|
|
|
|
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/6/2008 3:27:18 PM | I was raised the same way as you, chocolatenutt. I STILL help people,and people have helped me. Yep, I've caught and held onto loose horses, chased loose cattle off the road, pulled people out of ditches and snowbanks. When I was a kid my folks helped people, and as a couple with my late husband, we helped people...and the response to "what do I owe you" was always, "Help somebody else when the opportunity presents".
But there is no part of being "country", that lets somebody bring their kid on a date,especially someone they barely know, let the kid be difficult, and invite themselves to stay at someone's house. We might be more relaxed and casual in the country and in small towns, but we are very conscious about not wanting to put someone to extra trouble!
Cindy O | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/6/2008 4:01:54 PM | It would seem I need to clarify some things in my post. First off, I do NOT think that what the guy I dated did is typical of "country folk". I do think it was rude, and very thoughtless.
Now, the house I lived in was owned by my girlfriend, who hailed from a small town, in the same area that this guy came from. So, we met through association (he dated another friend of hers before me). So, we had met previously, but only briefly, and I was paying to live in my girlfriend's basement.
But yeah, the whole bringing the kid on the second date thing threw me for a loop, and then inviting himself to stay over...way over the line. I never did go out with him again.
So, I apologize to those of you who thought I was stating that what he did was typical for country/farm raised people. When I mentioned that it never occurred to him that he was crossing the line, I should have clarified that as an individual he believed what he was doing was perfectly acceptable.
My bad.  | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/13/2008 3:45:13 PM | | Gotta ask. This has been keeping me up. Opportunity missed, opportunity wasted. Does anyone know if the deck was ever finished? Phone number? | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/13/2008 5:26:57 PM | | Dude i think she is using you a donkey, tell her to kiss off. | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/13/2008 5:28:01 PM | | OMG, really now. I dated a man for two yrs. In those two yrs., I cut wood, I'm talking cutting down the trees, chain sawing them to 24" lengths, loading them onto the flatbed, unloading them to the splitter and stacking it all after. Then bringing wood inside for the stove when I went to visit. I helped him clean his fathers camp, (refrigerator full of winter mouse droppings), tons of dog hair and dust. I helped him work on his trucks at times and move things around his yard with his tractor when needed. Then this guy found someone more girly on the internet and never said to many words to me again. In those 2yrs. I had alot of fun, drank alot of beer, had alot of bonfires, rode alot of trails and had some good loving to boot. I would do it again in a minute. I learned alot from this man and kept myself toned in the meantime. I didn't care for the way he exited, but hey nothing was written in stone. We got to know alot about each other because we spent so much time together. Was alot better then hearing that he had things to do so we couldn't meet up. Those were some very memorable times and stepping stones to better ones. I'll always help out if it means being with the man I'm dating. Watching those muscles flex and body sweat is one sure way to get me all worked up and ready to please my man. HMMMMMMMMMM | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/13/2008 5:37:48 PM | I think she just wanted to see you in action, wanted to see if you would be a working partner and not just a play thing. At least she didn't ask you to do the dishes or clean the bathroom. Your reaction would have shown me that you wouldn't be the man to want to build a life with me, but one that prefers to lay back. Never know what a date can turn out to be.  | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/14/2008 11:03:42 AM | | So if a man asks you on a date and orders you to get busy scrubbing his toilet are you down for that? Using someone you are just meeting to perform services for you is using, just plain and simple using. I would only ask a man to help me perform home maintenance duties if we were in a marriage. | |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/14/2008 11:25:54 AM | So if a man asks you on a date and orders you to get busy scrubbing his toilet are you down for that?
Ummmm........how does the above statement jive with what the OP wrote about?
I have been on many first/second dates in which the man is fumbling with a list of things to do. You see...full-time career single people have lots on their plate when they don't have a partner to share the burden.
I stated in a previous post on this thread that a man asked me if I wanted to help him bottle his wine. We had a ball!
Another 1st date was with a man who wanted help in buying his parents a 50th anniversay gift. We laughed ourselves silly reading cards for an hour.
Another 1st date involved a man who took me for a lovely lunch and then said he had to go back home and move irrigation pipes in his fields. We were having such a great time and he asked if I wanted to come out with him and help him. I dragged pipe until I was exhausted and then we both fell down in the growing hay and talked/laughed until
almost dinner-time. He then took me out for a lovely steak dinner.
At no time in my life have I ever been ORDERED to do something on a first date.
I have also asked men to do things for me if the occasion arises that makes it fun and companiable. I have found that most men are more than willing to do things for a lady that they admire.
OP NEVER complained that she ORDERED him to do these things.
Sweetnessinkeys, you have made a rather ugly assumption.....I think it will hurt your chances of a good man if you will NOT let him help you unless you are married. That brings up another subject entirely that scares the hell out of men.
1.Women who think to change things once they are married.
2. Women who are so loving to men in the courtship phase that they DO EVERYTHING for the man to show them how wonderful they are. Then turn into something else when they are married.
Think about it.
| |
|
| Put to work
Posted: 10/14/2008 12:49:22 PM | I was asking. And i have my opinion and i am entitled to it, unless someone up and volunteeted to do your dirty work i find it to be using, simple as that, in my book anyways. The reason i say i will not allowz az man to help me unless we are married is that, i will not be sharing my household with anyone unless we are married, and do not expect anyone who is not part of my household to do household chores.
I have had a good man in my life, in fact the mosts wonderful man that I ever encountered in my lifetime married me, the only reason we are not together anymore is becaause he died, not because i didnt let him drag my water heater. I have had dates offer to fix things on my home or my investment properties, and i simply tell them thank you but thats not what im dating you for, i have a hired handyman for that. | |
|
|
| Page 7 of 7
|
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
|
Home
login 
