| | First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The UnexpectedPage 2 of 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) | I'm still trying to figure this out . woman will have sex on first date IF , they ask to there place ? You mean they don't want to "just " chat . or rest at night ? I must be one in a billion who does not think of a woman like that . The day I get a first date and a woman asks me to her place for sex First I would have be second everyone would know . freinds would say here we go again . run he met a woman and she said she loved him . | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/23/2008 4:01:20 PM | | John, If you really liked her why don't you just call her and discuss it and tell her how you feel on the matter. IT is possible that she is not in the habit of doing this and was very into you and after drinking the way she did it just made it that more intense. You will never know if you don't talk to her and you will always wonder. YOu have nothing else to lose. People sometimes make mistakes but that doesn't necessarily make her a slut. I would never do that on a first date but that is just me. | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/23/2008 5:35:34 PM | From post 18:
"...And if I were a guy...that would be the reason I'd turn her down. Not because it's the first date, or because she is initiating. I mean, there's a way to initiate sex, and that ain't it! ...."
I am a guy and I agree! | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/23/2008 10:36:23 PM | To be honest with you, you're gay. Just going to chat and cuddle? Yeah, because that is what happens when she invites you back to her house after drinks. At least her husband didn't pop out of the closet with nothing but leather mask on... | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/23/2008 10:57:33 PM | Yup,sex on the first date does happen...if the woman was the woman that I am with right now,I definately would have banged her you did the right thing,you handle yourself well,perhaps when she is in a straight state of mind she'll think your a classy dude... I myself perfer sex with no alcohol...its waaaaaaaaay better... nothing wrong with chattin and cuddling cause now my woman gonna say..is all we gonna do is cuddle good luck to you dude,hope that it works out for ya.. | |
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wolftx
| | Joined: 5/29/2008 Msg: 38 | |
| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/23/2008 11:19:22 PM |
She invited me back to her place, and I accepted thinking we could continue getting to know each other better. I don't know whether you are very rude or very clueless. I don't know why so many women on this thread think you are a gentleman - as a gentleman you would have dropped her off at the door or said good-bye earlier, as she was tipsy BEFORE you got there. Your entering her home is leading her on.
Think about it: The woman invited you to her place, which is a sign of trust. It is also a good approach to pave the way for more. You accepted. Now things go well, and she opens up even more. She strips and offers herself to you (sitting on all fours???). You blatantly rejected her and made a total a$$ out of her in her own house. Congratulations, you really made herself feel special and gorgeous. I would be surprised, if you ever heard from her again. And thanks for ruining her for the rest of us - how often do you think she'll pull that stunt again?
"Did I do the right thing?" No - on so many levels... | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 12:02:23 AM | Yeah I think you did the right thing. I would of just thrown it in to the spank bank and been on my way.
Honestly I'm like that too. I just can't do that to people. I had so many chances in Highschool to have sex I just never did it because I always thought it was under wrong circumstances.
I'm still a virgin and I regret nothing! | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 12:11:21 AM | Re post 25: "god I hate it when women think just because a guy has had a few drinks she thinks they can take advantage of a guy because she has of course a gorgeous body"
There are many many to look at this story, that is ine of them, and the most meninist one! It does have some merit.
--------- How many men she has done this with before is IMO irrelevant, provided a condom was used and was going to be used or gping to be used.
She may indeed feel to embarrashed to pull that stunt again! But is that good or bad.
Moral of the story: Do not strip when intoxicated!
Detail: she was not all "all fours" if she was covering her breasts with her arms! Unless she has 4 hands.
Moral of the story: Do not drink and date! | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 1:33:32 AM |
I wish I knew whether it was the alcohol influencing her or not. Ask her.
Maybe I'm being too harsh I don't know. About what? What judgement have you passed on her?
Same goes for her basic character-was it the alcohol or was that her true character coming through? Again, what judgement are you passing on her?
What should I have done different? About what? What results are you wanting to change? You did not force her, ask her, or accept her offer, to take her clothes off; she did that entirely independent of you; and you have zero responsibility either way.
Did I do the right thing? Whether or not you did the right thing is strictly up to you. No one else has the right to impose their beliefs of right and wrong on you. Do you feel good about yourself, and the results? If you do, then you did the right thing.
Since you haven't even decided whether or not you're going to call her again; why does any of this matter? It smells to me like you are judging her; if that is true, do her a favor, and don't call her. She doesn't deserve that any more than you do. | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 2:22:18 AM | I don't know why so many women on this thread think you are a gentleman - as a gentleman you would have dropped her off at the door or said good-bye earlier, as she was tipsy BEFORE you got there. Your entering her home is leading her on.
Thank you. I was wondering the same thing. I don't know any man that would think that a woman with a "gorgeous body" inviting them back to their place is thinking that the woman only wants to talk. . If you were a real gentleman then you would have left her at the door and told her you would call her later. Just like if we ask a woman back to our place after the first date she knows what we are really saying and they would think we are jackasses (some would). Same logic goes to this. | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 3:35:52 AM | | What should you have done? ....If nothing else, you should have complimented her about her gorgeous body and given her a massage. Then if you weren't ready for sex at least you left her feeling good. And then kiss her goodnight | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 3:59:48 AM | | I think you handled what could have been an a strained situation with some class - come on - you know when you've hit it off well enough to forego caution and actually have sex on the first date - you took the high road and I think you should be congratulated . | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 7:10:05 AM | Sleeping with someone on a first date does not make one a slut in my Opinion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I agree with ruckus123.
In fact, ALOT of men AND women feel this way. Some are just too blatant to admit it 'online.' Be real! | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 7:22:35 AM |
It must suck being homosexual!!!
That sucks getting called gay by a dude in a pink shirt! ;)
Tough situation for certain, but not something you can't overcome. Think about the stories you'll tell your children! "Well kids, on our first date your mother......." Awesome.
One phrase comes to mind.......paralysis by analysis. Stop over-analyzing and just chalk it up to one of those embarrassing moments that you can laugh about later on in life whether you are together or not. If you feel you must try to figure out everyone's motivations for doing something you'll spend your life like a modern day Hamlet rather than someone that lived life. It's nice to see that you called her and decided to get to know each other further.
Good luck to you. | |
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| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 7:42:44 AM | | I can't believe some of the tacky responses given. There is nothing wrong with trust OR thinking someone may just want to sit and talk, laugh...get to know each other. How dare anyone say it is a clear sign of sexual intentions? Not everybody thinks of sex when it comes to "my place or yours". It can be a comfort zone. Sure, there are bad apples in any situation, but I don't think he did a thing wrong. | |
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wolftx
| | Joined: 5/29/2008 Msg: 50 | |
| First Date-Met On POF-Click-Her Place-The Unexpected Posted: 8/24/2008 8:16:20 AM |
How dare anyone say it is a clear sign of sexual intentions? Take a poll if you want, it does not get much clearer than that. Wasn't your line of reasoning the defense of the Tyson (or whoever it was) girl who did not know to expect sex in his hotel room at 2am? Let's just say that a late night invitation increases the likelihood of something happening dramatically.
I am glad that the OP gets a second chance (much to my surprise). And I hope it is not just to get him in the mood, have him get naked and take pictures of him to spread on the internet for revenge... | |
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