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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/16/2009 7:02:25 PM | ^^^Yes! lookin4luvnlaughter...
It becomes less fun for me to be here when there is too much over analyzing and reading posts that are critical of others' opinions instead of adding to, and being more stimulating.
Why do we have to be combative and/or competitive in order to have fun?
MN | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/16/2009 7:19:40 PM |
It becomes less fun for me to be here when there is too much over analyzing and reading posts that are critical of others' opinions instead of adding to, and being more stimulating.
Why do we have to be combative and/or competitive in order to have fun?
It is obvious I am not afraid of conflict/debate....I resent general statements made in attempts to analyze a situation that I was a part of . Rather than asking questions to confirm beliefs, ML made the choice to summarize the previous posts with his beliefs. I on the other hand don't agree with his summary.
IF a total stranger came in and said the exact words I typed.....would your response been the same????
Over analyze? give me a break...
EDIT: Personally, I would not have felt comfortable as an individual reading what I read without giving an opinion. You know? I don't have to explain! | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/16/2009 9:14:45 PM |
The mere fact that there is communication is a sign of tolerance; so is acceptance of differences and every one's right to judge for themselves what fits into their version of life. Such judgment will always include rejection of other (different) thoughts, styles, cultures, belief...etc
I guess being civil about such differences/rejections is tolerant. ~ ML
^^Sounds like a fair statement, to me.
IF a total stranger came in and said the exact words I typed.....would your response been the same???? ~ RWW
I don't understand RWW, are you saying we or someone here is "less tolerant" of you specifically because of your background?
Thank God for cultural diversity (rather than cultural differences)...it is the spice of life, for me.
"Cultural differences" smacks of "you over there and us over here". It is divisive.
"Unity in diversity" is the ideal, Si?
Early in my holistic health practice I learned that people get well when they focus on health rather than illness, and the analysis of it.
"We never get to the light by endlessly researching the darkness. "
Does that make any sense, to anybody?
Perhaps it is time to focus less on the problems and more on solutions! Focus less on the past and more on the present. Maryanne Williamson said that the moment of power is in the present.
MN | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/16/2009 10:35:29 PM | Don’t you think RWW that it is hilarious whenever and whatever someone states even with the best of intentions to be totally neutral expressing their thought or opinion on a subject about people in general or a cross-section thereof, you find a way to twist it.
LOL
Since the nothing at stake seems to puzzle you,; do tell what is at stake for you at these forums where we don’t even know if the picture that is shown is the real person or not, never mind 20 years old….?
Is earning your physical well being, lively hood in jeopardy, are your professional or social status or is it some mysterious and elusive forum poster fishy you wish to impress into your web???
I resent general statements made in attempts to analyze a situation that I was a part of.- RRW.
Until you told the shoe fits I doubt anyone really thought or cared enough to think of you singularly.
Like said before you or anyone else may or may not accept or agree. IMHO
It seems when we assume, become defensive, suspicious of others intent, negativity even malice surface, the intolerant emerges often as a control mechanism -ML Well I guess you made my point, thank you.
Rather than asking questions to confirm beliefs, ML made the choice to summarize the previous posts with his beliefs.- RRW
Aside from the fact that you assumed I wrote content of belief, best I understand it in a free discussion people can contribute to a debate in form of questions, statements, hypothesis, facts or assumptions….etc. The point of a debate/discussion IMHO is to hear or learn different peoples input. How each of us handles such input is an individual choice; we may question for more clarity, agree or not.
I on the other hand don't agree with his summary - RWW.
The mere fact you point out your disagreement without offering any factual input explanations to substantiate your point confirms again what I wrote before, thank you “ Such judgment will always include rejection of other (different) thoughts, styles, cultures, belief...etc.
Unfortunately your intolerance displayed show precisely what you previously agreed with this conduct leads to.
Control Mechanism…exactly RRW
I would call it developing a consciousness…
The term “Control “ and issues related to it are generally and widely accepted as a descriptive term than most people understand in this society.
You may call things as you please and in this regard it does not come even close to breaching my tolerances, but I am slightly baffled. Developing a consciousness as opposed to being unconscious?: help: or are you attempting to introduce or impose your understandings to be accepted as mainstream language?
I don't understand RWW, are you saying ….- MN
see mesg 151, well put! | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/16/2009 10:37:41 PM |
"We never get to the light by endlessly researching the darkness. "
Does that make any sense, to anybody?
It does and it doesn't make sense. People reach into the darkness, imo, because of the pain. I think it is part of the journey and if people need to reflect upon the hurt, we should let them. Perhaps, we cannot find the light until we look into the darkness, feel the pain and purge ourselves of it.
I am not a healer like yourself, MN, but I believe that there is a time for looking into the darkness and hurting, really hurting, feeling the pain and moving on. | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 12:10:15 AM | Pain shows us that we are in the darkness.
Researching the darkness keeps us in it.
Examining our pain (our greatest teacher) may get us out of the darkness, but only if we are willing to forgive and let go of the suffering, the resentment and the need to be right.
"We never get to the light (joy) by endlessly researching the darkness (suffering)"
MN | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 1:21:14 AM | Media Naranja, the quote you made from ML’s post is a wise one. I did not make my comment on that strand of thought. I made my comments on:
the intolerant emerges often as a control mechanism…..We should wonder why in a harmless forum debate where nothing really is at stake.
I will say again, this control mechanism ML speaks about is in reality a way of developing a consciousness in others. I agree it is those that are intolerant of a situation that will develop that consciousness. In reality, it is to stop what is going on and to view a situation with a new awareness of something more; another way of thinking about what is viewed or read.
What is normally taken for granted (tolerance) is usually done with the intent of reinforcing what has always been done. Take the WE, it is inclusive. When it comes to this forum I am not the WE. I have made my thoughts known and don’t care for ML to analyze and come up with a summary that is all inclusive.
The other - nothing is at stake. My thoughts, my beliefs – what I bring to this forum…my integrity is at stake in anything I have posted.
I am familiar with ML’s style and this is another. His thinking is not true for me. Opinions are beliefs or conclusions not substantiated by positive knowledge or proof (dictionary). People like myself are free to question, make formulations of others thoughts yes?
Why do we have to be combative and/or competitive in order to have fun?
This particular thread is about tolerance and intolerance.
I have read attitudes and manipulations that have pissed me off to the high heavens and back. I have acknowledged and accepted many different thoughts from mine. I have analyzed thoughts to try and understand others thinking while at times questioning my beliefs. I didn’t start posting in this thread to have fun. If I wanted to have fun – I would post in Craig’s List thread or What I Got In My Mail Today. .
My stimulation and motivation to post in forums comes from who I am,….I don’t come in with an agenda, it is not predetermined that I am going to question the thinking of others. I have been labelled in previous posts as over analyzing. I see what is obvious to me and I might question within reason. I am simple and I have expressed myself simply when someone’s words had an impact on me.
I don't understand RWW, are you saying we or someone here is "less tolerant" of you specifically because of your background?
MN What background are you asking about? Are you suggesting that when I typed the following that I was making reference to me being First Nations?
If a total stranger came in and said the exact words I typed.....would your response been the same????
My words were a reflection of being accused of being over analytical. It has nothing to do with being First Nations; it has everything to do with what I had previously stated in other posts I have made in this particular thread; it has every thing to do with my thoughts, who I am and what I have attempted to say. Not saying a word would have meant I agree with the thinking that has gone on. The moment of power is in the present – your quote
"We never get to the light by endlessly researching the darkness. "
Does that make any sense, to anybody? Perhaps it is time to focus less on the problems and more on solutions! Focus less on the past and more on the present.
I take your quote to mean that light brings awareness - darkness means the unknown yes?
Less on problems and more on solutions….
People have different approaches to resolving issues and problems. Some tolerate while others question.
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 9:11:44 AM |
When it comes to this forum I am not the WE. I have made my thoughts known and don’t care for ML to analyze and come up with a summary that is all inclusive.
Perhaps I didn't make it clear..lol, perhaps you missed the point.
IMHO the thread is not about YOU or ME it is about tolerant or less tolerant, which I assume aims at these specific behavioral traits of all people.
Please correct me if I read you wrong, but as I read and understand most of your posts you focus on one or another poster and yourself. Your comments also include your judgment of other posters as it fits your value system and how you may feel at the time of posting.
A tolerant person would comment on the contents of a post not draw conclusions about the posters character, personality, abilities or intentions.
Msg #153 was intentionally kept neutral and general and if anything intended to make readers think about their own application of tolerance or less tolerant thoughts.
Obviously any reasonable person understands that no one can make a statement free of their very own convictions or conclusions unless we are repeating science formulas or the like. | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 9:58:05 AM | The more I read and think the more I conclude that the less tolerant are those who are walking around life with a huge chip on their shoulders. These are people who are in pain but not courageous enough yet to look within and fix their "stuff", so instead they distract themselves by finding fault in others, pointing fingers, teaming up with others of like mind and thus feeling justified and stronger.
We so much long for connection we are willing to get it wherever we can find it, sometimes.
Thus are born the divisions, whether racial, cultural, familial, gender specific, etc.
We are terrified of being alone.
Why can't we be more selective in our intolerance?
Why do we tolerate injustice in the world, famine, abuse, war...yet we are intolerant of something unimportant that we cannot change such as the color of someone's skin, or their culture and habits when they are harmless!
IMO many "intolerant people" are simply looking for a target to vent their frustrations on. Why can't we let go of our resentments? Why do we feel the need to make someone "wrong" to make ourselves feel "right"?
I've seen many sides of it. I remember the small group of immigrants that while smiling at them belittle Canadians under their breath and stick to their own because it is "better " (they should go home then, no?). These people arrogantly refuse to integrate, and undermine society. I remember well, I was in it when I arrived in Canada, several decades ago.
Take the WE, it is inclusive. When it comes to this forum I am not the WE. ~RWW
Why not? I don't understand that statement! Why are you not the WE?
If a total stranger came in and said the exact words I typed.....would your response been the same????
Yes, my response would be the same...why not?
My stimulation and motivation to post in forums comes from who I am,… ~RWW
I know you don't get paid for posting, and I doubt that anyone forces you to do it...You must get some satisfaction for doing it...What do you mean by "who I am"?
...comes from who I am,…. my thoughts, who I am... ~RWW
Who are you, exactly?
I take your quote to mean that light brings awareness - darkness means the unknown yes? ~RWW
No Re-read the following:
Pain shows us that we are in the darkness.
Researching the darkness keeps us in it.
Examining our pain (our greatest teacher) may get us out of the darkness, but only if we are willing to forgive and let go of the suffering, the resentment and the need to be right.
"We never get to the light (joy) by endlessly researching the darkness (suffering)"
MN
MN | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 10:13:19 AM |
I am going to ignore message #160 as it appears you are running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off (I’ve seen this as a little girl – quite sad but interesting- all for the sake of survival).
IMHO the thread is not about YOU or ME it is about tolerant or less tolerant, which I assume aims at these specific behavioral traits of all people.
True, your statements and summary was made as IMHO. This in effect gave me permission to read and make comments. When I read intolerance emerging as a control mechanism – you took it as being negative. I expressed a thought adding to yours with another way of viewing it and that is to see it as an act of developing a consciousness. You took it to mean an attack…ummm. I would not have thought of developing a consciousness without having read what you wrote…thank you!
you focus on one or another poster and yourself.
True. Reason? It is more specific and there is no room for generalizations. If and when I generalize – I would appreciate being called on it.
My judgment of other posters based on my belief system – True. What else do we have as individuals?
A tolerant person would comment on the contents of a post not draw conclusions about the posters character, personality, abilities or intentions.
I am not a tolerant person ML within your definition and within this forum thread. I tolerate very little of anything if it has an impact on me. I speak to it and I am very specific. You know that and so do others that have labelled me as overanalyzing .
Could be people have never been called on how they perceive issues before or they are so use to living in a bubble that they are never confronted as to how they come about forming their opinions; Or their community is not so diverse allowing for different perspectives as what is encountered here.
I have been banned as you know for making issues personal. I have been careful to stay within the context or theme of a thread to make my points. I would wish that this community forum was more diverse. You certainly would hear more thoughts different from what I’ve read in these threads.
If it is indeed my analytical ability that draws a sour note – I refuse to make comments on this for fear of creating yet another uprising as I have just witnessed. Could be I read information as given and as I said before – the slant or given innuendos does give rise to me to question my belief systems or others.
Msg #153 was intentionally kept neutral and general and if anything intended to make readers think about their own application of tolerance or less tolerant thoughts.
Obviously any reasonable person understands that no one can make a statement free of their very own convictions or conclusions unless we are repeating science formulas or the like.
I agree.
Jane I loved reading what you posted....thank you. The intent to neutralize has not gone unnoticed....
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 10:26:01 AM | ^LOL - finally, I am appreciated. This thread as grown immensely over night.
I am reflecting on something that MN said about pain showing that we are in darkness. It could be the other way around. Pain is a wonderful teacher and I agree the trick is not to get stuck in it.
Pain is relevant in this thread because people have being hurt in the past by intolerance. These may not be merely wounds but scars. | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 11:05:43 AM |
The more I read and think the more I conclude that the less tolerant are those who are walking around life with a huge chip on their shoulders. These are people who are in pain but not courageous enough yet to look within and fix their "stuff", so instead they distract themselves by finding fault in others, pointing fingers, teaming up with others of like mind and thus feeling justified and stronger.
I know a few people with chips on their shoulder. I am respectful of their intolerance as what they tend to go through is a confirmation of negative beliefs enforcing their stance. I have more empathy for them than jumping and making a judgment as to their character. You say they are not courageous enough to fix their stuff…my take is they are not aware as to how they impact others to create a change in themselves. Finding blame in others is the lowest form of resolution – we both know this don’t WE MN?
I remember the small group of immigrants that while smiling at them belittle Canadians under their breath and stick to their own because it is "better " (they should go home then, no?). These people arrogantly refuse to integrate, and undermine society.
Hmmmm….I think when immigrants come here…they tolerate and accept differing views allowing for integration (they are still here). What I hear you saying is more with an emphasis on assimilating. There is a difference…no one with a distinct language and culture want to assimilate…no one.
Why not? I don't understand that statement! Why are you not the WE?
Because it is said to reinforce his opinion and I differ – We should wonder why in a harmless forum debate where nothing really is at stake ( ML’s comment)
I know you don't get paid for posting, and I doubt that anyone forces you to do it...You must get some satisfaction for doing it...What do you mean by "who I am"?
I noticed you gave some credibility to your thoughts by making reference to what you do in life outside this thread. I am not going to give credence to what I do outside this community to give my words credibility. Take a summation of all my posts (other threads included) and formulate your own opinion….you seem to be doing just fine…lol
No Re-read the following:
I read only after I made my last post – your quote fits your beliefs. With all respect MN, darkness is your way of expressing your beliefs. I respect that…does not mean I agree. I will leave it at that!
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 12:16:32 PM |
Finding blame in others is the lowest form of resolution – we both know this don’t WE MN?
Which in the end it is no resolution at all for US, right? 
Hmmmm….I think when immigrants come here…they tolerate and accept differing views allowing for integration (they are still here). What I hear you saying is more with an emphasis on assimilating. There is a difference…no one with a distinct language and culture want to assimilate…no one.
^^^Excellent point! One I've been thinking about for some time, as it is close to home.
Immigrants (in general) come here because they are looking for a "better life", e.g. more freedom, more peace, more financial stability, etc.
Somewhere in between adapting and assimilating is the middle ground. My question is how do we find it? How does one preserve the beauty, flavor and distinctness of one's own original culture while living abroad?
I suppose what I object to is all the complaining immigrants to...the put downs and mocking that goes on behind Canadians' backs.
I suppose the answer is in maintaining ones own rituals and habits, cooking, philosophies, etc. with a flexible eye for what is Canadian, while maintaining as well an attitude of gratitude for whoever may be our benefactor (Canada).
I know you don't get paid for posting, and I doubt that anyone forces you to do it...You must get some satisfaction for doing it...What do you mean by "who I am"?
I noticed you gave some credibility to your thoughts by making reference to what you do in life outside this thread. I am not going to give credence to what I do outside this community to give my words credibility. Take a summation of all my posts (other threads included) and formulate your own opinion….you seem to be doing just fine…lol
If I had opinions about you I would not be asking of you "what do you mean by 'who I am' ". It is much better if you tell me who you are rather than me making assumptions, no?
What I do and who I am are two different things. I am not a "human doing" but a human being.
Defining oneself is futile, too restricting, I guess.
And, as far as credence/credibility is concerned...pffftttt! People always choose what they will believe, no matter what we say...
Personally, I am far from interested in judging anyone...it is IDEAS I relish. Therein lies my evolution.
I love how some threads/posts/people's ideas cause me to stretch my thinking...
Thank you all (and RWW) for sharing, without taking things personally!
MN
P.S
darkness is your way of expressing your beliefs.
Darkness? Woah! I hope not! | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 1:01:57 PM |
What I do and who I am are two different things. I am not a "human doing" but a human being.
Defining oneself is futile, too restricting, I guess.
I am in essence everything that is in my profile (or striving not trying to be).
it is IDEAS I relish. Therein lies my evolution.
The above is how I have viewed you in the past. I have seen your posts and they have been a reflection of what I might have typed – but more eloquent. I was taken aback by how abrupt you came in with your abrasiveness of questioning negativity…it was unlike anything thoughts I had about you.
It is truly a gift to be called on when impacting others….I don’t know at times when I come across negative until I see all supporting info as to how I may have effected others. My intolerance I see is a gift…lol I love being challenged….that is when growth happens.
middle ground. My question is how do we find it? How does one preserve the beauty, flavour and distinctness of one's own original culture while living abroad?
I suppose what I object to is all the complaining immigrants to...the put downs and mocking that goes on behind Canadians' backs.
I suppose the answer is in maintaining ones own rituals and habits, cooking, philosophies, etc. with a flexible eye for what is Canadian, while maintaining as well an attitude of gratitude for whoever may be our benefactor (Canada).
As an individual of a different culture and language thus philosophy of how I view the world….the last thing I want to be limited to is to fit in as that would entail assimilation. Assimilation would mean I have given up my language, my philosophy and my beliefs as a separate and distinct culture much like you stated.
The middle ground you speak of to me means acceptance and respect…allowing for integration – taking the best of both worlds. Much like developing a relationship – integrating a partnership while not losing individuality or what formed the union or desire in the first place.
I have heard other races including my own complaining about the majority. I have to remember that there is one thought that is enforced creating intolerance. It takes one person to question it’s origins and to acknowledge allowing for movement rather than being stuck. It is forming generalities that make issues larger than they really are – that goes for all cultures.
Even computers need to be defragged…lol
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 1:51:09 PM |
It is forming generalities that make issues larger than they really are – that goes for all cultures.
so we have different experiences...lol
wherever I have looked, countries, cultures, now or then I have seen bean counters who cumulatively expand simple processes into unmanageable messes for their lack (or purposely meaning to) for understanding a greater picture.
Once great cultures stalled and disappeared and many a consumer has been taken to the bank.... | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 5:52:56 PM | I cannot keep up with what is going on here so I will just focus on a point of interest.
To my knowledge, assimilation is an American concept, which is related to their melting pot philosophy and not very sound because people can lose their cultural identities if they assimilate.
In Canada, we believe in multiculturalism and view our population as a mosaic. We honour and respect cultural diversity. This is a better model because it is more respectful of cultural differences.
It is okay to have a chip on your shoulder 0r to write from darkness - not saying that anyone does. However, if you asked me (and I know you didn't), we all become a little chipped and darkened (saddened) over time and if we didn't, we probably would be insane or close to it. | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 6:16:20 PM |
Pain is relevant in this thread because people have being hurt in the past by intolerance. These may not be merely wounds but scars. ~JaneSays~
Yes, I can see that.
I can also see that intolerance is an expression of pain. No?
Which, when viewed that way would illicit compassion from others...perhaps?
It is okay to have a chip on your shoulder 0r to write from darkness - not saying that anyone does. However, if you asked me (and I know you didn't), we all become a little chipped and darkened (saddened) over time and if we didn't, we probably would be insane or close to it. ~JaneSays~
To have a chip on one's shoulder or to be in "darkness" (ignorance) is the human condition.
I think we are all in that condition, in one degree or another.
No humble person would admit that they have no dents or "baggage", big or teeny ...
I want to be clear that when I quoted that in a previous post, it was not a judgment on anyone...just a suggestion and observation that dwelling in our misery (darkness) does not provide any answers or solutions for us.
This is the opposite of what we are taught in mainstream health...that we must find the flaw, so we can fix it. Kind of like a mechanic who looks for the broken parts in the car so he can replace them.
Our human experience is not that mechanical, IMO.
We are the opposite to that!!
We are resilient beings, capable or healing and regenerating!
We fix ourselves when we turn away from dwelling on the problem in our thinking and move towards a different pattern of thinking, a more useful one, more purposeful one.
We are visionary/creative beings...yet we abort such capacity...how sad!
Anyway...have a nice day!
MN | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 6:32:09 PM |
To have a chip on one's shoulder or to be in "darkness" (ignorance) is the human condition.
I would say that we born with an abundance of light around us. Then, we live and get hurt. This puts us in a dark place. I think the ignorance is related to not knowing how to get out the dark places.
IMO --- people do not live in absolute darkness, but live parts of their lives from dark places. In some areas, people are well-adjusted and in others they are not. I think we are very complex beings. | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 7:13:28 PM | It appears to me that everyone is seeking to disengage...which is a really considerate thing.
Just so that RRW is aware, reading the thread to date, IMHO the other posters are mostly (not all, but many!) suggesting that it is RRW who has the chip on her shoulder and not some anonymous "they" to whom RRW refers.
I wanted to be clear since RRW is here for debate and communication that enlightenment can go both ways and it is my hope that RRW will make every effort possible to consider whether there might be any truth to that chip idea at all.
RRW seems to be an educated, self-aware, deep thinking person and for that reason, I am certain she can take it from this poster straight-up without the sugar coating.
(Which only proves that everyone else on here is nicer than me.)
In the interests of not causing this to be a personal issue, I will try hard not to reply to any personal response. I agree ahead of time that I have my own issues and problems and yes, that this message is probably one I "should" not have posted. Feel free to "enlighten" me back. It is always easier to see everyone else's problems and show the world how to fix it than figuring out what to do oneself! ha! | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/17/2009 10:38:19 PM |
Feel free to "enlighten" me back. It is always easier to see everyone else's problems and show the world how to fix it than figuring out what to do oneself! ha!
lol on a sort of related note; after following this thread I started to think about another quote that has popped up every once in a while: "It is none of my business what others think of me" (I almost started a thread about it today).
I never quite understood that saying, I think that it would be better to be told (as gently as possible) "you're being a b!tch"... or whatever one happens to think. I feel it could open my eyes to where I may need improvements, or what I am doing right even.
I guess that is what good friends and family are for though, but still... an honest opinion/observation from a third party is a whole "different ball of wax". | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/18/2009 8:44:26 AM | ... I feel it could open my eyes to where I may need improvements...
I have to agree with that thought.
Alas overall experiences have it with exceptions noted, most persons will have their tolerances pushed beyond their limits due to a common trait many share. No one wants to be wrong. Society reflects that by emphasizing individualism and political correctness. IMO that feeds into individual sensitivities rather than strengthening.
We know from teaching children that we must resent wrong conduct to establish awareness of right and that includes disregarding the natural and perhaps innocent child's feelings and desires.
Even the closest friends telling us a wrong does not usually feel good, at least initially and even when we must agree with them.
Part of that may be explained by our own instinctive behaviors dictating awareness of self preservation. Put into Darwin's terms a weakness means failure/death. A weakness (wrong) pointed out strikes a response of fear, creates an uncertainty of what to do. Insecurity and defensiveness (self preservation) initially reject the input until more clarity is obtained. Typically the weaker an individual believes they are the stronger the initial resentment, intolerance, regardless of their ability to reason or act.
Don't shoot me now, I do realize this is an incredibly over simplified and generalized attempt of explaining a huge topic of vastly differing human behavior. I'm convinced experts will still be writing volumes of further psychoanalysis on this a hundred years from now...possibly because by then we have a consensus that each of us is better and righter than the rest | |
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/19/2009 9:23:01 AM | I guess this is within the rules as it has not been a question by the mods to delete so I will make a response.
Just so that RRW is aware, reading the thread to date, IMHO the other posters are mostly (not all, but many!) suggesting that it is RRW who has the chip on her shoulder and not some anonymous "they" to whom RRW refers.
Smiles…don’t you think that I noticed? Who else is in this thread with a differing view that is consistently coming back?
it is my hope that RRW will make every effort possible to consider whether there might be any truth to that chip idea at all.
Lol at the chip idea..
I do take it straight up. I would not say I have a chip on my shoulder. I would say that when and only when the truth is heard and people are not ready to hear it – they run for their little bean bag of tricks with name calling and the race card innuendos.
There is nothing much I can do for others when it comes to the act of feeling cornered but to find neutrality rather than falling into infantile behaviours.
In the interests of not causing this to be a personal issue, I will try hard not to reply to any personal response. I agree ahead of time that I have my own issues and problems and yes, that this message is probably one I "should" not have posted.
I have no issue with you posting your thoughts.
You can fight your own demons
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| The tolerant and the less-tolerant
Posted: 8/19/2009 9:46:07 AM |
I can also see that intolerance is an expression of pain. No?
Which, when viewed that way would illicit compassion from others...perhaps?
Depends on the context… intolerance for others beliefs is an expression of a differing view. It is speaking to the injustice of what is right; the act is behaviour of creating new awareness other than what might be obvious to you. I do however feel pain for those that are unjustly condemned and tolerated. There is a difference!
To have a chip on one's shoulder or to be in "darkness" (ignorance) is the human condition. I think we are all in that condition, in one degree or another.
No humble person would admit that they have no dents or "baggage", big or teeny ...
I could understand MN that the terms you use above is a way for you to communicate about te “darkness”. I on the other hand don’t see the same symbolism darkness). I see the word for it’s original meaning…simple as that. Filling words with it’s symbolism can cause a lot of limits real or imagined…lol. In effect I don’t agree with the above.
dwelling in our misery (darkness) does not provide any answers or solutions for us. …...that we must find the flaw, so we can fix it. …We are resilient beings, capable or healing and regenerating! …We fix ourselves when we turn away from dwelling on the problem in our thinking and move towards a different pattern of thinking, a more useful one, more purposeful one. ….We are visionary/creative beings...yet we abort such capacity...how sad!
Again you are limiting the capabilities of our human qualities. I think you are contradicting your thoughts.
I do hope that in tapping into your sources and origins of your voice above it comes back to the question of tolerance and intolerance….which is the topic.
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