| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 11/2/2008 1:48:32 PM |
If you sat there and considered all the**** she's had in her mouth and **** would you still respect her? If you really thought about what she's done, would you still want to kiss her and have sex with her ?
Yes. I've heard a similar thing before. I didn't realise that men often see it that way. Women don't seem to think of the physical mechanics of sex. We're more concerned about the cuddling you did after you had sex with other women. | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 11/2/2008 2:16:45 PM | A-ha, opportunity to destroy another of those dreaded double-standards!
For starters, I appreciate your mathematical analysis back on page 1, Pixy Dust. “Lovers per year”… hmm-mmm, an interesting statistic. As this is a dating site, maybe BigFish should consider adding this attribute?? I mean, it sure makes more sense to acknowledge this than whether or not you own a car!
Okay… seriously… it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest if the woman had more sexual partners, experience, or whatever. My concerns would be about precautions taken, disease avoidance, and whether or not it was for enjoyment or notches on the bedpost, because they speak of integrity and character – and that does matter to me.
On second thought, I’d like to amend that. If she has had something like 100 sexual partners, then I doubt she would be my “type”, which leaves the issue moot. If she was into the more kinkier aspects, then even if I’ve had more encounters, chances are that I’m not her type. And, let’s face it… if many more than 100, then we must be dealing with a… never mind.  | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 12/15/2008 5:30:32 AM | Reminds me of the character in "Best in Show" played by Catherine O'Hara who was married to Eugene Levy's character. Everywhere they went, these skeezy guys were reminding her of the "Great Time" they had together on such and such a day.
I have had very few partners because all my relationships tended to last a long time (over 3 years each with some serious break time between partners). The girl I am dating now has had numerous "hook-ups" but has never really had a serious long term relationship. She is still close friends with two of the guys she was f-ing a few years ago. I was very insecure about it until I realized she is very special and I want this to work out. So, I accepted it. Leave all that jealousy, mistrust, and insecurity behind you. If it works out, great, if not, you gave it your best shot. If she decides to f someone else and you have decided together this is not acceptable, then you have to dump her. That's it! | |
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bw1984
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Joined: 12/13/2008
Msg: 256 | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/2/2009 8:18:21 PM | If she used protection EVERY TIME and has been checked out and is clean, what's the big deal? The only concern is if she would be willing to cheat on you, and for that you would have to know her well enough to make a judgement call and stick to it, hell or high water.
Depending on her age, I dont think this is that big of a deal. Early 20's, yeah, I'd have to pause. Mid to late 30's-40's? Hell, both of you had sex before you met. As long as your willing to communicate and stick to each other, I see no problem. You have to talk to her, and probe a little and talk about it to see if you can trust her. Good luck. | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/2/2009 9:00:36 PM | | In the end we are all human and have needs and desires, I have been with more than one woman in my life and do not expect to find a real woman that has only been with one man. The truth is I would prefer a woman that has been "around" because they are the ones that most appreciate a man that puts the effort into pleasing their partners. I would also prefer that the woman I grow old together with know that I'm the one , rather than have her spend a lifetime with me wondering "what if". So my answer is yes I could hold hands with passion and love with someone I know has known many partners. | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/2/2009 9:15:59 PM | I'd say whatever number she or anyone's significant other tells them is short.I mean if you have a nice open relationship but it shouldn't be too bad but no one I mean no one tells the truth in that regard.I mean it's not always because they want to lie to you,but hey that's just my two since.
I think whatever the past is it's the past....... | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/2/2009 11:07:07 PM | If she said you were the best she'd ever had, would it make you feel better? Yes being lied to always makes us guys feel better as long as it strokes our ego. 
Never...never....NEVER......tell a guy your "number"!!! Geez.... And guys... if she does tell you the number NEVER bring it up and use it against her in an argument. I did that once and I regretted it. After all, I already knew that before the argument so it was stupid to bring it up. She just said "oh, does that gross you out? Fine, I'll go fvck 48 more guys tonight and send you the video".
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/3/2009 7:57:57 PM |
And guys... if she does tell you the number NEVER bring it up and use it against her in an argument. I did that once and I regretted it. After all, I already knew that before the argument so it was stupid to bring it up. She just said "oh, does that gross you out? Fine, I'll go fvck 48 more guys tonight and send you the video".
That's right baby!
Ahhh, the perils of La Double Standard. | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/3/2009 8:46:12 PM | | Im diffrent then most guys-the way i think-who cares if he had it before-if it was that good he'd still be gettin it wouldnt he. Plus the past is the past-unless u see traces of the past in the present-love is love.If u truly love someone u express it knowing the good the bad and the ugly. If anything i would appreciate her honesty-ask for medical records-and after i saw results and everything was up to par-try to knock her socks off every chance i got. Me knowing she had that much experience-i'd wanna be one of the best experiences she had with a man-so she knows where its at-and wouldnt have to roam like she did in her past | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/3/2009 9:15:56 PM |
if it was that good he'd still be gettin it wouldnt he
That theory only works if she dumped him. He might have knocked her socks off, but dumped her...
ask for medical records
And those medical records won't tell you if she acquired any STDs in the last 3 months, that are still too dormant to show in testing....
They also won't tell you if she can still have kids, or if an earlier STD made her sterile...
They also won't tell you if she has or will get cervical cancer from HPV...
They also won't tell you if she has anything the doctor didn' think to test her for....
i'd wanna be one of the best experiences she had with a man-so she knows where its at-and wouldnt have to roam like she did in her past
And if you weren't one of her "best experiences"......????? | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/3/2009 9:40:25 PM | it's a pretty safe bet that most women have been with more guys than most guys have been with women. so what if she's slept around. given the opportunity, you'd probably do the same. it's a bs double standard that a woman is a slut if she's been around the block but a guy is a mack daddy if he's done the same. the number is irrelevant. neither party should ask or even volunteer that number. as long as you're with her, you're both clean, and things are going good (and certain parts aren't worn out and you know what i mean) then who cares? i'd say 100 is a pretty "average" number for a 27-35 year old woman. some might say it's below average. 200 wouldn't even surprise me in that age range. but it still doesn't matter as long as the aforementioned criteria are met.
some women will front like that number is impossible or that they could never be "that girl." i'm not saying all women are like that but i am saying when you do the math and consider how easy it is for a woman to get laid as opposed to a man, then the numbers add up. and with numbers like that, you'd expect her to know what she's doing in the sack... | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/3/2009 10:03:13 PM | | first; to b.c.the3rd, I want to high 5 that comment and your right! it is a load of crap! the truth is that a "REAL" woman has confidence and knows what she wants and likes. The only way to truely know that is if you've kissed alot of frogs and know what you don't want! Let's face reality here; there are far to many temptations in our current society to expect even the most pure to not be pushed into desire! Accept this fact and know that if she ever turns on a tv or logs on to anything, she will be faced with what is within her. So the bottom line is would you prefer someone who is honest and is willing to tell you her fantasies and desires or do you want someone who keeps it looked up inside her? and yes guys I can assure you she does fantisize! and sometimes[not about you]. "honesty is allways better"....trust me "I know". | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/4/2009 7:09:33 AM |
i'd say 100 is a pretty "average" number for a 27-35 year old woman. some might say it's below average. 200 wouldn't even surprise me in that age range. but it still doesn't matter as long as the aforementioned criteria are met.
Maybe in your neck of the woods....
I know men and women who are still in the single digits...
Heck, I know people who have never been on that many dates, let alone dated or slept with that many people.... | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/4/2009 7:12:21 AM |
how do you guys feel when your woman tells you she had lot's of casual sex and f-buddies before you met? [70-100] what if you know several of the from your life growing up? what if you know too many details? is there such a thing? can you still grow old together, sit on a rocking chair holding her hand and feel "ok"? do you ever feel emabarrased knowing so many other guys just knew her as easy? just wondering, not self pitying. would most like to hear from guys IN this kind of situation, not bashers. do you ever obsess on it even though you do not want to?
Wouldn't matter to me as long as she wasn't going to be sleeping with other guys while she and i together. | |
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| men, how do you feel when the woman you love tells you she had many [30-...] f- buddies?
Posted: 2/4/2009 8:20:45 AM |
it's a bs double standard that a woman is a slut if she's been around the block but a guy is a mack daddy if he's done the same
kow626.........Some women do not applaud a man who has racked up numbers, same as they do not applaud a woman. According to dictionary.com....the term whore is not gender specific.
I'd say 100 is a pretty "average" number for a 27-35 year old woman. some might say it's below average. 200 wouldn't even surprise me in that age range. but it still doesn't matter as long as the aforementioned criteria are met.
This just boggles my mind. Maybe its your area of the country, but I don't know of anyone that has these kinds of numbers!
The truth is I would prefer a woman that has been "around" because they are the ones that most appreciate a man that puts the effort into pleasing their partners.
3Levint....If someone is bumping uglies nightly with different men, please explain to me how that makes them more appreciative to a man's efforts? Most times they are having sex with virtual strangers. Sex gets better when a couple get to know each other and their likes/dislikes. This doesn't happen if one is having sex with just strangers.
the truth is that a "REAL" woman has confidence and knows what she wants and likes. The only way to truely know that is if you've kissed alot of frogs and know what you don't want! Let's face reality here; there are far to many temptations in our current society to expect even the most pure to not be pushed into desire! Accept this fact and know that if she ever turns on a tv or logs on to anything, she will be faced with what is within her. So the bottom line is would you prefer someone who is honest and is willing to tell you her fantasies and desires or do you want someone who keeps it looked up inside her? and yes guys I can assure you she does fantisize! and sometimes[not about you]. "honesty is allways better"....trust me "I know".
A real woman does have confidence and does know what she wants and likes. But how does that equate into having sex with tons of partners? If a person is in a ltr with an open minded person, more than likely they will try just about anything (within both of their sexual boundaries). Yes, there are a lot of temptations out there, but who says we have to act on them? Some of us prefer to keep our panties on until we get to know someone. All of us have fantasies. But most of us would prefer to act out our fantasies with someone that trust and know, not with a bunch of strangers.
A large number of partners would be a turn off for some people, me included. Part of it is because if they've had that many partners, it tells me that they probably have trouble maintaining a ltr or could possibly have other insecurity issues. I value sexual intimacy between two loving people, but I don't value sex with strangers. I could get laid every night of the week, but I choose not to. Sexual intimacy without an emotional connection is like having chocolate chip cookies without a glass of milk. Yeah, the cookies taste the same, but the experience was no where near as good as it would have been with the milk.
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