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| | PLEASE HELPPage 16 of 37 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37) | I am not discounting your feelings- you sound like the guy that probably replaced me in her life-
BPD's seem to be attracted to caring and thoughtful types..
The feelings you are experiencing are not unusual, nor unexpected- I could have written the exact post four years ago- and today I am not the same as I was before I met Liz..
I tried a couple of dates, but the feelings were not possible, the intensity of our five year relation was probably not to ever be repeated, nor would I want to - but the cost benefit of extending your own feelings and hopes just don't seem to be worth the effort-
I have pulled my profile a couple of years ago, and just engage in the forums, at first I hoped I might attract someone who was like minded through discussion, but the forums seem to be a one way street to vent.. too bad..
Hey all I can tell you is that many are going through the same thing you are experiencing right now, and some are going to in the future, these personalities are not stable, nor want to be- they have an inborn aversion to that which they seek.. and if you attempt to give it to them, they find reason to hate you for it..
The chief consideration is for you to not feel the guilt, and to put it into perspective, altho I haven't a clue to how that works, we share an experience not unlike those who serve in combat- you have to have been there to understand- I do, and I hope you are able to move past the storm... | |
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Posted: 6/22/2008 8:20:19 PM | MBLEGENDjeah,
It'll get better. I know because I'm going through the same thing right now. However, what I came to realize that helped with both the split and my recovery is that I'd have been much, much worse off if I were still with her! When the problems began they escallated exponentially. It took a huge toll on me and even then it was the most difficult thing in the world that I've ever done to walk away. So, I feel your pain, I really do. But trust me, keep getting help, don't focus on her ( she choose her path, you need to focus on yours), and you will get better. Fingers crossed for you. | |
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Posted: 6/22/2008 8:30:00 PM |
I used to be so normal. Now, i actually feel like i have turned into the girl she was when i met her. Someone scared, depressed, lonely, confused and un-loved.
I have all the support in the world, but my mind is always against me, making me feel so bad, what do i do????????????????
uuummmmmm
This is starting to sound a tad familiar to me....
Can I ask how you know that your girlfriend is BPD....how did you find that out?
Why is your mind against you....why do you feel bad?
Have you always had trouble letting things go....and have you always been so empathetic to the trouble of others?
At the very least, you're obsessing about her....this can be addictive, like smoking. Start breaking the habit now, you're very young, and have a long way to go......
The longer you wallow, the more of a habit it will become....YOU DON'T WANT THIS! I know from experience that this is easier said than done, but change your habits...do different things than you do now....it doesn't matter what it is, just break your pattern....and keep on doing it.
The fact that you say she hates you doesn't help....nobody likes rejection. I'm going to take a shot in the dark here, and say that you vehemently opposed the breakup....even though she had done bad things to you.
This suggests that your self esteem and self worth are reeeaaallllyyyyy low. Why?
You can keep posting here about your heartbreak forever, if you like.....you're asking for help, but do you really want it ? | |
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Posted: 6/23/2008 2:21:31 AM | Thanks for the replies guys, it means so much.
Its night times that really get me. I have real awful nights and it sets the pattern for the next day like today.
Basically, i knew she was borderline for three reasons. Firstly, she told me she was when we first met. She warned me she was crazy and would mess me up, but i laughed at it, ignored it and didnt have a clue what she was talking about.
As my time with her progressed, i realised she had major issues. I had learnt off her family of the psychiatric help she was receiving for BPD,,, but just thought she had issues with her anorexia and alcoholism. Then... things got worse, worse, worse, worse. Her behaviour was irrational, derrogatory, unbeleivable and contradicting. When it finished, i did my research into her label BPD and BOOOOOOM, realised it was SPOT ON.
Your right Quazi, i didnt want the relationship to end, even though it was killing me. I was addicted to the emotional rollecoaster and... when it was good, it was AMAZING. I did love her... when she was 'nice Jen' she was the most amazing girlfriend in the world. This lasted usually one day, then she would turn into something alien.
Basically, i understand that it could NEVER HAVE WORKED,,, but here is a list of the following things that bother my mind:
1) I still feel the pain of what she put me through at every heartbeat. The way she mentally tortured me, cheated on me, lied to me, conned me, used me, abused me........ The way i gave up everything for her and she.......... just forgot me with no compassion. Her family and friends loved me, told me i was the one for her.... she even said it herself. I cant get her evil face out of my mind, i keep thinking back to the awful way she made me feel. I FEEL SUCH HATRED IN MY BLOOD, she doesnt even care, she knew i was emotionally unstable when we split up,,, and just took a p!ss on my grave.
2) I feel so sorry for her. I loved her, wanted to save her but couldnt. I feel like she is lost out there................. what a human tragedy. I still care for her, cry for her, my 'once' babe.
3)I feel BAD about myself. The fact i put myself through this when my self asteem was too low to walk. I brought all this on myself............ what a fool i am.
4)I feel like a let down to my family, friends and GOD. They have been by my side for all of this, but i dont seem to be getting better. They paid for me to go on holiday if i promised to come back well,,, but im not, im still disturbed. HOW COMES I CAN'T PUT THIS BEHIND ME?
I feel like i have NO CONTROL over this obsession in my brain. I do normal things every day, but my sub concious will not budge. Doctor took me off diazepam because i was becomming addictive, and, it was the only drug that really helped calm me down.
For the record, i have suffered from depression in the past, but this is my lowest year ever. I am a very sensitive guy and do find it hard letting go. I can hand on heart say that Jen was my first love, at 22. HER EVIL FACE is in the back of my mind right now, i can see her stary eyes and frizzy hair looking at me saying 'I love you Mark... your the one for me i know it, i've never felt this way about anyone,, please don't leave me ever, me and you can rule the world, ... i love you Mark'. Then, i blink again and see her looking at me saying 'What do you want me to say Mark? I don't want you, you are not my soul mate, just f#ck off out my pub and f#ck off out my life... AS she knifes the cuddly toy she brought me with a voice recording saying 'I love you, Shaba'.
:( | |
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Posted: 6/23/2008 3:55:03 AM | A few weeks ago, after the end of a relatioship earlier thie spring, I was diagnosed with Bipolar II Disorder...a less severe form of BPD. My recent ex said she suspected it all along. I was prescribed the usual mood-levelling drugs, which seemed to help...for the first week or so. Then the side-effects kicked in! The rashes, chest pains, shortness of breath, and even more extreme depression during the low points! I immediately stopped the drugs. I think it was a cross-reaction with another med I've been on for many years. I think I can handle the situation better now, even without drugs, because I understand why I feel and act the way I do sometimes, and hopefully I'm learning how to handle it without more meds.
The diagnosis may be right, I don't know, but my best buddy, who has known me for nearly 30 years, says"nah, your'e not bipolar, you were just driven crazy by the last relationship situation!" I prefer his attitude!
I'll get over it, and so will I! | |
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Posted: 6/23/2008 4:59:15 PM | Ahhh no
Tonight, i learned off a friend that he accidentally saw her facebook account and now, she is listed as ENGAGED TO SOMEONE ELSE.
Whether its true or not, its enough to send a shiver down my spine and make me wanna cry. She has had 3 boys since me in the space of 3 months, and to think, she could be getting married, its not surprising.
Gut wrenching. I actually thought our relationship meant something... to her,, it meant nothing. She has just gone out and replaced me with other people,, when i felt so special to her. Soul destroying. Why do i care what she is doing? I dont know.....
Right now all i feel is hate, bitterness, regret and sorrow. Its hard carring these emotions round with you.
So depressed. | |
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Posted: 6/23/2008 6:11:31 PM |
Gut wrenching. I actually thought our relationship meant something... to her,, it meant nothing. She has just gone out and replaced me with other people,, when i felt so special to her. Soul destroying. Why do i care what she is doing? I dont know.....
Right now all i feel is hate, bitterness, regret and sorrow. Its hard carring these emotions round with you.
So depressed.
Your relationship did mean exactly what she said it meant....at the time she said it. Borderlines do cheat and lie, but usually that is to overcome feelings of inadequacy about themself, or, because they have "devalued" the person in the current relationship.
AT THE TIME, THE BORDERLINE MEANS EVERY WORD THAT COMES OUT OF THEIR MOUTH....GOOD OR BAD......One minute later, they may think totally differently about the entire situation that they are talking about.....
THE MOOD SWINGS CAN BE SECONDS APART.....AND THEY ARE VERY INTENSE.
I'm not a Doctor, but please go back and read the criteria for BPD....and see how you fit..... | |
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Posted: 6/23/2008 10:47:32 PM |
I was diagnosed with Bipolar II Disorder...a less severe form of BPD
Sorry....it seems anal, but I am one of the people trying to correct misinformation about mental health issues.....
Bipolar II is a less severe form of Bipolar Disorder.....Not BPD.....
While BPD and Bipolar can look very similar, they are different disorders... | |
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| PLEASE HELP
Posted: 6/23/2008 11:18:43 PM |
I am not discounting your feelings- you sound like the guy that probably replaced me in her life-
BPD's seem to be attracted to caring and thoughtful types..
The feelings you are experiencing are not unusual, nor unexpected- I could have written the exact post four years ago- and today I am not the same as I was before I met Liz..
I tried a couple of dates, but the feelings were not possible, the intensity of our five year relation was probably not to ever be repeated, nor would I want to - but the cost benefit of extending your own feelings and hopes just don't seem to be worth the effort-
I have pulled my profile a couple of years ago, and just engage in the forums, at first I hoped I might attract someone who was like minded through discussion, but the forums seem to be a one way street to vent.. too bad..
Hey all I can tell you is that many are going through the same thing you are experiencing right now, and some are going to in the future, these personalities are not stable, nor want to be- they have an inborn aversion to that which they seek.. and if you attempt to give it to them, they find reason to hate you for it..
The chief consideration is for you to not feel the guilt, and to put it into perspective, altho I haven't a clue to how that works, we share an experience not unlike those who serve in combat- you have to have been there to understand- I do, and I hope you are able to move past the storm...
I'm sorry that you feel the way you do....
As you have probably noticed, I am trying to gag and bind the "bad" borderline tendencies, and nurture the "helping" tendencies, without becoming emotionally involved....so far, it's working pretty well. I still have my moments, but am painfully aware that CONSEQUENCES will be doled out, if I let the behaviour run rampant.
I will keep saying this over, and over.....the borderline's emotions are so extreme, that they cannot understand, or accept how you don't feel the same....this is a universal symptom of BPD......until it is proven to the borderline that their thinking is distorted, they truly believe that their thought process is the correct one, and that YOURS is wrong....and they are prepared to go to Herculean lengths to prove it.
I agree that the personality isn't stable....not wanting to be....in some cases, yes, in my particular case, no.....I know many borderlines who feel the same as me....some, who's symptoms are much more pronounced than mine, who are working their butts off to be able to have a "workable" personal relationship.
Do we have an inborn aversion to that which we seek.....yes....why? It's called "self defeating behaviour"....in actuality, we don't believe we deserve anything, because we're "bad"....when we do "bad" we're reinforcing our belief about ourself.
My advice to anyone would be to read up on BPD, and if you start seeing red flags, back away...... | |
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Posted: 6/24/2008 7:23:24 AM | well Quazi- my point was directed to the OP and his feelings, and to try to share with him that his experience wasn't all that uncommon- but he is still raw from the experience and has a clinging emotional attachment for the ideal of the relationship, and ignoring the actuals of the relationship...
That is a feeling that I don't think is all that uncommon in these cases-
Logically he should feel elated that he did not become even more involved with a situation with no hope..
He wasn't involved nearly as long with her as some, and I doubt if anyone who has gone through the ups and downs of these spin cycle lifestyles would ever want to approach one again..
agree??
I made a point of researching as much as I could about BPD when I finally realized the problem, at first with a goal of trying to be able to find something to be able to overcome and re establish, but after a while, it became apparent that was not probable..
There are always multiple victims in these cases, her many ex's- her family, and the many acquaintances who end up scratching their heads and wondering without the benefit of actually realizing the problem.. they just chalk it up to flakiness..
He does need to be able to put it behind him, especially with the references to her evil face etc..
Inappropriate and unacceptable, and unfortunately justifiable...
I am just making the point that the OP and the rest of us who have been through one of these failed relationships are changed probably forever in the way we view life, not in toto, but smart people try not to step into the same snare twice.. while the untreated BPD is doomed to repeat ad nauseam..
Sometimes it appears that they are suffering less than the victim due to simply being able to ignore the disorder... of course that is not actually true, but with these personalities they out of necessity keep moving and it becomes their norm.. | |
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L.D.
| | Joined: 6/7/2008
Msg: 386 | |
| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 7:41:18 AM | Try someone with the other BPD - bi-polar disorder.
Then go on a cross-country trip with them, being very naive about what it is, and learn halfway across the country they've left their medicine at home.
The rest of the plot you know, if you saw the movie Sybil with Sally Field.
It didn't last.   | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 10:19:48 AM | Hey Zone Alert,
You are a sound guy, ur thoughts are so appreciative, u know exactly how i feel. Raw from the abuse, heartbroken by the way she left me and CONFUSED over how and why.
Its a truly awful time, trying to recover from this,, especially when you cant forget.
My mind is so distorted. Even though people tell me im better off out of it, she wasnt 'The One', that i can do better, that i am better off without her, my mind thinks the opposite. Instead, irrationally, i think:
"It could have been so amazing, was it me? What if she was the one? Could i have done anything more to help her?........ u know the rest.
Inconsolable. Her face won't go away. Everywhere i go, in my OWN CITY, i am reminded. Every day........... places she abused me, places she gave me the best sex ever.... places we had special moments, places she broke down, places she destroyed my soul. Will these ghosts ever leave????????
How can a 5ft 1, skinny, anorexic, starey, alcoholic, druggy, rare bag slag, fake haired freak make me fall in love head over heals with her and then bring my life crashing down. How can a succesful, intelligent, 6 ft 3, 'normal' nice guy.... become so obsessed and self pityful over a mental girl?
June ends in 1 week. I hope the next 6 months are better than the last. 2008 has been the worst year of my life, and its not even over. | |
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Posted: 6/24/2008 11:31:16 AM | : well Quazi- my point was directed to the OP and his feelings, and to try to share with him that his experience wasn't all that uncommon- but he is still raw from the experience and has a clinging emotional attachment for the ideal of the relationship, and ignoring the actuals of the relationship...
That is a feeling that I don't think is all that uncommon in these cases-
Logically he should feel elated that he did not become even more involved with a situation with no hope..
He wasn't involved nearly as long with her as some, and I doubt if anyone who has gone through the ups and downs of these spin cycle lifestyles would ever want to approach one
again..
agree??
I made a point of researching as much as I could about BPD when I finally realized the problem, at first with a goal of trying to be able to find something to be able to overcome and re establish, but after a while, it became apparent that was not probable..
There are always multiple victims in these cases, her many ex's- her family, and the many acquaintances who end up scratching their heads and wondering without the benefit of actually realizing the problem.. they just chalk it up to flakiness..
He does need to be able to put it behind him, especially with the references to her evil face etc..
Inappropriate and unacceptable, and unfortunately justifiable...
I am just making the point that the OP and the rest of us who have been through one of these failed relationships are changed probably forever in the way we view life, not in toto, but smart people try not to step into the same snare twice.. while the untreated BPD is doomed to repeat ad nauseam..
Sometimes it appears that they are suffering less than the victim due to simply being able to ignore the disorder... of course that is not actually true, but with these personalities they out of necessity keep moving and it becomes their norm..
Your post was directed at the OP, and mine was directed at you.
There's no need for you to explain yourself, I am trying to explain BPD, and show that not all BPD refuse to accept their diagnosis and try to change their lives.
I agree that most people would not want to enter into a relationship with a borderline....but not everyone is borderline. You have to enter into the relationship to find out what the person's personality is like.....and if you don't like the person's personality, you are free to leave the relationship. Manipulation, control, all of these things happen, because we allow them to happen. If something crosses your "boundaries", it's up to you to decide if you want to continue or not. It is a choice.
I am taking exception to the fact that you believe that the borderline is suffering less than the "victim"....keep in mind the "victim" has a choice to stay in the relationship, or to leave...read my last paragraph...if you accept what comes with the relationship, that is your choice, regardless of what the borderline has said or done.
Getting to the borderline...for them to do these "crazy" things...do you honestly believe that this person is enjoying themself? These things are done out of an albeit misplaced but very real belief that they are "bad" and that they will be abandoned at any moment.
My Mother and I were at a cottage....I had to go to the store to shop. It was tourist season, and everything was very busy. It took me longer than expected to do the shopping. When I got back to the cottage, Mom was hysterical, because she believed that I was angry at her, and had gone back to the city, and just left her there......basis for the hysteria....I was gone too long. Live with that for 42 years, and then talk to me about being a "victim". | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 11:48:25 AM |
"It could have been so amazing, was it me? What if she was the one? Could i have done anything more to help her?........ u know the rest.
How can a 5ft 1, skinny, anorexic, starey, alcoholic, druggy, rare bag slag, fake haired freak make me fall in love head over heals with her and then bring my life crashing down. How can a succesful, intelligent, 6 ft 3, 'normal' nice guy.... become so obsessed and self pityful over a mental girl?
Have you noticed how in one sentence, you are focused on helping her....and in the next, you are calling her derogatory names, and blaming her for your downfall?
This is ruining your life, because you are allowing it to. You have admitted that you would have continued on with the relationship and that she was the one who ended the relationship .
What need is being fulfilled by continuing to hold on to this relationship? | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 1:21:41 PM | Quazi,
Your right. Nothing is being fulfilled by continuing to hold on to this relationship. Nothing at all, just pain. Quazi, i would do anything to forget about this stuff and MOVE ON. Its what im trying to do.
This is why i turned to this message board, because i am struggling. I am really struggling to let go. Its like i have no control over my hauntings. I dont want to carry on carrying these feelings of hate, upset and damage around with me. i would do ANTYHING to drop them.... im just....... so depressed, i feel damaged. Can't seem to shake this low which has gone on for months.
Thats why im on meds and having counselling. My mind is in such a mess. Mainly, its because she left me in the most mysterious of circumstances, went on to do some CRAZY THINGS, made me feel the the villain of the story,,,, and,,,, other bad stuff happened after that. When i became heartbroken and 'sick afterwards', she knew how i was feeling but her further actions put another knife in my heart. She saw me being heartbroken as an emotion 'out to get her and make her feel bad!!!!!!
Basically, its a screwed up, sad sad story. One of the reasons i havent been able to let go is that she REFUSED to give me any closure,,, she just told me to F"CK OFF OUT HER LIFE. Thats the hardest thing to take, no closure, no explanation, no apology for her behaviour. Thats why i cant sleep at night, because my mind keeps going back to try and solve the mysteries.
How do i accept there is no explanation to a BPDs malicious behaviour?
And for the record Quazi, ur right. She didnt mess my life up, I did. I was the one who went out with her, im the one who tried to help her, im the one who stuck by her... i'm the one who set myself for the biggest downfall of my life. Im finding it very hard to forgive myself... for letting this happen to me. How little pride and self respect i must of had..........................................
p.s. i still masturbate over her...... whats all that about!??? | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 2:16:43 PM | "How do i accept there is no explanation to a BPDs malicious behaviour?"
But there is an explanation: BPDs ARE MENTALLY ILL!
All bets are off when it comes to making any sense of their actions, because they are mentally ill. All ideas you have of being treated a particular way don't exist because they are mentally ill. Therefore, there is no rhyme or reason to why they do what they do...other than...yup, they're mentally ill.
I know. I was married to one, went through an ugly divorce with one. It took every last oz. of strength for me to make it through to the other side intact.
It'll come, my friend. You just have to hold on for dear life, surround yourself with friends and family, and take each day as it comes. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm sure the beginning with your ex was hotter and more amazing than any beginning you've ever had. I bet the fights were worse, too. I bet the fights quickly outnumbered the good times in short order, but you held on to things for the makeup sex and for the good times sprinkled in. I am sure she told you you were her everything in one breath, then said I hate you in the next.
Read the books: 1) I Hate You Don't Leave Me; 2) Stop Walking on Eggshells.
Soon the veil of mystery will come off and you will realize you were played by the best. It's their agenda. That's how they operate.
Hang in there.
--J | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 2:29:09 PM |
How do i accept there is no explanation to a BPDs malicious behaviour?
How do I explain to you that there is no explanation?
Why did my Mother get hysterical, because I went shopping for three hours instead of two?
Sometimes things happen that you will never get an explanation for.
Borderlines as a rule don't apologize for anything....I have overcome that part of it....if you get an apology, let me know......
You are very young, and this is probably your first "serious" relationship....this doesn't help the situation any.
Stop trying to figure out HER behaviour, and figure out why you let her treat YOU the way she did, and vow to never let it happen again. Stop trying to figure out what SHE did, and figure out why you did what YOU did.
You are allowing this to affect you too much....I have been there, I know how hard it is to control....but it can be done.....it has to be done.
Women will probably come and go in your life...are you going to allow this to happen every time you have a relationship?
Where do you want your life to go from here? | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 2:49:26 PM |
"How do i accept there is no explanation to a BPDs malicious behaviour?"
But there is an explanation: BPDs ARE MENTALLY ILL!
Its interesting. I figure that the supposedly "rational" mind of the non-BPD wants a rational explanation, but in this case it isn't going to happen. I finally had to accept that her actions were akin to trying to explain an infinite universe....something that tends to drive someone nuts the more they try to think about it. ... thus, i've accepted it as fact....She had/has a mental illness and no other explanation is necessary.
Borderlines as a rule don't apologize for anything....I have overcome that part of it....if you get an apology, let me know......
Quazi......this is interesting to me.....my 'former' BPD did apologize, when she was in her "rational" or "normal" mode, but when she turned or split all bets were off and i was always wrong....but like i said, she would apologize when in the right state of mind. Its as if she knew she was messed up, but just couldn't control it. Of course, she may not have been BPD, but i've read a lot about the illness and she had virtually every characteristic. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 4:21:18 PM |
There's no need for you to explain yourself, I am trying to explain BPD, and show that not all BPD refuse to accept their diagnosis and try to change their lives.
again, i do hope that this inspires others to seek the same path you did.
my 'former' BPD did apologize, when she was in her "rational" or "normal" mode, but when she turned or split all bets were off and i was always wrong....but like i said, she would apologize when in the right state of mind. Its as if she knew she was messed up, but just couldn't control it.
i experienced this as well. it seems as though, on some level, they know that something feels wrong. but, they refuse to acknowledge that the problem may stem from their own issues. the extreme fear of abandonment, combined with the self-loathing and confusion of identity, results in acting out the initial rejection (regardless of how long ago it occurred).
read some of the posts here and realize that you didn't cause their problems. you can't control them and you won't cure them.
allow yourself to heal. reach out to others and allow others to help you. become re-acquainted with all the joy your life has brought you thus far. practice gratitude. learn something new. and try to put the experience in perspective. you survived this one stumbling block. now, go forward. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/24/2008 6:26:57 PM | | Whooaaa did I ever....and he was a Gemini combo. The truth is that people diagnosed with BPD can live very normal lives if they take their medication. And this "right state of mind" thing....eh hem...thats a little scarey. I think they should hook up with other BPD's....just makes sense to me. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/25/2008 7:57:59 PM |
Quazi......this is interesting to me.....my 'former' BPD did apologize, when she was in her "rational" or "normal" mode, but when she turned or split all bets were off and i was always wrong....but like i said, she would apologize when in the right state of mind. Its as if she knew she was messed up, but just couldn't control it. Of course, she may not have been BPD, but i've read a lot about the illness and she had virtually every characteristic.
I should have been more specific......
Even when I am in "devaluation" mode, I can recognize that I have made a mistake, and apologize for it....this is a fairly recent development....the old attitude was "me wrong?...never".....this is a big development, and a large step in personal relationships.
I have caught other borderlines in bald faced lies...no question about it....asked for an apology....nope....wouldn't admit the lie, even though I had proof two inches from their face.....this would send me into a rage, which of course turned the tables on me....and suddenly, I was the bad guy.....manipulation at it's best....... | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/26/2008 2:29:33 PM | Quazi....
between your input (which has been invaluable) and what i've read on mental health websites I've been able to deal with this reasonably well. Its always the hardest thing to lose someone you love, but at least the information provided by you and also those other websites has allowed me to put this into perspective and reduce the emotional damage that I suffered. Thanks Again! | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/27/2008 8:55:19 AM |
between your input (which has been invaluable) and what i've read on mental health websites I've been able to deal with this reasonably well. Its always the hardest thing to lose someone you love, but at least the information provided by you and also those other websites has allowed me to put this into perspective and reduce the emotional damage that I suffered. Thanks Again!
You're very welcome.
I'm really glad that I could help.
I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end, believe me....it very nearly killed me.
Most borderlines wouldn't admit to being borderline, (it's very painful...it's not a nice disorder)
And most people who have had experience with it, are kinda nasty....
My self esteem, and self confidence have gotten to a point, where I can talk about being BPD, and my experiences with other BPD's (and it's extensive) and not take the feedback personally. Even three years ago, what I've done here wouldn't have happened.
The most rewarding thing for me, is watching non-BPD's start to get a bit of understanding, and hopefully some perspective on their own situation.
Oh, and of course I pat myself on the back, ad nauseum, and tell tell my mirror what a wonderful person I am..... .....lol.... | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/27/2008 10:27:16 AM | Right.
Quazi, don't take this personally, but i've realised u are an aries. Thats wierd..... ive noticed a lot of people with BPD are aries. My ex was.
Don't get angry by my comments now, im speaking hypothetically. But, its well known that ARIES people are some of the most nasty, selfish, narcisstic, sadistic people out there. Cross an Aries with BPD and u get someone who, u wouldnt really want to know, not that it applies to u Quazi.
But, i'm a true believer in Astrology. For me being Pisces, dating an ARIES could never ever ever have worked because they are just too insensitive. Fire and Water don't go. U lot shud read into star signs and, u will realise...... it really is un-cannily true.
Aries,, i'd never go near another one. Ive dated two. Even my male friends who are ARIES arent very nice people.
Go and do some research. You'll be surprised. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 6/27/2008 10:37:06 AM |
I was wondering if anyone had dated or is currently in a relationshiop with someone with BPD
Everyone I have ever dated. Can we really define what is normal anymore. Now a days it seems almost everyone has some kind of disorder that makes their life so rough. Except me, I am normal  | |
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