| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 5:13:38 PM | So - if the car wasn't licensed, if your friend would have said to you "ok, you can borrow it - but it isn't tagged. If you get caught, I can't help you." - that would have worked. But she didn't. Gimme a break. It would NEVER dawn on me to ask my friends if their cars are legal or not before I drove one around the block. Silly me.
But yeah - sounds like the cop was doing his job - not just filling a quota. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 7:22:03 PM |
Just my take on it, but I feel that your friend (owner of the vehicle) should reimburse you for the complete amount. YOU did nothing wrong. You weren't speeding, driving recklessly, drunk, wrong way on a one way, etc... The ticket came about from her actions.
I'd give serious thoughts about keeping her as a friend. How good a friend can she be if she's willing to screw you for the $100.oo she promised you?
I agree about your friend being very petty over this. If I didnt have the money I would find it or at least say let me pay half now and next month will pay for the rest.
I would contest it at court. Really worth a shot, except if you lose you will also have to pay the court fees. Yes you are responsible but then again it would never have occured to me to notice the tag. You trusted your friend to use her car, as she trusted you too.
But sometimes its best to be the better person. This doesnt mean you have to cut the friendship, but maybe just "untie" it and not yet cut it. You might start seeing what kind of a person she is to set her friend up like that and then not be responsible.
3 months to pay it is not bad. Maybe you could even ask for an extension. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 7:41:31 PM |
No, pay the bloody fine yourself.You are responsible for your own actions.
Having to pay a fine for something your friend did is being responsible for your friend's actions, not your own.
You are legally responsible to make sure that the car you borrrow is legal in every aspect
You're absolutely right. And I bet whenever you borrow somebody's care, you make sure to check for busted tail lights, displayed license plates, tire pressure, radiator... all before turning the car on, right?
I'm sure you do. 
OMG give yourself a pat on the back. You were the first one to notice this. The damn car wasn't registered.
You have no idea when this situation happened. It could have happened back in 2007 for all you know. Not to mention that you can go into part of the next year without changing your tags, legally, as long as you can provide proof that you have them and/or are going to mount them in the near future.
OP, something else is going on here. You first said the ticket was for the the tag being covered by the license plate holder.
Then you say...
I'm pretty sure it was a typo, don't be such a douchebag. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 8:02:41 PM | ^^^ "You have no idea when this situation happened. It could have happened back in 2007 for all you know. Not to mention that you can go into part of the next year without changing your tags, legally, as long as you can provide proof that you have them and/or are going to mount them in the near future."
Well, I'm guessing this was not the case, or she would have taken them to court with her to try to get it dismissed.
^^^ "OP, something else is going on here. You first said the ticket was for the the tag being covered by the license plate holder.
Then you say...
I'm pretty sure it was a typo, don't be such a douchebag."
Uhhh, tell me again Greyfeld what I'm being a "douchebag" about by pointing out the contradiction in the OP's posts? Or, what you feel is a typo. Just so I can be as enlightened as you appear to be.
~ds~ | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 8:29:23 PM | Yeah Greyfield, sometimes you make me wonder why you post. This time it ceratinly was not to reply to the OP.
You are legally responsible to make sure that the car you borrrow is legal in every aspect That's what I said and it's a fact so why do you say?:
And I bet whenever you borrow somebody's care, you make sure to check for busted tail lights, displayed license plates, tire pressure, radiator... all before turning the car on, right? Regardless of if I do or I don't. It's still a fact so why comment on that? Do you mean that IF I don't do it myself I cannot tell another person that it's the law? And why do you assume I do or don't do something? What on earth does that have to do with what the OP asked?
Personal responsibility is important. If you do something wrong you have to take the heat for it. OP obvoiusly doesn't want to and in addition she lays blame with the cops for doing their job. Checking current registrations is a valuable tool in finding people who have a warrant for their arrest or is out on the street doing things they shouldn't be doing. Many "bad" people have been apprehended and taken off the streets that way but maybe OP and others who object to that would rather people who are driving drunk, or are hing as kites to be allowed to keep on and maybe cause an accident and kill someone.
I wonder if OP would clap her hands if a person in her situation that was driving drunk and killed a dear one of hers would think it's okay if the cops didn't stop him. After all, the cops are Terriable and shouldn't stop drivers for such things...... | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 9:34:52 PM |
Well, I'm guessing this was not the case, or she would have taken them to court with her to try to get it dismissed.
Obviously you completely missed the point. She got the ticket because the tags were covered by the license plate frame, not because of expired tags.
Uhhh, tell me again Greyfeld what I'm being a "douchebag" about by pointing out the contradiction in the OP's posts? Or, what you feel is a typo. Just so I can be as enlightened as you appear to be.
Because the word "could" was obviously a typo, and was meant to be "couldn't". Very simple, if you weren't going out of your way to try to make the OP out to be the bad guy.
Regardless of if I do or I don't. It's still a fact so why comment on that? Do you mean that IF I don't do it myself I cannot tell another person that it's the law? And why do you assume I do or don't do something? What on earth does that have to do with what the OP asked?
The fact is, "lawful responsibility" sometimes covers things that are completely inane. The average american would NOT go check the license plate of a car they were borrowing, from a trusted friend, to see if such a small infraction was present or not.
You can talk about lawful responsibility till you're blue in the face, but you and I both know that were you in the same situation, you wouldn't be so blithe about saying what a person should have or shouldn't have done. It's easy to say "Well, according to the law..." when you're behind a computer screen lecturing to another person. But in the same position, you'd likely be thinking the same thing the OP is.
So to put it shortly... yes, if you don't do it yourself, you cannot tell another person it is the law. It's called being self-righteous. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 9:50:21 PM |
The fact is, "lawful responsibility" sometimes covers things that are completely inane. The average american would NOT go check the license plate of a car they were borrowing, from a trusted friend, to see if such a small infraction was present or not. No, the average american might not but that still doesn't change the fact that the LAW works that way and it doesn't change the fact that OP asked for opinions and I gave her mine.
So to put it shortly... yes, if you don't do it yourself, you cannot tell another person it is the law. It's called being self-righteous. But Greyfel dear, that would imply that you have decided that I would not do it myself and you don't know that so you cannot make that assumption.
But...for the sake of argument....say I wouldn't check it myself....I still CAN tell another person to do it. It might be self-righteous but I still CAN.
So...now....would I or wouldn't I? It's not what this thread is about. It's about OP and whether I would or not is beyond the point. I told her what the law requires.
I don't see where you starting on me assuming I would not check things myself plays into this. It would be another matter if you KNEW me and knew that I would do the same thing. But you don't so that's why I had to respond to you. You don't know me so please do not make assumptions like that.
but you and I both know that were you in the same situation, you wouldn't be so blithe about saying what a person should have or shouldn't have done. No...you and I both do NOT know this. You might think you do but you don't because you dont' know me. Speak for yourself and not for others. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 9:57:09 PM | I think that once your friend agreed to share the cost of the ticket she should have come through on that. By promising and then not following through, she's showing you disrespect.
And no, I don't think you should be solely responsible for paying for this. I can't imagine, if I made a similar mistake as your friend, not (at least) splitting the fine. Again, she's showing you disrespect. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 10:12:09 PM |
But Greyfel dear, that would imply that you have decided that I would not do it myself and you don't know that so you cannot make that assumption.
But...for the sake of argument....say I wouldn't check it myself....I still CAN tell another person to do it. It might be self-righteous but I still CAN.
So...now....would I or wouldn't I? It's not what this thread is about. It's about OP and whether I would or not is beyond the point. I told her what the law requires.
I don't see where you starting on me assuming I would not check things myself plays into this. It would be another matter if you KNEW me and knew that I would do the same thing. But you don't so that's why I had to respond to you. You don't know me so please do not make assumptions like that.
but you and I both know that were you in the same situation, you wouldn't be so blithe about saying what a person should have or shouldn't have done.
No...you and I both do NOT know this. You might think you do but you don't because you dont' know me. Speak for yourself and not for others.
The fact that you simply played devil's advocate instead of telling me that I was wrong about your car-checking habits tells me that yes, I DO know. I hate when people try to argue the details and completely ignore the core of the debate. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/18/2008 10:24:46 PM |
I told her what the law requires.
Yes, but is this really about the law? I thought it was about a relationship--about how FRIENDS should treat one another.
And I think her friend is dropping the ball. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 1:41:52 AM | This is why I live behind the phrase "Neither a borrower, nor a lender be".
You're gonna risk losing a friend over a dispute of who's at fault? Friend 1 for borrowing the vehicle, or friend 2 for lending it?
Sad.
OP borrowed "damaged goods" as it were...her mistake.
Friend lent the "damaged goods"...their mistake. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 3:59:46 AM | My brother's girlfriend was thrown in jail for running a stop sign that was hard so see, so cobs sit there and wait for people. They said that her international driver's license had to be fake. The judge, in the other hand threw it out of court.
OMG outmind, if this alone isn't reason enough to stay out of georgia, i don't know what is!
back to OP, as far as the law is concerned, you bear the sole responsibility for the ticket. on the other hand, i certainly think it's fair that your friend at least split the cost of that with you. however it seems clear that your friend cannot afford to hold up that end of the deal at this time. so i guess the real question is, is your friend worth more than the price of the ticket? | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 7:13:07 AM |
The fact that you simply played devil's advocate instead of telling me that I was wrong about your car-checking habits tells me that yes, I DO know. I hate when people try to argue the details and completely ignore the core of the debate. Are you serious? You change the topic to MY car-checking habits and say that I would do the same thing and they you think that I should tell you about MY habits?
That's not what this was about. My habits have nothing to do with this discussion.
Really greyfeld, why are you making this about me? I gave my opinon and you are saying that I can't because YOU have decided that I would do the same thing as she would so I cannot tell her about the law?
What in my first post to her indicated that I borrow cars to start with? That's the only post you had to go by when you decided that I cannot tell her about the law. What in that post say that I can't (according to you)?
The core of the debate is whether she should solely be responsible, whether I check a car I borrow or my own before driving it has nothing to do with it.
You hate it when people ignore the core? You are the one doing it...
Yes, but is this really about the law? I thought it was about a relationship--about how FRIENDS should treat one another. Well I think it's both. Legally she IS the only one responsible since she was the one driving the car at the time.
As far as the friendship goes....she askes if she should be the only one resonsible. Should or Ought? There is a difference and since OP apparently is ignorant about why cars have tags on them I assumed she is ignorant about what the law say so why not inform her about that? It's for her benefit.
Someone else said that the friend should cough up because she intially said she would. With that I agree. A promise is a promise.
Should the friend help out? I'm not so sure I think that. A quick walk around the car would have revealed that the tag was not entirely visible. OP should have noticed that but to her own accord didn't know. That makes you wonder what else she doesn't know and if she is a safe driver? I know that's a long shot but think about it. Does she know the traffic rules? Is she a safe driver?
All I'm saying is that a person has to take responsibility and when OP subsequently say that the cops are terriable I wonder if anything she would do wrong in traffic will be blamed on someone else? Yes I know it was "only" a sticker but it's not about the sticker. It's about ignorance.
I know a lot of people will be stuck on the little detail but that's not what it is about. It's about taking responsibility for your wrong doing and not blame others. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 8:44:50 AM | | The OP hasn't returned so we really don't know the whole story. If the tags were obscurred or even out of date there is no way a police officer could tell that while following the car. So I would assume she was pulled over for something else and he gave her the ticket for the plates. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 8:56:01 AM | If I was wrong I paid the fine but AGAIN it was not my car.I wonder how many people inspects a friend car before driving it. Maybe 5%.
The question was should I be the only responsible party in this matter? Not if I am a responsible driver . The next time you reply to a question it is best if you refer to the question at hand and not your extra points. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 9:01:49 AM | | I was only pulled over because of the cover of the license plate and that is it. The registration was valid and it happen in 2007 but I had to go to court in 2008. I have learned a lesson take the bus next time. But I do have a car now so if it was to happen to me I will be understanding and take responsablity of my car. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 12:11:04 PM |
Are you serious? You change the topic to MY car-checking habits and say that I would do the same thing and they you think that I should tell you about MY habits?
That's not what this was about. My habits have nothing to do with this discussion.
Really greyfeld, why are you making this about me? I gave my opinon and you are saying that I can't because YOU have decided that I would do the same thing as she would so I cannot tell her about the law?
What in my first post to her indicated that I borrow cars to start with? That's the only post you had to go by when you decided that I cannot tell her about the law. What in that post say that I can't (according to you)?
The core of the debate is whether she should solely be responsible, whether I check a car I borrow or my own before driving it has nothing to do with it.
You hate it when people ignore the core? You are the one doing it...
Whatever, you're right and I'm wrong. You're purposely avoiding the topic, and I'm not gonna sit here and debate with you.
To the OP - The moral thing to do, for your friend, would be to cover the ticket, given that it's her vehicle. But she didn't. So, you can either let it go, or decide if this sort of thing is worth burning that bridge over. I can't really tell you which way is the right way to go, as I don't know what sort of relationship the two of you have. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 12:55:06 PM | ^^^ "To the OP - The moral thing to do, for your friend, would be to cover the ticket, given that it's her vehicle. But she didn't. So, you can either let it go, or decide if this sort of thing is worth burning that bridge over. I can't really tell you which way is the right way to go, as I don't know what sort of relationship the two of you have."
Ditto....except rather than because it was her vehicle, but because she said she would help chip in for it.
~ds~ | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 1:22:28 PM |
Yeah, Ms. Foxx, because we all know, the Clayton County cops have nothing better to do, right? (rolling eyes)
I wouldn't be trashing her story. Around here, cops have a ticket quota, though they'll tell you otherwise. But it never fails, at the end of the month, suddenly there's an upshoot in traffic tickets. | |
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| Should I be the only responsible party in this matter?
Posted: 8/19/2008 3:45:32 PM |
Whatever, you're right and I'm wrong. You're purposely avoiding the topic, and I'm not gonna sit here and debate with you.
Yes Greyfeld, in this case I am right. I have not avoided the topic. I answered it in msg 15 on page 1. | |
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