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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 8:39:43 AM |
But, isn't the constant need/craving for attention, and drama, and the acting out to extremes to achieve it, and the 'personality adoption', including possibly 'sociopathic personality adoption', clearly part of the BPD definition? And, by the BPD individual so adopting a sociopathic persona, it then becomes so easy and effortless for a BPD individual to do whatever is needed to achieve self gratification.
Wish I could answer this for you. While I have been diagnosed with BPD, never have I sought constant need for attention or drama. I hate having attention and I hate drama. Maybe that is the norm for some but it obviously isn't the norm for all.
I will admit that at times I feel lost and unsure of who I am. But after being diagnosed and seeing and understanding what I didn't see and understand before, I've made life changing decisions in my life to better myself. I started first by eliminating all the unnecessary drama in my life (meaning toxic people) followed by focusing on the behaviors I exhibited at times and didn't like and what I could do to avoid those behaviors. One of the things my therapist greatly stressed was to identify triggers and warning signs within myself (such as specific thoughts or behaviors) and when I noticed these I needed to find some constructive way to vent. So now when I feel a mood swing coming on I go exercise or clean house. If it is really bad and the exercise or housework doesn't help, I just eliminate myself from the ratio until I've calmed down and can think clearly. I've worked hard to not be someone that people fear. After taking these life changing steps I can't tell you how many people have told me that they have seen such an improvement in me and they aren't afraid of me anymore.  | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 9:52:09 AM | Hi skybluejeep....
I'm going to start by saying that NON's cannot fathom the depth of emotion that BPD's feel....with that said...
[quoteMy ex, having BPD, (and thus also having an unstable identity), would, seemingly in pursuit of drama and/or excitement in her life, clearly and regularly, take on a perfect sociopathic personality while planning and committing acts of infidelity. She would have clear remorselessness, and no empathy or conscience anywhere to be found whatsoever. I have seen it many times, and also talked to her in this state, and found absolutely none. And, she would sometimes spend weeks convincing that person that I was a completely different and evil person. I have talked to them also.
Ok....the pursuit of drama and/or excitement is not conscious, if the BPD has not recognized their disorder....it's NORMAL...chaos was probably normal for her during her childhood. We don't CRAVE it, as we appear to....when STABILITY reigns, we get nervous, we don't know how to act.
She somehow perceived that you weren't paying enough attention to her....could have been that you went out after work with the boys for a beer....you may have fought, and you left her alone.....regardless of what precipitated the infidelity, she was PUNISHING you for something. This is what people don't get...BPD is esentially emotions gone wild. The remorselessness goes to the fact that she BELIEVED AT THAT MOMENT that you deserved what she had done. Then when she saw how the sh*t was hitting the fan, she backtracked 'I DIDN'T MEAN IT, IT DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING....I'M SORRY"....am I close? Next....would a sociopath try to convince people that you were a completely different and evil person....nope they don't give a rat's as* about other people....that was a case of plain old BPD devaluation.
[quoteShe mentioned once, what an exciting way for her to live, full of fire and passion and tragedy and intense drama.... truly a person is then at last fully alive, and only so, during this time, no... ??
Since we're getting to the nitty gritty here, I'm going to ask if she was diagnosed BPD? She almost sounds more "histrionic " PD to me. Or she was talking expansively? I personally didn't enjoy life until I worked on giving BPD up. The constant emotional ups and downs are exhausting.
But, isn't the constant need/craving for attention, and drama, and the acting out to extremes to achieve it, and the 'personality adoption', including possibly 'sociopathic personality adoption', clearly part of the BPD definition? And, by the BPD individual so adopting a sociopathic persona, it then becomes so easy and effortless for a BPD individual to do whatever is needed to achieve self gratification
I'm going to make a very broad statement here so that you'll understand.....I don't mean this for anyone specific or even BPD as a group.
AGAIN what people don't understand is that the craving attention, and drama and acting out to extremes to get it, is NORMAL for us. Acting "normal" for me was much harder than the attention and drama seeking behaviour.......I didn't know what "normal" was.
There is no question that BPD can be incredibly manipulative..but again that goes back to the abandonment issue in personal relationships, anyway.....sometimes we have to go to extreme lengths as children to get our needs met....and we get very good at it. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 5:29:21 PM | Hi Quazi,
I’d like to know more about this from a BP’s perspective:
I'm going to start by saying that NON's cannot fathom the depth of emotion that BPD's feel...
Because Nons can manage the out outward expression of our emotions does it mean that we do not experience the same “depth”?
Do you really believe that a BP’s emotions are “different” than a non’s because our outward expression of them and because our behavior is tempered, measured and controlled?
Does restraint and self control indicate that a non’s depth of emotions is any less?
Does a non not ever experience intense joy, or sadness, or grief, or rage?
Isn’t the difference the appropriateness in the level of these emotions for a given situation?
For example, should someone verbally insult or slight me I will not experience the emotion of rage but should anyone physically attack my niece, rest assured the rage I would feel and express would be just as “deep” and as explosive as anything a BP could ever imagine.
Therefore how is it that I could not “fathom” the depth of an emotion?
Isn’t it more that a non cannot fathom how a BP could feel the depth of an emotion that is not warranted for a given situation? | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 6:34:56 PM | I swear, would someone please start to kick some so called doctors in the backside.
"""Borderline"""" Personality Disorder, is this like being a little bit pregnant?
Sorry but either someone has or hasn't a disorder.
And no I haven't and wouldn't. I have a nice stress free life and choose to keep it that way. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 6:44:50 PM | | Not dated but my ex best friend is a psychotic BPD! Her ex-husband, her family, guys she dates, EVERYONE wants to get the hell away from her! People only put up with her shit for a few months, then she makes you move to Russia just to get the hell away from her. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 6:56:14 PM |
I have a question, and any input is welcome, I'm getting a new spin on how "non's" feel after a breakup from what Ceij says in this paragraph.
Here's my question....did you feel "had"...as in "duped" or "conned" by your BPD?
I feel "duped" by my BPD, but ultimately, I feel *more* "duped" by myself. A lot of the post-break-up involved self-chastisement. Never knew about BPD until the dying cries in year five when a fellow poster on a bipolar forum suggested I look up "BPD". There were so many signs in the intitial, middle and end stages of the relationship, but I got swept along into the "marvelous". How pitifully dumb can one be, is a frequently asked of myself, sub-concious question?
My guy was high-functioning, brilliant and a diagnosed bipolar on lithium. We did not experience the daily drama that others describe. However, when it did happen, it was bizarre and bewildering and damaging.
He never went into therapy. I did. He has former SO's who became alcoholics and/or are on anti-depressants. And you know, the truth of the matter is that he is not evil but he is so damaged that he needs to extract every fibre he can take, just so that he can survive. I still feel that I am in an emotional "no-man's land" but, I feel more sorry for him than I do for myself. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:00:52 PM | Yes, I have known somebody like this on and off for 20 years....they really started to change about when they become an adult....I have gone back to see how things were and had to break off our friendship after 6 months because it was causing me to be physically sick (too many ups and downs)....Both her aunt and mom have problems so I guess it runs in the family. I love her to death but now know that we could never be a couple.
Talk about frustrating though....it got to the point that it was like were completely talking different languages....tell me one day how important I was to her and the next ignore me. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:05:39 PM |
Not dated but my ex best friend is a psychotic BPD! Her ex-husband, her family, guys she dates, EVERYONE wants to get the hell away from her! People only put up with her shit for a few months, then she makes you move to Russia just to get the hell away from her.
wow...just wow.
how long did you tolerate the behavior and why? | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:09:36 PM |
Isn’t it more that a non cannot fathom how a BP could feel the depth of an emotion that is not warranted for a given situation?
Yes, non's experience intense joy, sadness, grief, or rage.....and, obviously not all crimes are committed by mentally ill individuals. Non's can be driven to "snap" just like mentally ill individuals, under the proper circumstances....it's called a "psychotic break". But, if you are driven to that "breaking point", you are no longer "normal".
So, in your rage at the person who is physically attacking your niece, how far would your "rage" go? Do you know how angry you could get? Could you have a "psychotic break", and "snap"?
I will not disclose details, but I have experienced "blind rage", literally. There have been a couple of times, that I had to be told what I did. This is the main reason, why my recovery is crucial. These were not blackouts from alcohol....I don't drink.
I sincerely hope that you never experience this phenomenon....it's extremely frightening. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:24:10 PM |
"""Borderline"""" Personality Disorder, is this like being a little bit pregnant?
Sorry but either someone has or hasn't a disorder.
The term "Borderline" refers to behaviour being on the "borderline" between neurosis, and psychosis.
Steps are being taken to re-name the disorder to "Emotional Dysregulation" disorder, or something similar to that.
Emotional Dysregulation encompasses more than Borderline, but doesn't cover the full spectrum of the illness. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 7:43:44 PM | Ceij: First of all I want to say  I don't know you, but thank you for reading my posts on this thread and whispering quietly to a very special friend of mine that I'm quite normal indeed in your eyes. I knew that...I just wanted to hear it from you. lol...(j/k)
You seem to have been affected by a BPD that made you question your own sanity at times.. and I've done the same. All of us walk a thin line of sanity and insanity if we really think about it. For instance, if someone were to harm my animals or my family, I would have no problem killing them in cold blood without ever blinking an eye. Would that term me a menace to society?? No, that would make me a brave soul doing whatever I had to do in order to protect what I love the most no matter what the consequences were to me.
Any long period of time spent with a mentally unstable person will certainly change your own behavior in the long run if you're exposed to that unstable behavior long enough. I've met a few people on here that I felt something was just "off" with them but I'm in no way qualified to diagnose them nor are they the least bit qualified to diagnose me.
All of us can exhibit some form of dysfunctional characteristics at certain times in our lives, but in the end we all have to be accountable for our actions and those that recognize that are the ones that have to have compassion for those that can't (or won't) take responsibility for their own behavior.
PS: Quazi...I'm very proud of you. You've recognized your disorder and have poured out your heart on this thread in order to help others that suffer from from BPD. Again, I'm proud of you. You've made a difference in many people's lives and will continue to do so, I'm sure.
Sans | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 8:11:12 PM | I presented an exaggerated hypothetical example for illustrative purposes but yes, I am aware of my “primordial instincts” and I am grateful I was not ever put into a situation where my emotions and those instincts were unleashed.
But we’re missing the point are we not?
So, in your rage at the person who is physically attacking your niece, how far would your "rage" go?
It would go as far as necessary to stop the attack. Should her attacker employ a weapon there would be no limit. I would not stand by and allow it to occur.
Do you know how angry you could get?
Yes, not from any experience in my past but I can certainly speculate.
Again, while I have experienced intense emotions, the control of those emotions and my actions and appropriate expression of those emotions for a given situation is the point.
Could you have a "psychotic break", and "snap"?
The definition of “psychotic break” does not apply to this hypothetical scenario. A psychotic break is defined as:
“Psychiatrists may informally use the term "psychotic break" in hindsight to describe the first episode of psychosis in a patient who has been diagnosed with the chronic condition of schizophrenia.”
“Psychosis is a symptom or feature of mental illness typically characterized by radical changes in personality, impaired functioning, and a distorted or nonexistent sense of objective reality.”
“Patients suffering from psychosis have impaired reality testing; that is, they are unable to distinguish personal subjective experience from the reality of the external world”
So the answer by definition is no.
Preventing the rape or murder of the niece I raised as my daughter, by whatever means necessary would not be a “psychotic break”.
If my perceived reality was so distorted that I “imagined” the attack when in fact it never occurred then we could proceed with the discussion of a psychotic break.
The point here is that BPs experience rage as you describe from your personal experience for reasons that nons find unfathomable.
It’s not that we cannot fathom the depth of the emotion, rather that the depth of the emotion is not proportional to what we consider rational behavior.
The point here is a BP’s emotions are neither different nor “deeper” than a non’s.
The reasons or triggers and the simplicity and intensity of the emotions due to what a non considers to be an imagined or exaggerated perception of a situation is what differentiates the two.
I sincerely hope that you never experience this phenomenon....it's extremely frightening.
I hope I never experience this as well. The inner demons that a BP experiences are frightening indeed. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 8:58:53 PM |
Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
No....but I think I have spoken to a lady with one...
I was talking with her.....she smiled and slapped my face...
she quickly apologized......but then slapped me again.
I made a dash for the door.....when I saw her walk towards the kitchen drawers | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/5/2008 10:33:04 PM | Somehow, 36 pages seems fitting for this topic.
My first clinical job, in my first clinical staffing, the topic was a patient diagnosed with BPD. The clinical director paused, looked at me, and asked if I understood BPD. I smiled and said, "Yes, I've dated them for years." Cracked everyone up, but it was no lie. Even lived with one for a while...thank God for pocket doors. I used to back into the laundry room and slide the pocket door between us and lock it then wait in there with the cat liter box until she got tired of pounding on the door and shouting names at me. First one I ever dated had a thing with knives...liked to see my blood...
I think ladies diagnosed with BPD do so well attracting unsuspecting men because in the positive mood they'll tell you all the wonderful things about yourself that no one else ever did. And they often like to make love on the first date if they're in "that mood." Such a rude suprise later when they turn and wanna kill you for something like not having a stamp handy.
I used to facilitate addiction treatment groups in state prison. Kinda for fun I'd read the criteria for borderline personality disorder to the guys. Usually about half of them would shout out that I was describing their wife or girlfriend.
Today, lots of books on the subject. Lots of great coping techniques to use for both those so diagnosed and the ones that love them. BPD is still, an Axis II diagnosis meaning its a condition that isn't gonna change, can only be dealt with by learning various coping skills.
Would I ever knowingly date a lady so diagnosed again? No way in hell.
And ladies beware. There are a few men so diagnosed. I would rather deal with a room full of ladies diagnosed with BPD than deal with one man with that diagnosis. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/6/2008 8:09:58 AM |
The reasons or triggers and the simplicity and intensity of the emotions due to what a non considers to be an imagined or exaggerated perception of a situation is what differentiates the two.
I guess my Doctor called it a "psychotic break" because no other term fit the situation properly. It was not a "fugue" or an alcoholic "blackout".
This subject is rather distressing for me, as the consequences of my actions when these blackouts occurred were life threatening.
If you can find an appropriate "yard stick" to measure your emotions against mine, and whose will go furthest before we end up dead or in a rubber room, carry on.....
There is currently only one way to measure the brain with complete accuracy....on autopsy.
This topic is moot, and I will not discuss it further. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/6/2008 1:48:50 PM |
There is currently only one way to measure the brain with complete accuracy....on autopsy.
BPD is not a physiological condition therefore an autopsy would not yield any pertinent or conclusive information with regards to BPD causes or emotions.
Furthermore, an autopsy is performed post-mortem so it cannot provide “complete accuracy” with respect to many brain functions that can only measured while the subject is “alive”.
If you can find an appropriate "yard stick" to measure your emotions against mine, and whose will go furthest before we end up dead or in a rubber room, carry on.....
Then it follows that this statement is purely a subjective opinion, conjecture, and has no validity:
I'm going to start by saying that NON's cannot fathom the depth of emotion that BPD's feel...
This topic is moot, and I will not discuss it further.
I suggest you reacquaint yourself with the following:
Any Thread that has More Than (2) Two consecutive Messages by Only (1) One single Individual within a 24 hour Period, will have their excess posted Messages deleted unless they are corrective Edit-Action Posts. (This is also known as "Sequential Replies", or posting (2) Two Replies in a Row. Please allow Others to Reply before you post again.)
See MSG 881, 882, and 883 (et al).
Such a rude suprise later when they turn and wanna kill you for something like not having a stamp handy.
Indeed! 
Would I ever knowingly date a lady so diagnosed again? No way in hell.
I concur.
It is one thing to be unaware of this disorder and to then learn that someone you care about suffers from it. It is quite another to know of this disorder and consciously choose to engage in another relationship with a BP.
I think ladies diagnosed with BPD do so well attracting unsuspecting men because in the positive mood they'll tell you all the wonderful things about yourself that no one else ever did.
In the last session with my therapist where we discussed BPD I mentioned a derogatory term a friend used to describe my BP girlfriend: “Emotional Vampire”.
I had finally understood what my therapist described as “mirroring” and mentioned the “emotional vampire” term to her.
We discussed this and I came to a revelation of sorts.
In MSG 625 I said:
Then my therapist said something to me that I did not understand. She told me I wasn’t in love with my GF. She said I was in love with the “mirror” that my GF was presenting to me.
My therapist had told me that one of the signs (out of so many) that my girlfriend had BPD was that she could not maintain long-term relationships outside of her original immediate family and especially friendships and “romantic relationships”.
From page 27 of “I Hate You – Don’t Leave Me”:
The Relentless Search for Mr/Ms. Right
Criterion 1. Unstable and intense interpersonal relationships, marked with shifts in attitudes toward others (from idealization to devaluation or from clingy dependency to isolation and avoidance), and prominent patterns of manipulation of others.
From page 29 of “Stop Walking on Eggshells”:
People with BPD look to others to provide things they find difficult to supply for themselves, such as self-esteem, approval, and a sense of identity.
So using the metaphor of an “emotional vampire” I realized:
What better a vehicle for an emotional vampire to find its hosts than internet dating?
Vampires of lore need to replace their hosts as their blood supply are exhausted then they seduce another. They are charming and prey upon the unsuspecting.
An emotional vampire looks to others to supply the thing they find difficult to supply for themselves.
In the process of receiving this they leave the host emotionally depleted and eventually the host is gone forcing the emotional vampire to find another.
An emotional vampire that is skilled at mirroring has an unlimited supply of hosts available on a dating site. What better “prey” to mirror than a person that has a detailed profile?
They can then simply mirror the values the “host” lists on their profile, seduce their prey, then begin the “push/pull dance” of “keep your distance a little bit closer”.
I think ladies diagnosed with BPD do so well attracting unsuspecting men because in the positive mood they'll tell you all the wonderful things about yourself that no one else ever did.
My therapist told me a sign to look for to recognize this I’d like to pass along as it applies to internet dating in the early stages of a relationship:
“If someone shows you complete idolization, where you are told you are a perfect being, that you can do no wrong, beware.”
Beware and if they show the signs of BPD as described in “Stop Walking on Eggshells”, “I Hate You – Don’t Leave Me” or the “Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders” (DSM), run.
Run for your life.
Remember: “You didn’t break it – it’s not your job to fix it”
Run. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/6/2008 5:29:19 PM |
She did not react well to any form of questioning on her behavior/actions.
BPDs apply “splitting” to themselves as well as others. To suggest that she was less than “perfect” in any aspect in her life was to suggest that she was completely and wholly the opposite.
hmmmm.....I think I detect the same "attitude" coming from you.
There is currently only one way to measure the brain with complete accuracy....on autopsy.
The quote above, and the quote below...
If you can find an appropriate "yard stick" to measure your emotions against mine, and whose will go furthest before we end up dead or in a rubber room, carry on
Are of course conjecture....as I have heard from numerous Doctors from numerous different fields of specialty that "Medicine is not an exact science, and results are not guaranteed to turn out as expected."
So, that means that your theory of the depth of emotion regarding BPD vs Non's, is also conjecture.
If you feel the need to pick one sentence out of 25 pages of posts, and pick on it because you're upset that I'm "whore posting", feel free.... | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/6/2008 5:37:53 PM |
An emotional vampire that is skilled at mirroring has an unlimited supply of hosts available on a dating site. What better “prey” to mirror than a person that has a detailed profile?
They can then simply mirror the values the “host” lists on their profile, seduce their prey, then begin the “push/pull dance” of “keep your distance a little bit closer”.
I never even thought of doing that....you're sounding quite hostile, Ceij......you weren't before....am I the real problem? | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/6/2008 9:25:19 PM | Quazz : You have been so helpfull on this topic. Don't let ppl stear you away from what positives you have acheived .As for ceij,I understand his frustration of not being able to do some thing about his ex.I feel he still loves her and wants to be with her,may be to tell her how he feels about her and that she can not move on with her life with himbeing there for her.I am saying this from experience who have lived with B.P.D for 20 years and the dificulty is that we have children.ceij what you have endured with your ex no where near to what I had been through with my ex over that period of time.ppl may say why did you stay that long,well HOPE. I thought I can give her a better life than the one she had,but I was wrong.
Quazz. you have been great for me allowing me to understand more about this illness.And you hav e given me answers that I have been searching for for a long time.Please keep up the good work. You have lived it,They haven't.You suffered the pain,agony,let down's,ect,but they haven't.So be positive with your actions and thoughts with experience.You know 2 years ago I was so ignorent about this illnes .But now that I have been doing a lot of reading and learning a lot from ppl such as you which Iam very greatfull to you Quazz. I have a total different view to ppl who live's with this illnes which they had not brought it upon them selve's with their own doings.It is a result of bad experience through there grown years by the selfish parents who they have have abused them while they were young.B.P.D are not to blame for their actions.ppl close to them should give them total attention they desire,thats wher I was ignorant.I wish I can bring back time,I would have done things diferent,She has gave me heart and I abused it because of my ignorance ,Iknow it is too late to heal those wounds.Or I should say those scares which they are imbeded in her memory for life.I know that ignorant ppl should be more tolerant in the future to these life's dificulties illness.Once again hang in there Quazz you are doing great.And thanks for the help of confidence you have been giving me.
And for ceij mate take it easy with your comments and if you have the slightest chance to work things out with your ex: Grab it and hold to her tight,Because B.P.D ppl Once they give their heart to their partners they realy do mean it and they look up to you as their protector who does not betray them nor hurt them. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/7/2008 2:28:48 AM | So using the metaphor of an “emotional vampire” I realized:
What better a vehicle for an emotional vampire to find its hosts than internet dating?
Vampires of lore need to replace their hosts as their blood supply are exhausted then they seduce another. They are charming and prey upon the unsuspecting.
An emotional vampire looks to others to supply the thing they find difficult to supply for themselves.
In the process of receiving this they leave the host emotionally depleted and eventually the host is gone forcing the emotional vampire to find another.
An emotional vampire that is skilled at mirroring has an unlimited supply of hosts available on a dating site. What better “prey” to mirror than a person that has a detailed profile?
^^^^What he said. Do not make a detailed profile on an internet dating site! | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/7/2008 5:29:26 AM |
Quazz. you have been great for me allowing me to understand more about this illness.
my feelings exactly.
as a non, the words written on this thread have given me a greater depth of comprehension. and any bpd can certainly find inspiration, insight and ecouragement by learning about someone who admits to having the problem, seeks treatment and manages the condition successfully. | |
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| Ever date someone with BPD? (Borderline Personality Disorder)
Posted: 12/7/2008 9:03:19 AM | Point of Order from the Forum Posting Guidelines
Replying To A Thread Subject or Post
Please ensure that all your replies are to the topic and nothing else. If your reply isn't related to the actual topic, then it's considered off topic or simply chatting, and will be removed. Replying to another post other than the original post is obviously permitted as long as what you are replying to, is also to the topic. As soon as you start replying to off topic comments, the thread is in jeopardy of being hijacked or derailed - leave off topic replies alone or the thread, if unsalvageable, will be deleted.
Remember that as soon as you utter any personalized characterizations about a poster, addressing them by name, making a direct character judgement, or an indirect generalized character judgement that is meant to include them for the purpose of belittling or insulting them, you have just turned your reply to a personal one and is subject to deletion and your posting rights suspended or removed permanently depending on severity. The full list of infractions can be found in the Acceptable Use & Posting Rules
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