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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 2/3/2009 10:35:23 PM | Hi Michaela,
Yes, some worry about growing old alone.
But this is only as a result of personal choice. You can choose a life well lived with a circle of true friends (not just fair weather ones) and a true loving family.
Some set themselves up for the life of retirement home living where they pay total strangers to wipe their bottoms. They have unconsciously chosen a life of isolation by being by themselves. They are unfriendly and always view others with suspicion.
But why let that happen at all? If you lavish your love on your friends, neighbors and family, you will never grow alone. I know people who are fabulously wealthy, but when they have parties, they only have a dozen or so people attend. On the other hand, I know people who live in small homes, struggle with daily life but when they have parties, their guests spill into the streets and their parked cars line up both sides for blocks.
So it makes sense to be generous to people now while you are young instead of being forced to hire strangers later on to take care of you.
It's really as simple as that. The more open you are, the more you won't be alone.
The only thing a fat Merryl Lynch retirement account can get you in your old age is a hired nurse or an orderly. They are not your friends and once your money stops, they stop caring.
I know many people who had money during their lifetimes but have been generous with the people around them. When they retired, even though they retired penniless, they had the warmth and support of hundreds of people in their lives. I speak from experience and I know how a true, tightly knit community works.
This is the only investment that makes any sense to me.
Be kind and generous to everyone and you will not have to worry about growing old alone. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 3/11/2009 4:38:08 PM | | life brings what it does. it waisted away worrying and death is the dept that all men and women pay. Michaela. its somthing that huants everyones mind and those who say they dont are lieing to keep face. its human nature to let the imagination run wild and think about all lifes problems or what ifs... just remember we have one life..live it well dont ruin it or waiste the time you have. you can hope to find love as we all can but hoping isnt enough you have to make yourself valnerable. your going to get shot down your going to get into some relationships that dont work out but at the end of this journy youll find it:) thats my philosophy on this matter. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:29:39 PM |
Nobody knows what their future holds..so no point worrying about it. So true, there's enough things to worry about in life.. And you know what, I have accepted the fact if I'm going to get married and have family so be it. If not, I'm happy to be alone for the rest of my life - take up nursing and go on missionary trips abroad and make my life more fulfilling. Funny, I was thinking of becoming a catholic nun but that's something I wasn't called for in this lifetime. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:33:13 PM | I do worry about it, sometimes, sure. You never know what's going to happen, what twists and turns your life may take, what curve balls Fate may lob your way.
Most people probably don't spend as much time as I do worrying about ending up in a cardboard box in an alley, surrounded by feral cats, though. That could be more my fear of financial instability, though.
But this is only as a result of personal choice. You can choose a life well lived with a circle of true friends (not just fair weather ones) and a true loving family.
"Personal choice" doesn't have anything to do with your family members wiped out by a drunken driver or your friends dying of cancer. I wish I lived in your happy little hearts-and-flowers world. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 6/13/2009 10:44:11 PM | I don't especially want to grow old alone, but I do accept that the chance of me finding a new partner isn't good, so my plan is to enjoy the company of friends and family and try to make a contribution there. When I was a kid my Dad spent most of his time immersed in seeking financial wealth. When I was a kid my Godfather, who was my Dad's best mate, became something of a mentor to me. I remember him as being the one who made the wise and memorable comments. I now have a perfect little grand-daughter, and my hope is that I can be a cool and wise influence on her life in the years that I have left, so my focus has changed.
As much as we all want to be loved, we have to have something to offer that makes us lovable first. I'm working on that. ;-) | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 6/14/2009 1:15:50 AM | I hope not! I avoid repsonding to people who are 'desperate' not to be alone - they seem to can't live with themsleves or engage life with a pinch of confidence
~sc~ | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 6/14/2009 9:57:30 PM | I do from time to time but here is some help i hope. Be happy wi8th who you are first and enjoy everything about being single. Right now i am very happy being single and have been so for a while by choice . I have been asked out and had a few dates but i want to make sure i find the right person vs the right Now person. Go out and enjoy everyday as it is a amazing blessing considering how well we live, to have food , water ,a place to live, internet lol. while so many people would do anything just to eat i try to never feel bad about being single when i have so many blessings in life. Live life just be . ! Peace and happiness to you as well. | |
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Slalin
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Joined: 6/5/2009
Msg: 188 | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 6/17/2009 10:23:47 AM | i worry about getting older, never finding anyone,even dieing by my self, but who really cares??.. too many females cares nothing about getting to know anyone. if you don't look like a millon dollars they won't have anything to do with you, i know, i've been thru this over, and over. i'am really sick of the way some of them acts, like i did something wrong by sending a message, i've really sick and tired of some other man always getting the females while the rest of us are treated as dirt.   | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 3:03:21 AM | Awe HELL we try to find somone to spend the rest of our lives with,but require the stuff thats only found in fairy tails. Nobody wants to take any chances. people will jump off bridges,airplanes,biuldings. but when it comes to going through some rough times to make a relationship what it is in reality everyone want the fairy tail thats why you see some of them on this site for years, Shit when I die through my lonley ass out in the desert and let the buzzerds eat me. Im not scared to die alone, im scared to be alive alone. IM as ugly as the buzzerds that are going to eat me but when somone comes along that has a little guts and at least wants to try to avoid dieing alone, dosent matter what they have, how smart they are, how rich thet are , if they smoke, if they are willing to give LOVE a try im willing to jump!   | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 6:57:19 AM |
Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
I worry about this. I think most people do. We know it's possible for two people to stay together until death do them part, but sadly this is becoming rarer and rarer. The institution of marriage is crumbling because of
a) Unions which were frivolous/unwise from the start
b) Infiedlity destroying otherwise solid marriages
c) Domestic abuse allowed to go on for decades inside a marriage
d) Alcohol or drug abuse
And then when the children of broken homes become adults, whatever relationships they may find are inevitably poisoned by their own formative experiences. Jesus Christ is the cure for all this hurt and anger and misery. He is the Way the Truth and the Life. May His peace be with you all.  | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 7:41:04 AM | | I do not worry about it all the time. But after two long term relationships in my life I realize that I cannot make another person value my commitment or my feelings. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 9:16:17 AM | | I just figure by the time I am a dead ringer for Yoda I will be living with about 500 cats who will be pissing all over my house, so TECHNICALLY I won't be alone. However, my mailbox will have the name CAT PISS LADY on it, so I am not sure how much human contact I will get. All in all, I do believe that I will meet the right person at the right time and the rest will remedy itself. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 8:41:00 PM | I asked all the patients at a hospital I worked in what they thought it took to keep a marraige going for more than 1 year. (These are folks that have been married for 40+ years. )
1. You have GOT to think of the other person-the younger generation finds this hard as you are all of the ME ME ME mindset. (I'm repeating what I was told by them). You have to be honest and communicate with your spouce.
2. Dont be in such a rush to get undressed.
3. Whatever Mom said, Dad says too and vise versa when the children ask to do or have something.
4. You have to WORK THROUGH your problems. Dont be in such a rush to divorce when the littlest thing goes wrong. YOu are a couple. YOu are a pair and a team. It's not just about you when you are married. YOu have to learn to compromise. When you are married you are married.
5. He/She may not be the richest, most beautiful/handsome, well to do person in the world, but he/ she treats me like Gold and always took care of me as I of Him/Her.
6. It's the Little things that count. They add up. Never hold secrets from your spouce. Alwyas do those little things that mean a lot.
These are the things I remembering on and on asking these couples who looked so cute taking care of eachother and REALLY Loving Eachother.
I know it's going to be hard and I know it will definitely take a long while. But this is what I want also. As they are together for years-even with flaws and imperfections- and yet my generation can't get past the first year.
I'll take those old folks' words over anyone's here or anywhere.
Sorry to sound mean , but I deserve to be picky as anyone else here does who truly wants to be loved by someone with quality and not the quantity of lovers.  | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 8:45:32 PM |
Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
I'm not that worried about getting old.
I'm not that perturbed by being alone.
So far I'm not worried about getting old alone.
That might change as my mortality becomes closer though. Maybe I'm in denial. It did just rain here, so my feet are wet. | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 9:27:34 PM | I worry about not being able to find someone like me or with all the qualities I want in a man, or be able to fit all his criteria, seems almost impossible. I don't worry about it as much as I will 10 years from now (I better find someone before that!!)
Otherwise, I'm sure I'll have just as much fun being here with all the fellow plentyoffishers that I enjoy reading their posts and will miss them if they leave! we all have a few, come on!!!  | |
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| Does Anyone Else Worry About Growing Old Alone?
Posted: 7/20/2009 10:17:57 PM | It never occurred to me to worry about being alone because I always have good friends and my daughter so lots of good company and I make new friends easily. I'm lucky like that.
Also I'm ok at being alone but it never lasts long because (for some dumb luck reason) good people seem to like me. Yes it's true I can be very nice when I'm not ranting about the sheer nerve of some downright cheeky **stards.
However I'm terrified of being trapped in a bad relationship - trapped out of need or deep attachment that I can't let go of. Flat out terrifies me. Been there, done that, it was a living hell. I literally felt myself dying, slowly. Took me ages to recover. Now that I'm back to full steam I will be very careful about who I hook up with again and I won't compromise that for loneliness or my sex drive etc. Been there, done that....blahblah. | |
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