| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 2/3/2009 5:06:15 PM | | mine doing the same thing i meet mine from here but his pof still says looking for long term we havent been dating long but then we found out i was pregant should i be worry that he dont want me and the baby | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 2/3/2009 7:12:44 PM | I just have to say this.............although you have a point Gottalight, the simple fact is we ARE responsible for the reactions our actions create. Our present society seems to have forgotten about personal responsibility for what we do/say and that frankly in my eyes is wrong. Someone CAN make you angry by what they do or say and THEY need to take personal ownership of the consequences of their actions. And then they need to do what they can to make it right, it's the right and mature thing to do.......................you think?? So, with that thought in mind it seems the op and her boyfriend need to try and work this out. I personally wouldn't stand for it and would certainly keep my line in the water..
Truthfully, I would be less than factual if I disagreed with the point. You can make someone angry if they let you. My philosophy teaches letting that option fall into Davy's locker, and not giving someone else that power in your life.
It comes from the Buddhist concept of detachment. If you forgive, you let the person have a different kind of power: they got away with it. If you detach, you save your principles and your belief that someone has to change their behavior to become acceptable in your space. The trangressor no longer has any power in your life. If they don't make acceptable progress toward being acceptable, they simply aren't part of your life. If they do make the changes, they can be forgiven. Forgiveness is the preferred option, but it isn't a free gift until you die.
Your last remark was fitting. Keep your line in the water. There seems to be no lack of fish, and one shark in this ocean really doesn't bother me over the next one. If you do spot a Mermaid, remember I saw her first. | |
|
| |
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 4/19/2009 6:39:00 AM | | I didn't know people like yourself really exsisted but to also post this i public??? Wow... To be honest I would want my woman to be alot stronger and more confident than a person with these qualities... Love is dangerous when it only goes one-way. He's just waiting til he feels he could get something better. It's already over between you two... Love sucks sometimes............. | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 4/20/2009 4:01:49 PM | | Luckee, he is addicted to this and possibly other website on the net. He has developed the habit of getting positive feedback from lots of women, as he needs it for his self-esteem. And without 'logging on' and getting that feedback, it's like a drug, and it makes him feel horrible. Unfortunately, unless he will realize and admit he's hooked, he won't give it up. In fact, in an addict's mind, why should he. He gets to have a great woman in real time, and get his fix whenever he wants to. By telling you he won't give it up, even if it means hurting your feelings, he's telling you he loves to have you, but he loves to get his attention from other women more than you. If you say he spends all that time with you, he obviously DOES feel alot for you, but he wants to have a girlfriend and act like a single man at the same time. And by you not acting on your discomfort over this, you're telling him it's okay. I've seen this many many times. People get so hooked on these things, as soon as no real human contact is immediate, they RUSH to the computer. It's sad, but you have a decision to make. Either accept him the way he is (you don't have to, some women do though), or don't and walk away. I think you'll probably do the former and stay because it looks like he's addicted to POF, but you're addicted to him. | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:20:28 PM | | I have to agree with badkitty718...this is very familiar to me too...after 6 months, he told me he was networking..after 8 months, I gave the ultimatium..take your profile off the dating website or I'm outta here... he took his profile off (that website)...apparently last week (after 10 months) he has been secretly on another dating website...and his networking turned into meeting women.. our relationship was a discussed, committed and very happy one...but one that was to be committed...and well..he broke that trust with his lies. If he is out there "dating" other women behind my back..online or otherwise...well... not worth my time of the day... these sites are good for meeting other people, dating, but always searching for the next best thing while keeping one on the burner...soooo not cool! Keep your guard up ...but keeping an eye on him online will eventually drive you crazy! | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/24/2009 3:47:38 PM | | Well, in all seriousness.. you should let me at least have it for right now.. maybe the women he is talkin to on here are still his friends. You have to give him some trust or your relationship is doomed to fail.. | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/24/2009 3:55:05 PM | | I'd give him the ultimatum. Places like business wbsites and myspace are for networking. This place is a dating website. Not ragging on people that are here for just friends or anything, but he needs to go to a different site for networking. You may be happy, but that don't mean he's not still trying to have his cake and eat some on the side. | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/25/2009 9:56:04 AM | Ah, I had one guy, who is just kind of friend, take me to dinner and, then, introduced me as his girlfriend to some of his friends he saw there!
Many of my friend shock me like this, when, in fact, they just like to show off even after I tell them that we are just friends...
You can't make someone want only you if they do not or make someone stop searching if they feel they haven't found the one! However, if he does not consider you the one, you should not consider him the one. If he is still searching, you should continue your search too...
 | |
|
| |
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/26/2009 1:13:45 AM | | I know I'm younger but from a nice guys perspective... If I were you'r boyfriend and I knew it bothered you, I would do what I had to do to make that happy. I would probably still want a profile, but I definitely would not have it say I'm available for dates. If having the profile up still upset you, I would just go ahead and delete. That is my two cents! | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/27/2009 12:04:00 PM | ok...this makes 2 that i've read today....
what are you on here talking about you're bf having a profile on pof...and you do as well...should he not kick you to the curb as well?
get real....
if you can't handle it, but an end to it...but don't sit around and whine about it. | |
|
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/27/2009 3:13:31 PM | Um, worrying about this will eventually tell him that you are no longer "the coolest woman" he's ever known.
some of us make friends on here and like to chat just like any other forum.
if the sex is as good for him as it is for you.....then what's wrong?
I don't know the whole story but it appears you have or are having some insecurities about your relationship.
My only advice is to sit down and talk with him rationally about how you feel. DO NOT point fingers at what YOU think HIS behavior means. Simply tell him how you feel.
PS. After said talk, DO NOT bring it up again. And don't go looking for problems when there aren't any. | |
|
| |
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/31/2009 5:40:10 AM | | You know there is a nother way you can im your friends without downloading yahoo messenger. I had the same problem at work. Yahoo has a beta version and requires no download. It is http://webmessenger.yahoo.com It works just like yahoo without a lot of the bells and whistles... | |
|
| |
| my boyfriend still has profile up on POF, what do I do?
Posted: 5/31/2009 8:31:33 AM | A couple years ago I met my ex on a personals site. I had a profile on POF and another site as well. When we decided to go exclusive, we both deleted eachothers profiles as a token of our commitments to eachother.
You can suggest you two do the same. If networking is a major concern, there are plenty other sites for that. Tell him to try FaceBook, MySpace, Twitter, etc. | |
|
| |
Home
login 
I would have to say... -touche-