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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Hell hath no fury.....      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 saggy ass and saggy tits
Joined: 5/22/2008
Msg: 26
Hell hath no fury.....Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I think its all depends how the break up was handled. What did a person do to the other.
 Raging Heart-on
Joined: 8/4/2008
Msg: 27
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 7:17:11 AM
We're talking about two different types of fury :

physical ( men )

emotional/financial ( women )

When a man is furious at another man he will try and destroy his body ; when a woman is furious at a man she will try and destroy his life.
 Jaxi_2008
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 28
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History
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 7:49:16 AM
Plastic Sturgeon....what do you mean about "the AGE thing?" I don't understand.....
 Discerning Virtuosa
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 29
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History
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 7:52:39 AM
The strangest thing is that when people really go off the deep end
over another, it was usually not a good relationship anyway


Oh so very true!!!!!!!
.....and why was it not a good relationship? Because both people were unstable to begin with.


To understand this, a good read is "Lethal Lovers and Poisonous People,
How to Protect Yourself From Relationships That Make You Sick"


Looking back at relationships that of course didn't last, I spent a lot of time during them with bronchitis, arthritis, back problems, etc. I haven't been in a relationship for 3 years - not even so much as a cold. I'm going to get that book


I think the whole "Hell has no fury" way of thinking allows men to stereotype women as mentally unstable, vengelful, unreasonable, hysterical, toxic, and just plain crazy. I've never eve raised my voice at a man, but my rifle's always loaded.
 Snakewhisperer
Joined: 2/3/2008
Msg: 30
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History
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 8:05:09 AM
Why, are you planning on scornng a woman in the near future, Dave?
 ma_cherie_pi
Joined: 8/18/2008
Msg: 31
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 8:23:38 AM

A lot of women can, and often do go overboard when things don't go their way. I am yet to see a woman take the "high road".


If there's one thing I've learned it's that someone who treats me like that doesn't deserve any more time or torment I would inflict upon myself.


It would be hard to verify this without scouring the corners of hell to make sure that there was no greater fury in existence there.


My thoughts on fure are these:
- He who angers you, controls you.
- Anger is just fear leaving the soul. (Yes, borrowed from the expression "Pain is just weakness leaving the body)

When I encounter anger, within others or myself, I immediately recognize it as fear, and seek it's root cause. I've found that most, if not all, anger in a romantic (perceived or real) relationship stems from the fear of rejection.


When anyperson is dumped, the react and it depends on how much the had invested in the relationship.


And in the case of this play, the guy dumped her at the altar. Yeah, I'd say she'd rightfully be pretty upset.

But, in today's world, the reaction can also depend upon the person's maturity level.

Just my $.02.


 Plastic Sturgeon
Joined: 12/5/2007
Msg: 32
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 8:37:25 AM
To clarify the "AGE THING"

It's about the competition women constantly find themselves in
with younger women, or being dumped for them!

In these forums, I don't believe I've ever seen anything get women
as ANGRY as some guy (usually a newbie) announcing his dissatisfaction
that only older women are contacting him! lol

EDIT: Post Below. Anything must obviously be taken with a grain of
salt and common sense! I've read whole books and only one sentence
contained therein was immensely valuable to me.

In general, anything that causes people to examine themselves is a good thing!
 WC02118
Joined: 4/23/2008
Msg: 33
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 8:37:45 AM
Hey Platic, i have to agree with your quick synapsis.. but I do hav eto say, i think self-help books are getting a bit shallow as far as relationships are concerned. everyone who reads them may see "SOME" similarities in their relationships to the books, but for the most part, book sar eonly good in Outline form to each relationship.

The "Hell Hath no Fury" line I think is somewhat true because men tend to be more logic seekers than emotional dwellers mostly by upbringing. Yes, i know there are all sorts of people and everyone gets their lines crossed when you make a blanket statement, but as a whole, the majority rules. I have quite a few femaile friends who stick by the aspect that "Women can b ebrutal" and since I'm not "in the club" and they are, i tend to believe them. I think an emotional onslaught is much worse in most cases when it comes from a woman. th eguy's goal is usualy get the hell out of there and leave with the last word. Women want the last word to be a hot poker and they want it shoved up your... A.. when you'r eon the way out the door.

Going back to what you said though, ANY relationship where someone is getting irrationally angry, is bad. It shouldn't EVER reach that point. Sometimes the emotional and the logical need to have a meeting of the minds to figure it all out. Middle ground seems to be the hardest ground to achieve thes edays though..
 Aries0328
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 34
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:08:17 AM
I've been on the receiving end of the fury. I know it was the individuals but the amount of energy and extent of destruction they can go to is mind numbing.

* Rejection - The ability to take a long term relationship and turn absolutely everything into the rejection of you as a person with no sympathy or empathy

* Emotional - The ability to turn emotions off and use all of your exposed vulnerabilities against you to dehumanize and belittle without conscience

* Legal - The ease of using the police as a weapon and a simple call claiming abuse (never happened but was threatened)

* Financial - Especially when kids are involved. Will stop at nothing to take everything you have and could have in the future

* Personal - The ability to simply walk up to a favorite possession and simply destroy it.

* Irrational - The ability to take any situation and turn it into a life altering destructive event with no understandable reason of what was actually wrong and no hope of recovery.

* Chameleon - The ability to take all prior agreed upon arrangements and just say they were never in agreement and everything is null and void.

* Frustration - The ability to do all of the above while living together and tell you to leave because they are not going anywhere regardless of how unhappy they are and irrational the whole situation is.

I'm sure guys can do these things as well but the special ability of women to do them just because they want to and have no concern of retaliation or concern for the harm caused. The longer the relationship and the more vulnerable a guy is by allowing himself to be vulnerable in the relationship the worse it can get.

The irrational anger and depth of vengeance is soooo difficult to handle. Watching it build up over time and having absolutely no ability to change what’s coming is confusing. Initial reactions are to try to become more vulnerable but this only gives them more power. Next reactions are to become upset yourself but this just becomes justification for escalation. Next is protection which escalates mind games. Next is Fight or Flight.

Oh crap! Now I forgot why I want a relationship!!!!!
 Eric48
Joined: 2/7/2007
Msg: 35
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:09:44 AM

Do you feel that sentiment is accurate?

Yes, I've been to Hell ...


and I'd rather have a root canal without anesthesia, than suffer a woman's wrath.

 dreamcatcher39
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 36
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History
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:25:51 AM

and I'd rather have a root canal without anesthesia, than suffer a woman's wrath

I dont know about that one, i recently had that root canal. I have also been on the receiving end of some fury filled men. Me thinks i will take the rantings of a lunatic, over the root canal.
 Aries0328
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 37
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:34:59 AM
I will take the root canal...

At least with the root canal you know the pain will be over soon!!!!
 Hawk8414
Joined: 7/19/2008
Msg: 38
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:37:45 AM
Anybody here remember the good old mother in law days? lmao! If I could ever really hate anyone it would be my first husbands mother! You talk about hell, that woman was hell on wheels! She could make you rlife Hell all she had to do was scheme, and scheme, and lie, and hurt you over and over again. I nearly went to her ass once with a rolling pin! Her pussified son grabbed me to stop me. Now you know why we're divorced! LMAO!
 Discerning Virtuosa
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 39
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History
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:38:07 AM
I've been on the receiving end of the fury. I know it was the individuals but the amount of energy and extent of destruction they can go to is mind numbing.

* Rejection - The ability to take a long term relationship and turn absolutely everything into the rejection of you as a person with no sympathy or empathy

* Emotional - The ability to turn emotions off and use all of your exposed vulnerabilities against you to dehumanize and belittle without conscience

* Legal - The ease of using the police as a weapon and a simple call claiming abuse (never happened but was threatened)

* Financial - Especially when kids are involved. Will stop at nothing to take everything you have and could have in the future

* Personal - The ability to simply walk up to a favorite possession and simply destroy it.

* Irrational - The ability to take any situation and turn it into a life altering destructive event with no understandable reason of what was actually wrong and no hope of recovery.

* Chameleon - The ability to take all prior agreed upon arrangements and just say they were never in agreement and everything is null and void.

* Frustration - The ability to do all of the above while living together and tell you to leave because they are not going anywhere regardless of how unhappy they are and irrational the whole situation is.


aries - You said you were speaking from experience here. I always have two questions when men tell me about women in their past like this.
1. For every action, there is a reaction. If this was her reaction, what did you do to cause it?
2. If you did absolutely nothing to merit this behavior, why would choose to get involved with an unstable woman that is a few sandwiches short of a picnic?

I ask this of men who have been burned by women in the past and it is keeping them from a future HEALTHY relationship.
 Plastic Sturgeon
Joined: 12/5/2007
Msg: 40
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 9:54:36 AM
That's why I say it again and again and again!

People need to STOP looking at the other person pointing fingers and
simply start looking at themselves! It's the ONLY way they will ever
GROW! It's also the only way, some people will escape the cycle they
may find themselves in!
 Aries0328
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 41
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 10:09:53 AM
aries - You said you were speaking from experience here. I always have two questions when men tell me about women in their past like this.
1. For every action, there is a reaction. If this was her reaction, what did you do to cause it?
2. If you did absolutely nothing to merit this behavior, why would choose to get involved with an unstable woman that is a few sandwiches short of a picnic?

I ask this of men who have been burned by women in the past and it is keeping them from a future HEALTHY relationship.


1: I existed. :-) I never should have been in the relationships but was struck with that self esteem bug. I thought I could change them... ok, mostly "her". I learned a lot from the really bad one and am still learning. Now I know I can't change anyone.

2: She became increasingly mentally unstable as time went on. I really wasn't with her for more than a year total but the drama continued for 8 years because we had a child.

3: It has kept me from being in a healthy relationship in the past. The past 6 years I have had two relationships and through both of them I have learned more about myself and am not worried of repeating the past. I lived with one for about a year and as soon as we moved in together she changed every aspect of why I moved in with her because she changed her mind about what she wanted from the relationship. I wouldn't give her what she wanted and it didn't go well from there but it didn't turn ugly and destructive. Just frustrating and depressing.
 lookinatit
Joined: 5/29/2008
Msg: 42
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 10:15:54 AM
I'd say that depends on the woman. Fortunately, I've never experienced the fury and hope I never do.
 Davey_Decker
Joined: 2/24/2008
Msg: 43
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 11:31:58 AM
Yes, it's accurate.

If a man is crossed by another man, he can hit him.

A woman is crossed by a man she usually CAN'T hit him, so she has to work her anger out in as many ways as she can to get revenge. How she gets revenge will be in all the ways she knows matter to him - his reputation, suddenly witholding favours to him, making him jealous, making him paranoid - until she's no longer angry.

Given the slow emotional release compared to being able to just punch somebody, this process can take a while.
 x_file
Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 44
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 1:42:45 PM


Please, you just don't obviously know too many women then. My last relationship ended, putting my house into foreclosure for being sucked dry by my ex-fiance, just to find out he was a meth addict. Ya I took the High road & I took it all the way from California to Oklahoma, LOL . Not all women are the same, just as all men or children or animals are the same.


You might be an exception, but the exception isn't the "rule", so to speak. Women are not the same. I claim that each and every woman is different. Each and everyone woman takes the "low road" differently. Some like name calling, others like to make fun of "size", yet others like plain old swearing, and some just like burning their man alive.
 GoneSailinBabe
Joined: 7/6/2008
Msg: 45
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 4:04:18 PM
My wrath in the past was a destructional force to be reckoned with, although brilliantly utilized - I did wreak havoc and now...see the error in my ways (my poor exhusband!)

Now, many, many, many years and experiences later.

I never become angry.
I simply do not allow myself to.

I wonder if ever I could be incited to ignite again - and I find instead that when faced with situations that in the past would have irked me, I now laugh. At the rediculousness of the situations.

Some maturity, some wisdom, some personal growth, but largely it's looking at the reality of life and realizing that life and relationships are short. Too short. Anyone that really matters to you - you don't WANT to harm with anger or hurtful words or actions.

I only have people in my life who DO matter to me and zero time or tolerence for the people who do not. That includes wasting time or breath on anger.

Rather be laughing or sailing!
Or both!
 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 46
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Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 5:29:02 PM

(Msg 31) Why, are you planning on scornng a woman in the near future, Dave?


I never, ever scorn. I'm most grateful for any "attention" a woman bestows upon me.
 Ismene1
Joined: 7/25/2008
Msg: 47
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/29/2008 11:24:55 PM
Congreve wrote during a period of Western history when a woman's place in society was very different than today: women were not formally educated, they were considering illogical, they were bred and raised to be childbearers, wives, second class citizens; a woman's mind was not valued, and she was believed to be ruled by emotion. Therefore, it couldn't really be said his statement was misogynistic but merely a reflection of the attitude of the times. What is disheartening is that people in the 21st century continue to repeat this statement as if it were truth personified. It isn't. Both men and women can behave with negative emotional intensity, to get back at someone, to inflict vengence.....it isn't a province of women only. We can see that over and over again if we only look at history. We can see it in our daily lives. We can see it and hear about it on such sites as this where men as well as women take rejection very badly. I had a stalker on another site because I rejected him. I learned later it wasn't the first time he 'bothered' a woman because she rejected him. It's illogical and not born out by the evidence that when a woman is scorned she may tend to be more vengeful than a man.
 James_in_SD
Joined: 7/3/2006
Msg: 48
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/30/2008 11:14:27 AM
That was not actually written by William Shakespeare, but another man with the same name.
 Ismene1
Joined: 7/25/2008
Msg: 49
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/30/2008 11:35:20 AM
^^^^^ per wiki:

"Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned," spoken by Perez in Act 3, Scene 2. The Mourning Bride (1697) by William Congreve

This usually appears as "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned".
 nuttykitten
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 50
Hell hath no fury.....
Posted: 8/30/2008 1:09:29 PM
im not into revenge, i just think to myself, what goes around, comes around.
wich is normally true.
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