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Posted: 9/30/2008 9:36:29 PM | OK, I have to say that I agree with the OP....it's one thing to be asked to move furniture the first time, but they only saw each other a total of a few hours and he moved several things for her.....she got a date, free tickets to a game, I bet he paid for food etc, and she 'had him" moving all this stuff around. He sounds like a really nice guy which is how she managed to "have him" do this stuff! He was too nice to say no...yes he was used....
 
I side with the OP here and to any guys who think he being ridiculous, I have news for you: you're getting used on a regular basis and not catching on....any woman NOT using him would have at least offered to cook him dinner or the 'furniture moving equivilent"... | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 9:43:20 PM | giggle i like some of the things u guys wrote on this one :> and true..he was used plain and simple...and heck think about it..one she is getting a free day watching a game she didnt have to pay for..and what did he get??a day of moveing her sht and her w him...poor guy!and dont knock him for being a good guy guys cause heck any of us girls would be more than happy to have a guy like that!and it doesnt make him any less a man for flexing his pecks ;> i'm sure we'd all like to watch  | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 9:50:30 PM | He used her to go to the game with
He used HER to go to the game?? You do realize they were his tickets, right? I don't see how wanting some company- particularly when you're providing the tickets- could possibly be viewed as using somebody else. In order to use somebody, you have to get something out of the situation and I don't see anything he got out of this situation except perhaps a sore back. | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 9:55:13 PM | OP, aside from the moving requests, did you like her? Did you get along well? Why avoid a woman with whom you may be in most other ways compatible? Engaging, cute women don't grow on trees you know.
I'm not saying she was right, but in all fairness, you did agree to offer assistance each time and based upon your response, I'm sure you led her to believe you had no problem helping her. Why then would she feel she's doing anything wrong? Actually, you were the one doing the misrepresenting by playing along although you had a 'tude about the whole setup.
Fading away to share your frustration with us isn't the solution. If you still feel resentment, air it out with the girl in question and maybe you guys can laugh it off and move forward. Then you can teach her the ins and outs of football. | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 10:00:41 PM | He used her to go to the game with
He openly admitted she was the cutest. He wanted arm candy. She just took advantage of it. Girl 15 love Man 0
Gosh, it's just horrible when a girl takes on a man at his own game. No pun intended.
She was smart. He wasn't.
My thoughts on why he wrote this post? She had zero interest in him as a potential mate and he is feeling rather burnt. If she thought he was the Prince of Princes and ooooooooooh and ahhhhhhhhhed over him him, wellll....he wouldn't be here writing that post, would he now?
And the dance.....and the game....of love goes on and on and on.....
Learn to play it. It's not a bad game. OOOOOps...that word again...game. | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 10:10:04 PM |
You do realize they were his tickets, right?
We realize he had the tickets....but we don't know if she had to buy one off him to go to the game....not enough info. And conveniently, the OP hasn't been back to shed any more light on the situation. So, as usual, we are left here to theorize and speculate and guess.
Bottom line is, after moving the furniture and going to the game, he went back. After moving the H2O heater, he went back again. I'd say he had just as many ulterior motives as she did.
~ds~ | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 10:21:55 PM | Frankly I have a hard enough time asking friends for help. Asking a man that is basically a stranger wouldn't happen. Mabye I need to take lessons from this woman instead of watching my house fall down around my ears. Any plumbers out there?  | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 10:27:04 PM |
He openly admitted she was the cutest. He wanted arm candy.
That's not what he said. He said, "I chose the gal who had the most interesting response and a cute picture." The only superlative he used was in regard to her response, not her looks so it's a bit of a leap to assume he was only looking for arm candy. | |
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Posted: 9/30/2008 10:30:04 PM | Semantics...he was a guy and picked a cute picture.
He's a guy!
Interesting? He got interesting!
Where is he? Dollars to donuts he's been given the bum's rush from this "interesting "girl.
Hey, Handsome...come back on...tell us all. We are dying to know. | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 12:01:06 AM | Whew, this is one tough friggin jury pool. HE JUST MET THIS WOMAN.....
Three dates... and she has him moving furniture, moving 100 lb hotwater heater., moving lumber. I think she has you mixed up with a moving man.
However, she asked you to do these things and you could have said NO. I am guessing you were doing your thinking with your _ _ _ _
I generally am OK doing such things. I would not have lifted the hot water heater, you could have dropped an "o" ring like that. She was RUDE asking a stranger to start moving her furniture around because you are a man. It's like inviting a woman over for dinner and asking her to cook it when she arrives. TACKY AS HELL.
For all of the women on here giving him the business, this woman was rude and just because he took her on a date does not obligate him to be her moving man.
Respect yourself, because if you don't no one else will. | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 1:37:23 AM | aloha: (wink) just curious
Cowboy, you're focusing on the work and missing the fact that it didn't matter if the guy said "yes" or "no," the inappropriate request was already made.
What made this woman a user is there was no offer of reciprocity on her part.
Alhoa you were not there were ya? (please tell me this wasnt you Darlin....) Thats what I thought (wink) YOU have no idea how this offer was made or accepted. Or if there was
What made this woman a user is there was no offer of reciprocity on her part
You have no clue what she said or what he thought was offered in exchange either. Now please lets just stick to facts and quit making up stuff because your mad. Look Aloha! LOL I like ya (really do! LOL) but read this stuff your writing ? LOL Your adding nonsense to the thread supporting this guy trying to make your point. (and we both know why) You do NOT know what was said or offered. he did this three times. Might be a hint that at least HE thought that something was offered. LOL 3 times... Or he is a slow learner perhaps ! (wink) If a sweet gal asked me for some honey doo's NICELY with a huge smile and helped a little I would of never had a problem. Now it looks like the responses are sorta 50/50 so your oppinion is respected here! I am NOT right. We simply agree to disagree on this issue. (wink) Thats what a forum is about.
Again... all he had to do was be man enough to say "NO" Darlin. This isnt hard. You have said NO right? Certainly NOT as hard as moving a hot water heater.. I was "in" on the furniture moving and the lumberr but..... I might of balked on that hot water heater..... (wink) Others have said he looked really big in his profile photos so maybe she was really interviewing him for furniture moving as he interviwed her for football ticket gal. (wink) Wouldnt that be funny?
I need to be selling POF T-shirts that just say "NO" on the front. (wink) All gals should wear them on their first dates on POF. (this guy should wear them on his next date with her)
LMAO
Smooches to you aloha! (grin) Darlin I am NOT picking on ya. We are just disagreeing on a point of view here. But dont add silly stuff to the guys thread for him that you dont know at all. Unless that was you at the football game?? (wink) Then you and I both have no idea how this offer was given or received. Or what was expected. (wink) Just base your responses on the little facts written.
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Posted: 10/1/2008 4:58:25 AM | The only way I would move a furniture on the first day, if it's a sofa, couch, or something like that, and we going at it!!
Never done it on the water heater. Or on the pile of lumber.. Splinters in her a**.. | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 6:18:46 AM | Got a pm on this one this morning. john.duke12 doesn't know how to post in forums, so he sent it in pm for me to post. Here's his contribution:
((First he quoted my post from pages ago, so in the interests of integrity, I will post his whole note verbatum!))
I posted:
Jayzuz OP .. ya do know that your post shows on your profile and well .. that's just it! it shows You.
I think cowboy has the right notion .. it's about give and take. And as another poster said - good thing you didn't break a nail! lmao
..
I spose if she'd carried her own lumber, moved her own furniture and known more about football she'd have been 'too independant'. .. sigh .. I thought "Men" enjoyed feeling needed??
And what's the big deal with doing a favour or 3 for someone? eh??
tsk tsk tsk ..
A.S.is
I'm not sure if this is another posters note or if it is part of john.duke12's educational series, but it was with his post, so as promised:
1. Men are expected to be very independent and self sucfficent. No man ever asks a woman to do him a favor before a first date.
2. Women dont like being needed. They don't enjoy taking care of us.
3. Why are men supposed to do male/female housework and woman should only be doing the female work. Women these days don't even cook and end up doing less traditionally female work. &5% of housework is done by men,
4.Knowledge of football=independence?
john.duke12 said:
you women can say what you want but until you're doing the favors in the beginning without getting back its meaningless.
There. Now if you want to reply to this post or make a comment on the OP (Original Post), just click on the little button right below this post .. the one that says [POST].
OT - I do think that honesty is a dying virtue. Had this weak man simply said "No." to the requests for his manly services rather than doing something he (obviously) didn't want to, he would have shown he has integrity. Doing a favour and then whining about it in public forum is just very immature.
re the duke suggesting that we women can say what we want, etc. = Who said "we" don't do favours without expecting anything in return? There are Lots of good people in this world who Do things for others without expectation of payment and without whining. They do things to help out, because it's just the right thing to do. Often those who help without expectation do get a pay back - they feel Good, just because they did a good turn. I can't imagine crying over any of my Volunteering or the things I may have done for others. I can imagine me saying "no" if I felt I was being used unfairly though.
Some of us women seem to have more bells than Some .. ok 2 men at least! lol
A.S.is
ps
Could someone please come over and take the top off my peanut butter? I'm in a bit of a jam .. ;) | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 6:29:52 AM |
In truth I really abhore women of this ilk.
I have seen too many who use and abuse men while talking in a soft and sexy manner.
I also become disgusted with the men who are so weak that they do not see clearly through these facades....
And yet.....I have to acknowledge that some of those gals - seem to be accomplishing more in the way of manipulation.
I couldn't DO it personally.
But I know women who can, who will, and who do.
Can I kiss you?
One of the things that I also abhorred when I was dating was these type of women. Unfortunately they are everywhere. The moment that you are around they become practical invalids incapable of lifting a finger. Interestingly enough I have befriended some women like that, and it's crazy the things they do to a guy, and how they take it, and what is worst, is how, they really don't care that much for the guy. The guys have becomes, as one of my friends call them, puppy dogs. I also have a sister that in her youth was almost recruited for the Miss Venezuela beauty pageant. My dad didn't let her. But that meant part of my job was to get rid of all the puppy dogs that practically littered our existence of boys that wanna be with her. Eventually the men she married were those that paid others to do the work but were emotionally absent of themselves. To this day, she still doesn't move a finger, but while life used to be something she controlled, no it controls her.
Now back to the predicament of the OP. And here I am going to semi agree with Cowboy, but not completely. Hehehe. I agree that this guy needed to early on set the stage for how he related to this woman and he failed to say no. And actually, the fact that in every encounter she had him do something, while not doing anything for him, tells me that she gave him a test, and he didn't past it. Sometimes you have to be man enough to do all the lifting, sometimes you have to be man enough to say no. Now, I am only going to semi agree with Cowboy, because the reality is that most guys out there, simply go ga-ga for a gal that is even slightly good looking and turn into drooling puppy dogs with NO cojones. Nada. I've seen big mean, bust your face bad as ses turn to mush in front of these type of women. They just don't know any better. | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 7:15:25 AM | I saddens me that some people seem to think that everybody has an ulterior motive for doing things.
Case in point: The last time I was at my trailer, I noticed that the pilot light on my propane fridge had gone out. And because a fellow camper had started it the last time as it's an older model for which I don't have the instructions for (and the start-up looked like nothing I'd ever seen before), and mainly because I respect anything to do with propane, I thought it best to get an expert opinion on how to proceed.
So I took a walk to the beach in the search of an "expert" opinion, hoping I'd run into somebody I know. Instead I ran into a group of people who just happened to be listening to some Pink Floyd, and I commented on their excellent taste in music as I walked by:)
Which got us all talking and introducing ourselves...which led to having a lovely man and his wife offering to give me a hand with my fridge...which led us to my trailer....which led us to sitting down to soft drinks and sharing a laugh or two.....which means I now have more friends than what I started with that day and for whom I would gladly return the favor.
It's all a matter of perception in my opinion. I like to think that most people are happy to help a fellow human being if and when possible and for no other reason than because it's the right thing to do. Naive and outdated way of thinking perhaps but it works for me and I like it that way.
JMO
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Posted: 10/1/2008 9:33:00 AM | As is. : LOL How many people did this guy reply to on here privately whining??? frustrated when he couldn't figure out how to post in the forums? I got one also. LOL Posting here really isnt that hard is it?? He couldn't figure out how to post? Uhhh the reply button works for me.
The one I got from him was a rant about how women wanted dominant not submissive men. (wink) Geez... Was he supposed to slap her and tell her to get a beer from the fridge or what? LOL
I would of asked for the beer, smiled, kissed her, and moved the couch... And had her helping on one end too. (wink)
LOL
Cowboy | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 12:12:42 PM | | Cowboy: I got one too, complaining about my post. Then he sent another one - where he had a go at me about someone else's post! | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 12:31:40 PM | Well what the heck?! I'm starting to feel a little left out here.   
~ds~ | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 12:41:40 PM | I'd be feeling excluded but I'm feeling Groovy( yeah he's here and won't let me stop touching him!)
Out wants to kiss me! (teasing darlin, I know you're taken!)
Muuuuuuuwah! | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 1:00:24 PM | Hey, can someone come over and help me open this bottle of beer? No? OK, how about this bottle of wine? Sheesh, can't a girl get any help around here? Where are those manly men when one needs them?!
And, Cowboy, I know you have a few of the ladies here in a bit of a tizzy, but you've gotta stop "(wink)ing"....makes me think you've got a serious, nervous tic! | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 1:09:18 PM | "And, Cowboy, I know you have a few of the ladies here in a bit of a tizzy, but you've gotta stop "(wink)ing"....makes me think you've got a serious, nervous tic!"
I'm gonna have to second this one.
Ok guys, where's my plumber? And while I'm at it - I need the house painted and...
Gee GoneSailinBabe - the boobs didn't work. Boobs I got. Ok so they are old broad boobs and hang down the knees, but they are still boobs. She must have been really cute.
Edit: A.S.is - personally I won't respond to anyone that can't post for themselves. | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 1:10:33 PM | LoL, That's messed up.
Your first warning sign was that she doesn't watch football. Why would offer a ticket to someone who doesn't even watch? Regardless, she obviously had intentions for you from the beginning.
Hopefully, your smart enough not to call her back, but if you do, make sure you invite her to your house to mow the lawn;) | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 1:27:07 PM | Oh My Gosh this thread is way to funny...... OK I guess that since I am the type of person who has stopped to help complete strangers I am finding this very funny. I like walking around my neighbourhood and I have quite often stopped to help folks who are trying to move things on their own, for example a woman trying to move a couch out of her house and into a truck or a man who was moving a very large fridge on to a truck. Or even just a senior taking their groceries from the cab at the end of the drive to their home. LOL I was brought up to believe in helping my fellow man or woman. I think that by deciding to just drop this possible relationship/friendship he may have just shorted himself. After all now she owed him a favor, who knows maybe she is an excellent baker or cook, hmmmm there may have been a nice home cooked meal in his near future.......
"I know from experience that doing favors for girls is not the way to their hearts. "
lol I guess they must do things a bit differently in your part of the world but where I come from life is made better by doing favors for other people, because folks remember who has helped them and are more likely to help you... Oh well | |
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Posted: 10/1/2008 1:59:24 PM | So we've got women who can't move furniture and guys who can't post notes to forums. Can't anybody do anything for themselves these days???
(Judging by the dirty underwear thread, apparently not)
you were not there were ya? (please tell me this wasnt you Darlin....) Thats what I thought (wink) YOU have no idea how this offer was made or accepted. Or if there was
I'm discussing this in regard to the information provided. When I veer from the facts to discuss information that may be absent, you'll know it by the inclusion of words like "if," "maybe" or "perhaps." There was no mention of reciprocation in the OP's post, so follow your own advice and " just stick to facts."
quit making up stuff because your mad.
Show me one fact that I've made up or any indication that I'm "mad." This is the second time I've had a discussion with you and it's the second time you've tried to paint me as some highly emotional creature tapping away furiously at the keyboard with no evidence to support it. You obviously don't get me so don't try to guess what my emotional state is. What you do know full well about me is that in the course of a disagreement I view all the "darlin"s, "sweetie"s and "winks" as condescension yet you bring them out in full force whenever you address me (don't think so? Compare the notes to me with the others in your history) so your "I like you" statements sound completely phony. | |
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