats not what I came here for.... | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:02:59 PM | | hot momma 47, I am not trying to be a jerk or anything but i have to ask a question. You have been here since 2006. Two years give or take a little. In that time you have never met anyone that you click with at all? | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:11:39 PM | Matt,
Get out of your head and into hers! And realize you will need to put in some effort and play the game.
Here is a revised profile based on your original...
I am often described as smart, funny, dependable and as cool as a sea breeze ;) While I make a great living, I often find myself doing more with less. I love shopping at thrift stores for clothes as I find some remarkable styles you just can't find at a conventional store. My car is a car, basic transportation, not a public statement of my manhood (93 Civic). I don't aspire to flaunt wealth, rather I see it as a way to provide the best for my family and loved ones, including the one who will be my true and lasting love.
One of my favorite ways to keep fit is playing tennis. Do you like tennis? Wanna be my friend and practice partner? Its OK if not, I have varied interests and we are bound to have lots in common.
My family business is retail. It really suits my personality as I am outgoing and friendly and enjoy people. Being polite, mannered and considerate of others goes a long way in my profession. You could say I care deeply about my own personal character.
I have my Bachelors degree in English. Makes sense since I love literature, art, art museums and history. I own a duplex (and happily mortgage free and have zero debt) and prefer Japanese cars. I cook well and clean my own messes (rare in a single, untamed male).
I also enjoy camping or maybe having a beer at he Guadalupe. I like to go to the Impressionist exhibit at the Kimball and discuss art history. I like to travel a lot to such places as Mexico, the Guadalupe, Houston, Galveston and Colorado (I enjoy skiing). I even make it overseas on occassion. I enjoy when I get to dress in my best suit and attend friends' weddings (gives me hope).
I like to dance and I enjoy 80's music like the Smiths, the Cure, or Depeche Mode. For modern music I like System of a Down, Tool, and RHCP.
If any of this sounds good to you, don't be afraid to write and strike up a conversation! Honesty, consideration and similar interests are all I am looking for. Have a great day and good luck in your search. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:15:41 PM | Karl, could you and Matt take it to private mail please...?
--Ms. Flis | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:18:48 PM | | After 3 years I finally met a nice guy, very good looking, going to see where it goes. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:21:26 PM | | No. Its relevant to the topic. And more than one person has expressed questions surrounding this area. My advice to you would be to not read what you are not interested in. Its easier to censor yourself by skipping my posts than it would be for me to message everyone interested. Oh, yeah, thats what forums are for! | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:22:16 PM | | Hey, good luck hereandnow68, I hope your patience has finally paid dividends.I'm always pleased for people who have been waiting a while when they find a match, its the ones who come in here for 5 mins and suddenly are head over heels in love that annoy me!! LOL BUT at the end of the day, its only jealousy on my sad part. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 2:56:36 PM | I was thinking about how to describe writing a profile....
Its not a want ad, its a romantic poem
Its not a newspaper sticle, its a love letter
Its not a Self-Help book, its a romance novel
Make sense? | |
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/5/2008 3:29:12 PM | Hey Mikixox,
I have paid for dating sites and there are more scammers there than on here. This site isn't doing much for me either but my daughter met a man here and they're getting along great. They're getting married soon and they're quite happy together. If it can happen once, it can happen again. I'm a die hard and won't throw in the towel...at least not yet. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 3:39:33 PM | I was thinking about how to describe writing a profile....
Its not a want ad, its a romantic poem
Its not a newspaper sticle, its a love letter
Its not a Self-Help book, its a romance novel
Make sense?
Karl
you are a smart fella, some need to pay attention to what you have said: | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/5/2008 9:43:27 PM | | I can't get anyone to e-mail me back when I think that I found a match that was what I was trying to get across. Of I am not on here 24 7 either so that might be a problem. Just about every guy I e-mailed as not responed one way or the other. Yes ifeel there are serval that have the same interests as me but really haven't had anyone that really clicked with so to speak. I did meet one guy on here and that was it. I know that distance can be a problem but at least take the chance to get to know me then make your decision. It is ok like I said before I like my life and have alot to be thankful for but would just like someone to share it. I am not giving up I know that he is out there somewhere just have to be patient and leave it up to my higher power. Live my life from day to day and let it fall into place. I don't think you was being a jerk for asking the question and thank you for asking but the answer is no i haven't met anyone that I click with because I really haven't chatted with too many of pof singles's. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/6/2008 12:02:18 AM | hot momma 47, I guess i am about to piss off some folks here with what i am about to say. But if it does then it just does. I am not saying this is you. Not pointing any fingers at any one certain person. I have been here for a while now. Been here twice as a matter of fact. The first time was a learning experience. The second time i was only here a month and i met a sweet lady that i am still seeing. Because i figured out something. I was being to picky. That is the problem with people on this site right now. There to damn picky. There looking for the wrong things and most of the time in the wrong order. They want to go by a picture first and decide if there interested or not. It doesn't matter the person you are within. They think they have to be sexually attracted right off the bat. When they look at a picture, if it doesn't get "wet" or "jump to attention" then there not interested. It doesn't matter if your a warm hearted, good soul of a person. They want to look at a picture and be instantly attracted. That is why there is not many people who really get together on this site. That is why it is so hard to get someone to answer you be you a man or a woman. To many people are looking for the wrong things in the wrong order. What they should be doing is giving a person a chance to show them who they are and what they are and finding something within that person to be attracted to. Instead, They look at a picture and blindly decide from there when a picture tells you nothing about the person. There is way to much shallow on here. But, At the same time you can't give up. You never know, Right over in the middle of all this shallowness could be the best thing that ever happened to you.  | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/6/2008 4:24:30 AM | | Great post Eddie, and one I wholeheartedly agree with.Its just a shame that most in here, won't :( | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/6/2008 9:59:11 AM | re, post252
Thank you. I know. I have been here for a while. People don't like it when someone shoves the truth under there nose. People want to be stroked and told there right. Even when down inside they know there wrong. | |
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/6/2008 10:50:48 AM | Karmicgrace.
Some folks are just rude. Don't it take personal, its just bad manners.
Kalifornina's as you know are the nicest folks in the Universe. But we can't all live in Kali. Besides your a very attractive woman and Im sure your lovely and easy to get along with.
What do you do over there in Cambria? Ive been to the Hurst Castle about 3 times.
Cambria is beautiful. I lived in Santa Cruz Ca for 10 years. All together in Ca for 90%
of my life. Its really strange dealing with people outside of the PRC.
Most can't understand a thing that I say. I just get a blank stare, like in .......wad ya say?
Life isn't personal, nature is completely neutral.
Texas is nuts.........bible thumpers as far as the eye can see. I get out in 1 more month
can't hardly wait. Then its back home to the PRC for me.
Bubba | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/6/2008 11:29:28 AM | Karl: Can I cut and paste that? It is what I wrote, and I think I'm pretty smart, but I like your version better.
Thanks for being supportive, like the women do on here, and acting like a friend, and taking the time to write something so specific. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/6/2008 2:27:28 PM | Matt,
Sure, feel free to use it. I think it will help a bit.
You are into literature. Think more dreamy stuff when it comes to dating. In fact, I would go to Walmart and by a woman's romance novel. Read it. Its insight into how the fairer sex works. My guess is you would get good at it in very short order with your background.
I would especially recommend the hardcore sex-driven guys out here read a romance novel. You will learn from the sex scenes how graphical descriptions and pictures are NOT used. If you want willing sex partners, best you learn what they want in an encounter! Want a cheap free way to see some of this, try this: http://www.sextails.com/sex-stories/publish/torn-in-two.shtml
Note the attention to atmosphere, thoughts, desire, etc., not to graphical nasty content us guys go for.
Eddie,
You are so right. BUT, the forums reach so few to waken them up. Hence why I recommend playing the game, starting right with the picture on the profile. It works for guys looking soley for sex and will still work for those looking for something serious. | |
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| Cruel World?
Posted: 9/6/2008 2:34:18 PM | I want to add a bit on pictures. Guys, never more than 2. NEVER! One nice profile pic is usually sufficient. However, a second shot to accentuate a great trait IN AN INDIRECT WAY can help. If you have nice biceps, for instance, don't put up a shirtless flexing pic (u guys have no clue). Instead, maybe "curl" a kitten up to your face for a snuggle so it shows your biceps, but not as the main focus ;) Oh, you'll get messages!
Yes, later u can use that shirtless pic. If you have that body, I recommend you actually have one. KEEP IT OUT OF PUBLIC VIEW THOUGH. You can then pull of a "just for you" kinda thing that steers you a bit toward more sexual thoughts w/o going overboard with a "GODDAM PENIS PICTURE".
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| This site did nothing for me
Posted: 9/6/2008 8:34:58 PM | Same here. I posted looking for friends instead of the usual "let's have sex first, THEN maybe I'll get to know you." I couldn't have been more clear in my ad about what I'm looking for. I don't blame the site though. I've found this attitude on other sites, as well as offline. So many men I meet want to jump into something right away, whether it be sex or a relationship. I prefer to take things slow, but in today's hustle and hurry world, "slow" is apparently not an option. And really, do people who send "canned" emails think that the recipient doesn't realize it's nothing more than a cut-and-paste?
Oh well, I gave it a shot! | |
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